Chapter 51: 3.5

It was difficult to strike up a conversation with the solemn man who already didn't harbor good thoughts toward him. It wasn't like in his original body where he had prestige, intellect, good looks and a body he knew exactly how to use. This wasn't a one night stand he can be shameless with. Right now he was a brat recently recovering from Princess syndrome trying to cultivate good feelings, any positive feelings really, with a stone-faced bodyguard.

After a few more awkward questions like 'What's your favourite color?' ('…Yellow'), 'Favorite food' ('…Meat.'), and 'Favorite thing to do?' ('…Train.'), Jia Hyson was mentally and socially exhausted. Fuck, Laozi likes these sort of strong silent types but give him a bone at least!

He would be fine with this, he didn't like talking much and enjoyed quiet time a lot, so he could even be quite satisfied with these responses.. if only the obvious dislike weren't dripping off every single word. It felt like each letter was double dipped into a jar filled with disdain.

Jia Hyson has to say he feels for Farrell. Secretly bullied, physically different and even scorned by his own bodyguard. Jia Hyson would definitely have lashed out too. Maybe not in the same ways but still, like, maybe seventy percent the same.

Bebe: '…Bebe isn't sure that's a good thing or not. Somehow Bebe feels that host 'lashing out' would involve less drugs and nonconsensual sex and more murder and weird dubiously kinky sex.'

Jia Hyson: '…Bebe it turns out you think so badly of me, I don't think we can be friends anymore.'

Bebe: 'Who says we were friends? ╮(╯∀╰)╭ Bebe doesn't have such perverted friends ah.'

Jia Hyson: QAQ

Finally, Jia Hyson eyes the books on the shelves of his room. "What about reading? Do you like to read?" He asks a little desperately. Just one shared point of interest other than having two legs and arms and the ability to breath oxygen would be great! Even acquaintances can complain about shared troubles like bad bosses or stinky teachers but if Jia Hyson dared to complain about his first world problems to the future rebel Sefu Karamoy who knows what unslightly end his life will finish at in twenty years?!

Sefu's heterochromatic eyes- and Jia Hyson needs to have a long talk with Bebe about this later- darken. "I only know the alphabet." His raspy low voice conveyed a very displeased and humiliated tone as he confessed this.

Jia Hyson: '...Fuck! Did Johan only teach you how to fight?! Why is he illiterate?!' (ﾟДﾟ?)

Bebe: 'Samotrelis is a warrior country still behind the times. Generally lower-class people are taught about herbs, animals and fighting skills, things like reading and math are for specific schools that can only be entered by those with some status like the wealthy families and merchants or scholarship students. Most servants with poor backgrounds will not know how to read or write. Since he already knows the alphabet it probably means Johan has only recently deemed him acceptable to serve as a personal attendant and started to teach him these things.' It made sense, if Sefu was not a good warrior with no talent to personally serve royalty why bother to waste resources and time to teach him calculus?

However it really never occurred to Jia Hyson, who lived multiple worlds now where education was a very common and valued aspect of life. Even in pre-modern China as Bai Li Wei there may have been a lot of uneducated people at that time but there wasn't any who he had personally met. The cultists were high profile people and the high school kids were.. well high school kids. All his victims were educated okay? Maybe some weren't but they sort of died before he could ask them okay?

The point was he genuinely didn't even consider that Samotrelis, this luxurious place, had such a gaping flaw.

Jia Hyson: 'I'm so screwed! Now it looks like I knew that he wasn't educated and it's like I purposely provoked him with that knowledge! Wuwuwu!'

There had to be something he could do too quickly amend his faux pas and successfully sell some meng at the same time!

Sefu Karomoy watches his charge give a dumbfounded lost look, like a stupid little kitten, and his mouth twitches. Even though the young prince was a brat, he had to admit that the brat was indeed quite pleasing to the eye. No wonder people just let the evil things the child did go so easily.

"W-well.."

