Going through the five painful years and through the rebirth felt like forever for Jin. The distance between the brothers felt so wide and unforgiving, but now...
He felt as if he could hear the rumbling of those cracks closing up. His brother had never truly lost his humanity and coming to this realization made a sense of peace prevail in his heart.
"I really missed you..."
Jun felt his eyes ache. For several long moments, he couldn't believe that what he felt was impossible until now was mending right before his eyes. He felt his heart palpitate with the hope of his forgiveness. "Do you...forgive me?"
Jin lowered his gaze. "There are things I still feel hurt about. Shui's importance in your life, your disbelief for me and the wedding day...it still hurts to recall that hatred in your eyes."
Jun felt his heart sink.
"But...meeting you today also showed me my ugly side. Until now, I misunderstood you that you had that stopped caring for your family. I also didn't believe that you could never think about disrespecting Great-grandma like that. So...I have also failed as a brother. If everything was a setup, then I also fell into the trap. In a way, I am also guilty. That night, you said that you would gladly take my bullet. But I don't want to kill you, Bro."
He softly chuckled as his eyelashes got wet. "The only thing I ever wanted - whether in the past life or this life - was to have you back in my life."
Jun trembled.
"I wanted you, who were lost in your life, to come back to us. That's why..." his voice shook, "I tried so hard to bring you and Shui together in this life. I didn't want you two to break up even though I knew how the past life was. I thought that this time, I will definitely do something to unite you with her because if Shui was by your side, then you would never leave me. You would never hate me. As long as Shui was by your side I won't ever lose you again. So actually...I was selfish with my reasons in bringing you two together. More than your happiness, I was trying to protect mine."
Listening to his true intentions shook him hard. He gently placed his palm on his head. "You have every right to be selfish, Jin. After how I behaved in the past, this selfishness is nothing."
Jin slowly lifted his gaze and peered into his dark brown eyes. "Bro. For once, I can forgive you for everything that happened. But how am I supposed to forgive you upon learning that you had killed yourself in the past?"
He froze.
"You lied to me when I asked you that night. When Zhou Ai was at Liu villa, she told me about your death."
He couldn't answer him. He had asked Ai to keep it a secret, but it seemed like she had already spilled the beans.
Jin gritted his teeth and shook his hand off. "Why are you silent now, Bro? You really killed yourself? I cannot believe you...you actually committed suicide!"
"Jin..."
"No, don't say anything more!" He exclaimed. More than fury, there was agony in his voice. "How could you think of ending your life like that? You are my Bro. I always treated you as the strongest. Killing yourself like that..." he threw accusing glares at him, "how could you treat your life so lightly?"
"Then what should I have done, Jin?" He faced him, helpless and distraught. "How do you suppose I should have lived my life after killing you? You died right before my eyes. I saw Mom taking her last breath in front of me. She looked so helpless and sad when she l-looked at me the last time. She was defeated. And it was her own son who defeated her..." he broke down as he laughed in sorrow at the same time.
"Dad...He didn't move an inch from his place. He kept holding onto Mom's hands and was staring at her unblinkingly. I saw his tears but he never blinked once. His beloved wife died, Jin. He was alive, but he looked more dead than anybody and I was the whole cause of it! I just didn't kill you and Mom. I killed everybody's happiness that day! The entire Liu family perished that day...Mom was what held everybody together. I snatched the whole support system. Tell me, Jin..."
He tiredly said, "What face had I left to be alive anymore? Wouldn't I be shameless to live on? I wanted to punish myself. Everything crumbled because of me. I had no right to continue breathing. My death still didn't feel enough to compensate for my sins. But it was the only way I could think of asking for everybody's forgiveness. I know it was cowardly, but..."
"I don't want to know anything. I still won't forgive you for this!" He clenched his fists.
Jun paused and then softly chuckled. "Ai was also mad at me like this. She refused to talk to me. You two are very similar in many ways."
That was the last thing Jin wanted to hear in his life. His expression turned ugly. "Don't compare me to that annoying woman! I am nowhere like her."
"But the truth is the truth."
"I get it. I don't need to stay here anymore," he sneered.
Jun grabbed his hand and stopped him from leaving. "Jin. Thank you..."
He said nothing.
"To be able to talk to you like this after so long...finally feels like everything is becoming like how it was supposed to be."
Jin's gaze softened. The past was painful. But this was the present. When it came to Jun, he wanted to move on, but the thorn that kept him from doing this had left a deep scar.
But today, he felt that scar healing.
"Yes," he simply replied.
The door then suddenly opened and a certain woman stumbled inside.
The two brothers - "..."
Ai looked up and stared at them, and they stared back at her. "Hello. I totally didn't hear anything you two said."