Chapter 72 - 71: Approval Of The Past

Chapter 72: Chapter 71: Approval Of The Past

"I quit, I F*CKING QUIT!" Ricky's scream tore through the air, a raw, visceral outburst that echoed the turmoil within him.

The scene before him had struck a chord deeper than anything he had ever felt, pushing his emotions to their breaking point.

"I DON'T WANT TO BE THE STUPID BLACK KNIGHT ANYMORE! ERNST WINS, SO LET ME THE F*CK OUT OF HERE!" Ricky screamed, his voice trembling with desperation, but no matter how fiercely he wished for an escape, the scene refused to change.

"Alright, it's a promise." Danielle offered a sad, knowing smile as Ricky covered his eyes, struggling to hold back his emotions.

The little girl, sitting on her neatly made bed, was his long-lost half-sister Danielle, now just a haunting memory.

This was one of the most painful fragments of his past he had always refused to face, desperately burying any recollection of her.

But as he turned to escape, he found himself thrown into another scene.

"Ricky, can we play go-fish-"

"I can't Danielle, I'm going out with friends, next time I promise." Ricky waved her off and walked out through the door, but the present-day Ricky suddenly jerked his head to the side, as if trying to escape the memory unfolding before him.

"Alright, it's a promise." Danielle reappeared, her sad smile lingering as she slowly lowered her head, the door closing in front of her with a quiet finality.

Ricky stumbled backward, turning just in time to see Danielle rushing forward, clutching something tightly to her chest while his past self descended the stairs.

"Hey Ricky, I found this really cool movie-" Danielle, her eyes sparkling like stars, held it above her head with a toothy smile, brimming with hope.

But his past self only sighed, letting her excitement fade into the silence as he walked towards the door.

"Nope, busy. Promise I'll play next time." Ricky waved her off once more, closing the door behind him.

"Alright, it's a promise." Danielle slowly lowered the movie in her hand, her smile fading as she watched the door swing shut in her face once more.

That same understanding, sad smile crept back onto her face, yet the past Ricky didn't even care to spare her a glance.

"Hey Ricky, do you want to play hopscotch?"

"Hey Ricky, let's just talk-"

"Hey Ricky, I found dad's old board games-"

"Hey Ricky-"

"Hey Ricky-"

"Hey Ricky-"

"Hey Ricky-"

"Hey Ricky-"

Every direction Ricky looked, he was met with scenes of neglect, the words echoing relentlessly around him.

Danielle's attempts to reach out continued, each time met with his turning away, until Ricky finally stopped moving, unable to escape the haunting repetition and finally gazed forward.

"Ricky, is it true what Daddy said before he went away?" Danielle tugged at Ricky's shirt, her voice trembling with uncertainty before he could walk out.

"Who cares about that loser anyway? Just forget about him." Ricky said dismissively, brushing her off but Danielle fidgeted with her fingers, her gaze downcast, as he walked out the door.

"But he said I wasn't his daughter." Danielle's words struck his past self like a tidal wave, freezing him in place at the doorway. In the present, his face flushed with sudden, seething anger.

"Don't you say it, don't you f*cking say it-" Ricky ground his teeth together, pointing an accusing finger at his past self.

"Yeah, you're not his daughter, so just stop thinking about him, alright?" Ricky tried to push her to move on in his own way, but his words only left Danielle devastated.

*Sniff*

"I'm not?" Danielle sniffed, her eyes filling with tears as the past version of Ricky hesitated at the door, visibly unsettled by her response.

"Y-Yes." Ricky's voice wavered with guilt as he delivered the painful news, while Danielle tugged at his shirt once more, her eyes pleading.

"Can you stay with me today?" Danielle asked, her voice quivering with tears threatening to fall as the present Ricky's heart shattered into tiny pieces, already knowing the answer.

"N-No, I've got to go." Ricky fled through the door, escaping from the problem he had created as he left Danielle standing alone, her sadness deepening in his wake.

He stood there, his face etched with heartbreak, as he watched Danielle's tears fall slowly.

Finally, he sank into a nearby chair, his face buried in his hands as he succumbed to his own anguish.

"What is wrong with me?" Ricky asked himself, his voice heavy with despair, as he confronted the reflection of his own flaws.