He watches Prince Farrell struggle so obviously, a sliver of satisfaction goes through him at the sight of one of those caught royal bastards actually struggling to get something they want. He wonders if the brat will finally give up this kissing up facade and show his true arrogant tyrannical personality now.

Suddenly those golden eyes flash brightly with inspiration and determination. "Well then I'll teach you!"

Sefu: '???' This doesn't seem to be in the script?

The little prince had already rolled to the other side of the bed and run up to his bookshelf. After a moment of thought he pulls out a rather large book that was as thick as Sefu's arm. Even though Prince Farrell was considered small and weak in Samotrelis he was still much stronger than his age group in other countries, even a little ahead of those a year or two older even so carrying this sort of large book wasn't very strenuous. Of course since his appearance was like a normal, if slightly tall, non-Samotrelian child the visual contrast between such a big heavy-looking book and the thin arms of a little boy really made the youngest Samotrelians prince seem very pitiful and hardworking.

Sefu who actually knew how to read: '...' Oh no, suddenly feel like I'm the scummy one now.

Jia Hyson silently pats his own back at his idea. Teaching the guy slowly and patiently how to read would definitely bring them closer together! And he knows this works from experience. He fucked his super hot chemistry tutor this way. It was his first time with a guy. And he also totally aced his high school final chemistry exam so it was big win-win because he had been shit at chemistry. Like, what even are redox reactions? Who knows but that guy's ass was a chemical reaction all by itself.

Bebe: 'That was pretty bad.'

Jia Hyson: 'Look, I don't remember enough chemistry to think up a sufficiently dirty yet well-referenced chemistry pun okay? Give me a break.'

Bebe: 'Do you even remember that man's name?'

Jia Hyson: '..It started with a H? I remember he was a super cute twink with blue glasses if that helps?'

Bebe: 'No. It doesn't. You're the worst.'

Jia Hyson: '...' Yeah. That's totally fair.

Throwing the book onto the bed with a soft 'thump', he crawls back onto the bed excitedly and makes sure to sit closely next to the older man in order for him to see up close and personally how dedicated Jia Hyson is at sucking up and selling meng. "Okay!" He grins widely at a tense looking Sefu. However instead of the blank disdain, there was a hint of confusion and bemusement in those heterochromatic eyes. It was enough to tell him that he hadn't gone wrong at least.

Then he looks at the title of the cover and freezes.

Jia Hyson: 'Hey, Bebe.'

Bebe: 'Hm?'

Jia Hyson: 'I thought Farrell could read. Isn't that his childhood hobby?'

Bebe: 'Um. Bebe isn't the one with the memories. Did host get mixed up with the ages?'

Jia Hyson: 'Wha- it's not my fault all children between seven and eleven all look the same age!'

Bebe: 'It kind of is. Also seriously? Can you not tell people's ages?'

Jia Hyson: '...I once accidentally hit on a fifteen year old.'

Bebe: 'Host… ew…'

Jia Hyson: 'He was taller and bigger than me! And he had been wearing a suit! I mean, have you seen those young ones these days? It's like their parents fed them trees! Injected with growth hormones! Also we're asian! It's really hard okay!'

Bebe: 'Host.. you know how couples say in order to build stronger relationships they need to be more honest with each other?'

Jia Hyson; 'Yes?'

Bebe: 'We are not one of those couples.  ಠ_ಠ Please shut up.'

Jia Hyson: '…oh.' His Bebe didn't love him anymore QwQ

So it turns out Jia Hyson had assumed wrongly. To be fair it was kind of hard to tell where the past memories turn into future memories since they are felt like one weird dream like movie sequence to him.

Prince Farrell had only recently gotten into reading stories. Those bookshelves were so full because the moment he hesitantly showed some interest his doting family had bought out a local bookstore. At this point he, as a prince of course has been taught to be literate but as an eight year old who liked to ditch his tutors, his ability to read was not that strong. Mainly Farrell quite liked looking at the picture books and other books with many drawings.

