Chapter 227 Behind the Door
As Master Rodion had expected, the tavern became a little quieter. Some of those who came to the tavern only came to take food home, knowing that Allen was no longer there.
Even though it's still one day since Allen left the town, I'm already starting to miss him. I thought I could put up with this loneliness again since I've gotten older, but as Master said, I'm still a little girl who wants someone to rely on.
"Susan, are you daydreaming again?" Jack asked me.
"Ah, sorry Jack. I'll wash the dishes right away."
I replaced Allen's empty position. Every time I stood where Allen was stood, "so this is how Allen saw things before," I felt as if I saw everything Allen had ever seen whenever he was here.
Mom left me
Dad left me
After that, Brother Arthur left me
And now, Allen also left me.
Aaah, when could I overcome this loneliness? Am I not adult enough to hold my tears?
...
"Susan, how is it? Where are you planning to sleep? Are you going to sleep in Allen's room?" asked Rodion.
Susan thought for a while, her face looked toward Rodion, but her eyes looked far past him.
"I will use the other room," Susan replied. There was no way she wanted to sleep in that room.
Susan had already decided to stay at Rodion's place the day Allen left. They had already moved most of her things there.
"What about the rest? Do you want me to accompany you?" Rodion asked because it seemed like Susan wanted to return to the house to say goodbye.
Susan made the decision to leave her house, realizing that she had reached the point of giving up on waiting for her brother. This choice marked a turning point in Susan's mindset, prioritizing her own safety and happiness moving forward. She believed that staying at the tavern was the most optimal option because it not only symbolized her departure from waiting for her brother but also signaled an end to her expectations of Allen's return as well.
For Susan, leaving the house meant she had reached the point of giving up on waiting for her brother. This marked a turning point in Susan's mind, prioritizing her safety and her own future. And she was sure that staying at the tavern was the best choice for her, as now, she no longer waited for her brother only but Also waiting for Allen to return.
"There's no need this time; I'll just pick up the money chest I left behind."
"HAH?!" Rodion was instantly angry. "You left all your money at home?!"
The money that Susan had collected little by little was still stored in a chest, half buried behind the mat of her house.
"How could you leave that much money in an empty house? At this rate, I really have to accompany you there!
Do you think people will just look at you when you carry that chest?!" shouted an angry Rodion.
"It's alright, Master. I won't bring the money here."
"What?"
"I want to give it to Mr. Gorste. You know? The man next door to my house. He's been looking after us since we lost our parents. Then he also took care of me when my brother left. It's because of him that the money is still there."
"Are you serious? Didn't you want to use that money for school?" n.-OVeLb1n
Susan shook her head. "I've given up on that dream. There's no way a peasant can go to a noble school. Plus, I'm already happy enough with cooking.
Instead of that, I have to return the favor to Mr. Gorste. He was in financial trouble. His job was gone, his wife had run away, and his daughter's illness worsened. I can even hear his screams and cries from my house."
"Even so I don't think giving away all your money is wise."
"The money I've collected all this time is really just desperate money I wanted to collect because my brother left. In hope, If I go to the academy, maybe I can survive on my own. But I already have you and this tavern. I don't need that money anymore.
I feel like I'll be moving forward by giving the money to those who need it more.
Hehe, just think of it as a kind of redemption for me."
Rodion saw the seriousness in Susan's eyes; she must want to stay in her house one last time too, "Alright, don't come home too late," he didn't want to disturb her last time in that house.
"Then, I'll leave."
Just as Susan was about to walk out of the door, Rodion called her, "Susan," Susan looked back at Rodion, "You are a good girl; from now on you will definitely become an even greater woman. So just forget your brother, and be happy." Rodion said.
Susan smiled emotionally, saying, "Master, that day, thank you for letting me work here. For me-NO, for all of us, me and Allen, you are the father who raised us. Thank you so much for everything," knowing that she mentioned something a little embarrassing, she just left and ran from there.
'Right, I have to move forward.
Time moves around me, but my time is still stuck on the day Brother Arthur left.
From now on, I will study more diligently with Master Rodion.'
Susan moved on autopilot, her reverie about life making her unaware that she had arrived in front of her house.
