Chapter 575

Chapter 575

The Azure Empire could really do with more court jesters.

Stage magicians and stand-up comedians could work too, and there are probably other professions Im overlooking, but the point is, the Empire suffers from an appalling lack of entertainment options, especially in the family friendly category. Besides playing music or reciting poetry, theres not much else one can do to hold an audiences attention without ample preparation, and the aforementioned activities might not even do that. Its probably why we always end up fighting at these stupid social events, and even though I get to sit this one out, its still nerve-wracking to do nothing while Song risks her life in the sparring ring.

Id introduce improvisational comedy games to the Azure Empire, but I fear for all the audiences that would turn Defiled from boredom...

Luckily, my Martial Aunt is a formidable Martial Warrior who can kick ass and take names with the best of them, and she deserves more than a smidgen of perfunctory applause. Condensing her Aura was probably the least impressive part of her accomplishments tonight, considering she just defeated eight of Centrals reputable young warriors without breaking a sweat. Were she not an Oath-Bound half-cat slave, shed probably get a standing ovation for this phenomenal performance, but instead she gets a polite golf clap to acknowledge her entry into the Empires Roll of Experts at twenty-two years young, liberally sprinkled with muttered comments about good breeding and healthy stock which could have been politely Sent instead. Backhanded compliments everywhere, but Song takes it like a champ and saunters back to her table with head held high and without a hair out of place.

It sucks that I had to lead the charge just to get this minuscule amount of recognition for Song, not to mention how the crowd is only playing along because her opponent cheated and they have to give me and Akanai face. Even Nian Zu, Yuzhen, and my other allies seem less than enthused about clapping for Song, although Grandpa Du looks mighty pleased with himself. Its a shame the Empire is so fixated on status and face. So what if Song is bound by her slave Oath? That doesnt make her accomplishments any less impressive, but a slaves achievements are hardly worth celebrating, which is just wrong seeing how the Empire needs all the morale-raising stories it can get. I guarantee you no one will be talking about Songs stunning victories come tomorrow morning, but the city will be abuzz with gossip about Ken-Kitchis disgraceful defeat at the hands of a slave, while overlooking his attempt to Aura-cheat his way to victory. Id call him out on it, but Im only guessing at what happened and Wu Gam is sitting in the audience. Id rather not have to answer any uncomfortable questions he might bring up, seeing how I pretty much did the same thing to beat him and take my title as Number One Talent in the Empire.

Honestly, I shouldve just lost and let him take the title. Its brought me nothing but grief.

...Besides Luo-Luo, I guess. Shes alright. Okay, better than alright, and looking oh so fine in her tight, low-cut dress and long, flowing skirts, but still. My point stands. Being the first ever unaffiliated Imperial Consort sucks donkey dick.

The applause cuts short the moment Song returns to her seat, as if no one in the audience wants to risk being the last person clapping, but I continue for a little while longer until the twins stop too. Following this is a minor lull, during which Luo-Luo nudges me with her knee to spur me into action, but I have no idea what she wants me to do. To buy time, I take a bite of my peach-lotus bun and try to look real interested in what Im eating, while inwardly reviewing what I know about banquet protocol.

Lets see... Dont speak while eating, dont chew with mouth open, no elbows on table, no chopsticks stuck in bowl, dont slurp your noodles, dont use your hands... I dont think Im doing anything wrong. Im using chopsticks to eat my bun, even though itd be easier to use my hands instead, and Im not taking giant bites or chewing loudly either, so whats got Luo-Luos panties in a twist? Does she wear panties? No, focus Rain. Get your head out of the gutter. I wish she could do more than just repeatedly nudge me with a knee, and I dont mean in a sexual way either. Sad thing is, I cant be seen taking instructions from her or else Id lose face. Not only is she a servant and concubine, but shes also a woman, which means I, as a macho warrior man, outrank her in every way possible and must therefore be the dominant person in the relationship. Its silly that Martial Warriors would still have a male-centric viewpoint, since Chi is the great equalizer between gender disparity, but thats how things be, so Luo-Luo has to play the part of dutiful and obedient concubine rather than the able political advisor she truly is.

