Book One Chapter Fifty Three: Otter Nonsense

Book One Chapter Fifty Three: Otter Nonsense

Definitely Bad Guy started flinging fireballs at the falling sharks. Sexy Screamy Spider Lady was ready and firing, and music whipped around the room as Sewer Bard started strumming. Qube instantly cast [Lesser Shield] on the Chosen One, who calmly flicked the lever back into position.

As soon as he did, the water stopped flowing and the sharks slammed into the ground, flopping around in the shallow water. The Chosen One drew his Sacred Sword and plunged it into the floundering fish.

Watching the Chosen One kill the sharks was well, it was like shooting fish in a barrel. Which, if Qube thought about it, seemed a pointless thing to do. The water would do damage to the arrows, and it would be easier to just stab them with a spear. Or a Sacred Sword granted to him to help defeat an otherwise unstoppable evil. Like the Chosen One was.

I dont think thats how the trap was supposed to go, Sewer Bard said, as the sharks turned into loot.

Yeah they really need to lock the lever once it springs, the Chosen One shrugged as he finished collecting the sharks remains. Ill make a note of it.

Do you think its because the Temple is quite new and learning how to make traps? Qube asked, as the Chosen One reactivated the switch. It seems like the mermaids havent been here long. Otherwise the lady on the rock would have passed away by now. Qube frowned as her sense of logic caught up.

Wait, the Golden Prophecy hasnt changed since we were kids. How were we supposed to make the water cry if not by defeating the Deep Ones and using their tears to restore the mermaids homes? And the fishing folk said that they would starve soon, so it cant have been terribly long that the Temples existed.

The Chosen One went and stood before Qube, turning his back to her. Qube shifted his backpack so it wouldnt hit her before climbing onto his back, but continued talking.

Is it possible that shes mistaken? It seems unlikely that the Deep Ones would have explained their weakness to her, and she didnt give us any of her credentials. She didnt seem like a Mage. She also doesnt know that we need to defeat the Water Temple, rather than just restore her city. So its entirely plausible that we would need some other method to actually complete the Water Temple and get what we need.

As the water flooded the room, the party started rising with it. The Chosen One sighed wistfully as Qube pulled against his neck.

I could have saved a hundred gold, he said to himself. Why did I buy you an outfit?

Chosen One, you cant refuse to buy me clothes just because I havent quite figured out how to wear them properly, Qube scolded as they reached the entrance halfway up the wall. Who knows what would have happened to me if I hadnt been kind of wearing the clothes. I could have drowned!

I dont think you can? Chosen One seemed uncertain. He shrugged her off as they stepped through the entrance. I have no idea what would happen if I was wrong though, and I kinda dont want to test it. That is starting to feel like it would be actually wrong.

The entrance turned out to be more of a portal. The water overflowed through, pouring out into a churning river that seemed to have once been a corridor.

Chosen One Qube said. The Chosen One turned to look at her. What do you mean actually wrong? She narrowed her eyes at him as he suddenly looked mildly guilty. Its wrong to test drowning on anyone! she said.

Before they could continue their discussion on the ethics of seeing whether or not you could drown your childhood companion, a giant tentacle lashed out from the foaming water and wrapped itself around the Chosen Ones waist.

He looked at the tentacle in confusion, then at Qube, before the tentacle yanked him into the water.

Chosen One! Qube screamed, as he disappeared under the waves. She couldnt see him! How was she supposed to shield him if she couldnt see him? Without another thought, she jumped into the river.

It was deeper than shed imagined, taking precious seconds to get through the foam caused by the rapids so she could see clearly. From above, muffled only by the thundering of the river, she heard the others spring into action. Sewer Bards music reached her as she hit the floor of the once-corridor, and, as Qube spotted the tentacled abomination holding her dearest friend hostage, Sexy Screamy Spider Ladys bolt thudded into its body.

Be careful! Qube yelled, before casting [Lesser Shield] on the Chosen One. There was no way the Hunter had been able to see through the white waves, she must be firing blindly. The Chosen One was turned away from Qube, trying to stab the giant octopus-looking thing in the head while it wildly flailed him about.

Put clams on tummy! Otto said, patting said tummy.

The Chosen Ones attention was diverted back to the otter.

No, he said, baldly. The otter patted his potbelly harder, flattening the wet fur.

Clams on me! Clams on belly! If enough clams, you get a sur~priiiise~! he sing-songed, using his tail to spin himself in place. The Chosen One screwed his eyes shut. He still looked concerningly pale, Qube noted.

[Lesser Heal], she whispered, and watched with satisfaction as the Chosen One stood just a little straighter.

Thanks, he said, looking over his shoulder at her. But dont waste your magic; well probably need it soon.

Belly clams for a prize! Otto cut in on their conversation. He was now practically drumming his stomach. Bell~y~, pri~ze!

Oh for [fiddles] sake, take the [dreaded] things, Chosen One snapped as he pulled the half a dozen clams out of his backpack and slapped them onto the creatures stomach. Otto sank slightly with the force of it, and grabbed onto the Chosen Ones hand before he could withdraw it.

Let go of me! the Chosen One cried, trying to shake him off.

Otter hold hands to feel secure! You make me secure! Thank you, thank you! Youre pawsome! The clams appeared to have disappeared, either swept away by the otters movement or otters could use pocket magic, despite having no clothes. Which was not exactly impossible. Qube snuck a glance at Sexy Screamy Spider Lady, thinking of her various body cavities, and was startled to see Sexy Screamy Spider Lady practically squeezing herself into a ball.

Its so cuuuuuute! Sexy Screamy Spider Lady practically screeched. I want to take him with us!

Pretty lady, me love you! Otto replied, giving himself another spin, somehow still clutching the increasingly-angry Chosen Ones hand. But me need more clams before me can give you true prize!

What?

Me speak total and otter truth! Me no tell you a tall tail!

The Chosen One stared at Otto in horror.

No, he said. Not puns. Come on, man. No.

Well, me otter here! Bye bye! Otto said and, with a flip of his tail, disappeared into the water. The Chosen One was left watching as the ripples slowly disappeared.

I hate this, the Chosen One said gloomily. Were going to end up with that little [fiddlesticker] in our group, arent we?

Probably, Chosen One, Qube said, putting her hand on his shoulder comfortingly. But dont worry; Im sure well grow used to him. After a pause, she added, Or we could just destroy any clams we find. Either/or.

Thanks, man, Chosen One said, and reached out to touch the Save Point.