Chapter 82: Pencilgton-sensei’s Lesson in PK Laundering, Part 2

Guild. I was involved with them a bunch of times in the past and every single time I had arrived at the conclusion that they weren’t for me. Certainly, my view of them can be rather twisted since up until now I was only involved with Ashura-kai and Black Wolves, but isn’t it necessary to have a larger group of people to form your own guild?

「I’m fine with the idea. I don’t belong anywhere anyways.」

「Same here.」

「Right, that settles it! It’s really helpful that you were so quick to make up your minds.」

Now then, all three of us fell silent. There was this awkward kind of silence in the room……

「We should decide on the name of our Guild. What do you say for “Pencilgton and Convenient Gofers”?」

「I think that’s OK.」

「And thus the Guild “Pencilgton and Convenient Gofers” is formed!」

「You’ve got to be fucking kidding me!」

Don’t you decide on something so embarrassing! Do over! I call for a frigging do over! …… I know!

「How about “League of Sh*tty Games”?」

「Make a guild yourself if you want such a lame name. Besides, not all of us are sh*tty games maniacs, you know? So how about “Outrage”? Doesn’t it sound cool?」

「I would never personally trust anyone from a guild like that. I would be afraid they might be a PK guild or even worse.」

「I would watch my back with them as well.」

This proposition was rejected. We would sound like people who would stab others in the back for the pettiest of reasons. After that the conversation went on for a while, with each consecutive proposition being firmly rejected. Example? Here you go:

“Samurai Slayers” since we defeated Gravekeeper Wezaemon. Too flashy, so it was a No Go.

“Unique Trinity” since we defeated a Unique Monster with the party of three. Too simple, so it was a No Go.

“Gold Rushers” since we were all broke and one of us had a huge-ass debt. Only one of us had true financial problems, so it was obviously a No Go.

「What’s so bad about “Gold Rushers”? I like the sound of that……」

「But Pencilgton is the only real gold rusher in here.」

Hmm…… Something cool-sounding that would satisfy us all…… What would that be…… Oh, I think I got it!

「How about “Wolfgang”?」

「After that jet-black wolf you mentioned before?」

「Even a grade schooler can farm levels, but that name would suggest that we aim to bring down the most powerful of Unique Monsters in the game. And the word itself sounds a little bit like German, so the coolness factor should only skyrocket because of that, right?」

And no, I don’t have any intentions of competing with “Black Wolves” in any way. It is also symbolic. Not many people out there can be as strong as Saiga-0, but if I’d be able to gain strength with my own effort that would allow me to challenge the Night Prowler, that would be more than enough of a gratification for me.

「I see. It certainly has a nice ring to it.」

Pencilgton says while nodding his head, agreeing to my proposition. Katsu also agreed, since he had no real reason to reject that name.

「So rather than a victory celebration-cake, this was a guild establishment-cake.」

「It was surely delicious, but why the hell did we decided on a birthday cake in the first place……?」

「I don’t think that there’s any point in overthinking that too much…… Oh, here it comes, here it comes.」

I don’t know when he managed to order that, but the barkeeper brought us three cups filled to the brim with something that looked and smelled like fruit wine. Each one of us took a cup and then Pencilgton took the lead again:

「To celebrate the birth of the “Wolfgang” guild…… Cheers!」

「「Cheers!」」

We then chugged our drinks. This was indeed a fruit wine and it was quite delicious if I do say so myself.

「What a nice taste.」

「I thought it was just fruit juice with added water?」

「But can we drink wine just like that?」

「No worries. It’s a non-alcoholic one.」

Non-alcoholic wine is like a hot dog without the sausage inside of it.

「Oh, by the way? We formed a guild and it’s great and all, but who is going to be the guild leader, I wonder?」

「…… First goes the rock,」

「Paper!」

「Scissors!」

I went with Scissors.

Pencilgton went with Rock.

Katsu with Scissors as well.

「Up to three wins!」

「Forget about it!」

「God damn it!」

「Welp, do your best, Mister Pencilgton, the Guild Leader.」

「Sanraku, who was marked by the Black Wolf itself…… Do I need to remind you that even your reaction speed was not enough to beat that Unique Monster?」

Please don’t remind me of that. It was enough of a trauma for me as it is, you don’t have to make it any worse than that. But still……

Looking at us now I was really starting to wonder just how in the hell did we manage to end up here.

「Pencil Sis, let’s go play at the swings!」

「Pencil Bro!! Buy us some yakisoba bread!」

「H, hey, stop! That! Don’t you say things like that to me! It’s embarrassing! You’re not my stupid little brother so cut that out!」

For some strange reason I started to feel a kind of compassion for that poor Allslot.

And that’s how it went. Pencilgton went to do a marathon all the way to Fiftsia saying “Got to get the money ASAP so I can have my weapons back!”. He seemed to be down to level fifty as well, so I wonder how he was going to do that?

Katsu went to the previous area, saying that he wanted to grind some levels to get back to where he was before the Gravekeeper battle. He also said “It’s weird that my level right now is lower than Sanraku’s”.

I was going to go back to Rabbitz to meet with Emul and see if the broken reactor can be repaired. And since Pencilgton was now broke he couldn’t get me a teleportation scroll. That is why I messaged Emul and told him to go to Thirdrema at the appointed time. Fortunately, no one would suspect anything since they would think I was simply chatting with some other player.

「Five more minutes until Emul gets here……」

「Umm…… Are you perhaps Sanraku-san?」

「Nope, sorry, you’ve got the wrong person. My name is “Sasoraku”.」

「Ah, I see, I’m so terribly sorry……」

「No, no……」

I affirm that person that nothing really happened and I smiled brightly (while still wearing a mask) and when that person looked the other way I quickly jumped into one of the back alleys, getting as far as humanly possible from them.

「No, that can’t be right…… I could swear that the font read “Sanraku” and not “Saso”…… “raku”!?」

「Well, this sucks.」

Goodness gracious, right now I felt like a Hollywood star being chased by paparazzi in search of some hot scoops. Because of that I managed to memorize the whole net of Thirdrema’s back alleys by heart. I emerged somewhere behind a pile of rotting boxes. That player…… I didn’t catch their name, but I do believe it was a girl. One that looked like she just started the game not that long ago.

「Not to mention that she looked poorly equipped at that……」

It would be a whole different matter if it was a player that looked like they had experience or high enough level.

But what did I expect? Up until now I was known as the “Pervert that runs around half-naked”, and “Pervert that carries a bunny on his back”. But now, since my reputation suddenly skyrocketed to the level of “Slayer of a Unique Monster”, people were bound to talk to me more often on the streets. Might as well get used to it.

「Now then, whatever should I do……?」

First order of things: let’s go to Rabbitz.