Chapter 13:

Chapter 13:

"Okay, so," Issei asked as he stood in front of Saji, with everyone else watching from the side in the lavish living room under the afternoon, "What have you discovered so far?"

"Okay, uh, well, I can drain someone's blood and transfuse it elsewhere," Saji replied while showing the Sacred Gear on his hand.

"Subtle but lethal, that's good. Come on, keep it going." Issei snapped his fingers in approval, as well as to beckon Saji to continue.

The Pawn then was about to say something, but the words seemed to die in his mouth with nothing more for him to say.

"...That's it for now, sorry." He replied with a sheepish expression.

Issei blinked before he deflated, "...Really? You spent five days training your ass off, three days of intensive practice and study, and that's what you came up with so far? Come on, man! Give me something else, just one more thing!"

"Gimme a break, Hyd! It's not as if my Sacred Gear talks to me like yours does!" Saji defended.

Issei opened his mouth for a moment before he slowly closed it. "...Yours doesn't?"

If he recalled, Azazel did tutor him on the subject of Sacred Gears Well, when he had time to teach him. All he learned was the basics from Azazel as the Fallen was very busy reverse-engineering Genos' cybernetic specs at that time, only teaching him the topics of Sacred Gears, Balance Breakers and such.

"Yeah? Not a lot of Sacred Gears talk, you know? You're lucky that you got one of the big thirteen out of all the hundreds of Sacred Gears in existence," Saji retorted.

"Lady Luck must be giving you the middle finger, then," Black commented from the sofa, eating from a bag of cookies while not giving Koneko's pouting glare any attention.

"Still, did you ever try to get your Sacred Gear do something that Well, lamely put, deviates from its normal function?" Issei asked. He could not find any other words to describe the process like that trick he used to mimic his dad's one-shot punches.

"Err. I guess not." Saji asked. "However, do you have any suggestions for me to work on?"

"You tell me. I know shit about your gecko gauntlet," Issei shrugged. "Though, Ddraig seems to know something. Let's ask the 'ancient, wise dragon'."

[Again, screw you.]

Ddraig spoke, the emerald jewel of Boosted Gear glowing, his voice reaching everyone in the room. Everyone turned to look at the gauntlet on Issei's left arm, stunned by the new voice joining their discussion. Rover perked his head from Asia's hands as he started barking at Issei's arm decoration, causing the girl to shush him while rocking him in her arms.

Much to Black's and Tsubasa's mild surprise, Rover actually calmed down under Asia's treatment.

"...Well, I guess it's time for introductions." Issei let a wry grin as he raised Boosted Gear to everyone. "Everyone, meet Ddraig, Rover's favorite chew toy, and my personal spirit animal. Ddraig, meet everyone."

[...Really? Chew toy?] Ddraig retorted as if insulted. They could practically hear him rolling his eyes in the gauntlet. [My host's sense of humor aside, allow me to formally introduce myself. I am the spirit of Boosted Gear, the Welsh Dragon, Ddraig.]

Immediately in response, Rias stepped forward and curtseyed with practiced ease.

"It's a pleasure to speak with you, Lord Ddraig. My name is Rias Gremory of the 72 Pillars. Behind me are my peerage and the servants of my old friend."

[You may spare me the introductions as I know everyone here through my host.] Ddraig waved her introduction off.

Rias blinked at the dismissal, but she stepped back without any word.

[...Besides, I am called to inform the Wielder of the Absorption Line of its origins.] Ddraig said, pointing to Saji on the couch.

"...Oh." Saji gulped a little. "So, uh can you tell me about my Sacred Gear? I'm kind of new to it."

[Of course you are. You are but a hatchling that left its shell too late. I have been with my host since he was child.] Ddraig retorted. [My host had years of training under the most estranged bunch I've ever encountered in my years as one of the Two Heavenly Dragons. You just took the first step.]

Saji lowered his head a little. Issei could tell that Ddraig's comparison was hindering Saji's self-confidence, like measuring his worth using a pro as a benchmark or something.

"Moving on, what's with his Sacred Gear? Can we even work on it?" Issei asked.

