"It's been a while since the two of you met. You must have a lot to talk about. As much as I want to give you two some space, my old bone doesn't allow me to move around. How about you take a stroll outside while talking?"
That was Dai Bolin's subtle way of sending them off together with a big grin on his face. He gave a thumbs up to Li Caiyi discreetly to encourage her, but she could only smile stiffly at his 'consideration'.
She sneakily glanced beside her, but Dai Zhiqiang didn't look any different than usual. Both of them didn't talk but naturally walked in the direction of the hospital's yard, where they usually spent time together.
'',
"How about we sit down first?" Dai Zhiqiang broke the silence first. He brushed off the dust on the bench before gesturing for her to sit.
"Thank you," she responded in a small voice before plopping down beside him.
For a good few minutes, none of them talk. They only sat there silently while enjoying the afternoon breeze. It was a very peaceful time.
'ʀᴇᴀᴅ ʟᴀᴛᴇsᴛ ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀs ᴀᴛ No(v) e lBin ᴏɴʟʏ.',
However, Li Caiyi didn't come here just to relax. At first, she felt awkward, but now she felt this chance might be something heaven created for her. She didn't know when she could get another opportunity than this.
"How are you, Zhi? It's been a while since we last talked face to face like this," Li Caiyi started off calmly.
"I'm fine. How about you?"
"Me too." Li Caiyi looked down nervously at the grass near her feet. "We haven't talked much in the past few days. Do you miss me?"
"I do. But I think you prefer it if I don't talk to you for a while."
Was she just imagining it, or did he just sulk? The tension on her shoulders loosened a lot, knowing that.
"I'm sorry. I know it's unfair, but I need time to think about everything calmly."
"I know. And I don't have any right to say anything after what I have done."
Finally, that topic was brought up. This was the chance she had been waiting for.
"Zhi, I'm ready to listen to your explanation now. I kind of have an idea as to why you would do that, but I want to hear it from you directly."
Dai Zhiqiang took a deep breath. His handsome face looked sad as he spoke, "At first, it was nothing but a safety measure. The last time you went missing, I thought how convenient it would be if I could always find you no matter where you were. That's why I asked my colleague to prepare that gift for you."
Sure enough, it all started after the incident on the mountain. But she still couldn't understand one thing.
"Then, why didn't you just say so? I won't be so surprised if I know about it from the beginning. You did it for my sake, after all."
Dai Zhiqiang looked hesitant, but in the end, he gave up and confessed, "It's because I'm too petty that I can't tell you the truth."
"What do you mean?"
He turned his gaze on her. There were a lot of emotions battling inside those deep, dark eyes of his like he couldn't make up his mind. Li Caiyi held her breath to prepare herself for his following words.
"Yi Yi, whenever I see you smile, I feel happy. But at the same time, I also have this dark thought. Something I wish for you to never find out. Because it's an ugly feeling."
Li Caiyi blinked her eyes in confusion. "Zhi, I won't understand if you talk cryptically like that. It's okay, you can talk comfortably with me. I'll listen to you."
Dai Zhiqiang shut his eyes shut before turning his head elsewhere. "No, I can't say it. You will hate me if you know."
The conversation was at a stalemate. Dai Zhiqiang was very adamant about keeping this a secret. Although she was disappointed that he couldn't trust her enough to confide in her, she knew she couldn't force him into this.
"Alright. Then at least, can you tell me what you know about Hu Jian? From how he talks, it seems like he has a deep grudge against you. Did you perhaps already know who he was when I told you how I fell from the cliff?"
Dai Zhiqiang shook his head. "I know this may be hard to believe, but I didn't know then. I knew someone was targeting you and had to do something about it. I'm not sure how this Hu Jian knew me, but I wasn't trying to deceive or keep you in the dark."
He smiled mirthlessly before continuing, "I can understand if you can't trust me after I hide the fact about the tracking device from you. If you hate me, then that's understandable too."
Li Caiyi's heart softened. He looked like a puppy who was afraid of being abandoned. How she acted in the past few days must have given him that impression. She felt terrible now.
She put her hand on top of his gently. "Zhi, I would be lying if I said I wasn't disappointed, but I will never hate you just because of this. I know you are doing it for my sake."
Dai Zhiqiang was relieved. He was prepared for the worst, but this girl was once again willing to compromise for him. "Thank you, Yi Yi."
His previously gloomy face looked brighter now, and it made her happy. "So you didn't know anything about Hu Jian during our school trip. I believe in you."
"I will monitor your movements closely after that. Whenever I see you still in another place besides your house and school, I will go there by myself to check," he hung his head shamefully. "I may seem like a creepy stalker, but I only want to ensure you are alright."
'',
Li Caiyi sighed in exasperation. After listening to that, some of his words that didn't really make sense sounded plausible now. "So that's how you know about me and Brother Renshu going to the beach and what we did there. Also, where I was that night when Hu Jian intruded on our house."
"Yes. I don't want you to see me in a bad light. That's why I kept it secret."
"Zhi, we are dating, but it's still a breach of privacy," Li Caiyi said weakly, without anger in her voice. "I understand you are worried, but I'd appreciate it if you could tell me about it beforehand next time. Being spied on like that makes me really uncomfortable."
Dai Zhiqiang kept his head low like a sinner. He had nothing to say against that because Li Caiyi was right. "I'm sorry for making you feel bad like that."
"As long as you understand," Li Caiyi was at a loss because he seemed sincerely apologetic. "Are you going to make me continue to wear that necklace?"
"No. You can throw it away if you want."
"How could you say that?!" Li Caiyi rebuked him with a look of disbelief on her face. She was baffled by how easy it was for him to say that about something that was filled with their precious memories.
"No matter what, it's still your first gift to me. How could you ask me to do that?"
"But you said you didn't like it."
"That's not what I mean. We can pull out the tracking device, and everything will be fine!"
Dai Zhiqiang was silent again, looking smaller than before after her scolding. "I thought you would throw it away for sure."
Li Caiyi had been patiently coaxing him from the beginning, but what was with this negativity? He was almost like a different person than the usually stoic and stern Dai Zhiqiang.
She was very disturbed by the flow of this conversation. It felt like all her effort were for nothing. Another hole appeared beside the hole she had buried; she felt hopeless. The anxiety that she kept suppressing inside was about to overwhelm her.
"Zhi, did something happen to you? Seriously, why do you keep taking everything to the extreme? Is that how you viewed me all this time? An unreasonable and heartless woman?"
Now it was his turn to be baffled by the sudden accusation. "Of course not! You are the kindest person I have ever met. I would never think that way about you."
"Then why do you keep saying things like 'You will hate me' or 'You will leave me'?" Li Caiyi blurted out in frustration. "I was the one who had to wait for you and be patient, so why are you giving up so easily?"
She felt like a fool for working too hard. Dai Zhiqiang was gentle and never intentionally wanted to hurt her or do something she didn't like. But his passive attitude while they talked disheartened her.
"That's not my intention," Dai Zhiqiang didn't know what else to say. Li Caiyi looked so upset, but he could only sit there without comforting her. He felt pathetic whenever he compared the enduring expession on her face to her lively one when she talked with Meng Renshu the other day.
Dai Zhiqiang was jealous and aggrieved, but he didn't want her to know. What if she got tired of him more than she already was?
Meanwhile, Li Caiyi felt even worse, seeing how he didn't even try to convince her. She was so troubled by this problem that she even took the first step to approach him, but he was still like this. It was so upsetting she could cry.