Chapter 178 – Wedding Mishaps

Name:Reincarnated as a Phoenix Author:
Chapter 178 – Wedding Mishaps

---I'm saving all the wedding AI for the next chapter as it'll fit a little better with the theme of it. You'll understand a little more reading this one first...Updated chapters at novelhall.com

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"Uh, nearly done Ikarus. Take a look now and see for yourself"

"Do I have to? Can't I just walk down the aisle blindfolded?"

The big day, the day I sell myself into slavery towards my fellow lovebird and Ariza has thankfully taken it upon herself to help me get ready. Pretty sure the dryad is helping Petra get ready wherever those lot are staying; pretty sure I've purposely not been told simply because it's inevitable I'll run off and look for her.

We're currently at an inn close by to the church and I'm cranky more so down to a slight hangover and starvation, apparently I wasn't allowed to eat breakfast because it could make me look puffy or something stupid like that. I guess I still ate something but that was only rabbit food, or salad, it's still not a viable alternative!

"Uh, you look great though Ikarus. You're going to have to look at some point"

"*Sighhh*... fine, might as well rip the embarrassment off like a band aid..."

Finally plucking up the courage to look in the mirror, what presents me is something I really didn't want to see. Bride Ikarus has finally become a thing and all I want to do is unalive myself now.

"...Hey Aesa, can you please find some way of ending my existence? Get a dagger and stab it right in there nice and deep?'

"Ikarus needs to stop thinking of easy solutions like suicide, this is only a one-day thing"

"Uh, suicide Ikarus!? It can't be that embarrassing wearing a wedding dress, right?"

"You two both have no idea..."

Ah right, Aesa is here in person helping Ariza get me into this dress and the rest of the outfit, should also mention the both of them two are all ready and dressed up for the big day. Eh, at least Petra's going to like how I look, only silver lining about this stupid piece of clothing I suppose.

To actually describe the wedding dress, imagine something cute as hell with a high neck, long sleeves, an oversized bow, a frilly vail, I'm even wearing freaking tights under this! I guess it's not exactly modern looking but I'm pretty sure this is something Petra would've preferred?

Eh, it pisses me off because of course, cute outfits rather than sexy outfits always suit me more. I don't think it would have made any difference on what dress I was given regardless on preferences, guess last night and this has made me realize I still have a percentage of guy left in me. Of course, in could only be a point of a percentage though.

While those two are helping get the finishing touches and I really have no idea what they've even doing, might as well make some more conversation going on.

"Hey Ariza, what did you lot end up doing for the hen do anyways? Ours ended up being pretty wild"

"Just out for drinks really but things did also get a little strange. For example, Penelope brought her pet rock for some reason, Charlotte had a tiny sip of alcohol and ended up red the entire evening, she even started praying hoping that Nathan wouldn't be asleep when she got to the inn..."

'Huh, guess their evening was as wild as ours. Wonder if the knight managed to survive the inner succubus coming out?'

"...Then, Ria drunk a little too much and decided she was going to strip for us all as well. Your mother and Mute were the only normal ones that evening thinking about it. As for Petra, she may kill me for saying this but she was hugging that plushie of you all evening"

Petra's was hugging that plushie of me all evening!? Man, that's so freaking adorable... wait, I hate that damn plushie! Eh, maybe I can accept it if I'm not nearby, she needs her Ikarus fix as much as I need my Petra. I mean, I was also hugging her plushie in bed last night but it's nothing compared to the real thing though.

"What about your evening Ikarus? Remember you didn't want to go but did it end up okay?"

"Eh, guess it turned out alright except for the fact there was a literal hooker on the table showing her breasts off to everyone. Bet Dionysus had a fun night but Zeki really shouldn't have done that"

Don't get me wrong, it added something new into the evening but that was kinds of fluster I'm not for. Hopefully, Petra never finds out about that because I could imagine her trying a stripper persona if she knew how much that embarrassed me last night. At least it would be good kind of embarrassment, I guess.

Probably shouldn't have said about the woman considering Ariza's face now though.

"Uh, he what!? Zeki hired a hooker!?"

"Yeah, she was mostly doing a strippers job but when she tried to get us to eat and drink of her partially naked body, that's when things really got uncomfortable"

"What!?! That little shit..."

This might actually be the first time I've seen sheer anger on Ariza's face, she's been mad at Zeki before but this might top the iceberg. He may have gotten away with it if she was only a stripper but the fact things could've gone that far speaks volumes.

"...When this is all over, I need to have some serious words with Loki... Anyways, think we're all done now Ikarus"

'Damn! She's got the same exact idea as me, Ariza's wrath is seriously underrated!'

"So, can we leave now then? The church is in walking distance, right?"

I mean, I can walk while wrapped head to toe in bridal crap, right? I don't need some fancy carriage or stupid ride to the church but by the sounds of it, that's happening regardless.

"Actually Ikarus, we've kinda got to wait for the carriage. If you look outside, you'll understand why"

"Surprised Ikarus didn't notice that, Aesa noticed it immediately this morning"

Heading to the empty inn tavern area and looking outside one of the blurred windows, what presents me is faded faces everywhere. Checking another and another, this entire inn is surrounded with queen worshippers! Fuck's sake! I knew this was going to be a problem months ago but still.

"How the fuck do they even know where I'm staying? I swear this may be the day I decide to embrace evilness, motherfuckers are going to make me late to my own wedding!"

