CH 78

As Su Chang had predicted, the family drank wine in the evening.

Even Xiang Wan, who was originally treated as a child, drank a few glasses. However, due to her previous experience of getting drunk, she didn’t drink much and remained sober enough to set off firecrackers.

Yu Zhou watched her enter the room with her shining eyes and a flushed face cupped in her hands, her cheeks blushing through her fingers. Then, she said to Yu Zhou in a somewhat coquettish manner, “I feel dizzy.”

“I won’t be able to enjoy the fireworks.”

Yu Zhou laughed at her, “Why don’t you wash up and go to bed then? It’s getting late.”

Xiang Wan shook her head, “There are still skewers roasting outside. I just put mine on the grill.”

After saying that, she blinked and shook her head again, mumbling, “No, I’m really dizzy.”

“Are you still not going upstairs, then?” Yu Zhou leaned on the sofa side and sighed.

However, Xiang Wan gazed at her with drunken eyes while softly asking, “Aren’t you going to help me up?”

Her voice was very sweet, but that sentence carried a hint of aggression to Yu Zhou’s ears.

Yu Zhou’s heart skipped a beat as she looked at Xiang Wan.

Yet Xiang Wan appeared completely innocent as her eyes seemed very guiltless.

“Well,” Yu Zhou’s hand in her pocket twitched, “Then, I’ll accompany you upstairs.”

Despite saying this, she didn’t reach out her hand to help. Xiang Wan glanced at her pocket but didn’t request further assistance, instead opting to walk ahead with slightly unsteady steps, relying on the railing to climb the stairs one step at a time.

When Xiang Wan occasionally swayed her shoulders, Yu Zhou extended her hand to protect her from behind but never touched her.

Xiang Wan suddenly felt a deep sense of loss.

In the past, Yu Zhou wouldn’t have been so cautious. When she didn’t want too much physical contact, her body language revealed that she was thinking much clearer than her mind.

Xiang Wan had witnessed the scene at the intersection, although she didn’t see it very clearly, she could guess what had happened.

Her imagination and logical deductions extended to more aspects, such as what Yu Zhou had done with Su Chang when she escorted her upstairs and stayed for half a round of mahjong.

With a light click, Yu Zhou switched on the bedroom lamp from behind. The brightness stung Xiang Wan’s eyes, she winced and instinctively raised her hand to block the glare.

Seeing Xiang Wan’s discomfort, Yu Zhou turned on the table lamp instead and turned off the main light.

As she was about to leave, she saw Xiang Wan sitting at the foot of the bed, right in the middle, smiling at Yu Zhou.

“Go and wash up, you don’t look like you can take a bath. Brush your teeth and wash your face and feet before going to bed early,” Yu Zhou leaned against the wall as she spoke to Xiang Wan.

“I don’t want to sleep yet,” Xiang Wan stubbornly replied.

Xiang Wan had always been obedient, but today she was a bit wayward, just like when she used to be a spoiled young lady who refused to get out of bed.

She stared straight at Yu Zhou, whispering softly, “Can you lie down with me for a while?”

“Huh?” Yu Zhou was slightly stunned.

Tilting her head, Xiang Wan recalled, “We haven’t laid down together and talked for a long time. The last time we did was in the summer.”

“You’re not very clear-headed right now, Wanwan,” Yu Zhou walked over to her, squatting down before gently persuading her, “You should go to bed early.”

“I’ll sleep if you talk to me for a while.” Xiang Wan looked down at her.

Glancing back at the bed, she continued, “You don’t need to change clothes. Can’t we just lie down clothed?”

The rhetorical question was a bit aggrieved, but she didn’t turn back.

Yu Zhou let out a breath, “Alright.”

She helped Xiang Wan lie down first, who obediently turned onto her side in the middle of the bed. Yu Zhou then walked to the other side, took off her slippers and also got into bed.

Their eyes met, just like they did that summer, the light of the bedside lamp was like an embrace, shining from behind Xiang Wan, wrapping around her thin figure.

Making her look rather lonely.

Yu Zhou carefully studied her eyes and eyebrows. She had grown up; even though just over half a year had passed, she looked more mature and had shed some of her childishness.

Yu Zhou felt a pang of sadness. Childishness wears away over time, ground down by life’s grinding wheel until a gentle and peaceful expression emerges.

She asked Xiang Wan, “Wanwan, have you been living well recently?”

Xiang Wan thought for a moment, “Good… but not good.”

“Why is that?”

“Life and work are all getting better.”

“And what’s not good?”

What’s not good is that none of this has anything to do with you.

Drunkenness made her breathing heavy and her eyes less transparent and clear. Her gaze was a little dim and obscure as she looked at Yu Zhou, like a predator looking at… prey.

Yu Zhou felt a slight chill, not knowing why she had this illusion.

Although she said Xiang Wan was very naughty, she knew that Xiang Wan was actually very sensible, restrained, and extremely intelligent. She rarely showed such possessive eyes.

Moreover, there was a hint of despair in her eyes.

It seemed Xiang Wan had been pondering for a long time before finally using her clear and sweet voice to say to Yu Zhou, “There are some things I’d like to tell you.”

