Chapter 143 – Planets

Chapter 143 – Planets

---Was thinking about doing a Halloween themed chapter but didn't have the time for it, so here's the art and a little snip bit that would've been used.

"D-Damn it Petra! This is way too short!"

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“Heh, that’s a you problem Ikarus”

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“I’m not a big fan of mine as well”

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“Are you two serious!? At least you don’t have a cow screwing you over like this”

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"Miss Ikarus and miss Petra! I'm so happy I get to serve the two queens again!"

Oh God. Remember that maid how happened to hear me and Petra during the boob incident? Of freaking course, she's back again, not sure why I'm surprised seeing that I knew she was in here already... Hang on, is that my old maid dress!? Petra, you naughty vixen. I know that she needed a uniform but still, that was mine! Wait, I don't even care though...

I'm pretty sure I've neglected describing the elf's appearance, she's would be considered a stunner if you're into curly blonde hair and blue eyes. And large breasts as well but I think that's because she goes braless. I'm probably being a little harsh but I already know what's about to happen...

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Anyways, she's just given us our breakfasts consisting of an egg tart looking thing, we obviously still get fed well due to leader privileges after all of course but this is a little disappointing to the normal cake diet I enjoy so much. The best kind of eggs always come from my bottom after all but those always end up as omeletts as even Petra enjoys them.

"Heh, nice to see you again Eve. I'm going to assume you heard us again?"

"Hehe, don't worry about it! There's a reason why Marcus has personally assigned me to you two! My lips are sealed..."

Oh yeah. Due to the snow and all volcano stuff, she's basically living inside the leaders' house alone with us. Most people prefer to sleep where they work at the moment, mostly down to do with the heating situation more than anything else. We can easily afford to heat places that can house loads of people but it's impossible to keep everyone warm if they were all to remain in their homes. That's another reason why the mines have been so packed as well, heat get easily trapped down there so it's perfect for living through this.

"...Although, you may want to use something else other than rope next time. It can sometimes leave a mark and you don't want anyone knowing about that! I even have some softer cuffs if you plan on doing it again. If you don't care about marks at all, I even have a whip somewhere! If I can remember where I put it..."

...

I have no words. This woman is just, it's a good thing Petra likes her so much. Imagine having a maid like this.

"Heh, we'll definitely keep that in mind then. You hear that Ikarus, Eve has a whip we can use"

"*Sighhh*... I'm going to kick both of you outside naked in the snow in a minute..."

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(Garry) "Idiotic bastards! Move your arses!"

(Jaxon) "Yeah, we're not running a daycare for you layabouts! Get a move on!"

We've gone to pay a quick visit around the settlement looking to help and in one of the main chambers of the mine resides both Garry and Jaxon shouting at some workers for taking a rest. I can now imagine both of them wielding whips down to Eve being a huge pain in the arse, the miners deserve no sypathy though. All of them look guilty as sin.

The mines themselves have basically become a massive hub for farming and residential right now with any labourers having to switch up their jobs accordingly to accommodate for everyone. It wouldn't surprise me if mining activities have completely stopped due to the production of filtration systems, gasmasks and heaters but surviving always comes first. We're going to get through this without a single person dying from the ice age, mark my words. Then, we're going to get revenge on the bastard God who did this... Or Denver if he set it off for an evil reason.

(Ikarus) "Do you need two need help with anything?"

"What? Oh, apologies lasses but there isn't much for you to help out on"

"The gnome's right, we already rely on the two queens way too much as well so asking for anymore is disgraceful"

'This settlement really doesn't need us... it makes me strangely proud'

Heh, to think we've made this settlement so self-reliant that even our help is getting turned away. This isn't the first time today this has happened already.

Before visiting here, we already visited Marcus and Ariza, both of them didn't need anything either. Heck, even Penelope over at the Magi guild was fine. The mages themselves are pretty arrogant when it comes to receiving aid so they've been dealing with this crisis separately. The Adventures are the opposite though, they've been giving assistance underground to everyone for the most part.

Now that the workers who have just been disciplined and the two others have made a move on back down into the deeper areas of the mines, it's up for us to decide what to do and honestly, Petra is similar to me when it comes to this sort of thing. We really have no normal hobbies and I'm not exaggerating!

"So... what do we do now then Petra? I'm starting to feel like we need to find something really mundane to do with or without each other"

"Heh, can think or something that's always great to do together if you catch my meaning Ikarus"

...

Okay, at least that confirms it, a bored Petra equals a horny Petra. I'm more than happy to do it with her every night but still, we can't be doing it every second of the day, right? Should probably mention that seemed to be a joke but I'm not completely sure...

"*Sighhh*... all you can do is think with your pants right now. Seriously though, what should we do?"

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"Do you two happen to have an open relationship by any chance?"

...