Jia Hyson obviously was an avid reader but Samotrelis has it's own native and very non-chinese language. It wasn't very english either which was like, the only other language Jia Hyson was fluent in all aspects in.

So if Prince Farrell didn't recognise a word… Jia Hyson wouldn't either. Luckily he still knew Samotrelis' alphabet and could phonetically sound things out if things got tough. Still. As someone who had acted so confident in teaching Sefu before, it was quite… embarrassing ah.

Jia Hyson: 'Bebe can you translate?'

Bebe: 'Sure give Bebe five minutes to download the language.'

Jia Hyson: 'Hahaha fuck you this Laozi needs it now! What five minutes, I can't even give five seconds and you know this!'凸ಠ益ಠ)凸 'Spicy chicken system peh!'

Bebe: '...' You're a spicy chicken. Your whole family are spicy chickens ba!

"Umm, this book is called.. The… Ad-adventure! Adventure of Moh, Mohck, Moka!" He glances at Sefu self-conciously, "This is the Adventure of Moka." Jia Hyson then repeats it very seriously, saying it so fluently and assuredly that if Sefu hadn't heard him struggle in the beginning he was sure he might have actually believed the little prince had read it before.

Sefu's mouth twitches again. This time it was much harder than before to suppress his smile, "I see. This lowly servant is eager to hear about Moka's Adventure." He says, a faint undercurrent of mirth in his raspy voice.

Jia Hyson: '…' Fuck! You're going to make this kid keep going knowing how much this laozi struggled reading the title alone?!

It turns out this shard was such a sadist!

Bebe: '…' Bebe seems to recall two shards in the previous world that were actual murderers who killed many, many people but okay, whatever.

"Okay, okay, well," Jia Hyson could feel himself sweating a little from the anxiety. It was like reading out a speech in front of the entire class that you hadn't practiced because you only wrote it up the lunchtime before class started. He turns the page and inwardly swears. He picked this book because it was thick but who knew there didn't seem to be a single picture despite having so many pages! "Uhhh… On a night… filled with storms, oh, no, I mean, on a stormy night! Yes, on a stormy night there was a boat that… drifted? Drifted. It drifted onto the beach. In the boat was a… a… ahh, a baby! Um.. Moka! In the boat was Moka!"

"Pft-" Jia Hyson whips his head toward Sefu who had covered his mouth and was looking guiltily away from him.

Jia Hyson could actually say, he has never felt more humiliated before. And he once had-

Bebe: 'Nonono, Bebe doesn't want to hear that!'

Jia Hyson: 'Hmph. Fine.' He also didn't want to relive that memory.

Biting his lip, Jia Hyson trembles in anger and embarrassment as he stares daggers at the some-what comprehensible words on the pages. It made one feel the little prince was particularly loveable but at the same time made one want to tease and bully him relentlessly. Sefu felt his heart itch a little, like a little kitty paw scratching gently at it.

"So what happens next?" His low voice rasps out, now coming out a little warmer and more teasing. Not that Jia Hyson notices as he is busily being wrapped around his own rage at the fact this rebel bastard, after laughing at him. Still. Wanted. Him. To. Read!

"Moku… Moku is found by an, ah, old man and woman. The old man and woman are-" With stilted sentences, Jia Hyson slowly, excruciatingly slowly, gets through three pages before he is finally stuck.

"It was Moku's one, no, Moku's first! First of many, uh, mhm…" Jia Hyson tries to whisperingly sound out the word under his breath but each time it didn't sound right to his ears. Frustrated and already taut with nerves and mortification Jia Hyson's childlike body couldn't take the pressure and began to tear up.

Hearing the sound of repressed sniffling and the way the little prince's words were beginning to shake, Sefu, who could read all along, began to feel absolutely terrible. Feeling like if this keeps on going he would be unable to rid himself of the guilt forever he clears his throat awkwardly. "Ahem, this lowly servant does believe the word is 'expedition'."