It was a moment of reckoning, forcing him to finally face the music and after taking a deep breath, he looked up, only to find that the scene had shifted.

"Ricky!" Danielle rushed to his side as he collapsed onto the floor, clearly having drunk himself into a state of numbness.

"Shut up~" Ricky muttered through a drunken slur before slamming face-first into the ground.

*BAM*

"RICKY!" Danielle cried out urgently, running to his side and tapping his cheek with tearful eyes but he was too far gone to stir.

Alone with only each other for company, Danielle began to push and struggle to carry Ricky up to his bed on the second floor.

She employed every method and contraption she could think of, her determination unwavering.

The present Ricky watched in heartache as his younger sister exhausted every effort to ensure he had a restful night, a gesture he would never fully appreciate.

Then as Ricky started to feel that remorse and guilt completely consumed him, the final scene played out as Ricky fell to his knees as he no longer had the strength to stand.

"Please, Ricky, can we go play at the docks?" Danielle begged earnestly but Ricky, already in a foul mood, shook his head in response.

"I'm not in the mood-"

"YOU'RE NEVER IN THE MOOD!" Danielle screeched at Ricky, tears streaming down her face as her frustration and hurt spilled over.

"I ONLY WANT YOU TO SPEND TIME WITH ME BUT YOU NEVER-" Danielle poured out her frustrations, hoping Ricky would notice her sadness but his past self merely snapped his head back, indifferent to her pain.

"WHY SHOULD I SPEND TIME WITH SOME SNOT-NOSED BRAT?" The past Ricky retaliated harshly, causing Danielle to flinch.

Meanwhile, the present Ricky shook his head in disbelief, unable to reconcile with his former self's cruelty.

"Stop." Ricky begged desperately, reaching out to anyone who might hear him, but his cries were met with silence.

But it was no use.

"But I'm your sister-"

"HALF SISTER, YOU'RE ONLY HALF MY SISTER CAUSE YOU'RE A F*CKING BASTARD!" The past Ricky yelled, and as his harsh words cut through the air, tears began to stream down Danielle's cheeks.

"Stop." Ricky breathlessly uttered the words toward his past self, knowing full well what would follow as avein throbbed on his neck as he glared at his former self with seething hatred.

"Y-Your lying-" Danielle shook her head, tears streaming down her small cheeks as she backed away, overwhelmed by the sudden news.

"WHY DO YOU THINK DAD SAID YOU WEREN'T HIS? BECAUSE HE HUNG HIMSELF WHEN HE FOUND OUT OUR MOM CHEATED AND HAD A KID WITH ANOTHER MAN!" Ricky unleashed his frustrations on his young sister, who only ever wanted to spend time with him.

*SNIFF*

"I-I HATE YOU!" Danielle screamed at his past self, but he only scoffed as he opened the door and walked away.

"STOP!" Ricky shouted, standing up in a desperate plea to his past self.

It would be a moment he would come to regret deeply, a haunting memory that lingered with him to this day.

"And I hate you too." Ricky said in a bitter, pessimistic tone, intending to wound Danielle deeply as his words succeeded, shattering her heart completely.

"FINE!" Danielle yelled, her voice echoing with anguish as she watched his past self walk away.

The present Ricky, consumed by remorse, began shaking his head fervently, unable to escape the torment of his own actions.

"Danielle, stop." Ricky breathlessly stumbled forward, watching as Danielle reached for her yellow rain jacket and paper boat, her small hands trembling with despair.

"I'LL GO BY MYSELF!" Danielle yelled defiantly, but his past self didn't even glance back.

Meanwhile, the present Ricky sprinted towards her, driven by a desperate need to stop her.

"DANIELLE, PUT THAT F*CKING RAINCOAT DOWN, DANIELLE!" Ricky roared in grief, sprinting after her as she headed towards the back door.

She struggled for a moment but finally managed to open the door, and the rain poured in torrents as Ricky's heart pounded furiously.

"What am I talking about? I'm talking about how your mother whored herself out to other men and had their bastards, that's what I'm talking about," Tanner said, leaning back on the ledge as the younger Ricky flinched at the harsh words.

