Chapter 120 - Making Plans

AYLETH

Etan swallowed and shifted, pulling her tighter against him so the quilt bunched between them. "I think I know the best plan for today, for our return."

"What is it?"

He blew out a breath. "Normally, far less attention is paid to me at the castle, than to you. But with my father's summons, that may no longer be true. I cannot be certain that your father would not use it as an excuse to… arrest me."

Ayleth's stomach clenched. He was right, of course. 

"I think," Etan said softly, "we should enter the castle separately. Borsche can assist me to get inside without the usual attention, so I might reach my parents without the knowledge of the Court, or the people. If I'm able to speak to them privately, without the pressure of witnesses, I suspect it will be much… smoother. While I sneak in with Borsche, you can enter as you usually would. Even if people have somehow learned of us, to split our entrances will split the attention, also. And you, at least, are not at risk of arrest."

"We hope," she said dully.

Etan's hands tightened on her. "Do you truly think—"

"No, no. You're right. Even if my parents had heard, they would treat me as a victim, not a traitor—at least until they knew I'd come to you willingly. You're right, Etan. That is… the most likely way to succeed in addressing this privately."

"There is more," he said, as if the words were dragged from him. Ayleth stared, her stomach churning. "What is it?"

"Divide and conquer," he whispered, stroking her hair again.

Ayleth frowned. "What?"

"I know we must be united in our cause, Ayleth. And we must stand together. But I believe no matter which of our parents we approach first, if we go together, we risk igniting true conflict between the Kingdoms if the other King hears of our meeting. I think… I think we must enter separately, call our parents to counsel immediately, then bring them together."

Ayleth swallowed, shaking her head. "No, Etan. I do not think—"

"Hear me out, please: If we were to go directly to my father and yours was to hear, he might send the guards, just as you've said. If we were to go directly your father and mine was to hear, he may believe I have been coerced, or am taken prisoner and it could push him to action against your father before he knows the truth. 

"But if I speak to my father, and you to yours, then we bring them together… it is the best chance we have that neither will fly into a rage at the other and break the peace. The Accord is tomorrow, Ayleth. We must only get them through one more day! And there is one more thing… There is a small—very small chance that neither of our parents know. Or at least, that they do not know the whole truth. In the event that my father is angry about something else… if you waited until Borsche got word to you, before approaching your father… if mine do not know of us, we could wait one more day, one more night, before telling them. We could sign the Peace Accord, then stand before them, together, already united, and under the banner of Peace."

He stopped, his eyes locked on hers. 

Ayleth found it suddenly difficult to breathe, and she could not say why.

His plan made sense. It was wise not to create conflict if it did not already exist. And yet, something within her recoiled at the idea of even one more day of hiding. 

***** 

ETAN

Her fingers tightened on his chest and her brows puckered. She was against the idea, but thinking it through. 

Light, he loved her. "Ayleth," he started, "I know it feels awful—"

"No, you are right. The plan makes sense. Especially if by some miracle they do not already know, but… Etan I cannot deny there is something within me that says we must face this together, at every moment."

"I want to do that, too. But can you see the risks?"

"Yes. As I said, your plan makes logical sense. I… I do not know why I feel so strongly against it."

He smiled and hugged her close, tucking her head under his chin. "I want to spit at the idea as well," he murmured, stroking her back. "I am trying to make the wisest decision, rather than the one I like the best."

But she pulled away a moment later to look at him. "Etan, do you believe that the gods, at times, give us warnings? Teach us? Things we cannot know?"

"Yes. More than believe. I know the Father breathes wisdom and insight to me."

She nodded. "Then… do you not think we should listen to this… instinct?"

He frowned. "I struggle to be certain my adversity to this comes from God, that's the plain truth. I don't wish to be parted from you, Ayleth. There is risk at every side in this, and I do not wish to put you under anyone else's eyes—I don't want to trust your protection to anyone, not even Falek. But I know I must. That I cannot do everything myself is… it grates on me. But that does not mean it is not right to do. Sometimes our instincts are driven by selfish reasons. Sometimes by love. And sometimes by God. It is the discerning between them that is difficult."

She sighed. "You are right, of course. I simply cannot shake this ill feeling. As if… as if our separation can only end in disaster." She looked up at him, her eyes deep pools of blue, shining—and tense. He stroked her cheek with his thumb. 

"Every moment parted from you has felt that way to me since we met," he said honestly. "Those days when I was forced to allow other men to put their hands on you, to tempt you… it felt like an offense to my soul."

"Mine as well."

"But we did it. And it did not end in disaster, love. It brought us here."

She nodded, but he could see the shadow of fear in her gaze. 

"Ayleth, do you—"

A low knock on the door startled them both. 

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