CH 34

Qi Han had always disliked the darkness of the night, and he especially hated the moon.

The shadowy moonlight would make him remember the night his father died, like an endless death toll ringing in his ears, clearly and cruelly reminding him of the fact—

In this world, no one would ever love him and give him a home again.

This fact had once been broken by the eighteen-year-old Fu Ge.

Now, it has been restored to its original state by the twenty-three-year-old Fu Ge.

In his short and tumultuous life of twenty-three years, Qi Han had only ever had one lover, Fu Ge. The young Beta had given him so much love and courage, like a soft shell that wrapped his hard but broken pearl in its embrace.

They once shared a small apartment and lived in it for less than two months, but Qi Han regarded it as his home for the next ten, twenty or thirty years to come.

Because Fu Ge thoughtfully put away all the sharp things in the house and used every possible cute decoration to create a sense of belonging for him.

On the first night Qi Han moved in, Fu Ge stood in the living room holding his hand, pointing to a bunch of things on the sofa mysteriously to surprise him.

Qi Han’s name was embroidered on the pillow, there was a bear at the bottom of the noodle bowl, and the letters QH decorated the cuffs of the pyjamas…

Fu Ge smiled and introduced to him one by one: Ah Han’s pillow, Ah Han’s bowl, Ah Han’s pyjamas, and finally patted himself on the head and said, “This, this! Ah Han’s Beta.”

Only true empathy and unconditional love could get these feelings right, and the romance hidden in every detail was genuine and warm.

Between the two boys who were equally lonely and miserable, Fu Ge was using all of himself to heal Qi Han, while Qi Han, on the other hand, pushed him into hell again and again.

So he knew that everything now was deserved.

From the first appearance of the digital planet brooch, Qi Han noticed the anomaly.

Fu Ge never liked digital elements. He would avoid them when painting and even in everyday life. There was no reason why he would like the brooch the first time he saw it, and even take the initiative to reach out to Qi Chuan to ask for it.

So he asked someone to specifically check Qi Chuan and the brooch, and found that he had studied psychology abroad for five years before returning to China to take over his family business. The digital brooch was his favourite hypnosis prop.

Based on this, Qi Han’s first reaction was that Qi Chuan wanted to harm Fu Ge through hypnosis.

But immediately afterwards, he realised that every time Fu Ge’s attitude towards him changed and his memory was confused, it was all related to the brooch.

The young Beta’s memory loss was serious, but after seeing Qi Chuan, he remembered everything.

At first, Qi Han thought it was because Fu Ge received his pheromones and his health began to improve. At the same time, the doctor also told him that Fu Ge would uncontrollably get closer to him because of the pheromones.

But this closeness would suddenly turn into indifference and disgust after Fu Ge stared at the brooch for a long time.

Before burning the sketch book, smashing the rings and carving the bear stamp for him, Fu Ge had stared at the brooch in his room for a long time, but Qi Han didn’t see even a little bit of fondness for the brooch in his eyes. So excluding all impossible options, there was only one kind of conjecture left—

The brooch was not hypnotising him, it was to help him stay awake.

And Fu Ge’s own admission of Qi Chuan’s relationship with his teacher helped Qi Han to solidify this conjecture once and for all.

A stranger would not help him, but what if they had known each other for a long time?

So Qi Han used all his connections to investigate Fu Ge’s entire social history over the past five years, and found that except for the two years he spent working in a cafe at the beginning, his remaining three years were blank.

Someone helped him erase the social connections of the next three years, causing the young Beta to vanish as if he had disappeared from the world, until he reappeared in Qi Han’s life on a perfectly ordinary night.

At this point, all coincidences revealed clues.

Why did Fu Ge rush out of the villa and was knocked down by a motorcycle the day after they shared the bed, but the vehicle involved in the accident couldn’t be found afterwards?

Because Fu Ge needed a sufficient reason to ask Qi Han to come back.

Why did the safe Qi Han had been looking for for over five years but could not find appear suddenly after their reunion?

Because Fu Ge knew exactly what kind of blow the contents would bring to Qi Han.

Why did Qi Chuan show up so coincidentally and so quickly when Qi Han came up with the idea to use another Alpha with the same pheromones to deceive Fu Ge and why did he agree to help without any reward?

Because it was a step that played right into their hands.

And why on the morning when the doctor was attacked, Fu Ge had to postpone the infusion time by an hour and insisted on painting in the garden when there was insufficient light?

Because he knew there was a bone-cutting knife waiting there.

And his relationship with Qi Han needed a major accident as a turning point, so Qi Chuan and the doctor who was slashed cooperated with Fu Ge to perform this scene.

Afterwards, the attacked doctor and Fu Ge’s attending doctor disappeared almost at the same time. Qi Han asked Chen Xing to investigate their entry records and found that the time they were transferred to this hospital was exactly three years ago.

The same year that the young Beta’s social connections were erased.