[For your second question, that depends. As for the first the identity of the dragon in that Sacred Gear is one of the Five Great Dragon Kings - Vritra, the Prison Dragon. At least, I believe it is] Ddraig informed the borrowed Pawn as he raised his head, his eyes lighting up.

"Wait, a Great Dragon King? That sounds pretty badass." Saji remarked as he eyed his Sacred Gear with newfound confidence and awe.

[Don't get your hopes up yet, whelp. There is something wrong with the presence inside your artifact. For some reason, Vritra feels incomplete. Like I am feeling a broken piece of a collective.] Ddraig interjected. [I have not been in touch with Vritra for a long time, but I did hear that he died by the hands of the Heavenly Emperor. As for what happened next, I do not know. My conjecture is you are wielding a piece of Vritra at best.]

"'A piece'? You mean a Sacred Gear can actually be divided?" Issei asked.

The information was a new one for Issei. He had never heard of a Sacred Gear broken into separate lesser Sacred Gears before.

[Kid, this is my first time seeing a broken Sacred Gear. I'm not the creator, I'm just an ancient wise dragon who was just made into a gauntlet against his will.] Ddraig retorted.

"So does that mean there are more Sacred Gears like what I'm wielding now?" Saji asked.

[Who knows? Again, I am not the creator. But if there are well, hold your expectations high, welp. There might be some hope for you, yet.]

"Alright alright" A small smile broke out Saji's lips, hope burning on his face along a swell of confidence bubbling in his stomach.

"That still doesn't mean you should slack off, boy," Black interjected from the couch, chewing on more cookies to Koneko's chagrin.

"Moving on." Issei spoke before Black could continue verbally thrashing Saji's self-esteem. "Looking back at what we know about Phenex. Can you focus on draining magical power, or in this case, a devil's demonic power?"

"Yeah? That is kind of my main gimmick so far," Saji shrugged.

Rias, on the other hand, widened her eyes as if in an epiphany. "Of course! Why didn't I think about it sooner!?" She had finally understood the one way that she could triumph over the immortal Phoenix with Saji as the key player.

When Issei heard about the Phenex's absurd ability to regenerate from any form of Well, almost any form of damage, Issei previously suggested getting Holy items to make the fight fair.

However, bringing consecrated items from the Biblical Church was frowned upon by Devil Society. The Noble Devil society did not want to see their greatest weakness abused in a game meant to showcase Devil superiority, although they couldn't complain if a Devil wielded a Sacred Gear or a Holy Sword instead, and the legitimacy of Rias' victory would be questioned if she used holy weapons from an enemy faction, especially the Grigori.

Thus, Saji's Absorption Line came into play.

Moving to the backyard, Asia prepared herself in the face of several Black clones, each scratching their rears without care for being seen. Another afternoon exercise was in effect, this time to appraise her current fitness after several days of vigorous exercise for the role of the Healer and her capacity to avoid the enemy's attacks.

"Alright, Asia. All you need to do is to avoid Black as best as you can, okay? You got this." Issei encouraged his ward.

Looking at Asia, he felt as if he was taking care of a little sister he never had. She looked up with trembling eyes bubbling with fear and courage mixed in.

"Yes, I-I'll do my best!" Asia affirmed with a resolute nod, ready to test herself as a healer.

"Black, you up?" Issei asked his lifelong friend(s).

"Ready whenever." The acting-leader Black clone saluted as the rest either snickered or rubbed their hands together deviously.

"...Black, one more thing." The creature met Issei's gaze that demanded no nonsense. "Be mindful of where you put your hands on."

Issei trusted this one, but Black Sperm had a tendency for mischief, using Saji as a potent example.

"I'm not that kind of guy, kid." Black rolled his eyes as he turned to Asia.

Asia looked brimming with confidence but her legs were visibly trembling. Her nervousness was palpable to Black and the onlookers. She looked like a puppy trying to be brave in front of a lion To be precise, a lion and its pride.

"Alright, whenever you're ready, Asia!" Issei gave the green light.

The Blacks dispersed and surrounded the former nun. Seeing the growing army of Black Sperm surrounding her, boxing her, she whimpered as her legs shook even more, her eyes starting to be a bit teary at Black's growing numbers.

