Chapter 188 - 188 "The Past: My Elee"

188 “The Past: My Elee”

The 2nd timeline Cathain’s pov~

(Trial Ground)

“I hate you, Cain...I will never forgive you for killing me and my child!!!”

My red eyes widened with shock because of the words she spoke, and i felt a sudden change in my body like i was being purified.

I felt my mind becoming clear and my body feel lighter... i felt like i was finally awake.

The terrible headache which tormented me for days, which even the imperial doctors failed to cure was finally gone too.

This is the first time that she called my by nickname, as i never gave her permission for it.

And the mention of a child... I wanted to ask what she meant.

The disgust and hatred look in her jewel like blue eyes made my heart skip a beat with sudden fear.

.....

I felt terrible, my mind was telling me something but my heart wanted the otherwise.

But it was too late to stop the motion of my hands, which was holding her sword to execute her.

The shiny sword, which was decorated with blue and silver jewel beautifully; the sword which accompanied her to countless battles in warfield, to fight for our empire...

Finally fall on her neck, without any mercy.

Full of cruelty.

A horrific gasp could be heard from the audiences as her head got separated from her body and her blood splashed on me.

My grip on her sword started to tremble viciously as a huge part of myself regretted this decision.

I was full of her blood and suddenly i felt my eyes getting wet for no reason.

What have i just done?

What have i just done?!

It was me, who put her in prison... It was me, who just executed her.

But it felt like, my heart died at the same time.

I stood there... Infront of her incomplete body, staring at her silver hair which still shined even after being on the pool of blood.

Her blue eyes turned completely lifeless and everything came to an end.

Like they wanted...

“THE TRAITOR DIED!”

“SERVES HER RIGHT!!”

The audiences started to cheer up for her death, but i felt angry... She always thought of them first before her.

Took care of this empire like her own child, which is something i can never deny.

Maybe she was really a better suitable person then me to rule this empire.

I found my brain to be finally working properly, think about everything rationally.

But the more i thought, the more my heart started to fill with fears.

An unknown fear to face the tomorrow...

A day without her...

A life without her...

The people in charge to discard the deceased body with a small team, stood infront of me hesitantly.

As i was not moving for them to make space to clean up the ground.

Which is full of her blood.

But, the thought of not seeing her again made me terribly afraid.

Even if i didn’t knew why.

“...Take her body to the imperial medical camp, no one can bury her without my permission. Freeze it.”

I spoke with a cold voice, with no expression on my dark face.

The executioner and the knights looked at me with confusion.

No criminal has ever been burried properly, they have been discarded for wild animals to eat.

But i didn’t wanted that, the order i gave was crazy and i knew it.

As my identity as the emperor, no one dared to speak anything more and obey my orders silently.

I watched them taking her body with them to the imperial coroner, and my heart ached badly.

And i started to feel suffocated.

My gaze fall on her left hand, which was hanging outside of the stretcher.

A gold ring, with a shining red ruby on her ring finger.

The imperial engagement ring, which i have never seen her taking out from her fingers since we were officially engaged.

Then my gaze fall on my own ring finger, which was empty.

I never worn our engagement ring as I didn’t even attended the ceremony after fighting with my father, who loved her more then me.

After a bit conversation, Duke Raven took away Jennifer with him as everyone started to leave one by one after greeting me.

Some spoke how the empire will change from now on, some felt sorry for her... Some people cursed her.

But i couldn’t speak or think about anything, except her last words.

‘I hate you, Cain...’

Those words seem to be engraved in my heart.

The last words of her life was how much she hated me... i felt terrible.

I never heard any sweet words from her, but her actions was always sincere and... full of love.

As time went by, i found the entire trial ground empty.

It was only me who was still standing there, trying to recall any memory where i showed warmth to her.

Or, was gentle with her.

The cleaners didn’t dared to come and clean the ground as i was still there.

Everything seemed like normal to everyone.

The cleaners have to wipe her blood away and return home.

The officials are busy to discard her documents and remove her name as the empress from everywhere.

Preparations for Jennifer to became the empress might also start.

Then they will return home too.

But what about my home?

Do i even have a place to go now?

The sky turned dark as the night fall, but there was no moon in the sky today.

The night was dark and...scary, full of loneliness.

Even before i could sense what i was doing, i found myself sitting on the wooden box where she was standing this morning and my hands started to stroke her blooded footprint.

Was a execution really necessary?

Couldn’t i help her to live atleast?

But then i felt angry again, because till her last moment she was dignified, full of courage.

Not a coward like me...

I hoped for her to beg me, to ask for a chance to live; but she will never bow down.

She rather torment me like this then begging for her life, making me realise what i just lost...

I leaned on the wooden box, where she offered me her head with no fear and stared at the ceiling.

Is this what she saw before dying?

.....

I must have been like some demon to her...

Surprisingly, i suddenly felt no emotions towards the girl i declared to love or remorse for her child, for whom i executed the empress.

My mind, which never liked her started to feel with her memories;

Memories, which i didn’t even knew that they still existed in the deep down on my heart.

Somehow, i found my whole life filled with her.

Even if we rarely communicated, but she would understood my feelings without any explanation and comfort me in her own way.

But her blood on me has dried long ago, proving that she is no longer here, in this world to understand me anymore.

And will never be beside me anymore to comfort me.

There is no one in this world, whose touch can make me feel comfortable again...

Who will brew tea for me, when i get a terrible headache or support me in every step.

No one, with whom i might be compared with again or hear that she is more suitable to rule this empire.

I won’t hear that am incompetent anymore.

But somehow, i don’t like this emptiness in my heart; which is now aching so badly that i can’t bear it anymore.

And then, to my surprise; i felt wetness on my cheeks and found myself sobbing lowly as i gripped the wood stands of the square wooden box.

The stands, which she hold to get up slowly when she tripped after being pushed.

“Empress...”

Eleanora La Dalton, her name kept on repeating on her mind. Which name was forgotten for the past four years after she became the empress.

She was known as Empress Eleanora Cathain Valentino, my name attached with her; which i also snatched back brutally.

From the girl who dedicated her whole life for me.

I imagined a image of her sitting beside me, with her hands crossed over her knees.

He shiny silver hair swaying as her jewel like blue eyes gently looked at me, who was sitting with her bloods all over him.

Now that she is gone... I want to talk with her, hear her voice.

I want to hug her tightly, holding her hands as we walk in the garden.

Never letting them go again from my reach...

Embrace her when she is feeling low, laugh with her like she used to do with others.

Her genuine smile, which i never saw.

I want to know what kind of woman she was, what she liked, what she wanted...

Not what i liked or wanted and changing herself for me, am curious about what she really was.

Am curious about what made her smile, what made her feel upset.

I hated her till now, i never showed her any warmth or give her love and respect that she deserved.

I executed her with my own hands, but now, am finding myself sobbing for that same girl.

Where it hasn’t even passed 24 hours since i made her leave me, how am i going to live the rest of my life?

Without her...

I always felt like she was the empress for the emperor, not for me, for Cathain.

But now i think, it was me, who couldn’t become her Cathain, her Cain.

She was always my empress, my Eleanora;

My Elee...