Volume 4, CHAPTER 113: JEWELS NEVER COME FROM THE SOLITARY QUENE
His eyes won't open fully. Blood flows through him so poorly he veins might as well be clogged. But the scarlet dripping from his nose and his wounds shows no signs of dampening—was he or was he not wanting for blood? Bleeding some of it out might actually be perfect for his broiling brain.
With all the punches he's taken, Subaru's recognition of the world comes with just a smidgen of lag while he shakes his head and thinks these thoughts.
It really felt he had been standing up solely for the purpose of getting punched again.
He did not mean to stand there doing nothing, but even supposing he punched or kicked back, his attacks would not hit. With every blow he sustained he spat blood, suppressed his pain, made himself smile a cryptic smile which screamed 'your attacks are entirely ineffective!' and stood back up. And repeated this.
They were not ineffective.
Both the insides and outsides of his body groan, the entirety of his guts practically burst and mushed together. The bones supporting his body feel erroneously to have crumbled to dust, and the fact that all his limbs still move according to his will can only be described with the word 'miracle'.
However, not a single one of these things resulted from a miracle.
Every time his consciousness seemed about to fall, about to falter, his fading awareness would be grabbed by the neck and dragged back to him in stern reprimand.
From inside his pocket crackles a hot, sharp pain—an excessively spartan compass, practically cooking his brain.
While it's something he had requested himself, his cheeks still twist at how relentless it is. He was using tricks to keep himself from losing consciousness. Regardless, numerous other strategies existed for Garfiel to stop Subaru.
That Subaru nevertheless, as he recklessly continued to stand up, never sustained damage which would perfectly incapacitate him, was entirely due to Garfiel's own judgement.
If he took a real hit from a Garfiel in top form, then Subaru would be done in a flash. Just one hit would transform him into sloppy chunks of gore.
The exorbitant damage Garfiel sustained from Otto and Ram's fight did contribute to why this has not happened. But Garfiel, who strained his wounded body to get here, still possessed the fangs to kill Subaru in one bite and the claws to shred him apart with one swing.
That this has not happened is due to, unable to fatally injury another no matter what his own condition is, Garfiel's judgement.
Ultimately, Garfiel is far too kind—is likely the situation here.
The Leweses, Frederica, even Ram, all of them had appraised Garfiel that way.
His usual crude disposition and boorish behaviour made unimaginable the sensitivity of his heart. Although he spoke of violence, internally, he constantly nurtured and focused his strength in a manner that would protect.
Someone he found unforgivable, someone liable to destroy SANCTUARY.
Even with such a person as his opponent, he could not make the decision to take their life.
Subaru: “—”
Subaru knew he was taking advantage of Garfiel's disposition and kindness.
Utilizing Garfiel's personality had been a principle of Subaru's for fighting him all along. With Garfiel as his opponent, too kind to give it his all, then Subaru was somewhat convicted that he would not be killed.
But even said, he has a grievously wounded Garfiel facing him, and he's getting decked.
If Garfiel had been in peak condition, Subaru surely would not be getting away with so little. For that he felt grateful to Otto and Ram, who had endeavoured for him while ignoring his plans.
—Could they be dead?
Being that Garfiel's personality keeps him from killing Subaru, it's inconceivable that he would have killed Otto and Ram. Even if it had wound up happening, Garfiel's attitude would give it away. And most importantly, if Garfiel had killed Ram, then no reason existed for him to show up and stop Subaru in human form. To rationalize, and remain in bestial shape would be natural.
Garfiel had not denied Subaru's statements about his neglect to kill them.
Meaning that the conclusion to Otto, Ram, and Garfiel's fight amounted entirely to that.
Garfiel: “—σσσσσσσ”
Garfiel cradles himself as his body starts transforming.
His arms, his legs, enlarge not one but two times over, his torso's thickness and size shifting into something overpowering. His claws and fangs become sharp as blades while his face morphs from that of a human to that of a feline.