However, The Blacks stopped their tracks as they gave Asia a good long stare before the cloud of guild started settling on their faces.

"Stop giving me that look." One Black demanded.

"You're making me feel bad." The lead Black spoke up.

Issei could not disagree with Black's statement. Issei might have received similar feelings in Black's position.

"Alright, you can start now!" Issei stepped back to the crowd and shouted.

When Asia took the first step in her sprint, the Blacks slowly walked back as they scattered while Asia watched, eyes following her as they disappeared into the trees. To give Asia a head start, the Blacks decided to give Asia ten seconds.

There was no way a girl like her could outrun a superior Dragon Class threat.

Asia huffed as she ran into the forests, she wanted to have a fighting chance to lose the Blacks as she ran. However, as she glanced back once the ten seconds were up, the army immediately ran in an olympic sprint, each and every one of the Blacks coming after her with serious faces.

"Don't turn your back too soon, Asia! Keep going!" Issei shouted.

Asia perspired, her lungs burning with each heavy breath, as she ran into the forest surrounding the mansion. However, when she looked back again, she saw one Black a step close behind her, his white face smiling wickedly at her.

"Gotcha, girl!" Black said.

"Eeep!" Asia yipped as she tried to run faster as Black's head tentacle turned into a masculine hand in a karate chop form. However, instead of hitting her like he did with Saji, Black lightly chopped her thigh with a gentle thud.

"Tag one." Black announced as the other Blacks caught up with them.

Considering Asia's delicate nature, Black couldn't exactly give her the Saji treatment. It was more of a tag-and-run game to help slowly build Asia's stamina and hone her reflexes. More Blacks started to 'tag' her, either by tackling, bumping or just tapping on her legs while counting the number of times they tagged her.

"It's okay, Asia! This is part of the training, you're doing good!"

"Fight, Asia-chan!"

"Keep yourself close to the ground, close to the ground!"

The spectators cheered as Asia circled around the forest within their line of sight. Asia continued running as her lungs started to catch on fire while the Blacks continued tagging her. She wanted to shake them off, but she couldn't outrun them. She could feel her muscles burning up with each step now as a hazy blur slowly clouded her focus.

One of the Blacks ran alongside Asia with casual speed, scanning her from head to toe.

"Can you still run, girl?" That Black asked upon hearing her pained breaths.

"Y-yes!" Asia replied breathlessly.

Black did not buy that, however. "I know when someone is getting anaerobic, lass. We're calling it off now. Good attempt though."

One of the Blacks morphed his head-tentacle into a hand with his white face plastered on the palm. It was Black's version of a white flag to signal the end of the exercise to the spectators.

After three more steps, Asia finally collapsed to the ground, breathing heavily as her skin was covered in sweat as the ORC and others ran up to Asia. Rover was hopping around as it barked happily around the girl.

"You did great, Asia." Issei approached as he cradled Asia in his arms. He unscrewed a bottle of water and placed it to Asia's lips, which she smiled weakly as she opened her mouth, weakly sipping the refreshment while the others also approached to have a look at her.

"Good work, Asia-chan." Akeno knelt down to help Asia back to her feet.

"T-thank you very much" Asia weakly replied as she made her way back to the house, with Akeno and Issei supporting her.

Asia's performance seemed to motivate the rest of the devils - if a meek human girl could push herself that far, it would be shameful if the rest of them were to give anything less.

Outside the mansion, Black smugly grinned at his quarry.

Yto and Catherine grimly brandished their swords at their bane, standing back-to-back with their swords pointed at him.

"Well, well, two little sandbags instead of one. Is it Christmas already?" Black smugly jabbed at the swordsmen.

The two Knights did not raise towards the bait. They shared a glance and a nod before Yto proceeded to conjure two swords - one wreathed in flames and the other emitting frosty aura, before he passed the latter to Catherine.

"Ohhh, a flaming shish kebab and a popsicle. Are you planning on freeze-burning me? I've been splattered and fried before, and this ain't worth a matchstick or an ice cube." Black continued taunting the sword wielders, wagging his finger at them.

