CH 59

Chp 59 

The Girl At My Part-Time Job Makes Sure

[Haaah…]

As I was wiping down a desk at my part-time job, I released a long sigh.

It reminded me of what happened during the day. The moment our hand touched, she pulled her hand back as if she was avoiding me… Ah, damn it, why did I try to hold her hand forcefully.

It’s true that Hiiragi-san taught me how to do it, but thinking back, wasn’t it a bit too early? Shouldn’t we take our time on building our relationship? At least, there was no need to be in such a hurry and try to make sudden skin contact. The more I think about it, the more regrets I have.

No matter how worried I am about it, nothing would change, and the best thing I could do is to ask Hiiragi-san, who is the best person to talk about it with. That’s what I thought and I kept waiting for her to finish her shift while I was doing mine.　

[Hiiragi-san, I’d like to talk to you for a bit after I finish my shift, is that okay?]

[…Sure]

A slightly down voice answered me. Feeling uncomfortable with her unusually depressed state, I went back to finish my shift.

After our part-time job, we started discussing as usual.

[I tried to hold her hand when we went home today. But the moment I touched her hand, she avoided me… This means she doesn’t like me, right?]

[T-That’s not true!]

[…Eh?]

When I told her what happened today, Hiiragi-san replied strongly, which was unlike her. She denied it, and in a somewhat hurried voice, and I couldn’t help but feel surprised and let out a strange voice.　

I guess she could see my confusion, because she coughed and regained her composure.

[Ah… no… I’m sorry for my sudden outburst. It could be for another reason, right?]

[Is that so?]

[That’s right. Girls get very nervous when the person they like touches them. Even if they know they’re supposed to hold hands… they get nervous and feel very embarrassed]

Hiiragi-san’s cheeks gradually blushed as she spoke, which was strangely alluring. I couldn’t help but be drawn to her as she gently expressed her feelings. Of course, I knew it’s embarrassing to talk about a girl’s heart to a guy, but when she acted so shy, it made me embarrassed too. The openness of Hiiragi-san’s feelings made me nervous. (TN: Does it count as cheating if you like the persona of the person you like…)

[I-I see…]

[When you are touched by someone you like, you’ll be aware of it. That’s why if it’s unexpected or sudden, we’ll be more nervous. It’s not that we don’t like it, it just a little nerve wracking, that’s all]

She turned her head slightly in embarrassment with her cheeks dyed red. She continued to hold her own hands as she muttered in a faint voice.

[I see. It’s true that I was suddenly trying to hold her hand. Is that why…]

Hiiragi-san’s opinion was convincing enough for me to come to a conclusion. It’s not just girls that get nervous, but boys too. Just the thought of holding hands makes me nervous. I don’t know how nervous or calm I would be if I was able to hold her hand. I guess it was the same for her.

Hiiragi-san crossed her arms as if to think for a moment, and then came up with a new piece of advice.

[…Then, why don’t you ask her properly this time? Then I’m sure she’ll let you hold her hand, right?]

[But, if she really didn’t like it, wouldn’t she hate me even more?]

Hiiragi-san’s opinion makes sense, but there’s always a chance. She’s not good with the opposite gender in nature so there’s no denying the possibility that she didn’t want to be touched, even if it’s by someone she was fond of.

If that was the case, it would be a bad idea to go and ask. I couldn’t help but feel awkward about it.

[I don’t think so… If that’s the case, it’s even better to ask. You don’t know what they’re thinking if you don’t ask. If you do ask, then you would understand them, right?] (TN: FOR ONCE, THERE’S SOMEONE WHO GET THIS LOGIC)

[Y-yeah…]

Sure, I thought about it, but it was only what I imagined. You won’t know what she thinks until you actually ask her.　

The anxiety won’t go away unless I ask her. Even if she didn’t want to hold hands, it didn’t mean she would lose her relationship with me. Maybe I should ask her properly.

[Of course, I can assure you that she wouldn’t mind, so please listen to me. Absolutely, is that clear?]

[Yes, I understand]

She looked at me with a somewhat serious expression, and I could feel her desperation. She wanted me to listen and take her advice properly, as she was very insistent. I had no choice but to nod in agreement.