Golden fur coats his bare skin. Four feet contacting the ground lug his great body.
—What materialized here, with Subaru reflected in its slit-pupil eyes, was a golden tiger.
He needed to kill Subaru to stop him.
After countless swings of his fists, Garfiel finally reached that conclusion.
And so to kill the Subaru that he needed to kill, Garfiel made his decision.
He would call to the blood sleeping within him, to his bestial instincts, become a tiger and take Subaru's life.
All while in the shape of a dimwitted animal, to end this without witnessing anything.
Subaru: “But that's where you're messing up, Garfiel.”
His inability to kill his opponent, and inability to strike them down with his fists, was kindness. Making the decision to protect SANCTUARY, to protect himself and those around him, was also kindness.
But running away to where he would not witness his actions, all for the sake killing of someone he could not kill, had nothing to do with kindness. What it was was Garfiel's weakness.
And Natsuki Subaru would not hesitate to take advantage of it.
Subaru: “Begging you, body of mine. Don't break down from this!”
Hostility fills the transformed Garfiel's eyes, their reflection being Subaru. His limbs bend. Omens that the beast will come charging to rip Subaru apart.
This is the sole juncture he has for decision. Subaru grits his teeth once before focusing on his body's centre—on the gateway tied to the point just below his navel, and shouts.
Subaru: “—SHAMAAAAAAAAAC!!”
Garfiel: “—”
The instant the tiger opens its mouth, the world answers to the fervid call.
Ink-black fog erupts in the space between Subaru and the beast, drowning away the form of the towering creature. Moments before its consumption there swings an outstretched paw, but it strikes nothing before vanishing beneath the smoke.
Once the spreading abyss of dark swallows the beast, the unfurling confusion hoists the creature's existence into end.
Subaru: “ue, aauh...”
The instant he finishes watching the events through, an impact like a blow to his head assaults Subaru's skull.
The sharp pain of a drill boring into his cranium from both within and without makes his vision strobe in crimson, lights dancing all around. Unlike the dull pain of Garfiel's punches, this was an unsparing sharp hurt, as if shaving away at his soul—hurt he manages to swallow down, ingest.
The taxation of his gate, which he had been warned not to use.
The Capital's greatest healer had cautioned that he may never be able to use magic again. Betraying that advice, Subaru utilized the thing once more.
He feels his imperceptible gate burn. The foundations of this gateway within his centre sways tremendously, and somewhere far and distant and separate from his body, something severs.
This pain of something violently, messily, being wrest away.
Alongside the lossful sense of what will never be recovered, it brings Subaru's heart understanding.
Subaru: “Thank you.”
A strand he had continuously relied upon is cut.
He doesn't mind. An option that he supposedly lacked in the first place had merely been eliminated in earnest.
Regardless, it was owing to that power that he managed to get this far, and for that he was grateful.
For this was farewell.
Subaru: “—”
He looks forward.
His last cast of magic had failed to fully enshroud Garfiel's tremendous form. While crucially his head is veiled in the centre of the smoke, his overhanging body has its right flank peeking out.
He put in his absolute best, and still managed only this.
He sighs out his nose. A clot of blood stuck there dislodges, spills. He rigorously wipes it away with his sleeve as he leads his unsteady legs to step forward.
He reaches for his pocket. Palms the hard thing, feeling intense relief that it has not broken over the course of this battle. Should this thing be gone, he didn't have a fuck of a chance.
Subaru: “—”
The inky fog is steadily beginning to thin.
How many seconds since he cast? Ten? Five? Might even be shorter. He seriously had not a single speck of magical talent in him. But right now he was grateful for it.
The tiger's right flank was visible. Captured in a world of obfuscation, body immobile. While the magic had been imperfect, it conversely robbed Subaru of any need to deliberate.
And so there is no deliberation in his course.
Right foot, left foot. Far too slow to be called running. But so goes this laggard, momentum-helmed sprint.
There, once he draws close enough to touch this immense frame—
Subaru: “Get back down into my court, Garfiel.”