"Hahaha, I'm just like Allen," said Susan, who remembered that Allen often daydreamed whenever he accompanied her home.
Susan opened her door.
"Eh? Unlocked?"
As the door open...
Susan's eyes widened in disbelief...
Standing before her was...
An adult man... His hands gripped tightly onto the crate that held all the money she had diligently collected over the past three years. His expression was a mix of shock and despair, mirroring Susan's own emotional turmoil.
"Mr. Gorste?" Susan called.
In surprise, Gorste let off the crate. Making the chest full of coins fall to the ground.
With a severe face, he desperately came forward and then...
He stabbed Susan in the stomach with the knife.
"Mr... Gors-te?"
The knife pierced Susan's stomach, causing a stream of blood to flow instantly. In the same moment, coins were thrown into the air, scattering around her. As she look at the stabbed knife, Susan was immediately aware of the intense pain searing through her abdomen. That single stab seemed to drain the warmth from within her, replaced by an icy coldness that slowly consumed her entire being.
It was then that all the memories of her life flashed through her head.
All her moments with her family
All her moments with her brother
All moments in the tavern
And all moments with Allen.
"YOU UNGRATEFUL LITTLE B*TCH!!!" shouted Gorste.
'Mr Gorste... why?'
Susan held her bleeding stomach; her legs were weak, and her head started spinning. She gradually sat down in pain, and she trying to catch her breath.
'Master Rodion, I'm sorry for being such an incompetent child.'
Gorste removed the knife from Susan's stomach; he held the knife with both hands and pointed it at Susan's face.
"How does it feel?! It hurts, right?! It hurts a lot, doesn't it? But my pain is much greater than yours!" his hands, voice, and lips trembled as he shouted that.
'Brother Arthur, I'm sorry for always spoiling you.'
"You didn't think about me being in trouble at all! You're so ignorant! Even I've been taking care of you and your house!"
'Pascoe and Jack, can I leave the tavern work to them?
"With this much money! You should be able to give me some! What an ignorant child! Ignorant! Ignorant! HOW UNGRATEFUL! You just looked! You never help me when I need it! You should at least give me some money! Help me! Do you think I guard your house just for free?!! HAAAH?!" Gorste threw down his knife, gathering the scattered coins into the crate.
'Allen... I... I..."
"Take that! This is your reward for being ignorant!" Gorste closed the door and ran bloodied out of the house.
As for Susan, with little strength she had left, she pulled her body up to the wall in front of her and leaned against it.
__My house only consists of two rooms.
The front room is where my brother and I sleep; once the door is opened, you will see two simple mattresses made of straw near the wall.
The wall was very cold, but my brother always gave in to me by sleeping near the wall. That little thing is something I always remember every time I sleep___
Susan leaned herself against the wall, now the warmth in her body had disappeared entirely,
'Aaah this wall is so cold; it's so cold that it feels like it's radiating throughout my body. Why can brother Arthur sleep with this cold?'
Her head began to spin, and her vision began to blur.
Her tears fell freely as she recalled her last conversation with someone she cared about besides her family.
'"Allen, I have memorized all your recipes, so you don't need to worry about the tavern. Instead, my cooking skills will surpass yours someday," She said to Allen.
"I'll leave my job at the tavern to you," Allen answered. '
Allen's smile was the best farewell smile she could get when he said it.
A smile full of hope but also sad because of the separation, she thought that she had to realize his hope. That smile made her believe she had to let go of her brother and focus on what was in front of her.
And now she had betrayed that smile.
She would never pass on Allen's cooking skills, nor could she make up for Rodion's kindness to her by becoming Allen's replacement.
'Allen... I'm sorry... I don't think I can keep my promise to you.'
__Every morning
Every night
Every day
I always sat on this wall, looking straight at the door before me. Because I hope
Every hour
And every second
I always hoped that the door would one day open.
And brother Arthur would be standing there, saying "I'm home" to me.
And then I would hit him
And scold him as much as I could
And tell him that he's a fool for leaving me___
The door of the small room opened...
The light from outside filled the room.
Susan kept looking at the door because she could see the silhouette of a person she knew very well from behind it.
'Am I hallucinating?' she thought.
In front of her, she saw Arthur looking at her with a severely shocked face.
"S-Susan?"