Chapter 375 - My SI Stash #75 - Proudly Fur Hire by Virgo with Cheer (YuGiOhGX)

-Dude is just stonks-ing his way thru GX~ Respectable/

Synopsis: Duel Monsters is a weird game, that for some reason transcends space and time in most any way that matters. So what happens when some random schmuck gets reincarnated into one of the worlds ruled by them? He does the sane thing, and gets a job. Cause money is money, and he's proudly fur hire.

Rated: M

Words: 14K

Posted on: fanfiction.net/s/13677041/1/Proudly-Fur-Hire-Yugioh-GX-Self-Insert (Virgo with Cheer)

PS: If you're not able to copy/paste the link, you have everything in here to find it, by simply searching the author and the story title. It sucks that you can't copy links on mobile (´ー｀)

-I'll be putting the chapter ones of all the fanfics/originals mentioned, to give you guys a sample if you wan't more please do go to the website and support the author! (And maybe even convince them to start uploading chapters in here as well!)

Chapter 1-3 (exceptional)

Reincarnation was a weird thing, in the fact that it was shockingly more common than you would expect, if not in the way most people can understand.

By this, I mean that it's not a static process, or even consistent with the idea that 'this used to be someone else'.

Some people were weirdly talented at things they usually shouldn't be, like math or music, some felt nostalgic towards things or places they've never seen or heard, some were split personality pharaohs and some got split into four different guys at the same time.

What I'm getting at is that souls are hella weird and that reincarnation was too unreliable to be called a science, but not reliable enough to be called magic either. I know this because I was obsessed with the stuff for most of my childhood, because I at least placed somewhere on that scale.

I...don't really know how much of my life I got through before really 'starting fresh' as it were. Or really becoming aware of it as a thing. That was the crazy thing about it all, when you know you were someone else, until you weren't. You were just you, in the end.

Once I pounded that into my head, things got a lot easier, at least in terms of personality. As a bright side to it, it made skipping grades a breeze, and you'd never seen a more confident 12 year old when you'd had 20 years of memories and ideals shoved in your skull.

It also helped that both lives weren't bad at all. The old one was a bit dull all things considered, but the 'you' then had done a pretty good job all things considered, and the new one was looking just as good. It was a bit weird not getting along with the kids around you at first, but you hit your stride, and anyone could be your friend on the internet forums. It also helped that you really had a bigger goal in mind.

Namely, getting rich as f.u.c.k, or at least moderately wealthy enough to survive and retire comfortably. Money was freedom after all, one very few ever really got around to attaining.

It was just a shame that most of the rest of the world seemed to be f.u.c.k.i.n.g stupid though. Why would I say this, you might ask, no-one in particular I'm explaining this to? Well, frankly, it's because this stupid world runs off a card game. To be more specific, Duel Monsters. When I actually understood this for the first time as something unusual, I...well, I didn't flip out, but it took me a few days of quiet contemplation before I really got my mind around it.

Granted, it wasn't THAT bad, they still did things like elections and everything else, normal people went about their daily lives and progress marched on for the majority, but when you could whip out a deck of cards for the right to avoid being fired or use it as incentive to show you're a good candidate, well, somethings f.u.c.k.i.e.d up. It also didn't help my opinion much that I knew from both outsider knowledge and publicly available information that the fate of the world seemed to hinge on said card games every few years or so. Which was...just fantastic.

So I decided to do what any reasonable guy in my situation would. I googled a ritual online and 'bribed' the shit out of some Duel Spirits so I could get some decent deterrents should I need to. well, deck a bitch. Obviously it didn't work, but I kept trying, using all the things my grubby little hands could get with my free time with my family out.

Fruits and stones trying to get Naturia anythings, pieces of armors for Samurai's, Superheavy or regular, even a new tablet for some kind of anything but Machine King. Needless to say, I asked for a lot of weird things for my birthdays, and I may never live down the looks the rest of the family give me to this day. Eventually, desperately, I used the method I should have done from the smart.