—Into that thick shoulder, Subaru takes the shining blue crystal from his pocket and pushes—stabs.
Light, spilling over.
※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※
< After your contract with Emilia's broken, you're back to being a free spirit... yeah? >
< Well, I suppose that's what it would be. But, even calling me free, my individual power is pretty immense. Your run-of-the-mill person wouldn't be able to provide the mana to maintain me. And besides, no matter who else it could be, I don't have any urge to contract anyone but Lia. >
< So that mana to maintain you.. it has to seriously be a lot? >
< Yup. For example’s sake, Subaru, we'll pretend that you tried to conduct me, and even borrowed power from the ambient mana... Mhm, I suppose you'd dry up in say, a day. >
< Uh...? Sounds tighter than I thought. But is that enough that you could you fight? >
< That day we're talking about is where I'm not materialized and you're just carrying me around. If I materialized would be, mm, I guess it'd take five seconds before you're out. Want to try it? >
< How about no. But man, seriously what happened to that thing about me having affinity with spirits? >
< So long as we're talking about these spirits over here, might be preface you needed for that. But even if that wasn't what it meant... my situation comes with special circumstances. I seriously am a spirit specially for Lia. >
< — >
< The plan to employ me after my contract's broken and freak out Lia is hitting some setbacks. >
< I wasn't asking you about this as a plan to shock or freak her out. But... are you kidding me? Guess my ideas were off then. >
< Sorry. And even pretending that it would probably work, there's the problem of the anchor...
actually, since we're here, we might've been able to manage something about that. >
< Anchor... something like the crystal hanging around Emilia's neck? >
< That one really is special. But fortunately there should be something made of the same material around here, and we could at least figure something out if we borrow just a tidge of it. But either way, even if I'm stuck inside the crystal, and left just stuck inside the crystal, the mana just isn't... >
< —So, something I wanna ask. >
< Hm? Yes? >
< Leaving aside whether it's a contract, is it possible to just have you inside a crystal if you're agreeing with it? Um, so long as the mana supply's there. >
< That'd be right. But, securing that mana supply would be incredibly difficult. Because I'm literally draining the mana, in my case. Sucking and sucking, until you're incapacitated... >
< — >
< ...Subaru? >
< Say, Puck. >
< Mhm? >
< So those replacements you mentioned for the crystal, where are they? >
※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※
—Stabbing into the tiger's right shoulder, expelling a terrific light, is a blue crystal.
Neither polished nor sanded, the cut-away jewel's sharp point drives into the animal's skin, where it grabs the creature's vitality and siphons it away.
Subaru: “—ghh!”
Dazzled by the light, Subaru topples backwards as if assaulted by forceful winds. He falls on his behind, retreating as he watches the scene before him, where the tiger swallowed in smog still has yet to notice the alternation to its own body.
That crystal sizeable enough to grasp in the hand would voraciously drain the mana of creatures it stabbed. Just keeping it stored in his pocket had exhausted Subaru incredibly.
What would happen when that effect was applied directly to the body? The answer lay right in front of him.
Garfiel: “—auh, aaaghh!?”
The smoke clears.
Subaru: “You're the one who drew away first, Garfiel! Then you fucking winge winge winge about it being your sister's fault! You don't think it's fucking pathetic!?”
The pit of his chest burns. What on earth was he saying? He was starting to lose track himself. Deep in his gut, in that very core, something dark squirms.
The supernatural gateway beneath his navel, connecting Subaru to the outside world, has lost its function.
So then, right now, this thing in the pit of this body, asserting its presence, was what, exactly?
Still unsure of his head, of his body, of this man before him, he screams.
Subaru: “Any time! Any moment! When you want to act! When you want to change! The instant you think that marks the starting line!!”
Suffer failure, lose everything, wallow in resignation and stop, hug your knees and cower.
Even should the disappointment in yourself, the disappointment of others, the isolating feeling of being abandoned by your precious ones all feel to steep you from your depths upwards, and you're stuck thinking that you're worthless.
