Chapter 36: Feeling Uncomfortable Because of Some Weird Baldie Acting Chummy
Crack! Craaack!
Mosto shuddered. After drinking the malevolent god’s blood, his body began to evolve.
This power! With this, becoming the new ruler of the empire wouldn’t be impossible—no, I can probably even secure myself a seat with the gods!
If that happens, that alluring Goddess Arachne would be his!
Whiiiing!
But then, a typhoon crashed into his tantalizing daydream.
“...?”
The moment Mosto looked up, he went speechless. The malevolent god’s colossal palm, which could cover the skies, was coming down on him like a meteorite!
“Arrrgh!”
Slap! Squash!
***
“Ouch! It hurts!”
Slap!
I had reflexively slapped my forehead. Then, I looked at my hand, stained with the remains of a dead mosquito and my blood. I inadvertently frowned.
“Sigh, it's almost winter. Why are there still mosquitoes around? Also, why my forehead of all places?”
Darn it, South Korea. No wonder they said you've been slowly turning into a Southeast Asian country. Even mosquitoes can be seen in late autumn.
I’d have to grab some mosquito repellent from Daiseo tomorrow.
“Ugh, it's super itchy. Should I apply a mosquito bite relief cream?”
I scratched the small red bump on my forehead and continued working on my manuscript.
The next morning...
“Aaargh! What the hell is this?!”
Absolutely nothing could prepare me for the horror that awaited me when I gazed into the mirror. A black skull tattoo, the size of a baby’s fist, had appeared on my forehead!
I tried washing it with soap, but it didn’t go away at all. Just when did this appear?!
“Ohoho. The power of darkness has come.”
This rebellious phase type of line would go so damn well with that tattoo.
Ding!
[A mark of Leader of the Horrible Plague.]
[The curse of chills is now active.]
Huh? What's this?
All of a sudden, chills began spreading all over my body.
“Achoo!”
***
Somewhere, a man took out a skull-shaped bomb that he had prepared in his bag. As a matter of course, it wasn’t just any bomb.
It was a biological bomb made of byproducts of an A-rank monster, the Bomb Bug. Since it could bypass any metal detector, it was a top-tier item on the black market. It wasn’t as uncommon as it was expensive, since the asking price could hit hundreds of million Korean won. A feat made possible because the black market was sponsored.
Rip! Riiip!
With the bombs lined up nearby, the man called Kim Teh-Beom began ripping box tape. He was a warrior chosen by the Order. Despite being a newly emerging religion, it couldn’t be compared to other countless religions on Earth. After all, their religion genuinely believed in the existence of gods.
It was no delusion either. Kim Teh-Beom had witnessed the glorious miracles by himself, performed by none other than Johan, the emissary and apostle of god who had descended on Earth. Furthermore, it was only because of Johan’s baptism that a G-rank Hunter like himself could ascend to C-rank.
“My dear precious followers, did you see that? That Second Moon shining brilliantly in the sky? It is but an omen. It won’t be long until our god descends and cleanses this rotten world! To welcome him, we have to make countless sacrifices! Kim Teh-Beom, Warrior of God, do not be afraid. The more sacrifices you offer to our god, the more treasures and beauties await you in heaven!”
Recalling Apostle Johan’s words, a maniacal grin crept to Kim Teh-Beom’s face.
“Leave it to me. Everything will go according to the wishes of Apostle Johan and our god!”
***
Ding! Ding!
[The curse of fever has been activated.]
[The curse of muscle pain has been activated.]
[The curse of anemia has been activated.]
...
“Aigoo, I'm dying.”
I thought aspirin would solve it, but the symptoms only got worse. The fear of death made me consider going to the hospital. But then, the fear of hospital fees made me reconsider. Ultimately, I turned to God’s Shop in God-Maker. The hospital would be my last resort.
