Three long dial tones, three long agonizing seconds, and three long paces about the place, three things in thrice, before abrupt muffled static blared into my ears as she finally answered me.
"Hell- "
"Help me."
There was silence on the other end of the line. Lasted for long enough that I actually thought she had hunged up on me. It was only that deep unenthused sigh that I heard afterward that stopped me from trying to dial her up for the third time in a row.
"You got me mixed up again," she said, her voice as detached as the wavering signal on her end. "Detective, not therapist, remember?"
"Yes, well, maybe it's about time you consider a change of profession, you're very good at it."
"Uh… thanks, I guess?"
"You're welcome. Help me."
It was with great reluctance and an even great sigh that she had finally relented and came for Gondor's aid. See? I knew that she was nice.
"Fine," squeaked the static. "What happened now?"
"What's up with your signal?"
"Oh, I'm in a tunnel on a train going through the mountains while on a plane in the middle of Antarctica, what does it matter, you want your counseling or not?"
"Okay, alright, fair enough. Thank you, by the way."
"Yeah, don't mention it. Ever. Now, what happened?"
It was one of those tales that you tell that you can never seem to untell. Even if you wanted to take a breath, you couldn't. You just needed to let it all out there, even if most of what you're saying wasn't really all that intelligible. it didn't matter, you just want someone to hear you - someone to help you.
Lung capacity be damned. I sputtered out my words faster than my brain could form them. Words would be mashed and jammed together, forming new words that wouldn't seem out of place in a pagan ritual.
Then just when it seemed it was never gonna end, it ended. I ended.
Irene took a moment to process what I said, maybe two moments even, I don't know... I said a lot to things. It was a lot to process, I'm sure.
The moral ambiguity of the decision, the consequences that will ripple throughout because of it, the… the obvious lack of an alternative to the choice that lied ahead.
I seriously expected a serious talk about how serious this all was, and how Ash would react to all of this. I expected it to be long, solemn, and sincere… because a revelation like this… does not come easy one bit.
But no, all I got from her was a straightforward - "Tell her the truth, you idiot." Before she hung up on me.
Okay, good talk Irene.
Three steps towards the bed, three minutes passed the clock hung high above, and three knocks sounded at my bedroom door, things in thrice, yet only one of those actions actually mattered.
"Yeah?" I called out, my voice echoing its dejectedness back into my eardrums.
"Feeding…" whispered the shadow from the crack in the doorway.
"So early?"
"You… woke me…"
True. True enough. It was only six in the evening though… usually, I only become a blood bank at nine. That's another thing too. Ash gave me the ultimatum at three in the afternoon, and three hours later, here I still was… waiting for a later that will never come.
Was that an idiotic thing to be doing?
I don't know, let me go call up Irene again to check.
Left without an answer, the wooden door swung ever slightly ajar, peeking through it was a little slit of a pale face with one pupilless eye in my direction.
"Is now… a bad time?" muttered the visible half of her lips.
"Kinda," I admitted.
"Ash… always puts you… in a sad mood…"
"She doesn't," I said, shaking my head. "I do that to myself."
Adalia swung the door a little wider.
"She doesn't… hate you…"
All of her at the wide-open door came at me to say that and only that. Nothing followed. She stood there now, with her hands hidden behind her back, keeping quite still, slowly blinking at me.
Wasn't in the mood for much talk, only managed to let out a feeble "Yeah..." and nodded my head.
"You... You know that… right?" said Adalia.
Course I do. Why was she asking?
"Yeah," I said again, frowning a little.
"Then... there's nothing… to be sad… about," she said, adding on with a lightly-voiced, "Right?"
Oh, I get it now. Not exactly the most direct approach, what she was trying to imply was convoluted as all hell, but I think I get it. The slow cautious approach, the softness in her voice, this was never about feeding.
Atypical as it was, especially since it was coming from the person that technically killed me, still, I knew an attempt at comfort when I see one. Time spent with Ash had practically made me an expert in its intricacies.
"You're concerned," I pointed out.
