Volume 1 - CH 3.1

Period 3: Attack of the Giant Breasts

And then school ended.

We were summoned to the staff room, and in front of us was Yuka-tan… I mean Ringo Kinoshita escorted by Becky-sensei.

“That’s why Kinoshita-san will be staying in the dorms!”

That’s why I was now nervous. There’s no way I wouldn’t be nervous when I was told I would be living in a dorm with an idol. I’m on the verge of fainting.

“We had a moving company do it all during class, so you guys won’t have to do any extra work. Instead concentrate on throwing a welcome party. Sensei will help!” Becky takes out ten thousand yen bills from her wallet and hands them over to Minori. What an amazing teacher. She imagines a bukake scene with salad oil all over her face and posing in M-legs position.

“Ah, yeah yeah. Before we go to the dorms, I want you to show Kinoshita-wan around the school. So say hello to Hata-kun.”

“Whaa?”

“After all, Hata-kun is a class representative.”

“Yeah, that’s right…”

I’m feeling shy, or rather I’m not ready yet…

“Do you hate the idea…?”

“It’s not like that! Let me do it!”

Feeling Kinoshita-san’s expressionless eyes on me, I deeply bow my head. What’s wrong?

*****

When I went out into the corridor with Kinoshita-san, Minori immediately opened her mouth to speak. “Well then, Kei and I will go ahead to the dorm and prepare for the welcome party. Kosaku will go to the school and secure some food.”

“Ingredients?”

“Didn’t you say the livestock program gives you chickens and eggs? Go get that.”

“Oh, got it.”

“Yeah that’s true.” “OK see you later.”

“Good luck”, everyone said as Minori and Kei went to the dorm. It seems like they were thinking of me. I was now alone with Kinoshita.

“…”

“…”

Uh. Um. Um. Uh…!

I’ve dreamed about this moment many times, but now that’s it’s happening I’m really nervous! What kind of small talk should I make? Something like ‘You smell good, don’t you’? DEFINITELY NOT!

“Oh! So let’s start with the basics, shall we?” It’s tempting but I stick to a better topic. “First of all, this is the main building. The places with classrooms are almost like a normal school.”

“…”

Kinoshita-san said nothing. She was expressionless. Damn.

“Well, about the classes… Our school has 5 classes in the first grade. They are divided into groups A, B, F, E, and D. Each group stays together for all their classes all 3 years.”

“Hey…”

“Yeah?”

“Why is there no C class?”

Oh, pretty sharp.

A and B aren’t just the first couple of letters, they represent their departments. The A is for agriculture and production science, and the B is for biotechnology and bioengineering.”

F is for forestry engineering, D is for distribution science, E is for landscaping. (TN Note: I don’t know  why E is for landscaping)

Unfortunately there is no C

“This means that classes are divided into departments or programs. That’s why we’re still in the same group from year to year.”

“…OK”

Didn’t get much of a reaction…

Well, I’m just explaining the school grounds in a matter-of-fact way. I guess it would be asking too much for her to get excited about it, right?

“This is the gymnasium, and behind it is the martial arts arena. Starting from the left you can see the Sanshin north building, the middle building, and the south building across from the dressing rooms. There are so many buildings you might get lost but Group A uses the south building. That isn’t too much for you to remember is it?”

“…(gulp)”

Kinoshita nods half heartedly.

She is clearly bored! I’m depressed that I’m a boring man! I need to introduce her to a more interesting or unusual place! Hmmm, what’s an interesting place to see? Oh, I got it!

“Kinoshita-san. Look over there! That is ‘Green Shop Tamono’, at school….”

“I know.”

“Eh?”

“Is there a place where you sell the products you make?”

“Uh…yeah. That’s right, it’s a direct sales office. You knew about that?”

“…because you taught me.”, Kinoshita-san muttered as she stared at my face.

Huh? Huuuh?

What is it…? Her face seems to say something… It says something but…

“Kinoshita-san? What…”

Is there anything you want to ask? I was about to say that when I heard a strange cry.

‘Myaaaa. Myaaaa’

“….A cat?”

“No, it’s a peacock!”

Here’s some trivia. The peacock says ‘Myaaaaa’.

“A peacock makes noises…?”

