Volume 4, 53 [Mounting Questions]

Volume 4, Chapter 53 [Mounting Questions]

After leaving the Tomb and returning to the Sanctuary, their discussion continued in Lewes’ house.

In terms of content, there was almost no difference from the previous loops: Emilia announced that she had failed her Trial and that she intended to keep trying.

Beyond that, Emilia didn’t give any more details, and, noticing this, Ram dismissed the meeting on account of Emilia’s health.

Going through the night’s events in their minds, they each left for their respective lodgings, until the only ones left in the room were Emilia, Subaru, and Ram.

[Ram: Ram will now help Emilia-sama retire for the night, but it seems a Barusu hasn’t realized that he’s overstayed his welcome]

[Subaru: Thanks for the non-roundabout way of telling me. Considering Emilia’s condition, I guess I should leave you to it...... but, I just want to have a minute. Can I be alone with Emilia for a bit?]

[Ram: Disgraceful]

[Subaru: You’re the one who immediately thought of it like that!]

He vehemently objected to Ram’s look of disdain, but the pink-haired maid only pretended not to hear anything. Then, she looked to Emilia, who was sitting on the bed,

[Ram: What do you think, Emilia-sama? If you do not wish to hear Barusu’s rubbish, Ram will dispose of him straight away]

[Subaru: What do you know? How can the gentle, kind-hearted Emilia-tan possibly reject me, right?]

[Emilia: I’m reeeaally tired tonight, if Subaru wants to chat about all sorts of voluminous topics like usual, then we’d better not......]

[Subaru: Haven’t heard anyone say “voluminous” in a while. ......Besides, I’m not in the mood for that either. I’ll leave seducing Emilia-tan for another time. I just wanted to talk about the Tomb for a bit]

Despite this usual exchange between them, Emilia still looked uneasy. But, hearing Subaru bring up the topic of the Trials, Emilia closed her eyes for a moment before turning her violet pupils to Ram with [Sorry], signaling her to leave the room.

Silently obeying her instruction, Ram bowed and headed for the door. And as she passed by Subaru’s side, she quietly whispered――

[Ram: Please refrain from any topics that might overburden Emilia-sama]

――Issuing this severe command lest he should forget.

With the sound of the bedroom door closing, only Subaru and Emilia were left in the room.

On the bed, Emilia looked up at Subaru with an earnest gaze in her eyes, and Subaru lightly shrugged,

[Subaru: I barely had a chance to check while inside the Tomb, but are you really feeling alright? Considering the way I found you, I’m still really worried]

[Emilia: It’s, alright. Mn, thanks. But really, I don’t feel anything strange with my body or mind. Besides, if there’s anything to worry about, I should be more worried about Subaru, you know?]

[Subaru: W-why’s that?]

[Emilia: There’s no “w-why” anything. Subaru.. even though I’m glad you came to find me in the Tomb when I didn’t come back, something also happened to you in there, right? Ram said it had been almost thirty minutes after you went in when you came out with me again]

In front of Emilia’s reproachful gaze, Subaru poked out his tongue in his mind.

Despite trying to throw her off the scent inside the Tomb, it seemed that Emilia still noticed something was off from Ram’s superfluous remarks. ――Imagining what might have happened over the unaccounted timespan from when he entered the Tomb to when they came out again, Emilia’s face stiffened.

Naturally, the events of the Trial resurfaced in her mind.

For the first Trial, she had to face her own past, and in the initial loop, just the thought that Subaru might know what happened within that Trial distressed Emilia to no end.

Even though she had remained calm in this loop so far, it wouldn’t be hard to imagine that she’d lose her current composure when she reaches that same conclusion. So,

[Emilia: Subaru, could it be...... Subaru took the Trial as well......?]

[Subaru: Nono, nothing like that. I mean, it’s not like they’d let anyone take the Trials. Besides, I was only in there for so long because I was trying to wake Emilia up]

[Emilia: Because of me?]

[Subaru: Yeah. It looked like you were having a nightmare so I was frantically trying to wake you up, but you were sound asleep, like you were trapped inside the dream. I thought about carrying you out just like that, but I got a feeling that something crazy bad might happen if I did]

He said, with exaggerated movements to cover his deception.

Emilia didn’t say anything to refute him. Naturally, she had no way to verify whether he was telling the truth. Since Subaru said so, even if she had doubts in her mind, there was no way to prove them.