I threw money at it. Didn't even mean to, I was just super desperate at that point and pretty much throwing a tantrum of anything in reach at the stupid f.u.c.k.i.n.g, maybe-real-more-likely-fake-circle, until I got to my wallet filled with walking around cash. I won't lie, I nearly had a heart attack when it got grabbed by a cat the size of me with a flaming sword on his back and dollar signs for eyes. Not even kidding with that last bit either, I saw them shining in his pupils.

From there, I began a beautiful, and more importantly profitable!, relationship with the Fur Hires. Mercenaries after my own heart, they were huggable, beat-stickable and more than willing to make the trek to my new world so long as I had plenty of plunder to share. Oh, it set back nearly everything I had been able to save by that point, at least a good $15,000 or so, but it was a small price to pay to have the spirits themselves show up at Pegasus's house and start vandalizing shit till they got sent to me. Couldn't afford the Big boss of their's though, that would apparently require both retainer AND travel fees, which just got ridiculous when you were crossing dimensions.

Pegasus himself at least got a few good laughs about it, used the randomly appearing graffiti around his house for some other artistic inspiration apparently. This wasn't the first, nor probably the last time some Duel Spirits demanded to be made. Still gave me a warning that if they did it again he'd bill me though, which was fair and something I'd never do ever because jesus the numbers he quoted hypothetically were ludicrous.

So here I was, now a 15 year old pretty much done with highschool thanks to the magic of not-cheating and summer school classes counting as full courses, a deck out for shinies, and a real need for green myself. I decided to do what every desperate kid has to do eventually.

Get a job.

And wouldn't you know it, Granma Dorothy needed another assistant, on the beautiful and mysterious Duel Academy Island. Yep, that's right, THE, Academia Isle. Ordinarily, I'd avoid the place like hell on Earth, but here's the thing...

The paid a LOT to work there. And by that, I mean enough to make up what I've saved in like half a year, to say nothing of the little perks like living in a tropical paradise filled with cute girls, good food, and enough duelists to scam money off of a Hunter would be drooling.

If I didn't go aplundering with such a place in reach, well I'd have a mutiny on deck. Or some other thinly veiled metaphor, I had to make at least one to three a week, it was in the contract I drafted with the Fur Hire Crew.

Yep. That's about the by and large of it. Time to get gainful employment yet again, as Aidan E. Dorathy...

I'll take your wallet if you call me Dorathy though.

Chapter 2

Getting to Duel Academy, or Academia Isle more specifically, was easy. It was publicly listed in any brochure or guidance office. The hard part was getting there without immediately evicted and or shot upon entering the vicinity. I was lucky in that Granma worked there since she was a student herself, and apparently Mom met Dad when she worked there, so no one really raised any eyebrows when I decided to go do it. No, I just got to have a side-eye view of the other thirteen people coming to join the Academy staff get minorly interrogated and sworn to non-disclosure agreements about what they may see during their time working here, if they had ties to any other duel Academy's, and what hours they would be available working.

Suckers, I just got a pat on the back and moved ahead with a map to the shop. Nepotism for the win! Wait, that undersells me... Eh, not like I'm actually talking to anyone about this.

Beat cleared his throat behind me, but I just threw a roll of quarters at him. Like catnip, them change. Well worth the 10 bucks near literally thrown into thin-air.

Still, it was weird walking along a shoreline with so few people around. Sure, there were some here and there, mostly gardeners trimming the trees to make sure the branches closest to the main road to the Academy didn't fall and crush someone, curious about the new guy, but even that died pretty quickly once they realized I was just another piece of new meat, especially as I came up to a place I'd seen in many a Christmas and other assorted holiday card's.

The Duel Academy Card Store. The building itself was shockingly smaller than you'd expect, more of an add-on to the larger plaza attached to it that served as part cafeteria, part gym building. It sported a bright pink roof, a nice set of fans to really bring in that cool sea breeze, and a sign declaring new Dark Magician Girl Dakimakura body pillows. Damn, that was genius, this was the kind of thing I came here to learn!

To get rich off of horny and stupid kids out to save and or ruin the world! Sue me if I had a little skip in my step when I stepped in the door, giving the bell at the top an extra little jingle just in case. And if my grin got even wider when Granma got into view and hastily set aside the bat she had been carrying, well that was just a trick of the light.

