Chapter 80

Chapter 80

My belly full of food and my core full of chi, I slip into the healer's tent, dropping off some plants collected by the patrols and scan the area for Tokta, finding him hard at work with a patient. Wandering over, I begin helping out around the tent as best I can as I wait, collecting dirty bandages and tools for cleaning, bringing water to the injured and helping them drink, chatting with a few familiar faces as I check their wounds for signs of infection or blood poisoning. After half an hour of keeping myself busy, Tokta motions for me to follow him and move towards a large, messy desk.

Okay so you're here to learn how to regrow your arm. Without any greetings, he skips over to the important part, his nasal voice sounding more bored and tired than normal. I can't blame him, there are far more wounded than injured, but I can't really help out too much with only one arm, feeling like I'm in the way more than half the time. First, you need to decide if you want to learn from me. I have neither time nor energy to hold your hand through the process, and failure will result in no small amount of pain. You can always wait for Taduk to heal your arm and teach you properly.

Well, might as well try, right? No sense just idling around for an indeterminate amount of time.

Shaking his head, he looks at me critically. What do you know about regrowing limbs?

Er... It hurts a lot when it's done.

That earns me a small chuckle. It hurts far worse while growing.

Fuck.

Ignoring my crestfallen expression, he continues to pile on the downsides. It is mentally and physically exhausting and you will need more rest and food than normal, almost twice as much. If you reach a point where I believe you can succeed, it will take a minimum of three weeks for you to regrow your arm, during which the healed area will feel as if rubbed raw and burning. Even should you abandon the process, the pain will linger for at least a week, possibly more.

A devilish smile is pasted on his face, as if taking glee in my growing apprehension. When you make an error, at best it will need surgery to fix and at worst, we will amputate what you have grown. It is not a simple process Rain, and while I am impressed with your natural healing abilities and medicinal knowledge, I doubt you will be able to master this skill with the little help I can afford you, likely only bringing yourself pain. However, if you still insist on learning, despite all my warnings, I will do what I can to help you succeed. His grin grows wider, his pale skin and white teeth almost glowing in the lamplight. Or chop off your failure.

Impatiently tapping his foot, he waits in silence as I contemplate my choices. It's not as if I have anything better to do, so I might as well try. This is still part of my plan to be an undying, fast healing warrior. Better to start learning now rather than later. No pain, no gain. I would much appreciate any guidance you can offer me.

Looking only slightly disappointed, he nods at me and turns towards his disorganized desk, moving things about as he searches for something. Explain for me the process of natural healing with your chi.

Uh, You take in the Energy of the Heavens, and bind it as chi in your core, then you circulate it throughout your body, and it heals you. It's pretty simple stuff honestly, so I don't really understand why people say I'm talented. I just throw chi at the problem until it is fixed.

And what type of injuries are healed in that process?

Err.... Bruises, cuts, abrasions, things like that. You can regrow teeth, skin, and nails, but not fingers, limbs, ears, eyes or organs. Uhhh... Esse-

Stop stammering when you speak, it is annoying.

I don't know, it's not what I expected from healing. It's so direct and complicated, different from how chi manipulation has been so far. Normally, I can either do it, or I try again until I can, no knowledge necessary.

Well, that's because so far, you haven't really been manipulating chi, just guiding it along. Always so helpful, adorable Sumila turns to me with a smile on her face. Self-healing of this magnitude is one of the most difficult internal usages of chi. Did you expect to learn it in a day?

Not really. Taduk always said I'd be healing other people soon, but then he let slip that soon was five to ten years. Real soon. I guess time runs differently when you expect to live for several hundreds of years. I wonder how old Taduk really is? I guess I'm just bored by all the technical reading. It raises more questions than it answers. Sumila gives me a patient look, indicating I can ask away, and I take full advantage, smiling at her in thanks. For starters, if I direct the creation of my missing arm, can I modify it, make it better, faster, stronger?" We have the technology. Can I make it scaled and armored, or claws bursting out from between my knuckles?

No. I can almost hear the implied 'you idiot' in her tone. You cannot forge a stronger body through chi, or add enhancements.

... Why not?

Because that is the way of the world. There are limits, and creating artificial flesh is one of them. When you regrow your arm with chi, it will be just as it was before you lost it, no stronger, no weaker, just like when you heal your injuries. She moves a piece into checkmate and lets Li Song peruse the board, studying where she went wrong.

That isn't always true though. I've injured myself for years, and when I meditate, it repairs my injuries and makes me stronger than before. Striking boards and getting hit with sticks is not pleasant, and has earned me more than a few nasty rumors regarding my preferences and mindset. Small villages are always full of gossips with nothing better to do. Stress fractures in my bones are healed over and reinforced, my overworked muscles made stronger and tougher. I'm shorter and skinnier than most, but I'm almost 100 kg in weight, proof that my body is more dense than others.

Shaking her head at me as she resets the board with Li Song, she gives me a helpless look. Except that you aren't healing yourself with chi, you are strengthening yourself with the Energy of the Heavens, something everyone does when they meditate. All you do that is different is you injure yourself to the point of idiocy beforehand, allowing your physical body to absorb a tiny bit more Energy than otherwise possible. Mama says it is like swatting flies with a heavy spear, small results attained with great effort.

She turns back to her game, giving some new advice to Li Song, always helping others. The woman I married in my dreams was a lot like that as well, a charitable soul and a very generous lover. Shaking clear my idle thoughts, I return to trying to figure out a shortcut in repairing my arm. So, if healing with chi is just returning my body to a previous state, when is the state saved? If I cut off my toe would I be able to reattach it without great difficulty if I were fast enough? What if I took someone else's arm, can I attach that to myself?

I wouldn't do that second thing, it's just speculation, but if it is possible, then that opens up new avenues of thought. Like the right to bear arms, or maybe just one bear arm. Ha, too bad that pun only works in English. I should do some testing on my first idea, maybe cut off my pinky toe and see if I can reattach it quickly. No, I put weight on my toes when I walk, the pinky finger would be more ideal to cut. Just the tip, enough to figure out if I can reattach it. I open my mouth to ask Sumila to help me cut it off, but I change my mind before I speak, deciding to sleep on it before I go around mutilating myself, or at the very least, ask someone about it. That's not going to be fun, I can just imagine Tokta's reaction at my questions, but it beats cutting myself for no reason.

Saying goodnight, I take care of my business before crawling into my bedroll, the night still young. Adujan is still meditating, so I need to fall asleep before she comes into the tent or else I get too worked up to sleep. Laying in the darkness, my mind continues to go over what I know and things I should try. I doubt I can graft animal parts onto my body, there is no way that I'm the first person to come up with that idea. I'll keep studying the book, and talk to Tokta in the evening. I can't slack on practicing everything else, but a bit of reading will be a good change of pace. I may just end up having to wait for Taduk.

My mind begins to drift in my sea of consciousness, that blessed moment between awake and asleep where inspiration always seems to strike, but you are already too sleepy to care. Visions of myself float before my eyes, charging into battle with bear arms, tearing through the Defiled with my massive paws, smashing Demons aside with bear fists, unstoppable in all my furry glory.

You come up with the most interesting idea's, brother. Is this truly possible? My alter ego appears next to me, full of false confidence, his minor hesitations betraying his inner thoughts, his arms hanging at his sides, broken and battered. Looking at him, and then at my bear arms, I sigh deeply and sit down, palming my face with my clawed, soft, furry hands.

I might actually be insane.

Great.

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