Chapter 546

Chapter 546

...then the Legate handed me this invitation and told me to go mend my tarnished reputation. Shrugging to share my helpless ignorance, I add, After which I got changed, came straight home, sat down in this chair, told you guys everything that happened, and now were all caught up.

I couldve done without the tongue-in-cheek conclusion, but this entire day has been one interrogation after another and Im sick and tired of being the focus of attention. Its not anyones fault, because Mom, Dad, Akanai, and everyone else were just trying to help and want to know how my meeting with the Legate went, but Im completely done with today and just want it all to be over. My social batteries have been drained dry and I need to recharge with a good old fashioned floofy cuddle puddle, but apparently today is the day of infinite social interaction.

My own personal hell. Mother take the wheel, because I cant do this on my own.

If given the option, I would never choose to be this way. It feels shitty to resent people who care about my well-being just because Id rather wallow in solitude, but I cant help it. I am who I am, so now, not only am I frustrated and unsociable, Im also ashamed and remorseful for being a grumpy grumps, but at least now I get to enjoy everyones outbursts of noble outrage and furious vows of retribution on my behalf.

Good, Dad says, beaming as he hands the invitation over to Akanai for her to peruse. Good, good.

...Was he not listening? I was stabbed and choked out as a test. It was so traumatic, I only remember two out of three near death experiences. Then the Legate made me pour his tea. The bastard!

Mhm, Akanai grunts, nodding in agreement while swelling with pride. About time. Although the boy is difficult to work with, he is all but impossible to compel. Now that the Legate has accepted this, he finally offers us a workable compromise.

...What?

Seeing my confusion etched in my dumbfounded expression, Mom takes the time to explain why theyre not outraged by the Legates actions. There there, sweet child, she says, stroking my cheek softly. Your father and grandmother do not mean to downplay your ordeal, but while the Legates actions were heavy-handed, you would sooner see pigs fly than hear an Imperial Noble offer a heartfelt apology. Shooting a pointed look at her shamefaced husband and mother-in-law, Mom snatches the invitation out of Akanais hand and holds it out for me to peruse. However, to most Martial Warriors, this would be more than enough to make up for your suffering this afternoon, hence their insensitive and dog-brained remarks.

This? Glancing over the invitation once more, it still reads exactly the same as before. How is an invitation to a banquet almost two-hundred kilometres away supposed to make up for anything? I dont even want to go.

But you must, no matter the consequences. Moms steely tone leaves no room for argument, but she takes my hand to console me. For this banquet is to honour your accomplishments and those of your closest allies. To not go is to dishonour their efforts and sacrifices.

Its a banquet for the heroes of Sinuji, I reply, reading directly off the invitation. Taking place on the first day of spring. The only honour it mentions is being seated at the table of honour, next to that worthless idiot, Mitsue Watanabe.

Colonel General Nian Zu will be there as well, Mom replies, giving me a long-suffering look as if wondering how I can be so dumb. So will Brigadier Chen Hongji and others who you fought alongside in Sinuji. There, they will speak of your exploits and contributions while you smile and play the humble young Talent, thereby fulfilling your obligations to the Legate and mending your tarnished reputation, while also showing everyone you are once again in good health.

Tch. I still dont want to go. Sitting at the table of honour means I have to smile and wave at the crowd instead of hiding on the periphery and slipping away early. Rubbing elbows with the nobility is not my idea of a good time, and I had enough to last me a lifetime at Luo-Luos wedding banquet, which, I might add, ended in disaster when someone tried to poison me to death. Then again, Im still not sure how I feel about that particular attempt on my life. On the one hand, I almost died. On the other, the banquet ended early and I got to keep all the gifts, so... I dunno. It wasnt all bad. Lets just call it a wash.

Guess Im taking a trip to the Central Citadel then. Sighing, I look over the invitation once more and see that it only mentions Luo-Luo by name, who I guess is my plus one at the table of honour, and up to ten guests who will be seated elsewhere. Theres also a limit on the number of guards I can bring inside, namely twenty, and what appears to be a hastily added postscript which says that while arrangements will be made for the Guardian Turtle, any other animals will be turned away at the gates in the interest of public safety and hygiene, so I should plan accordingly. I imagine whoever wrote the invitation expects me to find someone to look after my pets during the banquet, but Im wondering if theres any way to smuggle a hare, two bears, three wildcats, sixteen rabbits, and twenty plus Laughing Birds into the party. Id include the cattle too, but they dont like crowds much, even if therell be food and music. Space is limited, so who wants to come with?

