CH 9

Inexplicably guilty, he grabbed Gu Chenbai’s sleeve

Tu Yan had always been surprised at his willfulness in front of Gu Chenbai. Before he met Gu Chenbai, he hardly ever lost such childish temper. 

He treated most people coldly, and never made intimate friendships with others, so the evaluation of him from the outside world was also very unified; on a good note, he had artistic pursuit, while on a bad note, he was difficult to get along with, conceited and looked down on others. 

No one used “cuteness” to appraise him, except for Gu Chenbai. 

He always thought about how Gu Chenbai said he resembled a little rabbit. If someone else were to say it, he would probably flare up then and there, putting the other person on the spot. But when Gu Chenbai said it, he felt his heart pounding. As though he had been seen through, he could only turn around in a hurry and put on a mask to prevent Gu Chenbai from taking advantage of him. 

The way Gu Chenbai treated him seemed to have no bottom line. Tu Yan had obviously said some unpleasant things, but Gu Chenbai would still smile at him gently. He remembered that once, Gu Chenbai was accompanying Tu Yan to watch a documentary in the living room, which was about all kinds of stories in hospitals. In one of the episodes, the protagonist was an amputee patient. After watching halfway, Tu Yan still didn’t know the problem, and judged one of the prosthetic limbs of one of the patients, ”Hey it’s still noticeable, there’s still a little limp to the way they walk.”

After saying it, his mind rang in alarm. Realizing that it was wrong, he immediately shut his mouth, turning off the documentary and changing it to a variety show. With the loud applause of the audience, he nervously glanced at Gu Chenbai from the corner of his eye. Seeing that Gu Chenbai held his walking stick and headed to the kitchen, Tu Yan was shocked and wondered if this person wanted to get a knife or something, or to teach him a lesson for saying something wrong. As he was finding an object for blockage in a panic, Gu Chenbai came out with a plate of fruits instead.

He placed the plate of fruits in front of Tu Yan to let him have some fruits. Tu Yan looked down; they were all his favourites. 

“Something urgent came up at the company that I have to deal with, so dinner will be a little late. If you’re hungry, eat some fruits first, okay?” 

Tu Yan nodded his head dazedly, then followed Gu Chenbai with his eyes as the latter went to his office to handle his business remotely. 

Gu Chenbai didn’t really walk with a limp; he kept fit all year round, the entire person had a very good sense of balance, and he was quite skilled at using the walking stick. Without looking carefully, one wouldn’t be able to see that his right leg had a physical disability. It was probably because he normally took care of Tu Yan too well that Tu Yan sometimes forgot that Gu Chenbai was the one who needed to be taken care of. 

He suddenly felt that Gu Chenbai’s retreating silhouette was a little lonely. 

His mood also got worse. 

He thought about how wherever Gu Chenbai was cooking, it was inconvenient to do anything because of the existence of a walking stick. He had to place the walking stick next to him when he chopped vegetables, while his entire frame leaned against the cupboard, and had to pick the walking stick back up again to cook them. Tu Yan still remembered the first time he saw Gu Chenbai cooking; his heart was thumping, feeling a little afraid and also a little guilty. So, he suggested finding a nanny, but Gu Chenbai refused, and even asked with a desolate look on his face, “Is my cooking really that bad to eat?” 

Tu Yan immediately shook his head, “No.”

“Then, why?”

Tu Yan couldn’t answer him. He didn’t want to say: Find a nanny to take care of your diet and daily life, so you don’t have to suffer so much, and I also wouldn’t feel so guilty. 

After a while, Gu Chenbai said, “Yan Yan, I don’t really like having outsiders at home, can we not hire a nanny? If you think that my cooking is not good, I’ll learn again.”

Tu Yan felt depressed. Why did Gu Chenbai always say such things that made his heart turn sour, leaving him without anywhere to release his anger? He lowered his head to button up his buttons, saying muffledly, “Up to you, this is your house anyway.” 