Yto and Catherine remained steadfast, Yto's fire sword burned a tad brighter while Catherine twirled her ice sword for a couple of times.

With a sinister smile, a horde of Blacks appeared and charged towards the two sword users.

"You're screwed, pretty boy!"

"Ready for a fun time, girl?!"

The Blacks cackled as they already started to swarm them with their superior numbers.

"You ready?" Yto asked. He was still nervous about his health since he knew Black would enjoy tormenting them.

"Pray that we'll be avenged afterwards." Catherine replied as they roared their respective battle-cries, both charging into the Black horde with brandished blades of ice and fire.

As the Blacks were about to crash into Yto like a tidal wave, Yto immediately jumped into the Black mass of white faces, his swung sword leaving a trail of flame as he slashed into some of the clones, a few burst into fire while others lost their limbs before their they turned into more Blacks, but on fire.

Some of the clones leapt to the side to avoid the flames.

"Not enough, pretty boy!" The Blacks completely surrounded Yto from all sides, each Black big and small as they converged on the lone swordsman.

"Mr. Kiba!" Catherine shouted. She used her sword to conjure several large spikes made of ice to keep the Blacks at bay, giving her some time to help Yto back on his feet.

"Are you still good to go?" She asked as she pulled Yto up.

"...Yes. Look." the male Knight pointed at some of the clones that were on fire. "They don't heal or multiply."

"Hot, hot, hot, hot, hot!" The conflagorated Blacks cursed at Yto as they rolled left and right on the ground to put out the fires. Kiba did not put his all into his flame weapons the last time, but now after his days of training and preparation, he managed to give the Blacks some payback from turning him into a pinata.

"You're gonna pay for that!"

"Prepare to be our personal sandbag, you ass!"

Although that did not stop the other Blacks from multiplying as even more Blacks, some even bigger and more disproportionately masculine, ran towards Yto with faces contorted by rage, all of them seemingly more driven in turning Yto their pinata once more.

"Little help?!" Yto shouted. He did not think his swords could cut the largest and angriest of Blacks, and they boxed him in with no room for escape.

Watching from the side, Issei could only cringe as he felt like he was watching a scene from a horror movie - a mass of black creatures swallowing their victims into the abyss made by their own numbers, leaving the said victims helplessly reached out for help, only to sink into the darkness by seconds.

"Ohhh. Yeah, he's screwed." Issei straightened his lips the moment he saw the Blacks pounding Yto from all sides, one large Black holding him by the legs and smashing him into the ground repeatedly as Yto frantically tried to cut the giant's wrist off.

Issei watched as occasional flames burst out from the black mass, with Catherine on her own dealing with the other equally surmounting number of Blacks, unable to find a way to save Yto from becoming another on the list of Black's handiwork.

Their situation went downhill once the giant Black tossed Yto to another Black who smacked him to another Black who uppercut him to another Black as that Black smacked him down into another Black yeah, the Blacks were now pinballing Yto in a never ending combo of their own design as Yto yelled every time he was flung. Issei remembered a time when Black through him in the same torture years ago.

At least Yto was on the right track using fire, but his current firepower was only good enough to piss Black off. While Black was seemingly invincible, he could still feel pain, something shared by all Black Sperms in existence.

However, Issei noticed that the sound of battle had gone quieter; he saw one mass of Black Sperms had congregated around Catherine, yet the signs of ice were no longer as active as initially while Yto disappeared inside the other mass of Blacks.

"Err Catherine? Kiba? You two still up? Black? How are they doing?" Issei called out. "...How is it going there!? Guys?!"

His question was only met with silence along with the sounds of sinister laughter from the Blacks and fists pounding on flesh.

"Right, it's already half-way through our grace period, so let's see how well we've been doing so far."

Issei announced from the dining table, his plate picked clean of today's dinner menu while his mouth was still chewing.

"Saji, how was your rodeo?"

"I am starting to wonder how you manage to keep Rover without dying for so long." Saji exhaustively uttered with a face that spoke of extreme enervation. Anyone could see the vitality drained from his husk with a single glance.

"Sheer tenacity, loving care, ingenuity As well as a shit-load of treats and pampering." Issei cryptically replied as Rover barked from the corner, panting with his maw filled with steak, his tail wagging.

