CH 76

‘Now what do I do?’ His throat felt sandy like he caught a cold. He loosened up his faultless necktie and flinched when he felt the silky fabric. He fiddled with the tie unconsciously, then while he was at the stoplight, he pressed his lips on the bottom of the tie. Not surprisingly, he felt nothing.

He was clenching and releasing the fabric like he was crumpling a piece of paper when his cell phone vibrated. He dropped his tie and took the call, hands-free. He felt more anxious as it was from his sister.

“Ikyung?” This was the first time he had a phone call with her since she came over to his apartment.

“Yoonshin, is now an okay time to talk?” Her voice sounded much better, making Yoonshin somewhat relieved.

“I’m driving, but the speed limit is low here, so I can talk. How did you know to call? Did that family tell you that I met her?”

“Yeah. Apparently, she was raving as soon as she got home. How come you never dated anyone when you could captivate a woman’s heart like that? You had girlfriends when you were still in school, but you stopped meeting anyone once you became a lawyer.”

“Well, that was because I was quite busy. I was younger back then, but meeting someone was too burdensome because I had to also consider marriage.”

“You should start to consider that now. She said you were easy to talk with and kind yet manly. She said she liked you a lot. That’s great.”

“My reaction was probably good because she was also a good person.”

Ikyung must have thought this was a positive sign as her voice brightened up. “Do you like her? That’s even better.”

“She wasn’t bad. I could probably marry her, but I don’t think I could love her.”

As joyful as she was, she found his reply to be odd and asked back, her voice a few decibels higher, “How do you know after one meeting?”

Yoonshin could tell, vaguely. This wasn’t the woman’s fault. This was completely on him.

Throughout the conversation, Yoonshin could only think of another person. It wasn’t charged with like or hate—he simply kept thinking about the other man. He wanted to stop, so he tried to push the other man out of his mind. Yet Sehun filled his brain, completely dominating it. He couldn’t begin to express how guilty he felt by thinking of another person while sitting across from his prospective marriage partner.

Yoonshin felt like he would never be able to forget this strange feeling he got today. For as long as he remembered that funny feeling, he wouldn’t be able to see the other person who was with him rationally. Yoonshin was slightly more conscientious than the average person in that way.

“I just got the feeling. It’s like an intuition of sorts,” he said.

Part of it was his sister’s situation, but another part was because of Sehun, who littered his mind. Yoonshin didn’t tell her that though because he thought it would be overly complicated to explain everything.

“It could change after the second and third meeting. Love isn’t all about something glittering at first sight,” Ikyung said, trying to persuade her brother.

“I know. But I just kept thinking that this wasn’t right. We’re not meant to be. I didn’t like her enough to ask for a follow-up meeting. I wasn’t interested in her at all,” Yoonshin continued.

“Yoonshin.”

“Don’t think that I’m confused because I didn’t get an electrifying feeling from the meeting. I know what it feels like to wonder about another person and want that person to be by my side.”

Ikyung fell silent for a moment and asked in a noticeably cautious tone, “Do you happen to be seeing something else? I assumed that you weren’t, so I never asked.”

Upon hearing that question, nobody should have come to mind. After all, Yoonshin had neither a lover nor anyone close enough to call a romantic interest.

But still, Sehun floated in his mind.

The image of Sehun’s curved and arched lips, the cold eyes that pierced through him, and his rigid fingers that sometimes touched him all whirled in his head, making a mess of it. Yoonshin hesitated briefly and replied honestly, “I’m not.”

“Sorry. I didn’t want to burden you. I only wanted to protect you… And you don’t usually date anyone. I just thought it was a good opportunity. If you really don’t like her, I can reject the offer for you. Still, meet her a few more times, okay?” Ikyung said.

Yoonshin didn’t reply. It didn’t seem like she was expertly trying to throw a wrench in his plans just yet, so he changed the topic in consideration of Ikyung’s complicated feelings. “Are you holding on well? If you showed up like that again, I don’t think I could last.”

When he brought up his concerns that he had pushed down in his heart, she let out a sigh.

“Worry about yourself. I’ve only bumped into Attorney Sehun Kang a few times, so I don’t know him well, but he’s very irritable and cold. But you said you were hanging on well. Attorney Song was praising you to the skies. Although that could just be empty praise to satisfy me.”

Yoonshin automatically thought back to the dinner where he saw Mihee and Sehun. Yoonshin looked sincere and tilted his head slightly to the side. He tried to imagine what face his sister would make if he said that his thoughts were chaotic because of Sehun. He didn’t think she would be very welcome to that, so he decided not to mention it.

“I have a lot to learn,” he said instead.

“That’s a relief to hear.”

“Hey, Ikyung, I told you this before, but I’m a lawyer too. I know you don’t have great faith in me, but let me know if you ever need my help,” Yoonshin said.

Ikyung chuckled at the sweetness of her brother, which in turn melted Yoonshin’s heart with affection.

“That’s reassuring. Thank you. Let’s hang up now. You should concentrate on driving,” Ikyung said.

Yoonshin understood that Ikyung didn’t want to continue the topic. He wanted to go against her wishes internally, but as usual, Yoonshin agreed good-naturedly and bid her well, telling her to hang up first, “Okay. It’s late. Good night.”