Chapter 16 - Longing

Name:Matabar Author:


Ardi was lying on the furs and listening to the voices coming up from below. He no longer needed a glass or the old ventilation shaft, which had once been a refuge for spiders. But unlike before, the hunter had no idea what his feelings were. Was it sadness at the fact that only one of the two voices was familiar, or anger caused by this familiar voice talking to someone else?

"How did it go?" Shaia asked, placing a plate on the table, her voice slightly breathless.

Now, with his eyes closed, Ardi could almost see what was happening two floors below him, guided by the scents, sounds and subtle sensations that reached him.

"Do you want the truth or a lie?" Kelly unfastened his holster and hung it over the back of a chair.

Shaia sighed and sat down opposite him. Ardi, eyes open now, looked out the window. The stars were already lighting up the sky, and in the distance, above the towering peaks of the Alсade, eagles soared, drawn to the endless reaches of the black expanse. Proud and free, they glided among the clouds, hunting unsuspecting prey. Any moment now, their talons would seize the scruff of a mountain goat, hurling it off a cliff, only to then tear into its tenderized flesh and broken bones with sharp beaks.

Ardi felt like that goat.

But he couldn’t fall. He kept trying to cling to something, anything, but nothing held. And something inside him itched, as if once, deep down in his core, he had been whole and strong like a young oak, but now... Now he was being gnawed away by insects, leaving tiny, aching holes in his very soul.

"I’d rather hear the truth," Shaia said as she moved to the stove, removed the kettle, and poured fragrant tea into a cup.

"The truth..." Kelly repeated. "If this had happened five years ago, nobody would have said a word. But after they finished the railroad to Delpas, and the workers from Blue Lake poured in... Well, you know how Evergale has grown in the last five years. I used to manage on my own, but now I have four deputies, and even that’s not enough. And I-"

"Dear," Shaia interrupted him, and Ardi’s heart skipped a beat.

Tears scalded his cheeks. He’d remembered what that salty, hot moisture was called, but by the Sleeping Spirits, he wished he could forget.

"The mayor is not against it," the sheriff got to the point. "And how could he be, when his own son was one of those Hector saved? As were many others’ children. But those who came from the south, especially the miners from Delpas... We’re not in Metropolis, honey. And we’re not on the border of N’gia... People here have only seen the Firstborn in pictures, if at all. To them..."

"To them, other races are no different than demons," Shaia nodded and turned to the window, her chair creaking slightly, her dress rustling.

"May the Face of Light forgive us," Kelly said quietly, taking a sip of the brew. During the whole day that Ardi had spent in the attic, he hadn’t once smelled alcohol in the house. That damned sheriff... why was he so difficult? "There was such an uproar at the meeting, you’d think I had suggested keeping their children in a room with a hungry beast."

They fell silent, sitting quietly and drinking their tea. Only Shaia stood occasionally, pacing nervously in front of the cupboards before sitting down again, then she would stand up once more to do it all over again.

"It almost came to a fist fight," Kelly continued. "Locals against the newcomers, if you can call them that, considering the fact that even the newest settlers have been here for a year and a half."

"And what about the pastor?"

"Tangisiy? What about him... He’s as green as they come. I don’t think he’s even twenty. And a foreigner, at that, from Holy Throne Uldjingood. Straight from Arma."

"I remember."

"Ah, yes. Sorry..."

Silence again.

"A missionary, damn him..." Kelly mumbled a few more words, but Ardi couldn’t make them out. "He’s pretty open and tolerant, honestly. Like all of them over there are. So, he was on our side. Said every savage should be given a chance to come to the Light and-"

"Ardi is not a savage!" Shaia couldn’t hold back and slammed the closet door.

"You’ll wake Kena and Erti... I just put them to sleep."

Silence again. This time, it was heavy, stone-like, pulling everything down.

"I’m sorry," Shaia whispered, her voice breaking into a barely audible sob. "I just don’t know what to do. I really don’t..."

"The mayor is on our side, sweetheart. As are all the people with any influence in this town. As for those grumbling miners... a few nights in a cell will cool even the hottest heads. The rest will make a fuss, and then it’ll all get buried under the daily grind."

"But what if they try to hurt Ardi?"

"A minor?" Kelly was clearly surprised. He even put down his fork in shock. "Well, then I’ll be happy to put up a noose and deal with them according to Imperial Law."

"I’m not talking about the adults, Kelly. I’m talking about their children."

"I wouldn’t worry about that," Kelly said, rubbing his upper lip where a plaster could still be seen. "I’d be more concerned about the safety of anyone who tries to mess with your eldest son than about him."

"But he’s just a child..."

These words burned Ardi like fire. He wasn’t a child. There was no need to worry about him. He didn’t need to be cared for. No. He was the one who should worry about his pack. Caring for them. Hunting. Choosing the best lands for their den. Walking the hunters’ paths among his equals. And...

