Chapter 33: Where Shoggoths Dare…

Chapter 33: Where Shoggoths Dare...

I... am currently constructing a shelving. Emergency. Sweets-based emergency. I don't have sufficient storage space in my room to place all the... Just... WHY. People. Why. OK, I get it, this is shaping up to be stupidly profitable. You're excited. It's a custom to bring the first product to the owner. But for crying out loud! Moon Unit is giggling at me, inbetween nibbling on a piece of shortcake and pointing out the places she thinks would be best for shelves that I'm fashioning out of leftovers from my tinkering. Pro - filigree metal and wood shelves are fancy enough to fit the room well. Con - I HAVE TO MAKE SHELVES.

It is in the middle of this disaster Bridgit brings Selene in. Who takes one look and starts giggling. Traitors. I'm surrounded by traitors. Cute, cute traitors. So, in order to put an end to giggling, I distribute more shortcake around. Bridgit thankfully pitches in with putting stuff on the shelves, and then so do both others. "Leave what you find personally appealing on the table. Might as well have this for breakfast." - I grumble, as I leave a box of green tea cakes on the table to set an example. It... might have been foolhardy. So I hastily amend - "I mean, what you find personally appealing and intend to eat right now."

"Sooo... what's up with a sudden cornucopia of sweets?" - asks Selene as she hefts the box on the bottom shelf. Box that is full of shortcake. Must resist shortstack jokes.

I sigh. "I accidentally a confectionery." - I tell her, and she stops. Turns. Stares.

"You accidentally destroyed a confectionery and those are the remains of this?" - she quips incredulously - "Gosh, I knew you were a villain all along."

I wave her facetiousness off as I lift the last of jars on the top shelf. "I accidentally found myself in possession of enough sugar that opening a confectionery seemed like a good idea." - I tell her.

"Wait, what? How much sugar are we talking here? Also, what do you mean, opening a confectionery? When are you going to attend lectures then? Or is it going to be an afternoon-only thing?" - she interrupts... And I suddenly understand she has a problem comprehending the scale of what I did.

"Right. In order, how much sugar? Six tons and a bit. More to come. When I say opening a confectionery I mean that I bought out a storefront with attached warehouses and offices facing Merchant Square of the bazaar, refurbished it to meet my sensibilities and hired two dozen people to make the things you see all around yourself and sell them there. I also bought out a smaller storefront on the opposite side of the warehouse facing People Square. The one facing Merchant Square is set up as a cafe and takeout shop rolled in one, they also serve tea and juice and whatnot to make the sweets go down easier. The one facing People Square is essentially a bakery shop." - I explain to her, and her face slowly elongates with my explanation.

"So... What you're telling me is that you now own your personal bakery and shop and cafe attached to it?" - she inquires incredulously - "And this all is going to be available to buy at the market every day from now on?"

I have only one thing to answer with. So I put the green tea cake into her mouth, and nod while she sputters indignantly - "Yes, indeed." And then I pick up two more cakes and turn to my wives. Who are genre savvy and already wait for me with their mouths open. Good girls.

___

"I'll say it again. There's cheating, there's blatant cheating, and there's you." - Selene fumes - "I can't believe you can just... casually open a shop."

"They couldn't have gotten far, you know." - I have to keep calm. Keep CALM.

"They had a mage... move them to Sultanate." - he admits - "Nasty magic, it kills the mage who casts it."

Well. Fuck. Wait. I just injured one mage here. Although I cracked his skull, it's not certain he is already dead. Maybe I can... I turn around and grab the mage out of the bodypile. I was right, he is still alive. Barely, but that is more than enough for me. I put my hand over his eyes, and just to be a memeing little bitch, say "Embrace eternity!" before sticking tentacles into his brain through eye cavities. And... there it is, the teleportation spell. I force the guy to teleport across the room, which kills him, obviously, but also gives me more than enough data on how the hell does this work. And I can pull it off. Not flawlessly, but I can.