"Granma!" I shouted as I threw up my arms, meeting my pretty much best elderly figure of two lives with a massive hug, which she was quick to reciprocate.

"Aidan! Ohh, it's been ages, I wasn't expecting you for another two days!" Granma was cheery as ever, and while I felt a little guilty at the short notice arrival, it wasn't really my fault.

"I know, I'm sorry about that, but I got shipped here with some of the other greenhorns they hired. 'Saves gas and time'. Like they never come back here when they forget their booze supply..." I grumbled and tried to explain, stepping out of her grasp and letting Granma look me over like a mother hen.

"Now sweetie, there's no need for that, no matter how much it's true. Still, look at you! All ready to work, ooh, at this point it's a family tradition! You have no idea how happy it makes me to see you doing something with your life." Granma chuckled as she tried desperately to flatten my hair, making me step back and run a hand back, leaving it exactly where it began.

"Granma, It's literally just working at a store for a few years, not taking the place over. I mean, come on, Sadie's been working here's for two years already, did she get the same work around?" I blankly said back, taking another hasty step back before she tried to rip off my light jacket in favor of one of her many sweaters.

A man can only get three sweaters in his closet before he has a problem after all.

"Now we both know your cousin Sadie is a different case. She at least came here to try and graduate, but decided to go with us instead. You though...I'm sorry if it sounds rude, but are you sure you want to be a simple shop hand? I've read the letters my son sends me, and the things he says about your dueling...surely, you at least want to give it a chance?" Granma almost seemed to shrink as she spoke, starting to look for once like the 70 year old she was.

I frowned at this sudden dip, but did what I did best. I shook my head, put on a smile, and wrapped her in another massive hug. I just kept holding her for a few minutes, gently rocking and humming the same thing she used to hum me, at least I think so. Ironically, early childhood was kind of a frantic blur. Still, it seemed to do the job as she seemed a lot more like her normal self when I let go.

"Granma, I promise, I have zero interest in being a Duel Academy student, at this point and most likely the future barring extreme circ.u.mstances. Given the choice between that and cracking jokes with you, all while making a pretty good amount of money in a tropical paradise? It isn't even an afterthought. You aren't holding me back, ruining my future, or any other garbage. Got it?" I smirked when I said this, but damn if this was not how I expected this to go. For starters, I thought I'd be the one to cry.

Her smile was a bit watery, but damn if it didn't still make me feel the warm and fuzzies to.

"Ha! Your mother said the same thing to me when we last talked. Said you had no time for the nonsense around here when you could be getting a good paycheck. What kind of child are you, wanting something so sensible instead of exams and drama."

"One a lot smarter and richer than the majority! And I wouldn't have it any other way." I snickered, before she joined in to.

There we stood for what had to be a good 10 minutes, just laughing and poking fun at the stupid shit other kid's and people did before Sadie finally got there, asking with good reason if we somehow got high in the first day I got there. Which, honestly, just made us both laugh harder.

God, I made the right decision.

Chapter 3

I'd been at Duel Academy for around two months now, and I have to say, I can't wait for human contact.

Wait, no, that's insulting to the family and staff currently working and or being trained here. Let me rephrase that. I can't wait for human contact my own age and not related to me. Because so help me god, Wifi is spotty like nothing else on this island, and there's only so much I can enjoy spending sun filled days with my Granma or the guys trying to sleep with her. Oh god, why were there so many of them.

The only reason nothing has happened yet is because I was allowed to roam most any part of the island except for the classrooms, the abandoned dorm, and the one building off to the far cliffs that smelt like burnt monkey, which wasn't ominous at all. Plus they hid the baseball bat, but I only threatened to kneecap one guy, so why even bother?

Anywho, enthusiastic walks over the rivers and through the woods away from Granma's house aside, the time was mostly spent quizzing me on what packs contained what type of cards, how much specific cards set in the binders cost, and the science of upselling to customers. Two of those things were good to to know. As another fun note, I also was taught how to fire the gun that was under the counter by Sadie, in case anyone was ever stupid enough to try and rob a card store located on a privately owned island. They did this but hid the bat, you can understand why I called this world f.u.c.k.i.n.g stupid at times. At least it was stupid to my benefit.