Jia Hyson: 'Oh so it's actually like- Wait a moment!!!'

Large watery golden eyes stare up, shock turning into baleful accusation toward the guard. It was like looking at a puffed up kitty cat being teased which made Sefu itch to play with him some more. "You said you didn't know how to read!" Prince Farrell protests in a small but warbled voice filled with betrayal. Sefu however could only hear the indignant wailing of a small cat tickling his ears.

Despite finding the little prince amusing and cuter than he had expected, Sefu's face remained as still as a glacier that had never heard of global warming. "I only know how to read that word," He deadpanned.

Jia Hyson: '...' Do you think I'm fucking stupid ah? What demented teacher would teach you the word 'expedition' and nothing else?

Sefu, sensing the child's distrust, lowers his head so his black and white eyes are directly in line with Jia Hyson's golden ones. Solemnly he says, "This lowly servant swears to the Great Wild Spirits it's true, I really only know that word. This lowly servant is greatly appreciative of your highness teaching me to read."

The Great Wild Spirits was the Samotrelians equivalent of gods. They valued them greatly and they use them for various ceremonies and blood oaths. However it seems Sefu wasn't just rebellious toward the idea of a monarchy but their religion too. Damn, invoking the Great Wild Spirits' names in vain to trick a child! How low can this man go?!

For the sake of nurturing friendship Jia Hyson decides to lovingly let this go. Because that's the sort of person he is. Loving, kind-hearted and totally not one to viciously hold grievances in his heart which he will slowly pay off bit by bit to the person who wronged him in various petty, passive aggressive ways.

With that in mind, after shooting one last suspicious look he continues to slowly read aloud, a little embarrassed at how much he was still struggling. This was the first time he had a body with such good physical stats but with low IQ. "Okay, um, the expi, expo, expedition set off and Moku was very excited. Moku wanted to bring great gl, go, g…"

"Glorious pride." Sefu finishes for him with not a single change of emotion. In the Samotrelian language Samotreli, 'Glorious Pride' was a single word. Well, actually 'Glorious Pride' was like the equivalent of the word 'Ice' in Scotland, there was over four hundred different ways to say it. It was a very popular term in this warrior country. However that was not the problem here!

Jia Hyson looks discontentedly at Sefu, "You swore on the Great Wild Spirits that you didn't know anymore words." He accuses accusingly.

"What type of Samotrelian would I be if I couldn't recognize a few words that represent Glorious Pride?" Sefu retorts calmly, the sort of calm that can only come from a thick face filled with shamelessness. "Keep going your highness, this lowly servant is interested to hear more."

Jia Hyson's face turns ugly. More? This bastard wants to hear more?! More your sister! This Laozi knows you can read perfectly okay?!

"You! You! You!" He stutters enraged. Who would want to continue being shamed like this without getting an orgasm at the end of it?!

He wants to punch this no good guy! He wants to punish him! He wants to, to!

Jia Hyson wants to spank him! Yes! The most mortifying punishment!

A man almost on the threshold of adulthood being forced to lay down on a child's lap to be spanked! How humiliating would that be?! He would definitely protest at first and struggle, but soon his curses will turn into cries of mortification as slap after slap hits his backside. Maybe the friction from the spanking forces his hips back and forth on the fabric of the bed and against Jia Hyson's legs causing some... involuntary stimulation, unwillingly stimulating the already embarrassed man and then... hehehe. ( ´͈﹃ `͈ ) ～ ♡

Bebe: '...' What happened to being nice to the future rebel leader? No, what happened to the decency of humanity?

Unfortunately Jia Hyson's sadistic switch had already been flipped and Farrell had never been great at self control so almost subconsciously he excitedly blurted out, "Let me spank you!"

Bebe: '...' Bebe wants to slap host but Bebe is afraid host would get off on it.