164 Yearning to Escape
“I don’t know what’s going to happen now but I’m definitely breaking up with Ace. So, let me stay here with you for a while...” I confessed softly.
“Have you spoken to Ace about this? Are you absolutely sure that she’s pregnant with his child?” my mother asked after recovering from her initial shock.
“No. I was too shocked to speak to him. He hasn’t tried to get in touch with me, though. She also demanded for his responsibility, so I think that is clear enough it and of itself,” I replied before heaving a heavy sigh.
“That’s not good. As a couple, you should always talk things out. I know that it can be difficult to talk about something like this but even you do end up breaking up with him, I still think that you should talk to him properly and break things off properly,” my mother suggested sternly.
“Maybe you’re right...” I muttered.
'
Maybe I should talk to him. Maybe it was only right that I gave him a chance to explain; however, I just didn’t know how to face him right now and I didn’t want to hear any of his excuses either.
“Let’s go to bed, Rina. Tomorrow will be a better day, I promise you that,” my mother told me before offering me a very kind smile.
My mother looked like she had other questions on her mind, but she didn’t end up voicing any of them. That night, I slept on my old bed in the same room as my mother. Once the lights were switched off, I realized that I was so scared to spend the night alone and that was why I was so thankful to have my mother with me. It wasn’t like I didn’t know what I would probably have trouble sleeping tonight. My emotions were very mixed, and I didn’t look forward to the arrival of the next morning at all.
...
.....
“Oh, you’re up...” my mother greeted me when I walked into our small living room.
“Good morning...” I mumbled before slumping down onto a chair at our dining table.
My body felt so heavy and so did my mind. Non-surprisingly, I didn’t catch a wink of sleep last night. I was sure that if I had fallen asleep, all I would do was have a nightmare about Claudia marching into the office to announce her pregnancy before screaming at Ace for him to take responsibility for it.
“Some breakfast? Well, considering the time this might as well be lunch,” my mother said before smiling at me.
She placed a plate of food in front of me with a glass of water before she took her usual seat at the dining table opposite from me. I could see the worry in her eyes and hear it in her voice. Although I had absolutely no appetite for food, I picked up the fork before taking a bite of food into my mouth.
“You’re not going to work today?” I asked.
“Nope. I’m taking the day off to take care of my only daughter,” she replied.
“I’m very sorry about all this...” I mumbled.
Actually, I felt sorry for all the mistakes and wrong decisions that I’ve made. Maybe life working at the core of the city and in large corporates wasn’t something for me. It had always been my dream to work at Jessen’s and Hill’s but now I wasn’t sure about anything anymore. Putting it bluntly, I had lost all self-confidence. Placing your trust in the wrong guy twice in a row could have that much of an impact on me, I guess.
“Rina, I think you shouldn’t worry too much about it. As I tried to tell you last night, I think everything will clear itself up when you talk to Ace...” my mother said as she seemed to shift uncomfortably on her chair.
“I’ll try to talk to him, mum...” I said to ease her worry.
The truth was that I still didn’t want to talk to Ace or see him. He also had not given me a call or tried to contact me in anyway. Today was also a workday, so he must be at the office and busy with work by now. As for me, I had decided to take leave from work because I didn’t have the guts to turn up to work and pretend that nothing had happened the day before.
My mother sighed loudly before she shook her head slowly from side to side. My eyes hurt and were probably still swollen from all the crying that I did last night. Although I didn’t get any sleep, I wasn’t sleepy at all. I wondered what I should do for the day and what I should do with my life going forward.
Maybe I should just give it all up and quit my job. Moving here to live a humble and quiet life away from the chaos of the city might be better for me. People might call me a coward but what’s so wrong about wanting to protect myself from the harshness of this world?
Suddenly, the doorbell rang.
I almost jumped up in my seat at the sound and that just went to show how on edge I was. Since I wasn’t expecting anyone, I glanced over at my mother to see if she was. It seemed like I was right, when my mother calmly got up from her seat before heading towards the door. I let out sigh and began relaxing a little on my chair as my eyes stared absentmindedly at the food that was still left uneaten in front of me.
“She’s inside. You’re welcome to come in...” I heard my mother say.
I watched the tip of my fork toy around with the food on my plate while I knew full well that it was bad manners. At that point, I just didn’t care about anything anymore, let alone my table manners.
“Rina...”
The voice that I didn’t want to hear and the voice that I wanted to hear the most spoke my name.
–To be continued...