Seriously though, what am I doing wrong? I should eat slower so I have time to think. Thats it, small bites. Chew thoroughly. Why is everyone watching me eat? Do I have lotus paste on my cheek or something? Was there a specific order I was supposed to eat my desserts in? Dont look at Luo-Luo or Mom, everyone will notice and theyll think youre an idiot. Dont worry, you can figure this out on your own, you got this. Wipe your lips, but be casual about it. Handkerchief is clean, so thats a bust. Did a button come undone? Nope, collar is still uncomfortably tight, but at least I can breathe, which Im not sure Luo-Luo can do in her skin-tight dress. My spear is still leaning against my chair, so that didnt fall over, and theres nothing out of place on...

Oh right! Were publicly feuding, and since the opposition sent up the first challenger, Im supposed to send out the next one. Doesnt make sense if you ask me, since Song just fought eight matches and left undefeated, but thats the game. Shit, now it looks like Im eating slowly on purpose just to be an asshole about it. Whatever. Might as well lean into it. Damn this peach-lotus bun is good. Theres no peach in the dessert, but the white bun has a pinkish cast to it which makes it look like a peach, but really its just a steamed bun with lotus paste and some creamy, yolky filling. Its kinda weird to look at, being a pinkish white bun leaking thick, golden fluid, but damn if it isnt delicious. I need to learn how to make this. Ill send someone to ask the chef later. Its weird how chef isnt a prestigious position, but probably because theyre all slaves too. No point investing money into training someone if theyre free to seek employment elsewhere.

This world sucks on so many levels...

Taking a long sip of tea to punctuate my stalling, I take a deep breath and do my best not to hem or stutter. What a rousing series of matches. Why am I speaking weird? Be normal. Are there any other young heroes whod like to... Not take the stage, because Im sitting on it, but er... Maybe I should just trail off and gesture at the impromptu sparring arena. Yea thats fine. Its fine. Everythings fine. Man, if Im gonna be this awkward, maybe I need a drink or three to loosen up.

Coughing to hide his smirk, Fung steps out from the crowd with spear in hand and makes his way front and centre, just as we planned. This one is Tong Da Fung, Disciple of Akanai, Young Magistrate of Shen Huo, Third Grade Warrant Officer, and twenty-three year old Expert of the Empire.

Though we all agreed he would fight second, Fungs opponent comes as a surprise, not because he didnt make the list of young Central Warriors to watch out for, but because hes technically supposed to be on my side. Striding out amidst the hushed whispers and shocked gasps of the crowd, Wu Gam bows to the Legate and offers Fung a salute, looking sharper than ever in the fashionable grey and black robes I gifted him, which contrast so well with his white-furred fox ears and tail. Warrant Officer Third Grade, Wu Gam. Twenty-four years old.

Dammit dude. This better not be a betrayal...

Fungs a much better politician that I am, which isnt saying much, but even I can tell hes surprised by Wu Gam answering his challenge. The half-foxes have no skin in this political game, which means either theyve chosen a side that isnt mine or Wu Gam is here to have fun. The answer soon becomes clear as Eccentric Gam shouts, Flirt on your own time, boys. We aint here to watch you two stare lovingly into each others eyes.

Oh good, so Wu Gam just wanted to fight. Guess he got all excited watching Song beat the shit out of so many people he knew...

Spurred on by his Mentor and sibling, Wu Gam makes the first move and Fung responds in kind as staff meets spear in a boisterous blur. Sinking back into my seat, I watch them both trade blows and cannot for the life of me tell whos winning. Wu Gam has the raw strength, but Fung has firm control of the tempo and seems to be matching his opponent thus far, so it could really go either way if theyre only fighting to first advantage. Not bad odds for Fung considering hes up against one of the Hwarang, who are supposed to be Centrals best and brightest, and Wu Gam himself is a cut above the rest. Unfortunately, judging by the disapproving stares emanating from the crowd, it seems like most people think this is a poorly veiled act for Fung to improve his status, and honestly, I dont blame them. I know Fung has the Martial chops to stand at the forefront of our generation, but like me, he has an image problem. Where I dont fit the image of a proper young hero, Fung perfectly fits the image of a spoiled dandy, the likes of which are quietly looked down upon by actual Martial Warriors, but tolerated because of their families. The problem is, now that its been revealed that the Ryo Family is standing firmly in my camp, there have been whispers about how Fungs match against Ryo Geom-Chi in Nan Ping might have been faked, which obviously isnt true, but the truth matters little when it comes to public perception.

