Chapter 188 - Inner Demons … Or Something Like That

Qiu Ling stared at the woman opposite him with a deadpan expression. She looked back at him with one just as lacking. For a while, the two of them continued like this, until Qiu Ling couldn't take it anymore and averted his gaze.

"What good does staring at me do? You're still not going to come back to life."

The woman didn't answer. She just sat there, opposite him, and continued to stare.

Qiu Ling took a deep breath. He really didn't know how long he had been sitting there, locked in this stupid situation. He wanted to stand up and go but he didn't know where.

He sighed. "It's pretty obvious why you're here. You want me to feel guilty. Do you think you'll live on that way?" He peeked over but she was still just sitting there, staring at him. Qiu Ling grew silent again.

This woman … measured in human years she looked to be about sixteen or seventeen. She was a dragon, though, so that would make her about four-hundred centuries old, maybe even a little more. He knew because he had known her when she was still alive.

"Seriously, even if you hadn't died, I never would have married you. It was all your wishful thinking."

He took another peek at her but with the same result. It was as if she couldn't change her expression at all. For a moment, Qiu Ling was tempted to go over and try. He hadn't even managed to fully turn around when he already discarded the idea. What going over and trying? He'd rather continue to sit here and be stared at!

The silence between them stretched.

Another hour went by and Qiu Ling sighed. "You see … I'm sorry. There, I said it. And I actually really mean it. You could have had a nice husband and children and … well, you could have had a future if you hadn't met me. I'm sorry for taking that from you. But it's been long past. Why can't you … just go away? There is nothing I can do about it anymore."

He still didn't get an answer. Qiu Ling covered his face with his hands. This was dumb. "You're not even really there. I'm just imagining you." He didn't know whether he was talking to her or to himself. Maybe it was both.

"I'll just stand up and go." He said so but he continued to sit in the same place. And yes, he had been sitting there since coming to this place, not even moving half an inch.

Qiu Ling stared off into the darkness. Seeing the woman opposite him, he could already imagine what else was out there. No, thanks, but he had no desire to see any of these things. This right here was bad enough.

Yes, this was the reason why Qiu Ling still hadn't woken up. Normally, when one was confronted with his inner demons one would either fight against them or be devoured by them. Qiu Ling had decided to ignore it, though, and thus arrived at this standstill.

Qiu Ling was growing restless, though, and it got worse with each passing day.

He turned back toward the woman and frowned. "You know I totally don't mind that you're angry at me. Actually, you have every right to do so. Heavens, if somebody killed me before I could get married, I certainly would make them pay. But seriously, this kind of making someone pay is dumb. Can't you just come back as a restless soul and haunt me out there? Why do we have to do this in here?"

This time, he actually stood up, his gaze scurrying everywhere. He wanted to get out of there. Never mind facing off against his inner demons. He had ignored them for so long, he could continue to do so. But he had to leave his inner self somehow.

"Jing He is still waiting for me. Who knows how much time has already passed out there? Ah." Qiu Ling had only gone a few steps before he sank to his knees covered his head with his hands. "My love … I never should have gone and tried to save those insignificant people. I should have picked you up and carried you to the teahouse. Then, we could have fled with mother-in-law. Who cares about the rest? Natural disasters happen all the time. The humans certainly would have found some kind of explanation for it."

Qiu Ling groaned. "No! What should I do? You're all alone on that cold mountain now. You must be asking yourself whether I abandoned you or if I will still return. You're probably sitting there right now, ripping out the leaves of a flower, trying to divine whether I love you or not. Uh, really, you don't have to fret about that! I'll always love you, always!"

He leaped to his feet again and started to pace up and down, completely ignoring the woman opposite him. "Don't you worry, my love. I'll make it up to you. As soon as I get out of here, I'll fly over to where you are and pull you into my arms. I'll hug you and shower you with kisses and then we can talk about our marriage again. You'll see: You'll feel much safer after we're married."

He stopped and pondered for a moment. "Before we talk about the marriage, I should probably confess my feelings again. Ah, I already told you in the most perfect way the last time. What am I supposed to do now?"

He frowned and a serious expression found its way onto his face. If one saw him like this, one might actually expect him to ponder on how to vanquish his inner demon.

"Mn … blue robe … your hair … Ah, I should include that, too. Inner qualities are important." From time to time, he mumbled in the darkness. In the end, he turned around to the woman that was still staring at him. "I've finished. You can let me out now."

The woman didn't react, earning her a frown from Qiu Ling.

"I'm serious here. I just found the perfect way to confess my love again. So let me out. I want to do it as soon as possible." He waited but still didn't get an answer. Qiu Ling's gaze wandered around. "It couldn't be … you want to know what it is?" He raised his brows and looked at her.

"Ah, well, if it's like this …" He waved with a smile and sat down next to her. "Actually, I've composed a poem for him", he said proudly, looking at his inner demon with a smug expression.

Yes, indeed, Qiu Ling had started to compose a poem instead of thinking through how to deal with her. His beloved always was his first priority, after all. And this confession was important.

He was sure that a poem was the next best way to confess his feelings. Jing He was a cultured person, after all. He loved hearing poems. If he managed to compose a poem that was truly able to capture Jing He's greatness and his love for him, then that would definitely deepen his beloved's feelings. Thus, Qiu Ling was satisfied with himself right now.

Satisfied enough to forget for a moment that he was still trapped in his inner self. Ah, thinking of his beloved just had this kind of magical effect on him.