Oh! I also got the recipe book for the select 125 different eggwiches to be made every Friday, which...wasn't really a positive, wasn't really a negative. I don't know why someone thought liver and egg was a good combination, but in it went. But I would be trying the chip, cheese, and beef eggwich on my own time, for me and the crew. I swore I felt Rafale drooling over my shoulder when I was reading it out loud. Just hit everything he loved or something.

So, when I heard that by Air, Sea, and Submersible the students were finally arriving, I was pretty damn happy.

"Honestly, do you want to get away from kid's your age or run after them? It's no good if you get wishy-washy on me while you're staying here!" Granma was quick to chide me while I sorted through the new booster packs, displaying them by color and for any of the new blood desperate to conform to whatever they viewed as the 'best deck ever! 'that week.

"Eh, I'll have you no everyone who's ever lived has been a hypocrite in at least some sense, so I'll bear that title with pride. I know what I want then, now, and most likely next week when I get sick of answering the same questions again and again. That's the sales industry in a nutshell right there!" I shot right back with a quick spin, doing a damn fine show of setting down a box at juust the angle while letting Granma see my smirk.

Then we actually opened shop and the amus.e.m.e.nt took a backseat to the Production ™ .

By this, I mean the fine art of welcoming a customer only to be vaguely ignored, fixing the merchandise they displace looking for 'the perfect or freshest one', and then trying to get them to buy extras or outright doubles. Hey, getting 8 packs of Primal Forces? Why not just tell us what card you're looking for from out binder? What? The cost of a Ghost Rare Summoned Archfiend of Lightning costs three times as much as your packs combined? Well, do you feel lucky punk, I mean dear customer, do you?

So on an so forth. By the end of the day I had my fill of people and was ready to just spend my night counting my fist full of unmarked Duel bills that certainly weren't real legal tender and stare at the sky surrounded by not-pirates but treasure re-appropriator furries. Honestly, not bad. Recon even managed to snag some of that incredible smelling ramen from the Ra dorm's while she was casing some joints or something. At least, that's what I hope she was doing with her telescope. Either way it was a lovely way to spend the night.

Or at least it was until Bravo started hissing, making me turn around to see some lucky bastard come into my clearing with a pretty nice looking ginger on his arm, giggling into his shoulder. His jacket said Obelisk Blue, but his face said 'get out of her kid so I can get laid'. He had a very expressive face.

We both stood there for what felt like an eternity, our eyes locked at he froze and I kept slurping ramen. Eventually the noodles ran out, and with a gulp, the girl finally noticed they weren't alone. She shrieked in alarm and jumped back clumsily, which did marvelous things to watch, as we both no doubt noticed before looking back.

"Hey, scram kid, don't you have some paddelings or something to be getting with the rest of the newbies? Buzz off." "Yeah, Bu-buzz off! So I can buzz on..."

I stared at the two of them for a moment, setting aside my bowl and laying my jacket gently over it to make sure nothing landed in in, before standing up and dusting off my black cargo pants.

"Okay, couple things with what you just said. First off, not a student, they try to paddle me and they'll be the only ones red. Second, I've been here for maybe a few hours, quietly counting my not-money and enjoying the atmosphere and vague silhouette's of the girl's baths over the treeline before you came here. Lastly, this is not the only clearing here. There are, at a bare ballpark, 7 within like a three minute walk around here, mostly cause I think some of the gardeners either keep getting drunk or are trying to make crop circles, maybe both. How about you, and your lady friend I would be only so lucky to have in my sights, go to one of them before we both start something we regret, kay?" I calmly, but firmly spoke, again for the aforementioned reasons, but mostly for the view. Alright it was the view, it was pure chance I found it and I'm not bothering to move.