[Emilia: I...... see. Sorry, for having that weird thought]

[Subaru: No, don’t be. Although, if only I could take the Trials too, maybe I’d be able to be at Emilia’s side and we could beat the Trials together]

[Emilia: ......I don’t know. Subaru and I might not see the same things......]

Emilia’s words grew weak towards the end, but she didn’t probe any further into Subaru’s lies.

She didn’t want anyone to know the truth of the past she failed to overcome, and her mental state probably made her want to believe Subaru when he claimed to know nothing about its contents.

Even now, Subaru was playing Emilia’s heart in the palm of his hand.

[Emilia: So then, what was it that you wanted to talk about? That wasn’t the main subject just now, right?]

[Subaru: Yeah. That wasn’t the main subject. There’s something else I wanted to ask]

[Emilia: Something you wanted to ask?]

Emilia tilted her head.

Watching the cascade of silver hair falling from her shoulders, Subaru went on, [Yeah, something I wanted to ask],

[Subaru: Lately, I haven’t seen Puck around...... is he still not responding?]

[Emilia: Uh, mn...... yeah. Puck still hasn’t responded. I keep calling him, but it’s like he’s asleep inside the crystal]

Suddenly hearing that name brought up, Emilia cast down her eyes and answered.

Her white fingers reached to her chest, and grasped onto the green, beautifully glistening crystal. But the crystal that housed the Great Spirit Puck seemed to have all but lost its radiance.

[Subaru: ......Any idea why?]

[Emilia: Even though there were times like this before when my calls couldn’t reach him, he’d always be back after two or three days. But this time it’s been almost a week...... I’m starting to get worried too]

It was the same little grey cat who once proclaimed that it will protect Emilia.

As that tiny figure emerged in Subaru’s mind, his thoughts turned to the calamities that befell the Sanctuary, and to Emilia, caught up within it.

When the so-called Great Rabbit attacked the Sanctuary, most likely everyone present became its food――that was what Subaru imagined, at least.

Garfiel, Ram, Roswaal and the others would have all been among the victims. And naturally, Emilia would have been one of them.

The sensation of being shredded, devoured, having their own existence become slivers of meat in another organism’s belly――the thought of what Emilia and the others must have experienced filled Subaru’s lungs with boiling rage and grief.

But, setting this fury aside, Subaru’s thoughts landed on the useless spirit who sat idly by while harm was allowed to come to Emilia.

It was the same in the last loop when Emilia’s body was possessed by the Witch.

The flood of shadows was covering over all the world, and Emilia was wrapped in that eerie shroud. Her body was taken over by the Witch’s will while the tall-talking Great Spirit did nothing.

All talk and no action, hollow words in the extreme.

[Subaru: All this time, the only big contributions from that guy were the fight with Elsa and those Sapporo Snow Festivals I got caught up in...... Can’t help but think that he’s totally unreliable at this point]

While holding his chin, showering complaints about Puck, Subaru forced his mind to think.

Calamities were about to befall the Sanctuary, which meant that Emilia would be in danger. Since Garfiel and Roswaal could not repel them, Subaru would have to find something to even the odds, and Puck was precisely what he needed.

[Subaru: You don’t happen to know any other way to reach Puck, do you? If he’s here, all sorts of topics could suddenly move forward]

[Emilia: ――――I don’t... know of any... I think]

Subaru didn’t expect much from this question, and Emilia gave the expected reply. It was just that there was something about the brief moment of hesitation before her answer that tugged at Subaru. But, before he could ask about it,

[Emilia: Was there something you wanted to ask Puck?]

[Subaru: Hm? Ah, yeah, since it’s a Witch’s Tomb, and it’s been there for over 400 years, I figured we should ask a guy who was around back then. Maybe we could make a few breakthroughs that way]

Hearing Subaru’s prepared excuse, Emilia nodded in agreement. Then, as if earnestly considering his proposal,

[Emilia: That’s... right. Puck might, just know something...... mn, I got it. I’ll try even harder than usual to call him]

[Subaru: O-K. I’ll look forward to Emilia-tan’s success, then]

Emilia was determined to beat the Trials. She was unaware that Subaru had taken the Trial as well. And, so far, her motivation hadn’t waned.

Puck was still holed up in his crystal, unwilling to come out, so probably couldn’t be expected to make an appearance in this loop. Considering how he wouldn’t offer any help to make things easier for Subaru, and how they left things at the end of their last conversation, Subaru’s opinion of Puck was only continuously worsening.