Gulongs first match ends in a narrow victory over his Lin Clan opponent, who slinks back into the audience in low spirits with a bloodied cheek. Hardly the most thrilling of matches after what weve already seen, but I clap just as politely as everyone else did for Song, albeit with care since Im still holding one of Pong Pongs berries. The little guys been so stressed all night he hasnt had much of an appetite besides eating all my shrimp and shellfish, but I didnt really have a choice. It was either bring him along or risk leaving him behind if things went south, and while I wish I could do more to soothe Pong Pongs nerves, Im not exactly comfortable sitting in spitting distance of a Divinity either.

At least things are going better than expected. No ones tried to kill me yet, or insinuated a better person should be sitting up here in my place. All they did was leave my table off the stage and ignore me for most of the night, which isnt even high-school levels of mean. Hell, I actually prefer things this way. Idiots. As if I even want the attention...

Gulongs next opponent is one of BoShuis younger siblings, but Ill be damned if I can remember his name. Im sure he mentioned it before they started fighting, but I wasnt really paying attention again. Theres too much to focus on, so between my good manners, proper posture, Concealed threats, and possible Divinities, Ive no time for scrub shenanigans.

Or at least I dont until Gulong earns his second victory of the night, once again scoring a narrow victory after an extended exchange which ends with yet another cheek injury. Same cheek too, and using a similar move as well, I think, though Im not entirely sure. Maybe Gulong isnt as terrible a Warrior as I thought, which makes his shitty attitude and underhanded schemes that much worse. If hes actually talented, then why not use those talents to earn his place in the Clan instead of undercutting the competition? Whatever, from what I can tell, Zian hardly misses his Young Patriarch title, and it almost seems like hes happier for the loss, though I have been pretty busy lately and might not be seeing the whole picture.

It turns out I wasnt the only one who noticed Gulongs skills, as his next challenger is none other than Big Huu himself. Or perhaps hes upgraded to Huge Huu, because while BoShui hit a growth spurt in these last two years, Huushal has transformed himself into a demi-giant of titanic proportions who looks suitably imposing in his plain Sentinel leathers. Standing well over two meters tall, Huus rippling frame towers over his opponent as he makes his introduction. Huushal, Son of Ghurda, Chakta, and Elia, twenty-three year old Third Grade Warrant Officer, and Sentinel of the People.

Somehow not registering the massive disparity in size, reach, and sheer mass, Gulongs disdain is clear to see. At least hes confident, Ill give him that. Hmph. I remember you. You were there during the Society Contests, the oaf who rode Falling Rains coattails to success. Id hoped to teach one of his women a lesson, but I suppose beating his dog will do just as well.

Welp, guess Gulongs gonna die now.

The two combatants take their places, and after a moment of stillness, Gulong makes the first move, bringing his longsword down in a two-handed overhead slash. Huu sidesteps the attack with ease, but doesnt bring his giant sabre to bear, instead keeping it tucked against the back of his arm in a reversed grip as if he doesnt intend to use it. Snarling in anger, Gulong whips his sword about in a vicious barrage of attacks, but they cut clean through empty air as Huu dances around the edge of his range. Round and round the two Warriors go, Sentinel and Noble dancing across the sparring grounds as Huu dips, ducks, dives, and dodges about while Gulong mounts an all out offence. Rage and frustration growing as his sword repeatedly fails to connect, he soon loses his sense of caution as his swings grow wild and wide, a sure sign the Young Patriarch is losing control of his actions. Rage helps in a fight, but it also makes it easy to lose focus, and the latter is vital to survival.

Gulong is decently strong, but he lacks life and death experience, which is evident as his fury overwhelms his better judgment. So fixated on striking his opponent, Gulong fails to notice the broken tiles left by Fung and Wu Gams exchange and slips on a loose shard. Having foreseen this as a possibility, Huu bull-rushes his opponent with a meaty shoulder check and sends the Young Patriarch crashing to the ground. The air rushes out of Gulongs lungs as his sword clatters across the tiles, and even before Huu rests his sabre gently beside his opponents neck, its clear to everyone that this was a decidedly one-sided match. Balance, Huu enunciates, once hes sure Gulong is paying attention. It is a simple concept, yet so difficult to grasp, for the Mother left us no tools to discern where Balance truly lies. How does one find the midpoint between calm and anger? Love and hate? Joy and sorrow? No one can say for sure, because no two people are ever the same. There are Warriors who stride into battle as cold and calm as a frozen lake, while others fight with a raging heat burning from within their chest. Both retain Balance, but it is easy to see they are different states of Balance. Curious, is it not? Removing his saber from Gulongs neck, Huu hefts the blade onto his shoulder and turns to leave. I suggest you seek out an alternative state of Balance, before you draw too close to the fire and burn yourself.

