Chapter 398 All the Ways it Could Go Wrong ~ SASHA ~
The following hours were a blur. She wanted to be with the females, preparing them, reassuring them—helping them recover from their shock. But there was too much to do. And every time she or Zev thought of something new, they had to reevaluate and start again.
She'd already gotten word to Skhal to tell the Creatures it was happening, and happening fast. It was time to move.
She'd already gotten a message to Kyelle to start preparing the females for the idea that they might have to leave the hall in the next couple days.
She'd already hugged Yhet when he walked through the Courtyard, just because it made her feel better.
But then Zev pulled her away from a conversation with the Alphas about what they should and shouldn't advise their people to pack, and dragged her up to their bed-chamber. When he turned to face her, he was pale.
"The bond," he said quickly.
"What?"
"The bond. You're still thinking you'll get the females yourself, right?"
"I'm not just thinking it, Zev, I have to. They're expecting me."
He shook his head. "We forgot about the bond."
"What do you mean—?"
"Sasha, I felt like I had a heart attack last time we got separated by the Gateway, do you remember?"
She'd stopped breathing just at the memory. "I… yes."
Zev's face was stormy. "You can't go crossing back and forth. We have to stay together—that's got to be what it means, right? The Gateway cuts us apart, and Sasha, I don't know what's going to happen next time. We can't just hope for the best. We have to bring other people into this. You have to send some of the others through and see if they can find the females. You and I have to go together."
"What?! But we can't, Zev! Nick said—"
"DON'T SPEAK HIS FUCKING NAME TO ME!" Zev roared.
Sasha startled and stared at him.
Zev covered his face with both hands. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm just…"
"Zev, what is going on?"
He let go of a shuddering breath, shaking his head and pulling himself together. Sasha stepped up to put her arms around his waist and stroke his back.
"Zev, breathe, please. What's going on?"
"You know what's going on," he said darkly, but he put his hands on her shoulders and started to knead them.
"I mean… You're panicking. You don't usually panic. Ever since we met with the Creatures—"
"Ever since we learned Nick is even deeper in this shit—in our lives—than we realized? Yeah. Yeah, I'm tense and I'm fucking angry and I want to kill him, Sash. Like… I'm fighting it. But my wolf… I want to eat him alive."
His eyes, always so piercing, locked on hers, and for the first time, she saw his wolf staring out of his human face—those eyes, predatory and intent.
Sasha swallowed and reminded herself it wasn't her he was angry with.
"Zev, you need to calm down."
"I know, I just—"
"We're going to talk about the whole Nick thing later because that's real and that's… something needs to happen there. But for now just because time is short… you're right about the bond. But I don't see how I can do anything else. I don't think the females will go with anyone else—especially not a male and there are no other females we can send."
"What about Kyelle?"
"She's got to take these females through for me because they need to be moving while we are—remember? We have to do this all at the same time. Besides, I told Vayl that I was coming—that's the word she's spread in case the Gateway opens when she's not around. They're all going to be looking for me."
Zev shook his head and his jaw was tight. "We can't do it, Sash. We have to bring the others in—I mean, we need to anyway. If something happens to one of us, we're both gone and they're all screwed. What if we go for the others and one of us has a heart attack and dies? Do they all just get left there? No, we can't risk it, Sasha, please. You have to promise me—"
"But how are we going to get to the new world without going through the Gateway?"
"We're going through it together," he said slowly, warily. "But that's why… that's why we can't risk everyone else on us."
"What are you talking about? You said—everyone said—we can't cross together."
"We can if one of us is out of it."
"What?"
"That's how I got you here. It's… fuck. So, it's how they bring through the Chimera when they're young, or if they're freaking out. We can enter together if one of us is unconscious. Remember when we arrived? I gave you too much of that stuff and you didn't wake up. It scared the shit out of me."
"Zev, I'm Alpha! I can't just get knocked out—what if I don't wake up and there's a need on the other side?"
"Sasha, please." His hands shook as he cupped her face. "If one of us dies, both of us die. We can't risk leaving everyone else without a leader. We need…. We need to establish the hierarchy, put it in place in case something happens to us, make sure they know who's in charge if we don't show up, and… and I need you to trust me to get you through—because you can't carry me."
Sasha's head spun. It was all too much, too many things. But no matter what angle she looked at it from, she realized he was right. Even if they went through separately, even if they survived that initial breaking… there was no guarantee they were both going to make it through this. She could step out of the gateway into the lab and get shot. She could end up stuck in the sanctuary by accident. Zev could get hurt—
She turned from that thought. "Okay… okay… so we need to bring in others to do this too. But that means… shit, Zev, that means we need to send them through and make sure they can even do it! What if the females won't listen to them, or they can't find the safe place? We have to send them through now—tonight—to test it before Nick and the humans are paying attention tomorrow!"
Zev nodded. "I know," he said, finally calm.
Sasha blew out a breath. "Well… I guess we better call our friends together," she said quietly. "And pray that the females will listen."