[Subaru: Well, I shouldn’t stay too long. Ram will get some weird suspicions and that’ll give her even more reasons to bully me, so I better get going. Although, if Emilia-tan wants someone to sleep with, I wouldn’t mind......]

[Emilia: I don’t want someone to sleep with though?]

[Subaru: Oooog. So straightforward......got nothing to say to that...]

Recalling his encounter with the white-haired Witch――Echidona, Subaru curled his lips at Ram’s implicit rejection of their meeting.

Although his discussion with Echidona had lead to the tragedy of the previous loop, Subaru nonetheless believed that he had received more than what he had paid. Just having someone he could confess Return by Death to was already plenty enough compensation.

[Subaru: ――――]

For a moment, Subaru and Ram’s eyes met.

Just what could be residing within the depths of those faintly wavering eyes? Subaru strained his awareness to see it, but, before the image could take shape, it dispersed as she looked away.

[Ram: You should leave now. It wouldn’t do to make Emilia-sama wait much longer]

[Subaru: ......Sorry to have kept you. I know... that what you’ve said wasn’t wrong]

At last, he apologized for his brashness, and Ram, accepting his apology, turned away and headed for the bedroom.

Watching her maid’s dress disappear behind the closing door, Subaru exhaled a long, deep sigh, and left Lewes’ house.

The breeze sweeping through the Sanctuary brushed against Subaru’s hair as he came out of the building. Breathing in the scent of grass carried in the night’s wind, Subaru stepped out into the night-befallen Sanctuary and headed for his bed in the Cathedral.

Walking across the grass, and following along the trail by the light of the moon, Subaru began to think on how he should make use of his time in this loop.

Having been assured that there is no limit to Return by Death, Subaru was now able to do something he had never done before―― that is, to sacrifice an entire loop solely for the purpose of gathering information.

Since he was already determined to throw in his life, there would be no other, more efficient way to take advantage of Return by Death.

[Subaru: If I just try something different each loop, the solutions to all the obstacles are bound to start appearing one by one......]

And then, all he would need to do would be to link them together and fulfill them all in a single loop.

To break through the obstacles that stand in his way, and beautifully hold onto everyone’s futures: that, would be his perfect victory.

Although, just who would be included in that perfect victory was something to consider in and of itself.

[Subaru: ――――]

Suddenly, Subaru stopped――

――when he smelled something in the wind other than the grass beneath his feet.

Subaru looked up. And in front of his field of vision, was a youth standing in the middle of the star-lit path.

With his arms crossed and his spiky golden hair fluttering in the wind, Garfiel gave his fangs a click.

[Subaru: You sure are a timely bastard]

[Garfiel: What’s that, y’don’t seem surprised t’see me. Well, that’s kinda odd, but does help move th’conversation along]

Just after he was talking about him with Ram, Garfiel showed up here. Subaru couldn’t help but scratch his cheeks and remark on the timing.

Then, Garfiel gestured with his head, as if signalling something to Subaru.

The small figure took a few steps, went off the path, and headed towards the forest.

Watching the figure go further and further away, venturing into the thick undergrowth of the forest, Subaru did a light stretch and turned to the Cathedral――

[Garfiel: Wasn’t I tellin ya t’follow me with that nudge just now!? Oy!!]

Garfiel came running over shouting abuse at Subaru, who was trying to walk away, and Subaru held up his arms and shrugged,

[Subaru: Just a little joke. I didn’t miss the point, don’t worry]

[Garfiel: Kinda pissin’ me off here. Y’keep up or I eat ya]

[Subaru: Normally, wouldn’t saying something like “I won’t eat ya” have a more calming effect here?]

Roughly swinging out his strides again, Garfiel didn’t respond to Subaru’s comment. Subaru had a bad feeling about how Garfiel sounded like he wanted to say something but didn’t, but all there was to do now was to follow in small quick steps behind him.

Leaving the main road and entering the forest, after walking a short distance, Garfiel snorted.

They’ve arrived in a small clearing amidst the rows of trees, about the size of a round table enough to seat 4 or 5 people. There, Garfiel turned around,

[Garfiel: So...... th’hell did y’bastard see in th’Tomb?]

[Subaru: ......you too?]

After Emilia and Ram, he was the third person to ask him that.