"*Sighhh*"

Why the hell can't dryads just be freaking normal!? It's the same thing with dragons, why can't some of them just be normal? We don't want a threesome with some stranger, end of!

We're struggling to decide if Aesa would be pushing it and now, we've got that pervy maid listening in on us and another sex fiend dryad around! At least Petra can hide her jealously this time around but these types of things seem to happen to us more than other people. Me and Petra are pervy enough for each other with no further additions.

"No. It seems a little personal to be asking something like that"

"Yes! Thank you Petra! Is it dryad DNA to want to hump everything in sight or something?"

Our response takes the dryad back a little, I really don't think that's what she was implying now.

"Apologies if I offended you two, but that wasn't what I meant. The question about open relationships only exists because on how the relationships with the roots and trees work, the concept of humanish relationships always confuses me a little so was seeing how you two do things"

Eh? Okay, this dryad is definitely a tad odd. Is this how they're actually supposed to be but Ria is so freaking odd, we assumed she wanted to hump us?

Despite this, both Zeki and Ria have started moaning.

"Oh great, your sister is talking about trees again cow"

"He's got a point Leah, it's so boring! All you ever do is talk about them, why not talk about sex or something else?"

The visiting dryad almost looks to burst a blood vessel from those two, that vain on her forehead doesn't look great as well.

"Are you seriously lecturing me about having a thing for trees!? Ria, everything you do is completely unnatural to how dryads work, but I let it slide because it makes you happy. You keep forgetting our entire purpose is to protect the forest"

"But it's so boring! Why would I want to deal with boring trees when I can clap Zeki's ass?"

(Zeki) "I hate you so much..."

I can't help but start to chuckle now, this is like a conversation between a lecturing mother to her daughter and Zeki's caught up in the middle getting his cheeks clapped! Female Zeki really is a joy to have around.

(Petra) "Heh, we're all for making Zeki uncomfortable around here but is there any reason you've come to visit us dryad?"

"I'm just surveying different regions effected by the volcano to see how much devastation has occurred. There will unfortunately be a load of tree casualties from this but thankfully, the clouds haven't passed the mountains or the gigantic river. It's only effecting the elven continent right now"

"Wait a second, this ice age is only affecting this region? What kind of unlucky bullshit is this!?"

Maybe my reaction was a little unhinged but what kinda of crap is this? The ash and snow only affect us, the dwarves and the mostly inhabited parts of the elven lands? This is barely going to effect the entire world at all!

"Heh, are you really complaining about the entire planet not being covered in a layer of snow Ikarus? That volcano is magical in nature and this sort of thing happened last time as well, just a fair bit bigger though"

(Leah) "Wouldn't say the rest of the world is fine. The temperature in every continent except the desert has fallen a fair amount, obviously not to the levels of over here or last time though"

"I stand corrected then"

It's the magic excuse once again, what a surprise.

"You say it's magic but in all likelihood, it's probably that kid jarl setting off the volcano early causing this. Of course I'm conflicted about this Petra! I never claimed to be a saint or even good person so I'm going to be pissed!"

It's so freaking petty, right? We have to deal with this shit but a good portion of the world have only gotten away with it getting a little colder. We're definitely going to have words with the kid once the ice and snow melts, we could just fly now but I still feel like it might be risky to leave our people in this situation.

"Heh, fair enough Ikarus. I'll help you freeze over the rest of the world then"

Funny Petra... it's odd that wasn't a complete lie or joke though. Would I actually be able to turn Petra to the dark side with me though? Maybe, but let's throw that thought away... for now.

"It was nice to speak with you two but us three should probably be off now. I've still got some more lecturing to give to Ria and Zeki said he wanted to help out"

"I didn't offer to help; it's just so freaking boring being stuck underground without burning or making something bleed. Moaning at the cow sounds more appealing"

"Love you too, girly boy! You're so getting pounded tonight Zeki..."

This kids, is what an extremely healthy relationship is like. They are so perfectly matched for each other; I might make it a goal they get married before me and Petra... Ha! We'll make Zeki a bride as well, might have to bribe Ariza for a potion or two but that's definitely a stupid idea I hopefully won't forget...

(Leah) "Regardless, we've still got some stuff to do. It's time to go grab some samples of the soil in the northern areas"

"Zeki, please use your breasts as a lethal weapon and knock me out so I don't have to do this"

"Hell no cow! You're on your own..."

And so, the three who could cause an earthquake from falling over leave me and Petra alone in this part of the snowy settlement. I've got to stop making boob jokes but damn it, such a thing is impossible when you could see them from orbit... I'll let myself out now.

"What a weird encounter Petra. Who do you think is the weirdest out of them three?"

"Heh, is it really fair for us to describe others as weird Ikarus?"

"Of course it is! We're like the lesbian leaders of the weirdos... what the bloody hell is going on over there?"

Over there in the snow, something seems to be moving...