Chapter 65 - 65 - If Only

Jayden POV

When I went home, Peggy and Caden weren't there anymore. I walked directly to Caden's bedroom, looked around and sighed. Then I went to our bedroom. Not a single sign of Peggy was left. Her clothes, bags, shoes and even her scent weren't there anymore.

I felt my heart was tearing me apart. It was painful. If only I didn't let my hatred consume me, maybe they're still here. If only I hadn't hurt her from the day I found them, maybe everything would have turned out differently.

If only I didn't let Amanda get close to me, she wouldn't think of seducing me. If only I told Amanda that I couldn't really love her, she wouldn't hope that I could return her feelings. If only I had shown Peggy how much I still love her instead of telling her how much I hated her, she wouldn't agree with Kyle. If only I paid more attention to her three years ago, she wouldn't have left me.

I was so conceited and full of myself back then. I thought I was doing everything for her. That I understood her. But thinking about it, what I did wasn't enough. I should have talked to her more about her family.

Relationships are not all about sex or making love, it's not just telling your partner I love you. There's more to it. Love, trust, understanding, unselfishness, contentment and appreciation are some traits for the relationship to work. 

I was a teenager when I met her. I thought it was just a temporary admiration. I was curious about her. A girl who had different boyfriends every week but still no experience with adult stuff. She has never been kissed or even just a simple gesture like holding hands, she knew nothing about it.

At first I wanted to take all of her first but I never thought that I would fall in love with her. I was a playboy and I treat women like nothing. For me, they were just people whom you could have sex with.

But Peggy was different. She was kind, understanding and unselfish. I enjoyed being with her. Every time I see her I feel safe and my heart feels light. I was happy. I couldn't imagine myself with another woman.

When she left, I was disappointed, frustrated and angry. It wasn't really because of her. When I found out the reason she left, I felt like my world crumbled. I hated myself for hating her.

She was still thinking about me, her love was unconditional. She sacrificed her happiness for me. But I couldn't accept the fact that she left me. I thought about my pride instead of my feelings for her. I was stupid and an idiot. I tried to kill myself because I couldn't face her. The possibility of his father killing my mother and that I might hurt her if that was true, I couldn't really accept that.

Peggy was stronger than me. She decided to leave and took care of our son without me. While I was in the arms of different women, Caden was crying in her arms. I imagined her carrying him for months and giving birth to our son alone. Those sleepless nights taking care of the baby and working in the morning so they could survive. She never used a single cent from her bank account. She worked hard for three years. While I was cursing her, she was working her ass to give Caden everything he needs. 

I'm stupid for hurting the most wonderful and amazing woman in the world. I didn't realize tears fell from my eyes. Ah fuck! Now, I regret everything I told and did to her. I wanted to go to Flousia but I need proof that nothing really happened to me and Amanda.

I heard a few knocks and a little girl came in. It was Alira. She was looking at me intensely. Her eyes were like her mother's. Cold and distant. She walked towards me and handed her phone. I frowned.

"What is it Alira?" I asked, curiously. I don't really have time to play with her right now.

"Caden sent pictures. Look!" She said.

I took the phone and saw the photos Caden sent. I was happy to see him even if it's just pictures. I scrolled down and saw three photos of Peggy with a man. Who the fuck is this guy?

The first photo looks like they just met, they were shaking hands while smiling at each other. The second photo seems like they posed in front of the camera and the guy's arm was in Peggy's waist. Then the last photo was taken when the guy was kissing her hand.

A message was sent by Caden after the photos.

'Mommy met a guy today. I think he likes her. They will go on a date in three weeks.'

I frowned and looked at Alira. She was glaring at me.

"If Aunt Peggy and Caden won't come back here, I will never talk to you again Uncle Jayden." She said, snatching her phone then ran outside.

I clenched my teeth. I was beginning to get mad again but not to Peggy. I'm mad at myself. What am I doing? I need to act quickly or she might get taken by another guy.

"By the way, do you still have plans to marry Peggy?" Percy suddenly asked me when we were at the bar yesterday.

I took a deep breath before answering him.

"I do. I've been wanting to marry her since high school. You know that." I said while looking at them.

"Then why didn't you ask her properly? When you found them, instead of telling her how much you love her and that you wanted to be with her, you chose to hurt her and forced yourself on her. Kyle was too kind hearted to forgive you but if I was her brother, you will never see her again." Luke commented in a serious tone.

"I regret doing that to her but I don't know why every time I wanted to tell her how much I missed her, that I am still head over heels in love with her and that I want to marry her, different words will come out of my mouth."

"Because you're stupid, your pride would never take you anywhere. If you're like that, she might get tired of waiting for you and find another guy." Andrew smirked.

That conversation was happening so fast. Caden said she will go out with that guy. I won't accept her to be with another man. I took my phone and dialed Owen's number.

"I want the investigation to be done asap. I need the result of my lab test right now, call the testing center and see if they could expedite it."

Once I find out the truth, I will fly to Flousia and get my family back.