"So stuck up~" She groaned, rocking back and forth irritably. "I ain't a lot of time, you want my deal or not?"
"First off, you haven't even told me what this deal is," I said with matching irritability. "Second, who the f.u.c.k are you?"
She glared at me, and I glared back. It was bravado stemming from somewhere. It was a bravado I felt would kill me if I said the wrong thing as well. For a few moments, we stared each other down before the woman rolled her eyes.
"Questions questions questions~" The girl sang before she sprung to her feet and wagged her finger at me - laughing. "You're a hard nut. Name's Cyril. Creator of this fine dysfunctional world - You'll hate it here."
The words took me off guard. Hate it here? Was this woman off her rocker-
"Got you there!" She laughed "Yes. I am indeed off my rocker."
"Are you reading my thoughts?" I blurted out.
"Indeed," She smiled. "Thanks for compliments about my body, I like it too."
Jesus f.u.c.k is this woman cr--
"Not crazy," She hummed. "Maybe sad; Maybe Malevolent; Maybe a tad, itty bitty f.u.c.k.i.n.g pissed. But not crazy."
The smile she gave me screamed crazy, but I made sure not to think that anymore. Because her eyes were glowing slightly brighter now. I didn't want to know if they were power gauges, or she was going to punch me. Honestly, anything was on the table at this point. And when I didn't say or think anything else, she continued.
"Since we got that settles, I guess I could explain this deal~" She cooed and threw herself back into the chair. "Anyways, I guess I'll go through the list of questions the others keep asking. No, you're not on earth anymore - you're on my world. Yes, there are ways to go back. No, you don't want to go back. Your world is dead, killed with nuclear fire! Now, interested in that deal?"
She tossed the bottle away. It crashed somewhere around the smith's house. She then leaned forward and looked to me with expectant eyes.
"I-I'll hear it out..." I gulped, feeling that this woman was definitely not all there.
"So, here's the deal, I will make you my Champion. In return, I'll give you cool-ass powers." She winked and sat back. "In return, you do my bidding~"
"That sounds like slavery," I said.
"Only if slaves got world-altering powers that could change the face of the entire geopolitical scale. Then sure." She shrugged.
"That doesn't sound like a good deal at all!" Exasperated by her go-lucky demeanor, I yelled.
"Hey, hey!" She pointed her finger at me. "I'm only giving you this deal as repayment!"
"Repayment my ass!" I pointed back. "The hell kind of repayment is this, and for what?!"
"Psh, it's repayment." She huffed. "You landed in some deep shit, and I didn't clean it up in time. Thus, you are here, and I am offering you this deal."
"Wait, what do you mean 'didn't clean it up in time'?" I asked, feeling a disconnect.
"Ah, right... " She looked at me and muttered before sitting back. "Forgot that part - duh. Anyways, long story short. Some new gods down south wanted to summon some Heros to go kill some demons they really hated. Your world nuked itself at the same time they opened a portal to kidnap some poor folks. Amazing luck you know? The odds for that has to be f.u.c.k.i.n.g smaller than a mana atom."
"Wait, wait -" I jumped in. "What does that have to do with me?"
"Don't interrupt a girl when she's speaking, "The girl glared at me and I just sat back and zipped my mouth. "Anywho - the nukes supercharged the spell, and kinda ripped a lot more people than it was supposed to. Literally blew up the summoning chamber. Thankfully, the nuke's blast didn't reach into this world because I sealed it in time. For f.u.c.k's sake, had I not woken in time, they would have wiped their country off the map."
"And I was one of them," I couldn't help but say as she wasn't actually answering my question. However, I figured she couldn't actually keep a thought straight enough to answer. So I had the idea to slowly nudge her towards the answers I needed.
"Ah, yes. You were one of them along with a few hundred others." She confirmed while her head bobbed softly.
"So... That means all those people died... For nothing?" I asked, feeling anger well up in my stomach. Not at this girl, no, at whoever f.u.c.k.i.n.g did this.
"In the context of what you're asking? Totally - no meaning what so ever," She no longer smiled. "But that's the grand thing. You survived. Despite being dropped in the middle of a large goblin raiding host, you survived; even if by the skin of your teeth. That's some serious luck - and something I could get behind."
I'd given her the benefit of the doubt and didn't blame her. However, her nonchalant attitude towards them was seriously pissing him off.
"Don't take it the wrong way," She added. "What happened down there was horrible. Through and through. However, that's why I'm handing you this deal. Yeah, sounds shitty, but you might like where I'm heading with this."
I took a deep breath and took a few moments to simmer down to hear it.
"Okay, shoot," I said.
"I'm aiming to humiliate those f.u.c.k.i.n.g idiot upstarts for wrecking my world," The woman said. "And I'll give you power. I saw you had some guns and armor. Gave me some ideas about what I'd do for you. However, should I do this for you, I want you to go after those assholes. With some conditions."
"The people who pulled me into this world?" I asked.
"Mmm~hmm~" She hummed.
I paused for a moment. I hadn't done much in my life that amounted to anything. Neither had I have people die to protect me nor almost die. I delved deep in myself. I lurked and tried to find what I wanted. Did I want revenge? Did I feel a need to kill the f.u.c.ker who did this?
A moment later, the answer came - but I had one last question.
"Can't I take the down without this deal?" I asked.
"How strong are you?" The woman eyed my, admittedly, slender frame.
I had muscle, and I could do anything a guy my age could do. Effeminate looks aside.
"Average guy stuff," I said.
"Your world average?" She asked.
I felt the question was a trap.
"Yes...?" I said.
"You're gonna die out there." She pointed out into the forests beyond the village. "You'd probably survive in the village if you sell yourself.
"How so?" I said, feeling offended.
"No offense, but men from earth, on average, are weaker than men here." She stated. "Men here are mostly farmers, knights, soldiers, or other heavy labor types. That is if they're not rich or powerful. All the same, that also doesn't account for the monsters and other hostile forces that roam the land."
"Isn't that--" She waved me off.
"Not like your world. Safety here is far and inbetween. Wars are constant. Death is normalcy. Your days aren't guaranteed. My world is twisted, malformed. Of the utmost degree, it is violent. The best person to have in your corner is a powerful figure - and whos more powerful than gods?"
"I see..." I said. "And will this require me to sacrifice unborn children or v.i.r.g.i.n girls?"
The serious expression that'd formed on the girl's face twitched.
"No," She said with a very, very deadly tone. "And if you do try it, I'll make sure your soul burns in the deepest f.u.c.k.i.n.g pits I can find. Up for the deal now?"
"Y-Yeah, I'll take it," I said. I felt slightly cold now.
"Good!" She beamed," Cross your heart and hope to die~"
She made an "x" over her heart, and I followed suit subconsciously. The skin above my heart began to sear for a moment, and I yelped. Before I could try and figure out what happened, a familiar object was shoved into my hands.
"Gotta go," The girl said. "We'll talk later.
"Wait!" I said." You never told me your name!"
"Names Cyril, Creator of the World." She smiled mischievously.