In the end, Li Caiyi went to the ice cream parlor in a daze. Even when she laughed and chatted with her friends, Meng Renshu's pale face covered with sweat, kept replaying in her head.
Although she felt bad for him, a part inside her was relieved because she rejected her kind gesture. However, thinking like that made her feel like a bad person.
'Visit (No ve (l)B i n) to read, pls!',
'When did I become such a cold person?' Li Caiyi sighed inwardly. She always put her guard up around Meng Renshu unconsciously.
Li Caiyi didn't want to give him the wrong idea, and she was also afraid of the repercussions.
What if she lost other memories because of her involvement with him? As for now, there were too many unanswered questions regarding her rebirth phenomena, and she didn't want to take a risk.
It might be selfish, but she really wanted to live well this time. Nothing good would come from involving herself with Meng Renshu or his family. She should take some distance away from them in this second life.
Now that Li Jirong was gone from her family, the risk of her or Li Chunhua getting married to the Meng family's house was almost non-existent. It eased her heart terribly. And she wanted to keep that stability.
Meng Renshu had done her a lot of favor, and she felt guilty for turning a blind eye to his suffering while clearly knowing that he needed her help. However, she tried to console herself while telling herself she didn't have any choice.
She sincerely hoped Meng Renshu would get better soon.
With that thought filling her mind, she spent the rest of her day with her friends.
For some reason, the ice cream didn't taste that delicious anymore on her tongue, making her feel dispirited.
***
Her prayer didn't come true because Meng Renshu was absent from school the next day.
Li Caiyi tried to reach him, but he didn't reply to his text or answer her call. In the end, she opted to leave a message telling him to take care of himself.
Forget about replying; he didn't even see her message. Li Caiyi kept checking on her phone, but the lack of his response made her uneasy. It couldn't be that his sickness had gotten worse because he forced himself to follow her that day?
'But that's not my fault. I never asked him to do that.'
Her brain tried to reason with her heart, but she still felt suffocated inside. Nevertheless, she tried to calm down as she waited for the next day. Perhaps he would be back at school by then.
Once again, God didn't hear her prayer because Meng Renshu was still absent from school even after three days had passed. Li Caiyi's guilt intensified multiple times, and she couldn't stand the stuffy feeling in her chest anymore.
"Ugh, it really isn't easy to act indifferent." Li Caiyi whined to no one. If only she weren't the last person Meng Renshu met that day, she probably wouldn't feel distressed like this.
This state of mind reminded her of what Meng Renshu had said before. About how guilt was more complicated to overcome than heartbroken because of love.
Li Caiyi wondered if Meng Renshu had ever felt so guilty before that he developed that mindset?
Be that as it may, there was nothing she could do but send him messages day by day. They were all left unread, but at least it gave her a little peace of mind.
Li Caiyi checked on her phone for the nth time that day with a heavy heart.
Her eyes lit up when she received one unread message from Meng Renshu. She quickly opened it.
There was only one sentence as the reply to all messages she had sent in the past few days.
[Meng Renshu: I didn't mean that, please believe me.]
It confused Li Caiyi when she read that. Did he check on his phone in a delirious state of mind? Or was this message supposed to be sent to someone else?
Whichever it was, she was relieved that she finally got some kind of response from him.
Li Caiyi quickly typed a reply, reminding him to eat well and take his medicine before resting. After sending it, she waited for a few minutes, but he left it unread again.
"I guess he is already back to sleep."
For some reason, there was a sense of emptiness inside her. She wondered what he meant by his previous message?
"Xiaoyi! There you are!"
Li Caiyi raised her head when hearing someone calling out her name. "Xiaohua? And Brother Jie?"
It was rare to see her siblings come to her together like this in school. If it was only Li Chunhua, she wouldn't be surprised, but Li Junjie also followed behind her.
"We are looking for you, Xiaoyi." Like usual, Li Chunhua hugged her arm as soon as she saw her. Meanwhile, Li Junjie only gave her a brief nod.
"Did something happen? Why did the two of you come here?"
'',
"Do you still need to ask? Of course, we will visit Brother Renshu in his house!"
Li Chunhua's response stumped her. Out of reflex, she blurted out, "Why?"
Li Chunhua's brows were raised with the same amount of confusion on her face. "Because why not? Isn't this what we always do whenever one of us is sick?"
Her sister was right. That was a stupid question to ask. Of course, it wouldn't be strange to visit Meng Renshu because that was what they had promised each other since childhood.
Li Junjie squinted his eyes at Li Caiyi. "Why? Did you already have some other plan? Or are you unwilling?"
His question was straightforward, stabbing her already bruised conscience. Moreover, she could also sense that Li Junjie was silently judging her behavior. From their perspective, Li Caiyi was indeed an unreasonable person who didn't know how to be grateful.
'I can't help it! What's with this peer pressure?'
"N-No, I didn't have any other plan," Li Caiyi replied hesitantly.
"Then come visit Brother Renshu with us. It seems his fever this time is pretty harsh. It's been days, but he still hasn't come to school yet. I'm worried about him." Li Chunhua sighed.
"His voice sounds like a different person on the phone. Let's stop by a store first to bring a gift for him. Preferably something to help with his dry throat." Li Junjie added.
Li Caiyi was surprised when she heard that. Not because her brother suggested they stop by the store, but because of something else.
"Wait. Brother Renshu answered your phone call, Brother Jie?"
'ɴᴇᴡ ɴᴏᴠᴇʟ ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀs ᴀʀᴇ ᴘᴜʙʟɪsʜᴇᴅ ᴏɴ NovelB(i)n. ᴄᴏᴍ',
"He did." Li Junjie answered lightly with his brows raised.
"What about messages?"
"He always replies in an hour or so. Is there something wrong with that?"
'Yes, what is wrong with that? Why did I ask such a thing?'
Li Caiyi couldn't define what she felt right now. It was strange how the same Meng Renshu, who used to contact her a lot, now deliberately ignored her messages and calls.
It made her uneasy because she didn't know if that was good or bad news for her. She hoped it wasn't because he remembered another memory from his previous life.
One thing was for sure: Meng Renshu was clearly avoiding her.