Yu Zhou took three breaths, braced herself mentally before replying her, “Okay.”

“You once told me to move out and find my own life, to look for the answer. Now, I’ve seen it.”

After tossing and turning for several months, she finally understood.

Yu Zhou was a bit nervous, but remained silent.

Xiang Wan said: “You asked me two questions. The first one was that you wanted me to see the forest, the sea, and expand my horizons by meeting a variety of people. So, I did, only to realize that I didn’t need to.”

“Because before meeting more excellent teachers and peers, I had already known Director Peng and Teacher Su. They are all top-tier people, but they have never moved my heart. Now, having seen more, I can only understand one thing.”

Her eyes turned red and her voice became heavy.

She said, “What I saw at first sight was not a stone, but gold.”

“I…” Yu Zhou wanted to speak, but Xiang Wan shook her head with a drunken expression.

“Secondly, you said I had a fledgling attachment to you, mistaking intimacy for love. Now, I want to tell you, that’s not true.”

She gently shook her head, her delicate face rubbing against the pillow.

“Do you want to know how I found out?” She tilted her head innocently and sincerely while her eyes brimming with tears. She moved slightly closer to Yu Zhou, like a seduction.

Yu Zhou instinctively backed away, only for a floating scent to catch her attention. Xiang Wan propped up her body with her long hair cascading down. She leaned forward, seizing Yu Zhou’s hand by her side.

Then she gazed tenderly at her from a higher position.

She was really drunk, her good upbringing and her prideful restraint all gone, leaving only innate haughty and pride.

She looked at Yu Zhou with the gaze of a minister’s daughter, but not one looking at a servant girl, a white rabbit, but a woman she once regarded as a sister.

With a beautiful and priceless voice praised by countless people, she whispered, “In the hotel, I tried to see if I was allergic to condoms. Do you want to know? I didn’t say.”

“Now I’m telling you, I’m allergic – it’s very itchy and uncomfortable.”

“When I found out, my first reaction was to wash my hands, and the second one was… if I need to use this with you in the future, will you agree to me…”

“Not using it.”

Xiang Wan held her hand tighter as she spoke, as if trying to firmly grasp Yu Zhou.

In a way that was both ambiguous and sincere, she confessed her bashful desires. She wanted to tell the woman beneath her that she was not a fledgling and never had been.

Yu Zhou’s wrist was trembling, as were her eyes that looked at her, her breath quickened, which made Xiang Wan somewhat unbearable.

But she could only say, she must say.

With a hint of alcohol, she continued, “The second time, I had a dream.”

In the dream, Yu Zhou pressed her against the couch, where she looked at Yu Zhou with shyness and timidity. Her voice soft and her face red, she asked Yu Zhou, “Can we not use that? It’s very itchy.”

She thought for a moment, but didn’t go on. However, the dream she originally had returned to her mind, making her think wildly and become restless.

Xiang Wan carefully inserted her fingers, one by one, into Yu Zhou’s gaps between her fingers, intertwining their fingers and then gripping tightly.

With the first grip, she looked at Yu Zhou’s lips, feeling a little wronged.

She said, “You told me that if I wanted to kiss you, I could only hold your hand, but…you let her kiss your face.”

Xiang Wan used “her” instead of “Miss Su.”

She felt like crying a little, especially when she saw the apologetic and unwilling look in Yu Zhou’s eyes.

She tightened her grips on Yu Zhou’s fingers and then released them, their palms touching and then leaving, each grip stronger than the last, each more entwined than the last.

Controlling herself, Xiang Wan said to Yu Zhou, “Just ten times.”

“Let me hold you ten times.”

And then, forget about my first impure thought in this lifetime.

In fact, she never thought that anything was “improper” for her because she was also the moon that everyone adored and the pearl in the palm.

The glory should come to her, just as she believed that praising her was normal.

“Wanwan…” Yu Zhou’s heart was almost shattered as she squeezed out two words from her throat.

Xiang Wan shook her head with a drunken look and told her, “Don’t talk.”

If you speak, I can’t promise anything.

Seven, eight, nine…

She leaned down and pressed her lips to the corner of Yu Zhou’s mouth, a light touch like a dragonfly skimming the water’s surface, before saying, “For the tenth time, I don’t want to hold back anymore.”

Her face was even redder, but it didn’t seem to be because of the alcohol.

She looked at her first-ever heartthrob. She was about the same size as herself, quite attractive, very warm-hearted, loved to chatter, and also liked to teach and discipline.

At first, she didn’t have much money but still managed Xiang Wan’s expenses. She would laugh when she was nervous and also when she was afraid.

She loved imagining herself and everyone around her succeeding, but she was always afraid of the blood and gore at high places. She cried herself to distress because of being scolded, but after leaving the restroom, she would bare her teeth and grin while asking Xiang Wan why she hadn’t started sweeping yet.

When she saw the person she cherished, she always liked to stand behind her, watching her back or side profile. When the other party’s gaze shifted over, she would look up at the sky.

When she saw the person she adored, she always placed her overly soft heart in her eyes for all to see. There was nothing else there but heartache, even if she was about to cry at this moment.

Hence, Xiang Wan smiled at her while thinking to herself, “This is enough.”

This is enough.