They, or rather he mostly, evidently didn't see my flawless logic for what it was, if those half lidded eyes and tick mark on his forehead meant anything. With a careful movement he seperated from his partner who, for lack of a better word, flounced her way over to the side of the clearing, while he reached into his jacket and pulled out a duel disk.

Now it was my turn to stare.

"Really? You want to duel over this? While you could be spending time with HER?" At this I just waved my hands to indicate all of her, which she seemed to enjoy, if how she haphazardly waved back was any indication. Either that, or she found a bee.

"You bet your ass I do. I do want to be spending my time with her, but this is the clearing we first met, and this was going to be f.u.c.k.i.n.g special. So I don't see why I shouldn't just crush some random wannabe who didn't make the cut. You gonna leave or do I need to beat some sense into you?" With a flick of his wrist, the disk expanded and the deck was shuffled, and probably would have been intimidating if he didn't have to immediately wave back at his girlfriend after striking his pose.

I was just rubbing the back of my head and reaching for my back at this point, barely holding back a sigh.

"See, if you just stuck with the first few sentences, I would have left no problem. That'd be fine. Then you pushed the pride button, and I just don't take that kind of crap willingly without good reason. Just isn't good for business if people think they can walk all over you, ya'know? So yeah, sure, let's do this. In fact, I'll even be gracious, let you have the first turn, so there's no hard feelings." With a shrug motion, my own duel disk was taken from my back, freed from the little extendable wires they had built in to carry it by when not worn.

As the two projections orbs became a myriad of colors as they synced up, the two of us spoke the word, if with different levels of enthusiasm.

""DUEL!."" (Aidan 4000/ Obelisk F.u.c.ks 4000)

Obelisk F.u.c.ks was quick to draw, grabbing his five cards in a single motion and fanning them out in a way I'm sure he practiced for hours in the mirror to do. With good reason, if his girlfriends squeals of how cool he was were. Damn, he was doing a better job of making me jealous than angry or upset.

"You'll regret giving me the first turn noobie, because I'm gonna open up a world of hurt for you! First, I place 2 cards face down, then Activate Heavy Storm to destroy them both! Unluckily for you, they were both Statue of The Wicked (1000/1000)! When these cards are destroyed, they come back to the field as monsters! And you'll never guess what I'll do with them next!" Obelisk F.u.c.ks chuckled, even as I silently watched. Sensing he actually wanted an answer before continuing for some reason, I tore my gaze away from his friends gigglings and jigglings.

"I'm gonna assume either use Multiply to flood the field or use them for a tribute monster. Am I far off?"

"No! I'm going to tribute-wait, what? How'd you know?"

"It's...pretty obvious? I mean, professor Crowler used this exact strategy during the opening exam, as far as I'm aware."

"Wow, uh, really? Well, this kind of ruins my dramatic reveal. Ah well, doesn't mean I can't still kick your ass out this clearing with my new Summoned Archfiend of Lightning (2500/1200)!" With a swift display of holographic majesty, the two statues on the field arced with lightning, circling between the two before it formed a circle and a giant beast blending with marrow and energy screamed its way into the world.

I merely pounded my fist into my palm with a breath of realization.

"That's where I knew you from! I thought you just had one of those faces, Obelisk F.u.c.ks. Whoops, didn't mean to say that part out loud."

That snapped Obelisk F.u.c.ks out of whatever little summoning rant he was about to go on or something, as he focused his eyes on me after a few blinks or two as the moon illuminated the clearing.

"Wait...you're that kid who sold me SAL! Ha! Hilarious, I love irony, crushed by your own greed! Haha,ha-wait, what'd you call me?" He suddenly switched to a different tangent, even as I sheepishly laughed.

"I..don't actually know your name so I was just calling you Obelisk F.u.c.ks in my head. Sorry?" I offered back.

He turned his head back and forth considering it for a moment before nodding.

"That's fair, and actually pretty flattering. I was calling you Shit Kid in my head anyway. Names Hux, by the by."

"Ah, nice to meet you, I'm Aidan."

"Cheers, I'm sure this would have been better if you weren't c.o.c.kblocking us. Anyway, back to crushing. I play another card face down and end my turn. Make it a good turn, cause I'm not giving you another."