Adalia took a step past the doorway and nodded her head.
I managed a weak smile her way. "Thanks. But I'm not worried about her hating me. Today has not been kind to her at all. No, I worry she might go on hating herself now. And If she hasn't already, she definitely will after I tell her the truth."
"What is… the truth?"
"The truth is a lot of things," I turned my gaze to the carpeted floor. "I told you, but I didn't tell her. You know about it."
"Oh…"
An 'Oh' that spoke volumes.
"You mean… Asteria?"
"Yep."
"How it is… a game… based off Kronocia?"
"Yep again."
"That Ash… came from… Asteria and not… Kronocia?"
"Yep times three…"
"Oh…" Another 'Oh' speaking to even greater volumes. "Why didn't you… tell her?"
"Because… well because…"
There were so many reasons, I had so many reasons to keep my mouth shut about it, but none more so than the one I first thought of upon launching the game for the first time.
"She's evil," I finally sputtered out. "In the game… she's downright cruel and malevolent. Ash… she already thinks she's evil, I don't need this stupid game to further affirm that belief in her mind. It is not what she needs right now."
In hindsight, I probably should have mentioned this reasoning to Irene just now, perhaps then she would have taken me just a wee bit more seriously.
Then again… she's smart, I'm sure she'd have already considered the ups and downs of such a choice. No… her answer would still remain unchanged, wouldn't it?
And what about you? What of yours, Adalia? You're pausing, you're considering there, actually taking a moment to think things through… what do you have to say for it?
"You're… right…" spoken slowly in a mutter came Adalia's answer. "It isn't… what she needs…"
If only she had stopped there though, if only she had sided with me. Yet, she didn't stop, she continued.
"But it's… what she wants…"
I scoffed. "You think she would want to think she's even eviler than she could possibly imagine?
"She is… evil…"
"Oh come on!" I clicked my tongue. "Not you too!"
"All Elves… are evil…"
"Where is all this hatred of Elves coming from?"
"Not… hatred…" she explained. "It's just… the way it is…"
Okay, her attempt at comfort has gone completely off the rails now. She's just getting me even more exasperated than I already was. I couldn't even be bothered to hide the annoyance in my voice when I next spoke.
"And what does that you Matriarchs? From what I've heard, seen… and felt myself, your kind aren't exactly the kindest either."
If Adalia was hurt or angered by what I said, the blankness of her expression good job at concealing that fact. That, or she really didn't really mind my remark at all.
"It's just… the way it is��" she repeated. "We are… what we are… there's no helping... anything. It's in… our nature. Just like it is… for the nature of Elves… to be evil."
More and more her words continued to irk me.
"She saved my life," I said, glaring. "You've seen her, lived with her - everything she's done - can you honestly look at me now and tell me that she's a bad person?"
Adalia frowned, tilting her head. "I never said… she was... a bad person.
"Then?"
"I said… she is just... evil."
"Evil how?!"
"I... told you," She said, telling me, again, and again, and again for the third time already. "It's just the way... it is."
Not good enough. Nothing she told me was good enough.
"She'll never understand that."
"With respect… to you..." Adalia muttered, bowing her head. "But you… don't know that."
Now that… that…
Couldn't argue with that.
Heck, I couldn't have even if I wanted to. Adalia had vanished from sight as if she was never even there in the first place. Crept away without notice like the vampire she was.
Leaving me… well, leaving me still in a disarray of decisions. I was still adamant about the truth, I still thought it wasn't the right thing to do. But that was what I thought. It wasn't up to me to think for everyone else… to think for Ash.
The truth. It'll be painful, it'll be harsh, it'll be agonizing to bear.
But it'll be right.
And to Adalia, Irene… and Ash especially… that was all that mattered.
There were three things I did afterward that I really didn't want to do. I took my laptop, took my phone, and slowly I walked out into the hall.
I don't know why it was always three, special number maybe… but it was those three things in thrice that had me finally knocking at her door.
Even that action… three knocks.
And then three seconds later, her door swung open.