Afterwards, Gu Chenbai really shut himself in the kitchen to improve his cooking skills. He placed his ipad on the windowsill and had to spend a couple of hours every day experimenting. Tu Yan gripped the edge of the wine cabinet to peek inside, and saw that because Gu Chenbai was turning around in a hurry, he almost fell down several times. Tu Yan stomped his feet in anger, not understanding why Gu Chenbai had to torture himself like this. 

Tu Yan didn’t like that Gu Chenbai was holding his tongue and took on all the responsibilities on his own, making Tu Yan look like a vicious villain. 

So, this time, when Tu Yan had said something wrong again and made Gu Chenbai upset, Tu Yan wanted to express himself. He waited until Gu Chenbai finished his work and was about to head to the kitchen to cook dinner, and stopped him, “Gu Chenbai, why not go out to eat tonight? Or go see a movie?” 

Gu Chenbai stood in place and smiled, “Yan Yan, what other unequal treaties do you want me to sign?” 

“I don’t have any,” Tu Yan’s face turned red as he said offensively, “If you don’t believe me, you can either go or not.” He wanted to leave after saying this. 

Gu Chenbai blocked the way in front of him and passed a step for him to get down, “Eh, what a coincidence, how did you know I really wanted to see a movie today?”

Tu Yan hummed and put on an air of reluctance, “Oh, which one do you want to see?” 

“Your latest《City Train》, it shouldn’t be offline yet, I haven’t had time to watch it.” 

“Why must we watch something I acted in?” 

“I just want to watch,” Gu Chenbai said with a smile. 

Tu Yan threw down the word “boring”, then fled to his room to change his clothes. 

He changed a new inhibitor plaster, and even armed himself from head to toe, not forgetting his mask and sunglasses. When he walked up to Gu Chenbai, he almost got a fright.  

As they hadn’t had dinner, while on the way, Gu Chenbai forced Tu Yan to eat a sandwich to cushion his stomach, not allowing him to have popcorn and coke for dinner. When they got to the cinema, Tu Yan was still huffing in anger. He only cooled down when Gu Chenbai bought him a big bucket of popcorn. 

They sat at the corner of the theatre. Although the viewing angle wasn’t very good, the point was not to be noticeable and to be safe enough. 

When the movie started, Tu Yan ate his popcorn with disinterest, his train of thought drifting several times. He was unable to remain focused on the movie, because he shot this movie with Qi He. At that time, for nearly every film, they rolled their eyes and called each other idiots behind the cameras, despite acting as a sweet couple on screen. Now that he thought about it, this film could almost be classified under his dark history and he wouldn’t want to watch it the second time in this lifetime. 

Hence, Tu Yan felt extremely agitated right now, not knowing if it was because of Qi He, or because Gu Chenbai was sitting next to him. 

Gu Chenbai watching very seriously, staring at the big screen without moving. Tu Yan threw popcorn into his hand, but he didn’t even have time to respond, only putting it on the palm of his hand as he continued to watch the movie. 

Towards the end of the movie, Tu Yan was about to start dreaming, but he vaguely heard the screams of the people around him, and suddenly opened his eyes, thinking something big had happened. When he looked up, it turned out that he and QI He were kissing on the big screen. 

It’s just a kiss faked from a special angle, what’s so surprising about it. 

Tu Yan was complaining in his heart, and then was about to close his eyes. When his eyelids just stuck together, he suddenly woke up again. 

Hold on, kissing? 

Swallowing his saliva, he turned his head to look at Gu Chenbai. Sure enough, Gu Chenbai wasn’t looking at the screen. He had his head lowered a little and was slightly frowning. 

For the first time, Tu Yan saw an expression similar to “discomfort” on Gu Chenbai’s face. 

Inexplicably guilty, he grabbed Gu Chenbai’s sleeve, but Gu Chenbai withdrew his arm expressionlessly and rested it on his lap, as though he never felt it.