“You may not understand, Hua Jin.”
Yun Shishi smiled. “A smart, sensible boy like Youyou wouldn’t want to be treated like a patient either. Like Natalia, he’s strong in character. He can be indifferent to any scorn, but he doesn’t take well to pitying looks. She’d be unhappy if you treated her like a patient. Because she doesn’t think she’s a patient, rather, she’s just a little different from the others. Think about it. Natalia grew up without a home or a sense of belonging, so she’s stubborn. The only way she can properly protect herself is if she’s armed like a hedgehog. In fact, you can understand that, can’t you?”
Yun Shishi, too, had grown up in a welfare home. She was not as aloof as Natalia. She was stubborn, but unwilling to grow those prickly thorns. Even though she had been hurt many times over, she was willing to face the world with a smile. Because, when she was a child, someone had once told her something.
Who that person was, she could not remember now. All she could remember was that the person said, there was only one kind of heroism in the world, and that was to recognize the darkness of reality and still be passionate.
She wanted to be this hero. Natalia was different. She could only protect herself with her prickly spines.
The actor looked thoughtful.
He replied solemnly, “I understand…”
As a young man, the actor had often felt strange stares from all sorts of people around him. They belittled him and did not think much of him. However, he had long forgotten those looks.
He only vaguely remembered one time when he’d been physically injured. He’d been taken to the hospital and a doctor had examined him. The doctor had looked at him with an expression of pity and sympathy.
That look almost made his heart bleed. It wasn’t that he was disgusted by it. It was a sort of unfamiliar feeling. And he didn’t like it.
“I got it.”
Yun Shishi asked, “It’s late. Is she asleep?”
“Yeah, asleep. … I guess. I didn’t go to her room. I’ll sneak around a little later.”
“Yeah, it’s getting late. I’ve got to go tell bedtime stories to Youyou too!’
“Okay. Good night.”
After ending the call, he placed the phone casually on the railing and looked up, feeling a little lost.
He stared into the night. It made him think back to the many times in his youth, after he’d been beaten up, when he had also secretly stood under the night sky, looking up and muttering, as if to God or himself.
When exactly would these times of darkness end? Life was really full of dread and darkness back then. He even felt that sometimes he had the courage to die, but not to live.
But now, those dark memories were blurry and behind him. Time really would erase everything. Unconsciously.
Late night.
Hua Jin walked quietly to the door of Natalia’s room, turned the knob, and opened it before entering. Natalia was asleep on the bed, but the whole room was bathed in a purple glow.
He couldn’t help being curious. The purple light was eerie and intense, but he didn’t remember buying a purple light fixture. This purple light source seemed to be emanating from the corner of the bed.
Curious, the actor walked to the head of the bed, discovering that the light source was coming from a crystal ball.
A crystal ball? Was it a lamp?