-----
[Yuanhua’s Pill made Using Secret Formula from the Classic Green Satchel (Low-tier God)]
Category: Exclusive Item for Benevolent God
Price: 50,000 Gcoins
-----
As I scrolled through the list in God’s Shop, this particular item caught my eye. Yuanhua may sound foreign, but it is the true name of Hua Tuo, the god from the Three Kingdoms. Still, it was somewhat misleading. Anyway, as someone in the field, I haven’t heard of a writer who wasn't a fan of the Three Kingdoms.
I purchased it without hesitation.
[---]
A male human. Around for 31 years.
Special note: A follower of ???, the God of Destroyer.
-----
Huh, follower of ???, God of Destroyer? What’s that?
Groooowl!
Just then, my stomach rumbled, signaling for an upcoming battle. Shit, the one from earlier wasn’t the end of it?!
“Arrrgh!”
Clunk! Bam! Ploop ploop ploop! Brrrr!
***
“Ugh... My asshole... feels like it’s ripping apart...”
I crawled out of the stall as if I had just survived a second or even third war.
“Kyaaa!”
Then, chaos ensued.
The skinhead I saw earlier was restraining a nurse with one hand. He was strapped with what appeared to be bombs all over his body, holding a detonator in his free hand.
“P-please save me!”
My mind froze the moment I saw that. This was straight out of a movie! Was I cursed?! Why did so many bad things happen to me recently?!
“Everyone! Don’t move and get on the floor! Run, and all of you will die!” threatened the man while raising the detonator.
“Aaaaaaaaaah!”
Screams erupted from everywhere. People dropped themselves to the floor in a heap, their expressions full of terror.
Meanwhile, I was petrified on the spot, still desperately trying to wrap my head around everything. At that moment, my eyes met the skinhead’s. For some reason, he smirked and even winked at me.
Dude, I don’t even know you!
As a result, those crawling on the floor eyed me suspiciously, probably suspecting me of being his accomplice.
N-no! I'm not! This is a misunderstanding! I don't know this baldie!
I shook my head profusely.
Then, as I slowly got down on the floor, avoiding their piercing gazes...
Flash! Boom boom boom!
With a brief flash of lightning, the entrance was destroyed, and an alluring figure of a woman emerged from the dust. She was wearing a black helmet and insulated tights.
Crackle! Craaackle!
Intense bolts scattered from all over her body, sparking hope in the victims and striking fear into the baldie.
“T-Thunder Emperor?” Baldie exclaimed in horror.
Yep, that’s right! My baby, the electrifying girl, has appeared! Ms. Sung Mi-Ri! Quick, blow that baldie away and save us!
“D-don’t move! Especially you, Thunder Emperor! You think I won’t blow this whole place up?!”
“Kyaaa! Please save us!”
Thunder Emperor was about to leap straight at the baldie when she saw the skull-shaped bombs and hostages.
“Hmph, what a coward!” She scoffed.
Just then, Baldie looked right at me, and shouted desperately, “Please help me, Brother! I can’t possibly handle Thunder Emperor alone!”
“What? You have an accom... Huh?! Mister? What are you doing here?”
Then, they both stared at me and started arguing out of nowhere.
“Who are you calling ‘Mister’?! He is the henchman of the Order and Apostle Johan!”
“Says who?! He is my mentor!”
“Nonsense! How do you explain that evil and sinister power coming from him?!”
“Did you just call my mentor evil and sinister? Do you want to die?!”
Thanks to that, all eyes were on me. I broke into a cold sweat.
Fuck, leave me out of this!
Ding!
[The curse of necrosis has been activated.]
Just as I was pondering over what to do next, another message appeared.
Necrosis? As in, the collapse of cellular tissues or cessation of their functions?
At the same time, the jaw of the skull tattoo on my forehead opened wide.
-Kikiki!
An eerie laughter, resembling that of a grim reaper, resounded.
“Cough! Blegh!”
I vomited black blood, my vision growing hazy. The skull on my forehead declared ominously.
-Young god, the hour of your death has finally arrived!