"Anyways, how about you two? Minus the painful moment when Black gave you the pinball treatment?" Issei turned his head to Yto and Catherine.

"I believe we've made some progress, however small it is." Catherine replied. She still bore bruises from Black's game of pinball. "Although, Mr. Kiba claimed to understand something about Mr. Black."

"Ho? What did you figure out?" Black asked with a taunting tone while biting a chunk off his chicken drum.

"From my many failed endeavours, I learned that the only way to defeat you is to destroy every part of you until you cannot split off anymore." Yto replied with a small smirk. "Am I correct, Mr. Black?"

"Hah! Five days of intensive beatdowns and you finally came to that? You shouldn't get proud from baby steps, pretty boy," Black laughed.

Yto and Catherine shared glances at each other, and everyone else too - the creature seemed collected at the revelation.

"...I take it you have experience with someone capable of killing you?" Catherine asked.

"Pfff. I'm no greenhorn. Yeah, once I fought an annoying samurai did the same thing once, but with his sword and skills alone. You're shit compared to him, and he's a bonafide human. No magic included." Black reminisced.

The mention of a samurai perked Rias' attention as her eyes sparked.

"And who might this samurai be, if I may ask?" Rias asked with increased curiosity.

Black remained quiet for a few seconds before replying, "Doesn't matter. All you need to know is that the guy can slash me to oblivion. He is that good, no magic, nothing but sword swings. You can swing a few while he can swing a million or more in a split second with technique alone. Consider that as your benchmark for greatness, pretty boy." He pointed his finger at Yto.

Black gained many eyes of curiosity and skepticism when he mentioned a human capable of slicing him to atoms. Rias' eyes spoke of another story instead.

"I see. I will strive to become that kind of person, whoever that is." Yto nodded with a hint of determination.

His usual composure was crumbling before Tsubasa, his eyes darting at random points and blinking slowly and sporadically. Seeing that she struck a critical blow against her coach, she couldn't help but smile with a warm feeling in her chest.

"Okay, you can relax." Tsubasa followed with an amused giggle. "I almost forgot you can be so cute sometimes." She grinned cheekily as she lightly pinched Issei's cheek.

Issei pouted as he waved off Tsubasa's hand off his face, "Hey."

"Still, you feeling better now?" Tsubasa asked with a soft smile now.

Issei blinked at the question - now that she mentioned it, he did feel better, after sharing his worries, exchanging opinions, her distracting (hypothetically speaking) him with the earlier question; Issei felt a bit lighter now.

"I guess I am. Wow." Issei smiled. "Thanks, Tsubasa. For listening, I mean."

"Hey, what are friends for?" Tsubasa smiled knowingly as she tapped her palm on Issei's cheek. "...But seriously, I think you've done well enough. Have more faith in everyone, okay?"

Issei nodded as the two shared a smile.

"Oh, I'm not kidding about the Youkai tricks, by the way. I still want in on that." Tsubasa pointed her finger at Issei as she got up.

"Yeah, yeah, fine." Issei raised his hands in mock surrender as he left his seat, returning the milk carton back in the fridge.

Tsubasa smiled as she left the door, parting ways with her coach, unable to stop smiling at the memory that Issei would not mind her asking him out. As she left the kitchen, she did not notice the silent spy on their way out, hiding in the shadows, sitting with her hands and hugging her knees.

"Your dog really hates your dragon."

The smiling silver-haired boy pointed at the six-eyed dog chewing on Issei's Boosted Gear, dangling with his just its teeth holding onto it.

[I find it amusingly hilarious in my opinion.] The white glowing wings on the boy's right arm interjected.

[Har har. Mongrel. Will you please go chew on the White one instead? I swear he is tastier.] Ddraig spoke from the red gauntlet, egging the growling Rover to go torment his long rival instead.

"Heheheh..." Issei just giggled impishly as he stroked Rover with his free arm. Rover just continued growling as he noisily gnawed on Boosted Gear with increasing tenacity. The kids could hear Rover struggling to bite through the metal.

