Chapter 15

Early next morning, Hong Feng and another servant girl came over to help me put on clothes and freshen up. Aside from deferentially paying respects, nothing else is said. I’m ashamed on the inside — I now finally understand why those “no good” men are especially afraid of their wives — so I tried to find something to say. “Hong Feng, the coat you’re wearing looks nice!”

She gave me a blank look and said, “Thank you, Sir. Hong Feng has been wearing this for four years now.”

I’m sweating. Why do I feel like I’m getting more and more stupid? Don’t tell me that I’m not only flustered by beautiful men, but also beautiful women?

As flattery yielded no results, I won’t be flattering. Cooling down my face and tone, I take out the owner’s register and instruct plainly. “Those boys in the mansion are quite dull. I can’t see anything good amongst them, so you can send them all out. If someone sent them, set them free directly. If I bought them myself, selling them doesn't put me at ease."

“All of them?”

“Yes, aside from the scholarly one I assigned to tutor Yao Jinfeng and Xiao Lu.”

Hong Feng was hardly surprised, seemingly with no fear for the unknown. She promised to follow my orders with a business-like tone, then asked afterwards, “Sir, do you want to buy a new mansion keeper from elsewhere?”

I…

Depressed, I really, really want to unload my emotions on something, but I still have to put on the appearance of cold indifference. “Unnecessary for the time being.”

There’s nothing important today in the morning court, or maybe I should say that none of it was within the area of my expertise or the scope of my interest. As it is springtime, it’s time for the ceremony of planting mulberry trees. The little emperor had to take a hoe and go till the field twice after a few days. It feels a lot like when there was Arbor Day in college, except now there’s no Empress nor Empress Dowager, and therefore no one to symbolize the symbolic picking of mulberries. Therefore, the main focus of court was to choose a candidate for this role. They finally decided on an old woman, the previous emperor’s senior concubine.

Things like this that don’t produce real economical benefit don’t usually hold my attention.

After court, I went to the palace to accompany the little emperor in his studies. The little emperor’s eyes lit up when he saw me, and he spoke in a cheerful tone. “You’ve come, Beloved Subject Zhang. Are we going to learn equestrian archery today?”

Equestrian archery… I can ride a horse, it’s just that it looks inadequate in ancient times? I’ve actually been learning how to shoot for a time in archery class. I only took a few when I was studying in the United States, because it was very easy for the bowstring to rebound and hit me in the crook of my elbow, making it swell.

“No, Your Majesty, today we’re just going to have a casual chat. I will teach you that next time.” Hearing my own gentle tone, I can’t help but be a little suspect that I would have been suitable to be a kindergarten teacher.

The little emperor was a bit disappointed, but he quickly regained his composure. Being a seven-year-old child really isn’t easy; I didn’t have this level of competence when I was his size. He’s proven to be a child born into evil, growing up within a conspiracy. There’s potential here, there’s potential.

“What do you wish to converse about, Beloved Subject Zhang?” Such a childish voice saying such old-fashioned words is so cute, it makes me want to pick him up and kiss him.

What to talk about, though? I’ve never been a teacher. I’ve done staff training, but it’s not the same thing. Furthermore, I have no experience in dealing with the opposite sex in this time period. If it was modern times, I could give him the model of a naval vessel, but in ancient times…

Can I talk about UFOs?

“Hm, are You Majesty’s days in the palace happy?”

“Happy?” He sounded confused.

“Um, how does Your Majesty have fun?”

“Have fun?” He sounded surprised.

Poor kid, uh… what else can I say? “Does Your Majesty find the aristocracy or the people more important?”

The little emperor immediately quoted Mencius, in addition to Li Shimin, “Water can carry a boat, but it can also capsize it.”

Ah, a gifted student!

Has my poor IQ degenerated? I feel like I haven’t felt so powerless and at a loss in at least a decade.

“Your Majesty, ruling a country is not an easy thing.”

The little emperor carefully kept his serious demeanor as he lightly nodded.

Seeing the solemn look showing on his tiny face, I gulp helplessly. So disappointing! I came to talk to a seven-year-old for this?

“Your Majesty, one of the most important things to remember is that everyone has their own selfish goals. What each and every person says to you will not be complete fact. If Your Majesty wishes to understand the whole truth, you must use your own eyes and mind to see and differentiate them.”

What do I want to say about this? I haven’t read Agatha Christie recently!

The little emperor continued to nod in a modest, studently manner, and I’m afraid that I might currently be even more boring than an ancient curmudgeon. Seems I’m actually not cut out to be a kindergarten teacher after all.

“For Your Majesty to govern a country is to govern its people, and to govern its people, you must know the public’s true needs.”

He nods.

“In order to learn of those needs, Your Majesty, how about we find a time to go incognito to see them in person?”

His eyes open wide.

“We’ll disguise ourselves, let no one know that you’re the Emperor and I’m High Scholar Zhang, and we’ll go to the towns and markets to see how regular people live.”