“And it can fly.”

Female peacocks often escape and end up the roof of the gymnasium. If you chase it, it will run away. But if you leave it alone it will come down after awhile. Why do they do that? Only the peacocks know.

Kinoshita-san tilted her head slightly while turning her head towards the noise.

“Why is there a peacock at the school?”

“Eh? Whyyyyy do we?”

We don’t raise them to eat them. Is it just because it’s rare? It seems that there are only a few schools that have peacocks in the whole country. I guess that’s why.

“Um… do you want to see a peacock?”

“Yes.”

Ah, you seem to be interested in something. That’s right! Girls like cute things. So rather than showing her around the school buildings I should show her the animals!

HERE WE GO! LET’S GO LOOK

“What happened?”

“Hmm? Never mind that, come over here.”

With a smile like Jizo Bodhisattva, I take Kinoshita-san to the peacock hut.

“The ground is white…”

“It’s lime used as a disinfectant. From here on we’ll be in livestock territory. Oh, you’ll want to wipe your shoes on that mat.”

After wiping off the mud from the soles of our shoes with wet mats to prevent foot-and-mouth disease, we stepped into the animal husbandry major’s territory. The area was outlined by barns.

*****

As it turns out, the peacock wasn’t fun at all. If you think about it peacocks aren’t particularly rare. Even if you are looking at them they don’t perform any tricks or anything. So I guess most people wouldn’t be very entertained. We got bored in about 2 seconds.

But it’s A-O-K!

“Kinoshita-san, come over here.”

I have her come with me to another hut a short distance away from the aviary. In here is…

“…Kangaroo?”

“That gentleman there is a wallaby. Young Master!” When I call out his name he jumps into my chest. It’s so cuuuute…

“Is it an adult?”

Young master is a ‘tammar wallaby’, and even when he grows up he’ll only be the size of a small dog. It’s about a 10’th the weight of a kangaroo. Young master is also the official school mascot and clearly more important than us students.

The spacious wallaby enclosure looks more like a detached house than a hut. The interior is fully equipped with carpeting and air conditioning. Even the dorms don’t have air conditioning.

“What’s up with this?”

“It was given to us by a sister school in Australia last fall as a token of friendship.”

“Huh…”

“But that’s just a pretext, I actually bought it at a pet shop in Nagoya.”

“You bought it!? And in Nagoya?!”

“Yup, for 200,000 yen.”

“That’s a hefty price…”

“ Well it is true that one was given to us by a sister school you know. Once it was ready for transportation it became prohibited to take it out of Australia due to new regulations. But once we said “We’re getting one” we had to deliver… Well anyways money ended up solving all the problems.”

We weren’t told about all this at the time so we believed Young Master was born in Australia.

“That’s why I put a stuffed koala in this house and raise the Australian flag, so that he won’t feel lonely…”

“Even though it was born in Nagoya…”

I’ve since switched the koala with a Doara (TN Note: The koala mascot of the Japanese baseball team the Dragons) stuffed animal and put Shachihoko (TN Note: This is a mythical creature with the head of a lion and the body of a carp that is on the roof of Nagoya Castle) on the roof.

As I was lost in reminiscing while holding Young Master Kinoshita-san whispers, “That’s very nostalic…”

“Yeah. Since wallabies are not domesticated animals they don’t seem to get along well with people. At first Young Master would often escape.”

However after a certain incident the young master stopped being afraid of humans.

“Incident?”

“It was at Christmas last year. It was a very cold night…”

That day the young master escaped from the wallaby house and wondered around the school as usual, but he was exhausted by the cold. I happened to come back then from my part time job and found Young Master lying face down in front of the dormitory. I took him back to his room and slept while hugging him in a pillow cover.

“Since then the young master has become attached to humans. When it gets dark and everybody leaves the school he gets lonely and comes to visit the dormitory.”

“…ahuh.”, Kinoshita-san said quietly while staring at Young Master who was being held by me. “…that’s nice…”

“Ah, Kinoshita-san. Would you like to hug him too? He’s really fluffy, do you want to feel?”

“…”

Kinoshita-san fell silent with an expression as if she wanted to say something again. Something like ‘Of course I do, dumbass’