With the go ahead nod, I drew my sixth card, nodded, then shot my opponent a sorry look.

"When you aren't threatening violence for your lady, you seem like a pretty alright guy. Tell you what, after I'm done running shop over you, I'll let you have your privacy. I think my ramen's gone cold by now anyway."

"Oh, that confident eh? Try me!"

"Sure, if you give me the clear. Let's start things off small, with a normal summoning of Beat, Blademaster Fur Hire (1200/500)!" With an almost cartoonish shock of smoke on the field, the cloud was sliced away to reveal the man in all his feline glory, mane of hair blowing in nonexistent wind.

Hux was unimpressed.

"Really? That's your big play? A Cat who doesn't even have a Hat? Got my hopes up and everything."

"I never said I was done yet. See that little bit on the end of his name, Fur Hire? Well they're the best in the biz, and a good adventurer knows when to call in reinforcements, in this case, I get to special summon another Fur Hire monster from my hand, in this case its Recon, Scout Fur Hire (1000/500) in attack mode! And when another Fur Hire other than Beat comes to the field, Beat lets me draw a new Fur Hire from my deck! Go, Echo Evocation!" With a moment of concentration as Recon shimmered into view on a balloon, Beat swung his sword through the air and somehow drew a card from my deck, where I held it up to show Donpa the marksman before I put him in.

"Still not done yet either, this is just the start of your furry troubles. Archfiend's still looking a little too Scary, so Recon'll request back-up as well, in the form of my newly drawn Donpa, Marksman Fur Hire (500/1000) in defense position!" With barely any sound, the marksman stepped out from behind a tree, as if he'd always been there. "Wouldn't you know it, having more hands on deck gives Recon the confidence to take the shot on that face down card you have to! Go, Fur-Enzy shot!" With a quiet snicker, Recon's telescope was aligned with what was without a shadow of a doubt a sniper rifle, which fired a single shot into Hux's facedown, revealing the shattered remains to be mirror force before they fizzled out completely.

Hux was definitely not looking as confident as he was before.

"Huh. So, about those other clearing..."

"Nope, you started this, I'm finishing this. If you haven't guessed this by now, Donpa needs some encouragement too if he's gonna be shooting your demon in its smug face. So let's get a good warcry going, with Bravo, Fighter Fur Hire (1900/200) In attack mode!' With a movement of the ground, four long blades broke through the surface to reveal the hissing lizard, shaking off stray dust like a wet dog. "Donpa, do us a favor and end that overpriced abomination! Job Well Done!" With an almost looney tunes esce grin, his slingshot was loaded with with random rocks that randomly caught in an eerie blue flame.

Finally, Hux was able to interrupt.

"Ha! This is some bullshit I'm seeing right here, but that I can at least stop! When a card tried to destroy Summoned Archfiend and no other card, I can roll a die to see if it goes through!" Hux triumphantly spoke.

I shrugged, then watched as he clumsily took it out of his pocket, rolling it on the grass while it was recorded by his duel disk. It landed on...5.

I might have chuckled a bit when he started swearing under his breath and his Archfiend got pulled into the small blue hole Donpa's rocks had made in its sternum, but that was the game you played with dice monsters.

"Alright, sorry man, this isn't how either of us wanted to spend our night. Still, I'll end it now. Battle phase, Bravo, Beat, Recon, take out our lovely target here with Long Paws of the Law." In an instant the three were jumping up, flashing against the moonlight showing only slitted eyes and gleaming weapons.

"Ahhh! Ah, my nonexistent wounds! The metaphorical pain!" Hux screamed with each 'hit'.

(Aidan 4000/ Hux 4000-2100-900-0000)

"Well at least that was quick. If you ever need cards or someone to give some free money to, you can probably guess where to find me. Enjoy getting your ego and maybe some other things nursed!" I said as I stowed away my cards and picked up my jacket, going deadpan as I saw the bowl licked clean.

God damn it, Filo better not have eaten it when no-one could see, pasta was terrible for birds. Or was that rice?

Such were my thoughts as I wandered away

Off to Spacebattles for more~