CH 84

“Elena! Elena!” Gareth shouted, his voice now hoarse from the constant shouting he did throughout the day. His anguished cries bounced off the trees and echoed throughout the forest.

“Broaden the range!” Gareth yelled desperately, remembering Elena’s words.

“You believe me, don’t you?”

“It’s important to me.”

Gareth uttered harsh words under his breath and began to search more frantically, looking around his surroundings without stopping. However, the cruel weather had wiped away any traces of her.

At that moment, Gareth heard wolves cry from a distance. Despite hunting them down a few days ago, the persistent animals in the forest howled, heralding the prelude to a grim night. Gareth became even more restless, knowing that Elena couldn’t survive in a place like this. He then recalled her words once again.

“It’s important to me.”

Gareth berated himself for not telling Elena that he believed her. ‘Why couldn’t I have said that! Just why! Damn it!’ He had never doubted Elena would do such a thing like push Lydia down the stairs, but he hadn’t been able to reassure her.

“Elena!” Gareth shouted again. For the past 11 years, he had never shared his feelings or thoughts with anyone. All he had experienced were injuries that almost brought him to death’s door, and all of a sudden, he had become a mercenary and nothing more. He no longer felt like a human being. All he could perceive was life and death, and the fact that he was alive at this moment. He didn’t bother looking for and caring about anything else, since he couldn’t bear to continue living his filthy life whenever he tried to live normally like others.

Gareth let out an agonized scream, then yelled again, “Elena!”

Elena was the only person who had stayed by his side until the end, even when he had lost himself to bloodlust. She was the only one who had quelled his insanity with her warmth.

‘What on earth was I so afraid of? The reason I hid her from everyone else is…’ Gareth could feel his heart hardening. ‘Why did I try so hard to defend the estate? Why did I clear out the forest? Why did I…’

Gareth exhaled, his face paler than the puffs of white breath he spewed out into the cold air. Only now realizing that he had done all these things because of Elena, Gareth began to lament. ‘I only wanted her to be safe… I only wanted to protect her!’ He wanted Elena to become strong and independent not because he wanted to protect himself from developing a weakness, but because he was afraid that someone might harm her.

“Elena!” Gareth cried. At that moment, the chilling sound of wolves crying shook the forest, claiming that they were the hunters that ruled the night in the woods. ‘Please, Elena. Please stay alive. Please!’ Gareth desperately prayed. Caught up in a panic, Gareth ended up sliding down a steep slope, accidentally letting go of his torch.

He swore under his breath as he stood back up and drew his sword. Gareth was now unable to search a wide range at once since he no longer had a light source. He wasn’t concerned about his men encountering similar situations as they had been trained to prepare for such circumstances and had shown excellent skills during practice. However, he was worried sick about Elena.

Gareth looked around, adjusting his eyes to the darkness to gauge his location. His breathing suddenly stopped for a second when he noticed a lump on the ground covered in snow. Gareth rushed over and began to dig through the layers of frost with trembling hands. His heart pounded uncontrollably as if it were going to burst. Drenched in sweat, he felt as if the moisture on his shoulders was going to freeze from the cold air. Nevertheless, Gareth didn’t feel cold. He continued to relentlessly dig through the snow until his hands came into contact with something. ‘This is…’

“Elena!”

Gareth lifted the woman who was lying before him and held her tightly in his arms. He felt his heart stop for a moment when he realized he couldn’t feel anything from her frozen body. Gareth took several deep breaths to try to calm himself before he removed his gloves and felt around her chest for a heartbeat. Elena’s cold, frosty skin scratched his hand as if to push him away.