Subaru: “Raise your head again, walk the path in front of you. And how can anyone order you to give up on that!”
Give up! Relinquish! Surrender!
Idiocy. All of it, insipid bullshit warranting no heed.
If there is someone hugging their knees, and you feel the caprice to call out, you best as well support them.
Do your best! You can do it! I don't know what's up, but if you stand and keep running, you'll reach somewhere.
—His chest, burns.
Subaru: “Aren't I right, Garfiel!”
He calls the name of the man before him, his eyes wavering feebly, his visage small.
—His guts, blazing.
Subaru: “Aren't I right, Emilia!”
He calls of the name of the girl behind him, her gaze looking down at him, her standing on the threshold between weakness and something else.
—His eyes, with it spilling over.
Subaru: “Say—aren't I right, REM!!”
His head raised, mouth open, eyes wide, he calls the name of the person who gave him the impetus to stand.
He had been taught that giving up and coming to a stop should surely not mean the end.
Natsuki Subaru desired that the power he was given that day reach every single person there was.
Subaru: “—”
A power which does not belong to Subaru squirms within the core of him, shrieking its birthing cry. Cheering the fact of its birthing, and welcoming the fact of its birth.
With Natsuki Subaru as an intermediately, it again connects to the world.
Heat, spilling over.
In the centre of Subaru's body, a conflagration burns.
It eddies in the space before Subaru, scarlet flowing out his bloodshot eyes, and takes form, tampering with the world.
Garfiel: “I!”
Garfiel soars.
He raises his claws to swing, bares his teeth to show, no longer using words, but actions to deny Subaru's assertions.
Unable to spin words, unable to put his feelings to form, this is the only method he can conceive. He doesn't know anything else. And so Garfiel reaches his claws for Subaru.
Heat spilling from bleeding Subaru is congregating right in front of him, but he doesn't notice. Right in front of the Subaru he is leaping at, there spawns a warp in space, an inconceivable fissure in the world, but he doesn't notice.
—He does not notice the overwhelming force extending from that fissure.
Well naturally. He cannot see it. Or no, nobody except Subaru could see it. Because this thing, which only Subaru can negotiate, is UNSEEN HAND.
Subaru: “—”
The world looks to move in slow motion.
This sensation is a far too familiar one for Subaru. While on the brink of dying, or in the instant before sustaining a fatal wound, or when suffering punishment for voicing the taboo, it's always during pain and depresses him.
But unlike those times, this illusory sensation is presently, here for Subaru's sake.
He sees oncoming Garfiel very clearly.
Full hostility—but, it also carried the wisps of a child's tantrum.
Subaru focuses his gaze on the tip of Garfiel's chin.
Somehow, he knows. Before makes it happen, he gains comprehension.
All he has to do is fix his aim, and let this thing he's tugging taut loose.
That alone, and surely, it would be accomplished.
—And so Subaru does exactly that.
Garfiel: “—!?”
The unleashed power shouts in glee, sniping defenceless Garfiel from below.
The outstretched torrent of force takes the shape of a fist, extends to the shape of an arm, which slams a punch into Garfiel's face midway though his leap, shooting him high skyward.
Garfiel: “—wh, wha!?”
Struck by a completely unanticipated attack, Garfiel fails to catch himself as he slams back to the ground.
He tumbles to a stop, splayed out on the earth. Subaru understands that he has just fired the decisive blow.
Simultaneously, an incredible load of something is wrested away from inside him.
Subaru: “Euhg, auh... au,”
He falls to his knees, his body folding as he vomits all he wishes. But not a single drop of blood or bile comes out. Not a drop of scarlet or saliva, for nothing extraneous remains within him.
That was what a final strike it was, on the tail of so much effort.
The torrent of power unravelled and dispersed immediately after sniping Garfiel.
Its fountain likely remains inside Subaru even now, but he doesn't sense that he can withdraw it. The present Subaru, at least, lacks anything more he can give.