[Arrggh, stop petting him and get him off! That thing's bites itches every time and worse, I can't scratch it!] Ddraig demanded his host as it continued glowing.

"Hmmm... Nah." Issei shook his head with a mischievous grin.

[Ahahahahahahaha! Ohhh, how long has it been since you have a host that I like?!] Albion laughed at Ddraig with a gloating tone.

"Alright, alright, Rover. You can stop chewing on Ddraig." Issei finally relented and pried the dog off his gauntlet arm. The beast whined slightly but did not resist as Issei held him on his lap.

The two children were currently sitting on a bench in the mansion's courtyard, watching the late afternoon sky in relaxation.

"...Say, where did the old man Azazel go again?' Issei asked.

"Dunno." Vali shrugged. "Last time I saw him dragging your pops, probably drinking somewhere again."

"Sheesh, adults and their drinks." Issei scoff. "...Say, why do you think adults like drinking so much? I mean, I heard they're not drinking anything like soda, or coffee, or tea. What's so good about those... 'adult drinks'?'

"Oh, that. Well" Vali slowly swung his legs under the bench back and forth in thought. "...Dunno. None of the Fallens would let me try it when I asked."

The two children remained quiet with their eyes gazing to the clear blue sky for a good minute, until Issei and Vali broke the silence.

"So, you wanna-"

"I know where Azazel keeps his stash."

Both hosts of Heavenly Dragons shared a glance and grinned at each other as they hopped off and squirreled towards the mansion on their tiptoes with Rover following them behind. They sneaked past most of the Fallen angels here and there, Rover following their lead as he followed closely behind his best friend.

After a couple of floors and reaching down the end of the hall, past the grand mahogany doors which Azazel left unlocked carelessly, Issei and Vali were currently inside Azazel's office.

Vali waved his hand for Issei to follow him with an impish smile as they circled the wooden office desk and he gestured to the secret rectangular case under the desk. he

On the floor, Vali started tinkering the safe as Issei crouched with Rover wagging his tail behind him.

"Can you open it?" Issei asked, seeing Vali turning the combination knob with no success.

"I'm trying. I don't know the password," Vali muttered.

"So why not use your Dividing gimmick?" Issei asked.

"...I wanted to try safecracking."

"Why? To look cool?" Issei joked with a teasing smile.

"Shut up. Fine, Albion, you're up."

Vali scoffed as he raised his right hand towards the safe, his Divine Dividing forming on his back as wings of light glowed in blue and echoed.

[Divide!]

After the safe glowed a dim blue light, Vali squeezed the lock of the safe and forcefully yanked the door open, resounding a loud crack from the safe as something broke.

"Whoa" Issei looked impressed. "What did you do?"

"I just halved the safe's durability," Vali smirked. "Didn't think it'd work, though."

"Neat." Issei looked over Vali's shoulder and peeked at the contents, the various bottles of a myriad dark colors with labels on the glass holding names and words none of them could even register.

"Ohhh, he has glass cups here." Vali smiled as he took out a tray of two glasses and a large bottle with amber liquid inside, and a label attached on it.

"...Looks like something Azazel got from Scotland." Vali commented on the unfamiliar brand on the bottle.

"How'd you know?"

"It speaks Scottish on the label." Vali smiled back at Issei as they got out from under the desk as Vali placed the tray of glass on the floor.

With a very mischievous smile, Vali grabbed the bottle and pulled out the cork with some struggle. His smile fading when he found the cork a challenge, Vali grunted as with a face that looked like he was sucking on a very sour lemon. Issei snickered as he took the bottle from Vali and uncorked it in one pull.

"...I loosened it up for you." Vali pouted at Issei.

"Whatever you say, bud." Issei continued gloating over him with his snicker. "Now come on, let's have a taste."

With a beaming grin, Issei poured the amber liquid into the short glasses around half each.

Each of the kids took a glass and clinked their cups, Rover tilting his head in confusion on what they were about to do.

"For the adults," Issei snickered.

"Cheers."

Vali nodded and they both downed their drinks, but once the liquid graced their tongues, they spat it out on the floor with groans of disgust.

"Uggh!" Issei retched, spitting out the acrid taste of fine liquor as much as he could. "How can they drink this?!"