Maybe I could argue that theyre my guard animals, though Id still need to limit myself to only twenty, and I cant do that. I love all my floofs more or less equally, though Bugs attitude problem is really wearing on my nerves. I usually dont mind letting him sleep on my bed, but I dont want him or any of my floofs around when Im having happy fun times with Yan. I dont want them to watch, so they have to sleep outside, but stupid Bugs keeps thumping away at the pet door and trying to get back in while alerting everyone in the manor to the fact that I have a guest over in the middle of the night.

Not cool Bugs. Not cool.

In the end, its decided that Mom, Alsantset, Charok, Tali, and Tate will be joining me at the banquet, with Taduk, Lin-Lin, Mila, Yan, and Song rounding out the rest of my quota. As for guards, even though Id rather bring the Bannermen to honour their contributions, Luo-Luo insists I use the Death Corps because even though I cant trust them to keep their mouths shut, they are a status symbol I cannot do without at a public event of this magnitude. Shes right, but theres no way in hell I wont bring Dastan and his people to this banquet, because if were celebrating the heroes of Sinuji, then they deserve to stand front and centre.

With only ten guests and twenty guards, a lot of people are getting cut from the list, like Ghurda and the other Bannermen, Rustram and my officers, Monk Happy, and a whole lot more, but at least theyll be making the trip with me. Dad couldnt come even if he wanted to though, because he has to stay behind and command the Northern Citadel in Nian Zus absence. Akanai is also staying behind, mostly to keep Dad safe. She didnt say as much in so many words, but its clear shes worried hell be in danger without Nian Zu around to keep the peace. Its adorable how she behaves like a helicopter mom while treating Dad like a rebellious teen, ignoring his sullen stares and pretending as if she has other reasons to hover around his workplace. Despite his moody expression, Dad loves the attention, as evidenced by his wagging tail drumming out a rhythmic beat against his poor wooden chair. Even though he was adopted late in life, hes a mommas boy through and through.

Then again, Im not in any position to point fingers...

What comes next is the planning and preparation, because everyone knows this trip wont be as cut and dry as it appears. If it were up to me, Id fill my entire guest list with more guards and even trade Luo-Luo for Kuang Biao in a dress, because if history has taught me anything, its that dinner banquets are veritable minefields of political intrigue and assassination attempts, even more dangerous than dining in restaurants. A banquet is no place to bring loved ones and children, but my concerns are overlooked in favour of free food and the chance to see me honoured in front of the Empires elites.

Hooray. Honestly, Id rather suffer through a chili-oil colonic delivered by a pressure washer, but thats just me.

Given how my input is unneeded and my surly demeanour unwanted, it isnt long before Mom suggests I go get ready for bed, which I am more than happy to comply with. Hand in hand with Lin-Lin and Yan, I walk them both back to Taduks manor next door while Mila, Song, Luo-Luo, and a whole menagerie of pets follow along behind us. Once everyones through the double doors, I glance at Yan who nods ever so slightly, indicating shes already sent all the servants away and the coast is clear. Grinning from ear to ear, I scoop up Mama Bun and cuddle her close with a sigh, basking in the wonderful, healing properties of soft, shaggy, floof.

Finally. Sweet relief.

Giggling as the other animals gather around and clamour for affection, I collapse into a pile of bunny-kisses, bear cuddles, and kitten headbutts, which is about as close to Heaven as one can get here on this mortal plane. After having thoroughly indulged my need for floofs, I lie back in the grass with Baloos shoulder as a pillow and sweet Mama Bun still tucked in my arms. Sitting in a small circle around me, the five lovely ladies in my life smile and play with the animals as well, each one as enamoured by the floofs as I am. Across from me in my direct line of sight, the dazzling Luo-Luo hums a cheery tune while massaging Jimjams haunches, the usually diffident wildcat having taken a shine to the musically-inclined courtesan. They make a fine pair together, one feigning indifference while the other puts on airs, for it would be uncatlike to be affectionate and unwomanly to cuddle with animals. While I dont exactly love her, shes a sweet and endearing woman who I easily could see myself falling in love with once she learns how to be comfortable in her own skin.

Beside them sits Song, with Sarankho curled up in her arms, the prettiest of my wildcats snuggling with arguably the prettiest woman in the manor. I say arguably because all the women here are gorgeous beyond compare, but if Im being honest, when talking about appearance and nothing else, Song suits my personal tastes best. Long legs? Check. Soulful eyes? Check. Demure demeanour? Check. The list goes on and she hits every point, but theres more to love than just looks, and she hits those points too. She loves animals, hates losing, enjoys peace and solitude, and is a kind and loving soul.