If he uses that arm any more than he just has, he will need to sacrifice more.
But, being that the fight is over, for the moment that necessity is—
Subaru: “Come on... you're joking.”
Garfiel: “—Don't, und'resti, mate...”
Broken down, bordering on unconsciousness.
His vision edged with white, so exhausted any blink could be his last.
He had expended such incredible efforts, and still.
Garfiel Tinzel, with an outrageous nosebleed streaming down his face, is standing.
Subaru: “Seriously, just how tough are you...”
Garfiel: “'F I ain't, ain't foldin', it... ain't, ain't end, endin'...”
Garfiel's consciousness is halfway gone.
His unfocused gaze appears to look at Subaru while not looking at him at all. Tenacity alone was allowing Garfiel to stand, rejecting that final push.
Almost surely, Subaru could shove him and that would topple Garfiel.
But the strength to enact that attack was equally lacking in Subaru. Nevermind taking a hit, Subaru was ten seconds away from losing consciousness too.
They had both done their absolute best, having used up every power in their possession to reach this conclusion.
It had always been true for Garfiel, but unmistakably for Subaru too, all of their strategies are done.
If Otto and Ram had not worn Garfiel down, Subaru probably would not have been able to get this far.
The idea that he could do something so long as he had the blue crystal as his hidden ace had been naive. Help in maintaining consciousness, and debilitating Garfiel to the utmost. Even with both of these things, Subaru surely would not have managed it.
The blue crystal on Garfiel's shoulder flickers.
It both seemed encouragement and reprimand for a Subaru on the verge of sinking into failure, and unwittingly he finds himself close to giving a wry smile.
Subaru, the crystal, Otto, Ram.
All of this power combined, and they still could not beat Garfiel. He is, without a doubt, strong. Subaru would sincerely acknowledge that. And so,
Garfiel: “And now, yer...”
Subaru: “Don't... think bad of this, Garfiel. I did say we're breaking that blockade.”
Garfiel: “There ain't nobody...”
With unsteady steps, Garfiel closes in on Subaru.
His arm hangs aloft, and at its tip and dirtied with blood, there exist dull claws. Should they reach him, Subaru reaches his end.
Garfiel puts the whole of his focus into this attack.
And so he does not notice. The tremors, the noise, of what is approaching.
—The final push, to secure Garfiel's defeat.
Garfiel: “O, ver!?”
???: “—?!”
Drowning out his shout comes the dignified roar of an earth dragon.
The charging black dragon rams head-first into undefended Garfiel, striking him in the side and sending him flying.
Garfiel: “—Gaugh!?”
Stricken with an impact which literally carts him away, wide-eyed Garfiel shoots off as easily as a kicked pebble.
He bounces once, twice, three times off the earth, kicking up dust plumes and caking himself in dirt before coming to lie face-down on the ground.
He does not twitch an inch.
Seeing this, the contributor of the merciless final attack arches her head, roaring.
Subaru: “What do you think, Garfiel...”
Aside Patrasche as she bellows of the victory, Subaru calls out to the fallen Garfiel. In a voice so frail, it's questionable whether he heard it.
The key which decided this battle. What was it?
Well it was simple.
In a fight against strong Garfiel, weak Subaru did not fight alone.
Meaning,
Subaru: “This—is the power of numbers.”
Garfiel: “Had t'be, other... goddamn, ways t', say that...”
Motionless Garfiel responds sourly to Subaru's words.
Subaru's cheeks relax slightly in hearing it.
Subaru: “Okay then, it's the assemblage of everyone's feelings, a victory for bonds.”
Garfiel: “Haah... 's like a damn, JEWELS NEVER COME FROM THE SOLITARY QUENE...”
With that, Garfiel falls silent.
Seeing that fact through, Subaru comprehends their definite victory, before looking up at the sky.
Subaru: “Finally heard a saying that worked...”
With that satisfied statement, he abandons all consciousness and allows himself to fall.