"What are you-"

"I found out that Danielle isn't mine, Slick. She's not my daughter," Tanner scoffed with disdain, gazing towards the side as the younger Ricky looked on in shock, unable to process the revelation.

"I was surprised when I learned that you're actually my boy," Tanner said, taking out a flask and taking a swig, wiping his mouth and then pointing it at him.

"You're nothing like me, you look and act just like your whore of a mother." Tanner continued to belittle Ricky over and over, his words slicing through the air as the younger Ricky stood there, stunned and unable to grasp the cruel reality being thrown at him.

"I should've never met her in Sicily, she ruined my life." Tanner said in a cynical way, throwing the flask to the side, his gaze returning to him

"You ruined my life." Tanner's voice was firm in that stance, believing it wholly as he pointed the blame at the younger Ricky who took a step back.

"She used me for that damn green card, just like how you use women to distract yourself from your own loneliness," Tanner sneered, letting out a hateful laugh while the present Ricky watched, scowling from the side.

"But we can rectify that horrible part of you, salvage the goodness I know you still have within you," Tanner said with a gentle tone, smiling as he grabbed two ropes and held one out to Ricky.

"Come on, let's stick it to her together, like father and son," Tanner said warmly, holding the ropes out only for the younger Ricky to look on in horror at the suggestion.

Without hesitation, the younger Ricky turned his back and ran, not sparing his father a single glance as he fled down the stairs and out the door, driven by a desperate need to escape.

"And after that, you never stopped running from your problems, right, Slick?" Tanner said, finally turning to face the current Ricky as he halted his movements, locking eyes with his father.

"Yeah, you really f*cked me up-"

"Oh Jesus Christ, Ricky, how about you take some accountability for once and admit that I wasn't the entire problem but your inability to face your problems head-on." Tanner scoffed, wrapping the noose around his neck and tying the rope to the side of the building.

"Fine, you can blame me for running away today, but what about when you ran away from your own bastards?" Tanner egged Ricky on, his words driving Ricky to grit his teeth.

"Or what about Cindy?" Tanner raised his gaze, Ricky's eyes turning dangerous when looking at the bastard before him.

"You better watch your mouth old man." Ricky threatened, his hate shining through his eyes as they glared at Tanner.

"How about Daneille-"

"I said shut your f*cking mouth, Tanner!" Ricky yelled out his hate filled words, but Tanner responded with a cruel laugh, his amusement cutting through Ricky's anger.

"How can you act all tough when you can't even take a step forward?" Tanner taunted, pointing at Ricky as he glanced down, realizing he hadn't moved an inch.

"Because-"

"Oh boy, here we go with your classic diversion," Tanner sighed, rolling his eyes while Ricky clenched his fist in response, the silence thickening between them.

"Nothing?" Tanner asked, surprised as Ricky ducked his head, letting out a chuckle filled with disdain.

"Alright, you're free to go," Tanner said, pointing as a door suddenly appeared behind Ricky as he turned around to see it.

"What are you-"

"You passed. I mean, you made it to the end, so you should be able to leave." Tanner said with a smile that was laced with disdain, watching Ricky turn towards the door.

"Let's save us both the awkwardness and just leave," Tanner said, beckoning him away, watching Ricky grasp the handle and turn it.

"Just run away like you always do." Tanner said, the words halting Ricky in his tracks.

"Oh?" Tanner remarked as Ricky's hand shook violently, the handle beginning to crush under his grip.

"You think I like being this way? You think I enjoy hurting everyone around me-" Ricky began, turning back around, but Tanner's laugh interrupted him once more.

"You know what, I think you do Ricky." Tanner spread out his arms, revealing his truth to him.

"I think it's your favorite excuse." Tanner said, his mocking tone silencing Ricky as the reaction only widened his bastard father's grin.

"I think you enjoy the thought of never taking responsibility for your actions after you mess everything up, get drunk, and go f*ck some whore. I think you love it!" Tanner exclaimed out, laughing heartily at his poor excuse of a son.

"That's your true love, Ricky. Never taking any accountability and blaming everyone else except yourself," Tanner concluded, gesturing toward him as if summarizing his final point with a glorious conclusion.

""Ha, I guess you're right." Ricky said, letting out a self-deprecating laugh, actually agreeing with him.