It’s over, there’s no way this’ll end well! But His Majesty’s deep black eyes are already bursting at the seams with joy and expectation. Against such a gaze, I can’t help but eat crap along with my words.

I nearly fled into the wilderness.

Good job failing step one! I’m not good with kids and animals!

Returning to the mansion, Hong Feng informed me that the boytoys that were sent over had left and the ones that were to be sold had already been separated out, and were just waiting for my next orders. I think a little too hard about it, then say, “Well, if they’re sold, they may very well fall into a place that’s less than savory. Supply them with a hundred liang of silver, send them out, and urge them to find something to do for a living.”

Hong Feng agreed. Xiao Lu butt in from the side, “Those big brothers are crying.”

Useless men! My sympathy stops here. This feels a lot like laying people off. I’ve frequently been unable to tell what time and space I’m in recently.

The housekeeper of the outer mansion sent someone to report that Lin Guiquan had sent a gift from the gift list. I brought my bodyguard Yao Jinzi, mansion maid Hong Feng, and booky boy Xiao Lu to go to the lobby and take a look.

Last time I’d said that the arranged gifts were in great abundance, and now there’s even more. An old man with a long mousey beard that looked like a master at first glance was standing there, and upon seeing me, kowtowed in respect.

“Sir, this old one was sent by my lord to deliver this gift, and due to acquiring some new items recently, sent them along for your enjoyment. Please accept them, Sir.”

I first open the tiny case slightly to glance at its contents. It’s a thick stack of banknotes. I unenthusiastically and wordlessly tuck the case away into my sleeve. I also opened the gift list to see that ten branches of Korean Laoshan ginseng, two bottles of rose nectar from Rome, one catty of Arabian frankincense, and fifty bolts of freshly woven wool cloth had been added to it.

I smiled faintly. “Your master’s gone to a lot of trouble.”

After the old man left, I mentally admired the gifts with great interest. The 150,000 liangs worth of banknotes hidden in my sleeve were emitting an almighty burning halo. My heart is in full bloom, as it was not until this moment that I discovered the joys and values of crossing space and time.

The medicinal herbs and spices I ordered to be put away into the storehouse. The two crystal bottles that held the rose nectar seemed to be worth a considerable amount. I opened the lids to take a sniff. One bottle is a light fragrance, a bit like Flower by Kenzo, and the other is a heavy perfume, just like 1001 Nights by Guerlain; I like them very much. Although I’m a man now, old habits die hard. Besides, this man is the male lover of the former emperor. Even if I use perfume, people probably won’t think it’s strange, right?

I rewarded Hong Feng with a gold bracelet. She restrainedly thanked me for the favor, but I can’t see if she’s particularly happy. This woman is truly hard to please!

I look at the big folded flower from Persia made of translucent and brightly-colored light muslin. It’s extremely beautiful, but unfortunately, I truly can’t use it myself.

“Hong Feng, I’ll give you a bolt to go and make a few springtime garments to wear, and the rest will go in the storehouse. Ah, by the way, see if there’s any old cloth in there, take them out, and create spring clothes for the maids and boyservants. Can’t have them go to waste.”

Hong Feng shows her agreement.

I take another look at the woven wool. It really is great material, all in a blue-green color. I say, “Take this to Jinzi and Jinfeng to make a few sets of clothes, along with the snow leopard pelt. Put some fur on every piece, it gets chilly in the spring, after all.”

The scene before my eyes caused me to think of A Dream of Red Mansions, so I recalled something else. “Hong Feng, how much silver do you make every month?”

Hong Feng was startled for a moment. "Ten liang.”

Ten liang, a lot like the young ladies in A Dream of Red Mansions. Yet, would that be a high salary here?

“I’ll raise it to fifteen liang. Jinfeng will also a twenty liang monthly allowance, little kids sometimes want to buy things to play with. As for Jinzi,” I peek at him, “Whatever you need, you may draw from the accounts office.”

His face is still indifferent. So hateful, how can this group be so hard to please?

However, my good mood will not be thwarted like this. I went back to my room to count all the banknotes, and found that there weren’t 150,000 but instead 180,000.

Hehe, that old fox Lin is pretty sensible!

Yao Jinzi is coldly watching me counting my banknotes. I’m rather alarmed, could it be that the previous Zhang Qinglian didn’t care much about silver coins? Is this spilling the beans? I’ve recently gotten the impression that Yao Jinzi already knows something.

“Jinzi, you’re to sleep in my room from tonight onwards.” I’m a little nervous, so I pretend to say it in passing.

"Okay."

No expression, still no expression!

Does he have repressed anger?

I can’t tell. I’m a bit annoyed, and feel like I’m at a disadvantage.

***

Fun fact: The ancient Chinese referred to Arabia as 大食, which means "big food". Why? Uhhhhhhhh