Ardi glanced out the window again. There loomed the peaks of the Alсade. So familiar and so dear to him. Where he knew every slope, every river bend, every lake and stream.

The hunter didn’t even notice that he’d opened the window and, without making a sound, leaped down. He landed lightly, springing and rolling, then stretched to his full height and breathed in the cold night air. It was coming in from the north, telling Ardi a thousand stories of forest streams and mountain trails.

Erti had obviously brought these from the kitchen himself, judging by the fact that Kelly and Shaia’s voices had faded somewhere in their bedroom.

"I thought you might be hungry," the child said with a hint of fear in his voice. He looked around and, finding no place to put the tray, set it down on the floor. "I brought you some food from the kitchen. But don’t worry! If Mom and Dad get mad, I’ll tell them it was all my idea!"

Ardi suppressed a smile — he had noticed that his and his grandfather’s fangs could frighten people.

He took a step toward the offering, and Erti flinched, nearly tumbling down the stairs. With a few quick moves, Ardi darted across the attic and caught his brother before anything could go wrong.

The child barely had time to register what had happened.

"Wow," was all he said as he was brought back to his feet. "How did you... so fast... Well, really fast."

Erti was clearly struggling to find the right words, constantly looking away.

"I’m sorry I hit you," he blurted out suddenly, as if he’d remembered something very important. "It didn’t hurt too much, did it?"

"No pain," Ardi shook his head and sat down on the floor next to the tray. "Matabar skin hard. Mine softer. But tougher than human. Heal fast. Hurt little."

Relief was evident on his brother’s face, and after standing around a bit longer, he sat down beside him. Without hesitation, Ardi carefully took the cup of sweet, viscous drink. Or at least he thought he was being careful, but it almost slipped from his clumsy grip, forcing him to clench his teeth around the rim, nearly cracking the clay material. Ardi froze, waiting for his brother to react with fear, but Erti only laughed, then quickly stifled the sound.

Ardi sighed, took a sip of the drink and, eyes wide with surprise, emptied the mug in one swift motion, even licking the bottom of it afterwards.

"I knew you’d like it! It’s cocoa! I love it!" Erti exclaimed happily, then sadly added, "But it’s better when it’s hot, except I don’t know how to turn on the stove."

"Cocoa," Ardi repeated, holding out his hand.

His brother tensed but didn’t flinch. Erti was no coward, and was maybe even braver than Ardi himself. At least, when Ardi ruffled his brother’s hair the same way his own had been ruffled not too long ago, he didn’t detect any scent of fear from him. Only tension.

"Thank you," Ardi said and took a bite of the bread, struggling a bit despite his fangs.

Erti watched him with a pure, genuine smile. Then he suddenly became shy.

"You’re not going to leave again, are you?"

Ardi froze.

"I heard what Dad said, but that’s just nonsense! What does it mean, they don’t like you living with us?" Erti clenched his little pink fists. Had Ardi really been that tiny once? "I’ll go to school in the fall, too, and I’ll protect you. I won’t let anyone hurt you!"

He turned to Ardi and looked at him with a look... a look that was perhaps similar to the way Ardi had once looked at his own father.

"Just don’t go, okay?" He whispered. "I just feel like you want to go. But don’t go... When you came, I suddenly felt so calm... and I know I won’t have nightmares anymore... But don’t stay just because of that. Just stay. Even for a little while. We are..."

The longer Erti spoke, the more his eyes filled with tears, his nose ran with snot, and his words became less coherent. At one point, Ardi put an arm around his brother’s shoulders and pulled him close.

"You my brother," he said, feeling a lump forming in his throat. "One tribe. One land. I be by you side. Not worry. I guard you against nightmare. I chase away fear."

"You won’t leave?" Erti repeated.

"No one but you can take care of Shaia and Ertan."

Ardi shook his head.

"I not."

Erti nodded and laid his head on Ardi’s shoulder.

"Can I stay with you tonight? I won’t be any trouble. I’ll just sleep next to you, okay?"

Ardi held his brother close and remembered Ergar’s lessons. He’d used to think that being an adult hunter meant making his own decisions. When to sleep. When to eat. What to do. But now, holding this small cub, unable to survive on its own in the human world, let alone in the Alсade, Ardi understood what it really meant to be an adult hunter.

And he had almost made a mistake that would have betrayed everything his friends and mentors had taught him. He was responsible for his own. For his brother, even if he called another man "father;" for his mother, even if she shared her bed and roof with that same man.

It didn’t change the fact that he had to take care of them.

Such was the law of the hunt.

"I’ll always be by your side, little brother," Ardi whispered in the Fae language, though Erti was already asleep and likely didn’t hear a thing. "Forgive me for almost losing my courage."

He finished the bread, lifted Erti into his arms with some effort, and grunted as he carried him over to the furs, making sure he was comfortable and warm before lying down beside him. Well, it seemed like more adventures were waiting for him, damn it. He could only hope that this time he wouldn’t have to fight a troll.