Fu Ge had never lost his memory from beginning to end, but used hypnosis to disrupt his own sanity, and then returned to Qi Han, tattered and broken, allowing him to experience firsthand what he had experienced back then.

Qi Han should have remembered that his lover was never a weak and vulnerable dodder flower, he was a hedgehog full of spikes, with tenderness and love pouring inward, and ruthlessness and hatred outward at the same time.

He had spent a full three years laying out this trap. Every step of planning and plotting formed a net of steel, and Qi Han was just the ant to be crushed in this net.

But the ant had already sacrificed everything he had.

Including his heart, his dignity, and the short moment of his life on earth; everything had long been in tatters.

Sitting in the empty ward, Qi Han organised the drawings in his hands into an album, turning them over carefully one after another.

The faint orange-yellow light cast the shadow of his hand on the drawing paper, and he suddenly remembered that Fu Ge had also lied to him once when they were still together.

He couldn’t remember the reason for lying; it was probably that Fu Ge did something very dangerous that he knew Qi Han would not agree to. After he finished doing it, he chose to conceal it and asked his friends to help him cover up.

Qi Han was angry when he found out, but more than that, he was lost because he was too afraid of deception in relationships.

His father had been deceived by that woman’s flowery words and had married her, which had led to all the tragic events that followed.

Qi Han talked to Fu Ge for a long time back then, briefly describing that woman, and then asked him very carefully if he could stop lying to him.

“Gege, don’t be like this in the future, okay? No matter what mistakes you make, no matter if you think it is for my own good, don’t lie to me. If something happens, tell me frankly. I will always be on your side and share it with you, but don’t lie to me, okay… I’m afraid of this…”

Fu Ge was guilty and distressed at the time, and hung on him obediently with his whole body, kissing his cheeks and promising over and over again: “I’m sorry, I will never do it again. I promise you that I will never lie to you again. As long as I love you for one day, I will be true to you for one day. Do you believe me?”

The hand flipping through the drawings suddenly stopped. Qi Han didn’t look up, only curving the corners of his lips bitterly, “I believe it. I have always believed that everything gege promised me has been done.”

Then why are you lying to me now?…

Qi Han closed his eyes and answered himself in the bottom of his heart: because the love gege gave me is gone, so is loyalty.

Rolling up the last painting and stuffing it into the scroll, he locked the door of the ward.

If Fu Ge had barged in at that moment, he would have found that this room was full of things related to him.

The paintings he drew when he was young, specimens of his favourite hawthorn flowers, the burnt fragments of his sketch book, the broken diamond rings and the cut blue silk ribbon…

Qi Han called these bits and pieces his own remnants.

They were the only things he could take to his grave after his death.

While Fu Ge was thinking about bringing him down, Qi Han quietly made his own funeral arrangements.

He was not sure what the result the young Beta wanted.

Did he want him to lose his reputation? To make his life worse than death? Qi Han had no way of knowing. The only thing he could be sure of was that if there was such a day, there would be no relatives to collect his remains and take care of his affairs for him.

He no longer cared what happened to him, he just wanted to leave with a little dignity.

The evening breeze was cold and harsh, chilling to the bone.

Qi Han walked into Fu Ge’s ward and covered the man on the bed with a quilt. Fu Ge, who was so drunk that he was delirious, woke up because of this movement, and immediately put his hand under the pillow.

After discovering that it was Qi Han, he stopped abruptly and stretched as if nothing had happened, “Why are you still awake, what time is it?”

“It’s still early. It’s cold at night, let me tuck you in.”

Fu Ge was about to turn on the light, Qi Han held his hand, “Don’t turn it on, it’s too bright, it’ll drive away drowsiness. I’ll just look at you like this.”

Fu Ge smiled, took his hand and put it under his head like a pillow, saying lazily: “You had a tiring day and still not sleeping. Is there a lot of work? Do you want me to help?”

“Sure, come if you want and I’ll teach you.”

Qi Han scratched his chin and suddenly said, “I was looking at wedding venues just now. Is it okay if our ceremony and honeymoon are both scheduled in February?”

Fu Ge’s body obviously stiffened, but fortunately he was hidden by the darkness, “Why are you looking at them at night?”

Qi Han didn’t make a sound, lay down on his side and hugged Fu Ge, saying after a long time: “Probably because of the impermanence of the world. If an accident makes me die now, then after the wedding, maybe my ghost can still have a home to go back to.”

“What are you talking about!” Fu Ge slapped him and said angrily: “Why are you talking about dying in the middle of the night, pooh pooh pooh!”

Qi Han laughed and buried his head in the nook of his shoulder, “Gege, promise me first, ah. Marry me, okay?”

Fu Ge’s voice was chilling in the dark night, “Does Ah Han want to get married so much?”

“Yeah, that’s all I want…”

Qi Han closed his eyes and said softly and gently: “Gege, give me the wedding, and I will give you everything you want, okay?”