CH 73

The man just looked at me with shaky eyes, but his mouth remained tightly closed as if a huge stone had been placed on it.

“Seeing that you’re not talking, it doesn’t seem like we had a very good relationship.”

The man neither confirmed nor denied, but that was enough of an answer. He merely turned away with a shallow sigh.

“No matter what relationship you and I had, I am satisfied with my life now. So, please don’t act like this out of the blue.”

Thinking the conversation was over, I glanced at him and passed by.

“How can I–”

At that moment, I heard the man’s faltering voice, and he hurriedly brought out his words as if to catch me.

I slowly turned to look at the man. He stared at me cautiously like he was examining my mood.

“Is there a way I can be by your side?”

“By my side?” I asked back, frowning at his question. He stared at me worldlessly, confirming I hadn’t heard wrong. His eyes seemed desperate for an answer.

I lowered my gaze and stared at the man’s hand. His trembling fingers gave away his feelings. 

How? I quickly shook off my thoughts.

“There isn’t.”

I meant it literally. There was no way. Was there a reason to keep a man by my side in the first place? I spoke coolly and kept my gaze indifferent.

“…”

However, the moment I inadvertently saw the man, my composure was shaken.

The man looked grievous and sorrowful, like a felon who had been sentenced to death.

The man furrowed his neat eyebrows and bit his lip. A faint sound, whether a grunt or a groan, flowed from his teeth as if he was enduring pain.

Seeing the man act as if his whole world collapsed at my words caught me off guard.

My grip tightened on the basket. When I saw the man’s hurt look, words didn’t come out easily like before.

I hesitated for a moment, then said, “Like I said, I don’t remember who you are. Moreover, even if I did, I doubt you’re someone I can trust.”

“…”

“How can I be with someone like that?”

“…”

“Don’t come anymore.”

I looked away and climbed over the fence. Contrary to my expectation that the conversation would continue, the man stood there unmoved. Just like a tree with deep roots, he stood alone on the plain, staring into the air.

It was almost sunset when I thought I could smell damp water from the breeze coming through the window. A while later, raindrops began to fall.

As time passed, the rain got stronger, and I heard the drops hitting the window like a bird’s beak pecking at it.

I hummed along the raindrops and handled the tasks I had received from Grandma Hoenn. As I sewed, time flew by, and the dusky evening arrived.

When the basket full of work was reduced by half, the cat, who had fallen asleep, got up, shook out its legs, and stretched itself until its body shook.

Meow–

The cat meowed, jumped off the chair, and strolled to my feet before rubbing itself on me. It purred as it rubbed its head against my shin.

“What’s wrong?”

The cat raised its head and looked intently into my eyes as if asking for something.

I put my work down and lifted the cat to sit it on my thigh. The cat settled down and curled up on itself, still purring.

As I stroked its fur, the cat opened its mouth and yawned.

“Are you hungry?”

I wondered if the cat could understand what I said because it stopped yawning to stare up at me, but it didn’t respond.

Of course, it couldn’t. I pushed the work to the edge of the table and got up with the cat. I placed the cat on my chair and tapped its nose.

“Hang on.”

After seeing the cat settle and curl into itself, I smiled happily and headed to the kitchen.

“I wonder if the cat has anything to eat.”

Thinking of going out into the city tomorrow and buying something for the cat to eat, I headed for the kitchen and inadvertently turned to stare out the window.

“That person…”

I stopped in my tracks when I saw a man standing outside the fence in the pouring rain.

“How long have you been standing there?”

After talking to him, the sun was still shining when I entered the house, so at least four hours must have passed. It had been less than an hour since it rained, but I wouldn’t be surprised if it went on longer since it was autumn.

Before I could even think of anything else, my feet led me outside. I quickly reached the door and grabbed the doorknob before I hesitated. 

What was I doing? 

I had already decided not to get involved with that man.

My grip on the doorknob tightened so hard that my hand turned white. For some reason, I felt that there would be no turning back if I let the man inside.

Why did he want to be by my side? Contrary to my curiosity, there was a part of me that didn’t want to know.

I could infer my relationship with the man to some extent through today’s meeting—that level of earnestness and tenacity, even the genuine affection overflowing in his eyes.

There was a high chance we were lovers, but the man’s behavior gave me the impression it wasn’t a good relationship.

In that case, I’m sorry, but it might be better not to know. I was satisfied with my life as it was.

Even though we didn’t share a drop of blood, the peaceful days I lived with Oppa were now my world. No matter what my past was, whatever that man was to me…

Above all, I couldn’t ignore my intuition and my conflicting emotions caused by the man.

I sighed deeply and removed my hand from the doorknob. If he were in his right mind, the man wouldn’t stand there until he froze to death in the cold.

Meow–

The cat meowed at me, as if urging me to feed it. When I turned, the cat had completely risen from its spot and stared at me in protest.

“Alright, wait a minute,” I said, chuckling as I turned back to the kitchen.

I put the work I had barely finished the day before into a basket and held it in my arms. I pressed down the overflowing cloth that blocked my view with my chin, fixed it, and staggered toward the door. I put down the basket by the door and felt a strange sense of deja vu as I gripped the doorknob,

I shook my head for a moment when I remembered what had happened last night.

Surely, he wouldn’t be there anymore.

I chuckled and opened the door. I picked up the basket and rushed to work, but I suddenly stopped.

I turned my head slowly, like a creaking wooden doll.

“Ha,” I laughed under my breath.

When the man felt my presence, he leisurely turned to look at me.

The man was far from haggard, so no one would think he stood in the heavy rain. His black hair, which slightly covered his eyes, was soft, and his wet clothes were dry.

The man looked intently at the basket in my hand. He seemed to want to inspect it like he did yesterday. I held the basket tightly and gripped it closer to my chest.

“Have you been here all night?”

The man nodded slowly at the words that came out sharper than expected. Was he always this reticent?

A little frustrated, I sighed. The man’s expression hardened instantly as if he had accepted my behavior.

“Why have you been here all this time?”

“Because you told me not to come back.”

Just because of that? The man was about to continue to speak but bit his lip. After hesitating, he said, “If I don’t leave this place forever, I won’t come back.”

His words left me speechless, and I could only blink. There was no other way to describe the man’s behavior than it was foolish and nonsensical.