"I guess I have been that guy," Ricky admitted, his voice heavy with resignation, holding his forehead with that stupid smile of his.

"A part of me just wants to do it right because, well, it's the easy route. I mean, the door is right there." Ricky gestured to the door with a short laugh, and Tanner responded with a mocking smile.

"But f*ck that." Ricky said, surprising both himself and Tanner as he took a step forward instead of retreating.

"I'm tired, I'm worn out, and I'm sick of just doing nothing, being nothing!" Ricky yelled at Tanner, causing his father to stand up and take a step back.

"Are you finally gonna join me-"

"No, I don't want to be this guy anymore! AND YOU KNOW WHAT, I'M GOING TO DO WHAT I SHOULD'VE DONE THE FIRST F*CKING TIME I SAW YOU ON THIS GODDAMN LEDGE!" Ricky roared, rushing at the man who, in his mind, had long since ceased to be his father.

"What are you-" Tanner started, but he couldn't finish as Ricky grabbed his collar, yanked him off the ledge, and threw him down to the ground.

*BAM*

*BAM*

Ricky began pounding on Tanner, delivering punch after punch as the man tried to shield his face and despite Tanner's attempts to cover up, Ricky's fists relentlessly collided with his face.

"STOP-"

*BAM*

"I'M YOUR FATHER-"

"NO, YOU'RE JUST A LOUSY EXCUSE FOR A MAN!" Ricky yelled, pummeling his fist into Tanner's face.

Blood started to splatter on his being but Ricky was firm, letting out all his deep rooted anger and resent that had haunted him throughout his life.

Ricky's downward spiral reached a crucial point here, where he ceased to grow as a person and began to shatter throughout his life.

Though some things would remain unchanged, Ricky resolved to confront the part of himself that always ran, determined to rid himself of the feelings that had plagued him for so long.

It was his way of breaking the cycle, refusing to let the weight of his past dictate his future any longer.

Standing over his beaten father, Ricky felt a profound sense of peace for the first time in what felt like centuries and as he stood there, a door materialized before him.

*Huff*

*Huff*

"You know, a part of me still thinks that all of this isn't my fault, that I didn't lead myself to this very spot." Ricky huffed, standing over Tanner with a resolute look, wiping the blood off of his fists.

"But the real answer is that it is."

"It's my fault that I'm an idiot, it's my fault that I'm a coward, and it's my fault that I act the way I do," Ricky admitted, his voice steady and finally acknowledging that he is the problem, instead of blaming everything around him.

"But I don't want to be this person anymore, I don't want to be this weak of a man, I want to be different." Ricky declared with a firm resolve, kicking Tanner in the chin one more time and turning his back to him.

"I want to be better."

A light shone through the door, and Ricky, drawn by its warmth, instinctively walked toward it and as he approached, the warmth began to fill his barren heart once more.

"ARE YOU JUST GOING TO LEAVE? TURN YOUR BACK ON ALL OF US?" Tanner screeched at Ricky who turned back to see every person he had ever wronged, their faces a mosaic of guilt, anger, sadness, smiles, and acceptance.

Until his gaze finally settled on Danielle, who waved at him with a gentle, encouraging smile.

"I'm not turning my back on you," Ricky said with a smile, his eyes fixed on his new beginning.

"I'm just moving forward, that's all." Ricky scoffed at the pitiful excuse for a father, taking his first step of liberation and as he did, the people around him began to fade into obscurity, except for one.

Danielle watched with a smile as Ricky was enveloped in a warm, life-like glow and as the light surrounded him, her entire body began to fade away.

"Goodbye, Ricky." Danielle said, having finally achieved her last wish.

As her form slowly started to fade, Ricky didn't walk forward completely; instead, he slightly turned his head, catching the last glimpse of her farewell.

"Goodbye? That means I won't ever see you again, and that's not happening, Danielle." Ricky side-eyed the shocked Danielle, who could only laugh through her tears as they streamed down her cheeks.

"I can't play today, but next time, you have to promise to play whatever I want!" Danielle shouted at the top of her lungs as her form began to slowly trickle away into nothingness.

Ricky rubbed his eyes, stepping fully into the light, leaving her final words echoing in the space behind him.

"Alright, it's a promise."