"It's so bitter! And blegh!" Vali also shared the sentiment.

The wings on Vali's back suddenly spoke out.

[...You boys could have used some ice in that.]

"Albion?"

[Trust me, Vali. I've been inside some heavy drinkers before. Drinks like these are best served cold.]

Vali glanced at Issei who shrugged in return.

"Let's try it."

Hearing his consent, Vali shrugged in return and hovered his hand over his glass, forming a magic circle as it dropped chunks of ice into the amber liquid and he repeated it for Issei's. Issei poured some more liquor into their glasses back to half-full - but pretty much full thanks to the ice's mass.

The boys looked hesitant for a second as they eyed the drink in their hands, but they still downed the glass.

This time, the taste was still disgusting, but the boys found it more bearable.

"Hmmm" Issei smacked his lips a few times. "Ice needs time to cool the drinks."

"Yeah, let me fix that." Vali said as he pointed his hands at their cups, forming another magic circle and fired a wave of cold at their drinks.

"Alright, third time's the charm." Vali said as he picked his drink up and clinked with Issei's glass.

Once they downed the glass, they were no longer retching as their faces brightened up somewhat.

"You know, this doesn't taste so bad. The ice really did the trick." Issei spoke in amusement as he eyed the remaining liquor in his glass.

"Yeah, and this warm, burning sensation in my stomach feels kind of awesome." Vali remarked as he patted his belly.

"Alright, let's try something else. Got anything sweeter in that safe?" Issei asked as he bubbled with excitement.

Vali immediately ducked under the desk and rummaged through the various bottles. He returned with two more bottles, one from Ireland and another one from England.

"Alright, those will do. Give me the Ireland one," Issei smirked.

"I'll take the England one then." Vali immediately refilled their cups with new alcohol.

Downing their second, probably third glass, they smacked their lips as they took in the new taste.

"Ohhh, this has a kick." Issei nodded with approval as he drank his glass empty.

"Hm, this one too." Vali agreed as he did the same with the one from England. Soon the boys began to exchange drinks in their glasses.

It did not take long when Vali suddenly unleashed a huge burp from his mouth, which he slapped close immediately after.

"Hohoho! I thought Vali Lucifer doesn't burp!" Issei laughed in amusement.

"Shut up, it wasn't me!" Vali barked back in embarrassment.

Ignoring Vali's rebuke, Issei took another sip. "Here, check this one out, then." He rapped his chest for a few times and let out even a longer burp then Vali did.

"...You're gross, you know that?" Vali commented with a narrowed look.

"Hehehehe. You're just jealous I'm more of a man than you." Issei grinned as he refilled his glass.

"No, you're not!" Vali pouted as Issei emptied his glass and smacked his lips.

"Oh, yeah?" Issei went under the desk and pulled out another bottle. With somewhat contemptuous ease, Issei popped the cork with his bare hands and started to drink directly from the bottle.

This time, the Red Dragon Emperor literally spewed flames from his mouth. "Ha, and what will you call that!?" He boasted.

"Cheap trick!" Vali took the England bottle and glugged it to the last drop until he doubled over and started coughing. "Agh, it stings! It's burning my throat!" Vali complained.

"Ahahahahaha!" Issei just kept laughing and the boys began to enjoy the light sensation in their bodies.

The more bottles they drank, the more they felt the dizzy, inebriating sensation sinking in their bones. Rover watched confused as the boys started to giggle goofily, throwing the empty bottles on the floor and caring if they break more as they raided Azazel's stash.

"You knowsh" Issei was starting to wobble on his feet, his sense of balance derailed. He was probably on his sixth glass or bottle. "I'b - I've been- I've been watching you staring at Lavinia'z tushie yesterday."

"W-wha-?" Vali, lying on his back on the marbled floor, looked up from his seventh round. "I-I'd-I don't know - what you're talkin' bout." He replied with a hiccup.

"Come onnnnnnnnnnn~ don't tell me you don't have a thing for her." Issei giggled as he hiccupped, drinking another glass, this one from America. "...Crap, we - we're out of ice."