Do I seek strength for the sake of strength? Not really. Whats the point of the strength? To fight? I enjoy a good spar or two, but I hate actually fighting. No, thats not true either. I love it. I deny it every chance I get, but the truth is, Im in love with the excitement and adrenaline, the death and bloodshed. I get bored sitting around at home with no one to fight or kill. Im addicted to the experience, because I never feel more alive than when I take a life or narrowly avoid my own death. Just this afternoon, I thought I was going to die twice, yet the whole time I couldnt stop joking and smiling, because even though it was a one-sided beating, it just felt good to fight again. No more weakly standing on the sidelines, no more watching while others die in my place, no, I was there in the thick of things, pitting my strength and intelligence against a worthy foe once again, and I loved every doomed second of it.

But... I wouldnt say I seek strength for the sake of fighting. I enjoy it, but Im not obsessed with it. I dont go around starting fights for no reason, nor would I ever kill for the sake of killing. Dont forget, before the Disciplinary Corps stuck their nose in my business, I was happy living life as a cripple. No stress, no struggle, just a simple goal to strive for each and every day, to set a new record of steps taken, and I. Was. Happy.

No, my love of combat is not the reason I seek Strength. So what other reasons are there?

To survive? If survival is all Im after, then strength is not necessary. With my knowledge and skills, I could live comfortably with a dozen different professions.

To live free and unfettered? Ha, hows that working out for me? Terribly is how.

To fight the Defiled? Even if I were at my peak strength, could I kill half-a-million Defiled by myself? Of course not, but my idea for a firebomb did just that. Id be of more use as a researcher, working with Diyako and OuYang Yuhuan to develop more powerful weapons of war, like repeating crossbows and runic cannons.

So why do I seek strength?

I have no idea why I seek strength, I declare. For shits and giggles maybe? Seeing Milas disapproving frown, I continue, What? Its sort of a valid reason. Being a Martial Warrior is awesome, and way too fun to pass on. I want to run on treetops and stand on a charging quin, call forth a tsunami and punch a shark so hard it explodes.

Also, I would really, really like to Conceal myself in a bathhouse. I mean, the People dont mind being seen, I just want to look without being teased about it. Is that really so terrible?

In the wake of my irreverent answer, Mila continues to frown while Yan shakes her head and Lin-Lin devolves into a fit of giggles. Luo-Luo politely looks away, but oddly enough, Song nods in agreement. I do not know why I seek strength either, she replies, pursing her lips in a fetching pout. Though it is definitely not for shits and giggles.

The way she repeats the phrase in a stilted tone sets Lin-Lin to howling with laughter, and the rest of us soon join in. Song is stoic as ever and unsure why were all laughing, but happy to be a part of it regardless. Shes a sweet girl, and I wish her all the happiness in the world, because Mother knows she deserves it.

On that cheerful note, we all head off to bed for the night, though Yan gives me a sultry look which tells me shell be over as soon as she can, then glares at Buster who she mistakes for Bugs to remind me to leave the bunnies in Lin-Lins courtyard. My horned honey is insatiable, but there are worse tribulations to suffer through, so Im understandably upbeat while walking Mila, Song, and Luo-Luo back to my manor where the former two can go home with Akanai and the latter can run off to her own bed. Seeing Milas scowl grow even deeper, I smile and pinch her cheeks with both hands on impulse.

A terrible, poorly thought-out impulse, bordering on suicidal.

Dont touch me, Mila snaps, her frown turning into a pout. Idiot.

Whats wrong, beloved?

Instead of answering, my fiery betrothed fixes me with a pointed glare. You forgot, didnt you?

...Dont answer that. Its a trap. Say something. Anything. Uh-buh? Brilliant.

When is your celebration banquet supposed to take place?

Err, first day of spring.

And does that date not mean anything? Does nothing important come to mind?

Um... no? Her teary gaze rends my heart to pieces, but I soon realize what shes hinting at. Are you worried we wont make it back in time for our wedding? Resisting the urge to laugh, I take her hand and bring her fingers to my lips. Beloved, spring lasts for three months, or thereabouts. Theres a whole forty five days between the first day of spring and the spring equinox, plenty of time to visit the Central Citadel, have a few drinks, and head back to plan a wedding. Seeing Milas dumbfounded expression and Luo-Luos subtle warning to shut my mouth, I stop and ask, What? What am I missing here?

The spring equinox is the first day of spring, Song helpfully supplies, And not the midpoint, as you seem to believe it to be.

...

......

I hate this fucking language.

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