"Lu Lu, Lu Lu you are such a party pooper. Wah!.... let me have some of this," she said reaching over for whatever was remaining of the stolen bounty. She stuffed an entire piece of the cranberry bliss fudge into her mouth making her cheeks bulge.
The gorgeous woman resembled a cute hamster making it unbearable for both the steward and Wen Qinxi to hold their laughter.
Old Lu covered his mouth to conceal a smile but Wen Qinxi openly snickered.
"Pfft...," snickered Wen Qinxi fending off the urge to poke those bulging cheeks.
"Mmmmm. Did, did you really make this? Wah! You should have seen how pissed of Xieling was. That deadly stare made him.... it made him lo-look like, look like a tiny psycho," she explained making a hand gesture for something small.
Wen Qinxi shook his head before saying, "Lin Lin loves his fudge. If he could he would have stabbed those women's fingers," with the last part said in a whisper as though afraid of being overheard by Qie Xieling.
"Come, I will cook for you so, so you don't steal Lin Lin's fudge in the, in, in the future," said the drunk Wen Qinxi staggering out of his seat.
"Uh, I want, I want braised pork. Woo hoo, let's go," said the drunk Madam Qie tossing her lady etiquette out of the window.
Old Lu didn't think drunk cooking would end well. Best case scenario, they cook poison. Worst case scenario, they fuckin burn down the entire kitchen. Either way, it was definitely going to end badly. He left a maid to watch them and ran off to seek Qie Ranzhe's help. His wife and mother were about to burn down the house.
To vent his anger Qie Ranzhe was busy punishing the husbands for the wives' crimes by screwing with their shares. When the steward walked in and informed him of what was happening downstairs it was then that he remembered his husband ditched him. He had been wondering what Su Xin was up to when the man was supposed to be in here coaxing him. Only to find out his man was getting drunk with his mother.
He turned to the surveillance footage in the kitchen only to find the two giggling while cutting things. From the live footage, one could clearly see how nervous the maid was. His lip twitched feeling a tinge in his chest. It seemed he now had a second person to fight with for Su Xin's attention. "Let them bond, just make sure they don't burn the house down," he said zooming in on Su Xin.
Old Lu couldn't believe it but what else could he do? The boss had spoken. He closed the door behind him shaking his head. While walking down the corridor, he bumped into Machu who was heading to Qie Ranzhe's study.
Seeing the old man's troubled face, he asked, "What's got you muddled?" with his hands in his pockets. Old Lu explained the situation seeking comfort but didn't expect Machu to dart downstairs.
"Where are you going?" asked the old steward with a perplexed look.
"Security office... to watch a good show," replied Machu without stopping. Drunk in-laws. That would be an interesting show to watch. Too bad he didn't have time to get popcorn.
It was most definitely a good show because the two protagonists of the movie Drunk in-laws didn't disappoint. There wasn't any need for corn flour in making braised pork but somehow they found it and ended up smearing it on Su Xin's face claiming it was a beauty treatment good for the skin.
From a DIY face mask to arguing over how Su Xin made braised pork they did it all. Even though Madam Qie didn't know how to cook and would most likely brew poison if she tries, she kept trying to add things in that wok.
Only the heavens know how Wen Qinxi managed to come up with a decent meal after all that. With a face plastered with flaking corn flour, Wen Qinxi sat on the floor alongside Madam Qie and the two opened up a bottle of red wine to accompany their half-assed braise pork. The steward had confiscated their bottle of baijiu leaving them with no other choice.
"Mmm, not bad, not bad," said Madam Qie eating like a little piggy.
Wen Qinxi chuckled lightly while taking a sip of his wine. "I am not bad either," he said with his head tilted to the side, "I will treat your son with the utmost respect... How about this? If I fuck up one more time I permit you to kill me?"
Madam Qie wiped away the sticky sauce on her mouth using the back of her hand with her gaze locked on Su Xin. She was waisted but she could tell he was being sincere. She didn't answer his question but broke into laughter instead with her body tilting to the other side. Madam Qie laughed herself to tears pointing at his face.
"What?" asked the drunk Wen Qinxi while clumsily wiping his face making the dried cornflour paste flake like dandruff.
"Hahahaha...," she laughed unrestrainedly while poking his face finding the flaking process amusing.
Wen Qinxi was tired of being laughed at for looking like a clown so he stood up to wash his face on the sink faucet. After washing it all off, Madam Qie dragged him out of the kitchen saying, "Let's go. I have some face cream that would make you pretty... oops Hahahaha," she giggled recalling her in law was a man, "*hiccup*, I mean handsome."
"Woohoo, let's go make me handsome!"
The two drunkards walked up the stairs with the steward following behind just in case they tumbled to the floor. Madam Qie led the way yammering on about how great her face cream was and so forth. She was so immersed in her advertisement of the world's greatest face cream that she didn't notice her in-law was snatched away.
As soon as Wen Qinxi passed the study door, it was suddenly flung open before he was pulled in.
Old Lu, "..."
"I promise you wil-, huh?" said Madam Qie turning around only to find out that Su Xin had vanished into thin air. She shrugged her shoulders and carried on walking while calling out, "Lin Lin!"
At the call of his name, Qie Xieling ran to switch off the light before jumping into bed without changing his clothes. Unfortunately for him, feigning sleep wasn't going to save him. He was dragged out of bed by his feet like in a horror film. The poor boy clutched the bed sheets tightly but he was no match for the drunk nana.
While Qie Xieling was having his cheeks pinched by the nana from hell, Machu snuck into the kitchen with one goal in mind. His footsteps paused cursing, "Shit!" noticing the state those two left the kitchen. It was as though a category five storm hit the kitchen only but left the rest of the house intact.
He silently walked over to the cooker and grabbed the wok before vanishing through the back door like a thief. The food god had been stingy lately pressuring him to use this kind of means.