"Mmyeah?" Vali noticed that the drinks were not as cold as before. "Let-lemme"

Vali raised his hands up at the ceiling and conjured another magic circle, but the ice spat up and clattered around him like a geyser.

"D-Did any get in?" Vali asked.

"Naaaah, you mizzed, what a loser!" Issei cackled.

"S-Screw you, I wanna see you do it!"

"Um- Ugh, fine" Issei replied as he steadied himself and pointed his palm to activate his magic. However, unlike Vali, instead of ice, a splurt of red energy spat out from his palm like a light fart.

"Pfff. You zzzuck at magic." Vali giggled as he rose up and reached for a stray bottle.

"Z-zhut uuuup~" Issei fell on his rear, his head rolling around as he felt his eyelids growing heavy.

Rover simply watched the spectacle unfold as he paddled over to the bottles and sniffed the drink, curious of the contents as Issei and Vali started another conversation.

"Sh-sho what do you think about Lavina'z breaztz?" Issei asked as he giggled goofily, his face growing pink.

"Brea- what? You mean her azz?" Vali slurred in return.

"Naw, I mean breaaazzztshhh. Those two big bounshy nipply things." Issei placed two hands under his nipples for emphasis.

"...Buttz are bounshy doo." Vali replied.

"Yeshhh, but her breastsh are better-looking," Issei giggled. "I'm jelly. You get to have her smother you with those bouncy boobz."

"Heeeeyyy." Vali gave Issei the fish lips as he downed the bottle, glugging the rest of the burning bitter water.

"At least you have a good dad well, he looks like a dumb-looking baldy, but he'z good."

"Where'd that come from?" Issei slurred at the out-of-context remark.

"Dunno" Vali shrugged as he drank again from the bottle.

Their moment was interrupted by a rumbling noise, the two turned to see Rover had steadily grown in size, hot steam flowing out from its maws. When the steam hit both Issei and Vali's faces, the former grinned knowingly.

"Aayyy, Rova zeems ta hav' godden' some!" Issei giggled upon seeing the empty bottles beside Rover.

The giant dog only burped/hiccupped/barked in reply, as its legs were wobbly from alcohol intoxication.

oXo

"Thanks for the treat, Azazel. And also, thanks for letting my kid crash at your place."

"Nah, it's fine. Vali can use some company around his age. In fact, you actually did me more solids by lending me your cyborg side-kick and those black dwarfs of yours."

Azazel and Saitama were walking back to the former's demesne - one of his demesnes, after a fun pub crawl.

When they got closer to the house, both adults noticed a smoke rising in the distance, as well as orange lights illuminating the dark sky. There was a big fire to the point of lighting up the night orange in the distance.

"Say, Azazel That's roughly where your home is, right?" Saitama remarked.

"YEAAAAAAAAAH! ONWARDS, O' MOST GLORIOUS STEED!"

They heard a familiar voice echoing in the distance, followed by cries of pain and agony from some of the fallen angel guards and servants.

"Uh-oh." The Scapegoat did not waste any more time as both he and the human rushed towards the direction of the fire.

Lo and behold - upon arriving, Azazel and Saitama were greeted by the sight of the former's entire mansion in flames; Grigori staff and soldiers were fumbling around in the air, powerless to stop the rampaging Juggernaut in a form of a giant black dog with six red eyes. On top of the said monster was a couple of children waving what appeared to be what remained of Azazel's liquor stash.

"...Are those bottles of" Saitama couldn't help but gawp at the prancing Rover running around in circles, seemingly chasing his own tail, and shooting fiery spheres of death everywhere. Rover already blasted himself a charred ring of craters while the flying angels watching the scene dumbfounded. None of Azazel's subordinates could even get close to the two children and their giant fire-breathing dog.

"I wanna dawg just like thizzhhh!" Vali shouted, laughing alongside Issei as he sat right behind him.

Both Azazel and Saitama could only stare at the sight of frisking carnage before them. Eventually, it was the latter who broke the silence.

"...Wanna have another drink?"

Azazel stared at the burning ruins of his now former home for another few seconds before he shrugged.

"You know what? Yeah, let's have another round."

Review and tell me what you think!