"Lady Gillespie, what did you do!?" - Abe yelps, more than a little surprised.

"Ah. Well... I do not know how to teleport." - I offer to him - "DID not know. But I do know how to hijack someone's mind. So I hijacked his, forced him through casting teleport and learned what he did and how. Coincidentally, they are barmy idiots. It is possible to teleport without killing the mage casting it, but they never figured out how. It's preposterous just how overcomplicated the spell is for something it actually does. Take me to the spot where they disappeared, I'm going after Lily-Anne. Can't take anyone along, I'm afraid, it's going to be hard enough to teleport back here with her alone."

He jerks. Starts to object. Falters. Grabs my shoulders. "Are you confident you can do this?" - he asks intently - "Are you sure and certain?"

"Leave it to me, your highness." - I tell him - "Sir McGregor is scouting the castle for wounded right now, lady Selene is in the main hall healing. Prince Constantine has been wounded by the intruders, but he is already attended to. I'm not sure about everyone else, take me to the spot and search the castle then. I'm pretty sure Abbas only had himself and Lily-Anne transported, so the rest of the Sultanate ambassadors should be still here. Grab them, make them turn on that gem of theirs they use to talk to Sultan. I imagine he has a few things to say to you."

He clenches his jaws and gestures abruptly - "Alright, men. Ten of you - to the ambassadorial quarters. Have all of them brought to the main hall, by force if necessary. You four, with me. The rest, split into pairs and search all the halls and rooms for hostiles and wounded. And... dead. If any of you find sir Pasteur, escort him to the main hall if he is able to move, carry him there if he is wounded or worse. We need all the healing expertise we can get right now. Oh, if you stumble upon squire McGregor or any other squires, send them to the main hall if they need healing, fold them into a searching group otherwise. No one is to go anywhere alone, we might have more of those sons of jackal-humping whores sequestered around the castle."

He turns to me, and motions me to follow. Oh, wow. Abe must be really pissed to swear like this. Then again, his daughter just got kidnapped, and that's after he declared he is not a party to this to begin with. Abbas, why. Why are you such a moron? Were you dropped on your head when you were little?

The spot, when we reach it, is almost indescript. Just a part of the corridor outside of Lily-Anne's rooms. But the traces? Oh, the area was literally saturated with dimensional magics. A vapor trail under the fabric of reality, stretching towards south. Something I could easily follow. "Ready, your highness. But, and this is important. I need this part of the corridor blocked off when I cast, and it should be blocked off until I return. Anyone who tries to look will be immediately defiled, and in these circumstances? I'm pretty sure most would go insane on the spot and try to claw their eyes out to unsee what they have seen. This is going to be one of the most dangerous ways to become defiled, and mage sacrifice is, in a large part, dedicated to suppressing precisely that. Stupid on their part, what's wrong with simply ensuring no one is looking when you cast?" - I explain, as I factor the trail into my mental mathemagics.

"Won't it drive you insane then?" - Abe objects reasonably.

"Don't worry about that. I'm already as defiled as it can possibly be." - I toss back, and I almost see a lightbulb going on above his head as he instantly jumps to wrong conclusions as to how the hell I am such a powerful mage. I wait for them to clear out, concentrate and... And... AAAAND!..... BWOING.

And I manifest in the courtyard, in front of at least a hundred of assorted servants and guards. All unarmed, because I fucked the Sultanate pretty badly. And, what is much more complicated, I manifest without any form. Or, more precisely, I can not maintain my form, I'm literally roiling. The joys of 360 degree vision - seeing as sanity flees from over a hundred pairs of eyes in practically the same moment. Welp. I guess I can not help them, but I suppose I can at least give their insanity some kind of... not so harmful direction. Besides that, I am angry. I'm volcanically angry. The conflicting emotions smash into each other and coalesce into a singular earth-rattling ROAR.