"Uh, it's like this everywhere Ikarus. It doesn't help Marcus decided to make this a national holiday as well so everyone's off searching for a quick glimpse at the brides to be. I wouldn't blame them too harshly"

"Of course it's freaking Marcus, should've just made all the idiots work today. Guess we're going to have to wait for a little while"

Ariza suddenly switches into a deadly serious mode and takes control of this situation caused this idiotic bird brain of mine; I actually hate myself right now.

"Don't worry Ariza, Aesa has her"

"Affirmative Miss Ariza! I'll stand guard and won't allow anyone to get close!"

Ariza rushes off closing the door just leaving just me and Aesa alone now. I'm not sure if being left alone with my clone is the best of calls right now but at the moment, there's no way I can get up and go through with this. I'll fall flat on my arse if I get up.

"F-Fuck! Why the h-hell did this have to happen now? It's b-been so freaking long Aesa!"

"Ikarus, stop it and focus. Listen to Aesa, recollecting on the past won't change anything so continue focusing on the breathing"

Still listening and being hugged by Aesa, I try to focus on my breathing again but it still doesn't seem to be helping. I'm sure I had this immense feeling of dread once when I was a child back on Earth but I really can't remember when or why it happened... Ikarus, ignore everything else and just focus for now.

Thankfully, it takes a little while but I start to feel like the breathing is getting back under control, but the hotness and shakes still persist. However, something else catches my attention when the door slams open.

"Ikarus!"

Absolutely taking me back entering the carriage, Petra enters looking like a literal white Goddess in that dress of her.

Unlike mine, hers is a tad more modern looking but still keeping the slight medieval theme in this world. It also has a high neck and shows off just a little bit of cleavage and shoulder, gloves that complement the slimness of her arms and a tiara topped wedding veil sits upon her gorgeous head as well. She could've been a princess in another life with how beautiful she is, it honestly makes me want to cry.

Joining in the hugging embrace, Petra almost looks like she's about to cry when she places her hands on my cheeks and looks me dead in the eyes. Obviously, Ariza has just told her I'm in the middle of a panic attack and she's hurried over from wherever she was. I think seeing her has calmed me down completely now though.

"Aesa, can you go to Ariza and tell her we're not going through with thi-..."

"N-No! We're not cancelling this b-because of me Petra. You'll drag me down that aisle dead before we stop this!"

"Ikarus, please don't force yourself for my sake. We can always do it another day or even if you've changed your mind, there's absolutely nothing to worry about"

Without giving it a second thought, she's willing to cancel all of this just because of a slight panic attack? Okay, there's no way I can even compete with that love of hers she has for me if she's this serious.

"But I want to do this! It's just, there's too many faces around Petra, they're just everywhere almost like they expect something from me. I don't get it; I could destroy them in a split second yet all those joyful eyes are making me feel sick"

Even just when Petra opened the door, I caught a glimpse of some more of the crowds behind the area the guards are trying to police. It's freaking anarchy right now, why do these idiots have to love us so much? We don't do anything for them!

"Then we'll do it again another time with no guests Ikarus. Heh, you can even take your frustration out on the crowd if you like, throw a few nukes and that will definitely make them scarper"

I'm so freaking thankful she can make jokes at times like this. No, that's not sarcasm, it helps more than words can describe since I'm pretty sure I'm back to normal now. Well, normal is subjective anyways...

"We're doing his Petra! Just, give me a blindfold and some earplugs or something until we get into the church, I'm not being serious but will take it if you have any"

"Heh, sorry Ikarus but I don't carry that stuff around with me"

"Oh well. Before we head out though, just let me do one more thing as well..."

Despite the hugs now being over and everything a little calmer, there's someone who really deserves more credit than I ever give her. I'm honestly shocked my system was able to help so much there.

"...Thanks Aesa, you really have no idea how much you helped. Is there anything I can get you or anything you want as a favour?"

"Unnecessary Ikarus, you panicking effects Aesa as well but it's perfectly fine. Aesa doesn't need anything so go and get married already..."

[<...Maybe Aesa will come up with something if Ikarus really cares but now's not the time>]

'Ah, fair enough'

Finally plucking up enough courage and exciting the carriage with Aesa and Petra, I'm immediately blinded by the midday sun and fear settling in once again. At least this area we've arrived at has been fenced off but every direction besides this bit is packed full of onlookers. It's even making me feel claustrophobic despite people not actually being in the way.

"We love the queens!"

"Aren't they meeting each other a little early? Ah, who cares about all that, we love you both!"

"Please, be godparents to my child!"

Like earlier, my nerves are starting to sky rocket listening to the crowd when Petra tightly grabs my hand immediately switching my focus elsewhere.

"Heh, just think of them as EXP Ikarus and how many levels you could get from killing them all"

"Aesa agrees with Petra, that thought is pretty appealing all things considered"

'Am I secretly a sociopath considering their suggestions seem to be working?'

Hurriedly moving along until we get to the church, a new different feeling presides over me when I realize I've massively fucked up here. I had literally one responsibly and I've screwed that up as well! Turning up to the wedding was difficult enough but there had to be something else as well.

"Oh shit! You're going to hate me Petra"

"Heh, never Ikarus. Why do you say that though?"

"I, erm... kinda forgot to do some vows..."