If anyone can spot an at-risk Defilement, itd probably be Huu, but Gulong doesnt take the warning well. He doesnt say anything, but the hatred in his eyes is clear as day, for he sees this as utter humiliation rather than the sound advice based on personal experience that it actually is. Granted, many others would also see things the same way, but I suppose Huu felt it necessary to chide Gulong in public instead of offering him a friendly Sending. Then again, fuck Gulong and fuck his dad too, though judging from their similar stares of seething fury, it seems like Huu has just become the Situ Clans public enemy number one.

Its fine. We can handle them. I hope the Situ Patriarch does make a move, so Ghurda can put him in his place. Then Nian Zu can take over and we can finally bury the hatchet with the Society of Heaven and Earth. Wouldnt that be something...

Still not quite done, Huu spars with a few more opponents and wins without using his saber before calling Dienne out for a match. The Southern Number One Talent graciously accepts, striding out to the floor in his shimmering, multi-coloured carapace armor, for the first time tonight, Huu takes his stance and readies his weapon for the match. A stance which mirrors Diennes own, the same one he displayed to great effect during the Grand Conference. Weapon held low in both hands with the tip angled and pointed back, its a flexible posture which allows for a wide range of movements including several powerful slashes, and both men settle in for a silent duel of minds. Its not about who makes the first move, but rather who makes the first mistake as Huu and Dienne posture and feint while barely moving more than a centimetre at a time. The first blow will set the tone of the rest of the match, if not outright end it, so theyre each seeking out every advantage they can before that initial exchange.

Huu inches his back foot forward, and Dienne responds by dropping one shoulder. Both men reset, and Dienne shifts his weight forward while Huu alters his grip so his saber is at a forty-five degree angle instead of seventy five degrees. Reset. Narrowed posture is countered by straightened posture, lowered knees thwarted by loosened grip. Back and forth the two men shift, and while a layman might find it boring and fidgety, I can barely remember to breathe as I parse through the myriad of Movements the two Warriors allude to and discard with every micro-movement and reposition. Hanging Branch matched with Darting Fang, Standing Fury with Rending Fang, Pierce the Horizon with Lumbering Gait, Huu and Dienne rattle through their paired Movements at breakneck speeds and I follow along every step of the way. This is a dance of a different sort, one played out in the minds of Martial Warriors with eyes to see it, and I can scarcely bring myself to blink for fear of missing even a single exchange.

There is no warning before the blades meet, but I anticipated it nonetheless, jaw clenched and ears covered as the thunderous crash and shrill shriek of metal on metal echos through the banquet hall. Luo-Luo starts in her seat beside me while the twins cringe and cower into Alsantsets distracted embrace, and even Ping Ping lifts her head to see what all the fuss is about, but the match is already over. So fast I didnt even see a blur, all my eyes could catch was a hint of motions and both men had finished shifting positions, but I piece things together solely on how they were standing before either one made a move.

Arm extended in a full swing, Huu holds his sabre high in the air after an attempt to part Diennes head from his shoulders using Wolf Form, Twisting Snap, an arcing diagonal slash which, in this case, started low and ended high. The dusky Southerner saw this coming and countered with Raising the Winds to parry Huus powerful swing and force the saber safely overhead. In the same motion, Dienne turned his parry into an attack and brought his giant scimitar straight towards Huus abdomen and lower chest, where its wicked edge currently rests. Had Dienne followed through, Huu would be lying in a puddle of his own organs after having all but thrown himself onto his opponents blade, all thanks to the Southerners perfect control over not only his own strength, but Huus as well.

On the surface, it just looks like Huu swung and Dienne ducked, but this was a victory won through a difference of mere millimetres. Catch the attack at the wrong angle or move a hair too slow, and Huu could have easily smashed through the parry and won the day, but unlike Gulong, Dienne is both talented and experienced in the ways of war. After all of a heartbeat, both men return to their starting positions and put their weapons away, only to exchange a silent salute before retreating from the stage.

Dammit, first Fung and Wu Gam, now Huu and Dienne. Thats tried and true bromance right there, a bond forged in the heat of battle. Next I bet Zian and BoShui fight and become best friends too, assuming they already arent, all while I sit here on stage and twiddle my thumbs. This sucks. I wanna be healthy again, before I lose all my best bros...

Well... At least Ill always have Dastan, so thats... something, I guess.

Chapter Meme