Chapter 459: Don’t Always Think That Everything You Do Is for the Good of the Cat. At Least Learn to Put Yourself in Their Shoes, Right?
Maybe a Fake Gintama Chapter 459 Don't Always Think That Everything You Do Is for the Good of the Cat. At Least Learn to Put Yourself in Their Shoes, Right?
In Kabukicho Park at night, Gintoki was squatting on a small stone structure not far from the swing, looking at the bright moon in the sky, while Kondo and Katsura were sleeping soundly on the ground.
"Ah, I'm so hungry I can't sleep," Gintoki sighed and muttered to himself with some frustration, "How long am I going to have to live like this? When will I turn back to normal? Shinpachi... Kagura... Wonder how they're doing?"
"Hey, eat." Kawaki, who was holding a shopping bag, jumped up and placed the shopping bag next to Gintoki.
"I thought I would never see you again, but you are really amazing to be able to run out of that cage." Gintoki glanced at Kawaki, then stuck his head into the shopping bag and began to eat.
"Ah, don't worry about that. No place in this world can completely trap me. Even if I am really trapped, I just need to keep breaking the walls."
Kawaki licked his paws and said disapprovingly, "In the past few days, I have been thinking about the reason why we became cats. Is it really just because the cats buried below want to punish us? Now it seems that it is not."
"Did you find any clues?" Gintoki asked while eating.
"No, I just have a little clue," Kawaki shook his head and looked at the bright full moon in the sky, "I originally thought this was a punishment, a punishment for turning a blind eye to the begging of stray cats on the roadside and not caring about their lives, but it seems not to be the case now."
"This is the reason why I brought food to the stray cats every time during this period of time. But so many days have passed, and it has no effect at all. So I think, if we really become like this because of the buried cat under the small grave, then what exactly do they want us to do?"
"Will we be able to return to normal after completing their wishes?" Gintoki asked, "Indeed, it seems that this possibility is the most likely now. But the problem is, what is their wish?"
"I can already be sure of this," Kawaki turned his head and looked at Gintoki with a serious expression, "But I can't do that kind of thing with my own strength, so I need your help!"
"Although asking "what kind of wish" can make the topic continue according to the trend just now..." Gintoki replied with a look of disdain, "But I really doubt the possibility of your brain coming up with it."
"It can't be wrong," Kawaki shook his head and looked into the distance, "Based on what I saw and heard when I became a cat in the past few days, and today's day of overt and covert investigation, I have already confirmed it."
"What is that?" Gintoki asked casually.
"Gintoki, you should have noticed it as well, right?" Kawaki continued with a serious expression, "There is a huge disparity in the number of male and female wild cats here. There may not be even one female cat among a hundred male cats. So I think, perhaps for this reason, those cats who did not enjoy being able to have s*x until they died conveyed this resentment of virginity to death to us, which led to us becoming this."
"Normally, I would definitely retort at this time, but I don't know why, but today, I actually feel that it makes sense..." Gintoki sighed, "Maybe it really does make sense."
"Let's go!" Kawaki stared into Gintoki's eyes with a serious face.
"What?" Gintoki answered impatiently with a sad face.
"Of course, we are going to build a Fuzokuten(Brothel) that only belongs to cats in the world of stray cats!" Kawaki replied seriously, "I have already drawn up a plan. The first step is, starting today, we will gather all the female cats in Edo who are willing to do that kind of business, and then train them! The training is left to you, I believe in you! Then, the second step is to set a suitable price for business! At the same time, to prevent unfair competition, a regulatory mechanism must be established. It was like the Industrial and Commercial Bureau in the human world. This kind of thing is left to the gorilla and Zura. The third step, our bodies automatically return to normal!"
"Your understanding is the most ridiculous!" Houichi shouted angrily.
"Huh? So if you aren't Doraemon, then what?" Gintoki asked doubtfully, and then suddenly thought of something. He looked at Houichi with a surprised face and said incoherently, "Could it be that you're Pa-Pa-Pa Meow?"
"It's Perman!" Houichi was a little mad and complained, "Don't change it slightly! Not even close! Okay, maybe the chimpanzee, Perman No. 2!"
(Perman: The same author as Doraemon, and was created earlier than Doraemon. In addition, Perman No. 2 is a chimpanzee.)
"H-Hey, you've gotta be kidding." Gintoki looked at Houichi with sweat all over his face. He stood with his legs, and his two front paws held his head in panic. He stuttered, "Then you... Why... Why is Lord Frieza here?!"
"My forehead's the only thing that's even close!" At the same time as he roared, the veins on Houichi's forehead popped out as he heavily smashed into Gintoki's forehead.
After a loud bang, a large bump appeared on Gintoki's forehead.
"Do you still not understand? I was once a human like you." Houichi looked up at the night sky in the distance once again and slowly spoke.
"...Eh? Eh-----?!" After a moment of being stunned, Gintoki stood up in shock and pointed at Houichi in shock, "So you are not Lord Frieza's final form?!"
"That's what you're surprised about?!" Houichi rolled his eyes and retorted.
Kawaki snorted softly and sighed, "Ah, I didn't expect to hear something amazing again. It's really surprising..."
"Hold on! You've been the boss cat around here for many years, right?" Gintoki suddenly thought of something. He looked at Houichi with a face full of sweat. His ears trembled unconsciously, and several black lines appeared in the corners of his eyes. He asked tentatively, "How many years... How many years have you been a cat?"
Hearing this, Kawaki also reacted, his face instantly changed, and then his eyes twitched and he mechanically slowly turned his head to look at Houichi.
"...I turned into a cat thirteen years ago." Houichi slowly replied.
In an instant, Kawaki and Gintoki spat out a mouthful of blood and fell to the ground at the same time.
"So like I said, you can no longer go back," Houichi continued unhurriedly, "Well, your curse is probably different from mine."
"In other words, I can only use my two paws when playing games in the future?" Kawaki, who was lying in a pool of blood, said hopelessly.
"Is this all you care about?!" Gintoki's eyes were white as he cursed wildly. Then, he sat up again and looked at Houichi, "You've already given up on turning back into a human?"
"That is a sin that I can not escape and must bear."
Houichi slowly said, "I was a lousy bastard even before I became a cat. No different from what I am now. A despicable man who twisted arms and used force to get what he wanted..."