CH 32

Nanalee did not know her disease's name; it was described as a disease of unknown origin.

But she quickly understood that whatever the disease was, it was a sure death, a deadly disease.

Every day, "something" would slip away from her body, a feeling that has been going on for a long time.

It was like a crack in the bottom of a glass from which water was dropping a few drops at a time.

It started out as a feeling of lethargy, and she wondered if she had caught a cold or was just tired.　She thought, but after a few days She couldn't even get up out of bed.

Her husband, Rainer, also using his position as a frontier count, did everything he could to help her.

But none of the doctors knew the cause or the name of the disease.

No, perhaps they did know, but either her husband or the doctors decided to keep it a secret from her.

Her husband, Rainer, became busy with his work in the capital, and the days when he came to her room gradually decreased.

However, he cared for her very much and wrote letters to her every day without fail.

He tried to tell her what was happening in the capital and what was going on outside the mansion, even if only a little.

He was not the type of man who usually wore a blank expression on his face, so she naturally smiled when she read his letters.

However, sometimes in his letters, there were times when she sensed that he was avoiding seeing her.

He loved her tremendously. But that is why he is suffering because he cannot accept the way she is heading towards death and illness.

Just as he loved her She love him.

So she didn't want to show him how weak she is now.

So, she tried not to say anything to him, not even a weak word.

She was determined not to be defeated by this inexplicable disease.

All I could do was to concentrate on the sensations inside me, so that the sensation of a few drops of water falling would slow down as much as possible.

She thought, "Can't I do something about it , who is getting weaker day by day?　I t" and as she concentrated on the sensation of the water falling, it may have been her imagination, but she felt that the sensation of the water slipping away slowed down a little.

Since then, whenever she is awake, she always concentrate on the sensation of the water drops.

But perhaps in reaction to that, she always wake up from sleep and it is hell.

When she wake up , her heart palpitates so violently that she can hardly breathe.

And that hell is getting worse every day.

Whenever she is think of Rid and Mel, I feel as if her heart is breaking.

Rid was a very smart child.

When she read a picture book, he understood the words immediately.

And once she read a book to him, he would immediately remember the contents.

He was able to sense the way people looked at him and the mood they were in.

He could do a little physical exercise in no time at all.

She may be a foolish parent, but she thought he was born with as genius .

But when she became ill, he was only "five years old," although his birthday was approaching.

As she lay bedridden, unfortunately, the talent she regarded as his "natural gift" was telling him that she was dying.

And he had a gut feeling that there was probably no way to recover.

No matter how cheerful she looked, no matter how much she called to him, no matter how desperately she read him picture books, his face never brightened.

And then Lid stopped coming to her room.

When she was sad because he stopped coming to her room, Mel started coming instead.

But she was always crying.

When she asked her why, she told that Rid had become rough on her

She hugged Meldy tightly at that time and cried, "I'm sorry and apologized.

She didn't seem to understand why She was crying.

But she could only feel her sadness and cried with her, saying, ", don't cry.

From that day on, Mel came to see her every day.

Perhaps she came here to escape from Rid , who was rough .

Her heart tightened every day.

(Why is this disease eating away not only me but also at the hearts of my precious children?)

She cried and endured every day in frustration.

All she could do was to overcome this resist as much as possible.

One day, after many days of endurance, she heard from Danae, the maid, that Rid had collapsed in the garden.

I wanted to rush to him immediately, but to her annoyance, her body would not listen to me.

She anxiously waited in bed for a report.

She was relieved when Danae reported that Rid had regained consciousness later that day.

However, Danae said that Rid's behavior had changed a little.

The rough exterior was gone, and he seemed very calm, as if he was talking to an adult.

She wanted to know firsthand how he had changed, but she I had resigned myself to the fact that he would probably never come.

However, the next day he visited her inroom.

When he saw her , he burst into tears and wiped his face with the sleeve of his dress.

She was worried that something was wrong with him , so she called out to him and tried to get closer, but her body would not listen to her and she coughed.

At that moment, Rid cried out, "Mother ," and leaned close to me and rubbed

her back.

She was surprised to see the look on Rid's face, which was completely different from what SHE had seen before.

It was as if some possession had fallen from him, he was bright and his old smile had returned.

He gave her hand a strong squeeze before leaving the room.

She cried alone after heleft the room.

She was happy that Lid had returned from the rough patch she had caused him.

And wondered if her death would take away that smile again.　Thinking of that, she couldn't stop crying again.

A few days later, Mel arrived as usual.

She know that brother had collapsed in the garden and regained consciousness, but she still did not want to see him.

However, she was sure that Rid, as he was now, would never give Mel a hard time.

With this conviction, SHE made a request to Mel.

"I want you to go see Rid and tell me how he is doing."

Mel didn't want to at first, but when SHE strongly told her the reason for herbeing "stuck," she gave a childishly reluctant look and went to look for Rid.

It was the day after that that Mel came to see ger.

Mel looked very happy and said, brother read me a lot of books ".

After that, Rid was no longer harsh on Mel.

When he talked to Mel and Danae, they seemed to love me very much as a family member.

When Rid heard that story, he recovered from the mental illness and roughness that she had caused him.

And she was convinced that he was trying to lead our family in the right direction.

She was also fired up about giving up, even though she didn't know .

"I'm not going to give up. ...... Rid is back on his feet, and I, as her mother, will not be defeated by illness or anything else. I will overcame it. ......"

She muttered to herself on the bed, her voice trembling.