Unlike with the previous two, Subaru would have to be cautious what answer he gives to Garfiel, since he probably wouldn’t give up asking until he’s gotten to the bottom of it.

Not minding the thoughts going through Subaru’s head, Garfiel spat out [Me too, huh?], and clicked his fangs, as his golden irises narrowed into slits,

[Garfiel: I don’t know who said what t’ya where, but I ain’t gettin’ ignored so easily. “Suspicious Berube extends th’same t’his family”, as they say]

[Subaru: Sorry, I took a bit of time trying to wake Emilia in the Tomb. Whatever you think I saw in there is just your imagination, you know]

[Garfiel: Y’got some nerve givin’ me that. Yer whole body’s reekin’ of the Witch’s stench, y’think y’can fool me with that? Ah?]

[Subaru: ――――]

Wrinkling his nose as he said this, Garfiel’s words were full of hostility.

Hearing this, Subaru couldn’t say a thing. Yet, at the same time, he also sensed that something was out of place.

The reason for Garfiel’s hostility――was the Witch’s lingering scent.

That had been Subaru’s conclusion in all the loops so far, and what Garfiel just said also verified this. The problem was, the timing of when he brought this up in this loop was strange.

Subaru had been terribly nervous as he came out of the Tomb, expecting some sort of attack from Garfiel.

Subaru had just Returned by Death, after dying right in front of the Witch, no less. So the Witch’s lingering scent must have been far thicker back then than now.

But, unexpectedly, Garfiel did not take any actions to attack him. Instead, he even seemed to be expressing genuine relief for Subaru and Emilia’s return.

All throughout their meeting in Lewes’ house, and as he watched Garfiel leave the room, this very point had been bothering him.

Up until their parting, everything had been normal, and yet when they met again after only 10 or so minutes, Garfiel’s attitude had drastically changed, and Subaru couldn’t imagine why.

Could it be that the stench was so pungent that his nose lost all sense of smell, and it only managed to recover after some time had passed?

Subaru lifted his arm to smell himself, but could only smell the fatigue that had accumulated over the course of the day. Resolving to wash himself as soon as he gets the chance, he turned to Garfiel.

[Subaru: About that Witch’s lingering scent... I’ve had quite a few people point that out to me before]

[Garfiel: ......Heh, that so? Those guys must have been pretty accommodatin’ t’not do anythin’ about it, oy. Such a revolting smell too, why would they, I wonder]

[Subaru: They probably decided to overlook how I smelled and judge me based on my actions instead. It’d be a great help if you could do that too. At least, you let me go when I just came out of the Tomb, right?]

[Garfiel: ――――]

[Subaru: My loyalty to Emilia is beyond question, and I don’t intend to do anything to harm the Sanctuary. I hope you can believe that much. So, if you could just quietly let me off that’d be a huge help]

From a conveniently optimistic standpoint, the fact that Garfiel didn’t attack the moment Subaru opened his mouth at least showed that he was still rational. So it should be possible to reach a compromise through words.

In fact, Subaru could almost see a slight waver in Garfiel’s eyes. After all, Garfiel wasn’t the kind of person who would thoughtlessly eliminate Subaru just because he could sense the Witch’s scent on him. It was only when that stench was combined with some other condition that he began to take action.

Whatever it may be, in this loop, it didn’t seem to have triggered yet. So it was up to Subaru to find out just what that trigger is in the meantime.

[Garfiel: ......Y’haven’t answered my first question]

[Subaru: Mm?]

[Garfiel: What did y’bastard see. In the Tomb. Whether I let y’go or not will depend on th’answer y’give me]

Glaring at Subaru, Garfiel asked again, though the force in his voice had somewhat diminished from before.

There were only two kinds of answers Subaru could give him――the truth, or the same lies he told to Emilia. Which one was the right solution? There was a need to make sure of that,

[Subaru: In that case, let me ask you a question as well]

[Garfiel: Don’t get yer situation wrong here. I ask, y’answer. Y’want me t’eat ya?]

[Subaru: Don’t be mad. Allow your shoulders to relax, and just take it easy and answer]

Garfiel bared his fangs, while Subaru slightly wiggled his shoulders and drew in a deep breath.

Keeping the question lodged in his throat, he locked his eyes onto Garfiel, and,

――Here’s the moment of truth.

He encouraged himself with that thought,

[Subaru: ――I saw a bunch of kids who looked exactly like Lewes-san, you know anything about that?]

-=Chapter 53 End=-