Chapter 86: The Eldest Son

Chapter 86: The Eldest Son

Truth fell into the sky, a tiny speck gazing in terror at the awesome beings that filled the void between stars. Even the stars were monstrous, glorious things- a chariot pulled by an unspeakable chimera, whipped on by a naked woman with an owl’s head. A being with the head of a hawk, holding a burning sword astride a wolf. A bird, larger than a city, larger than a continent, made entirely of fire and the memory of a mother’s warmth he had never known.

Some instinct pulled his eyes to one side. There was a serpent coiled on a rock and bathed in its own beam of light. Its scales were mottled, brown and black flecked with red and gold, and its eyes missed nothing. He was fascinated. Literally fascinated- he could not look away from the great being.

Relaxed but ready. Not looking, but seeing all. Armored, but not hindered. And you simply knew that any fight would be finished before it began.

No. That was his misunderstanding. It did not fight. It was at peace or killing. After which, it would be at peace again. Truth had the overwhelming urge to bow in thanks. He didn’t have that much control over his body, but he did his best. Botis saw, of course. But said nothing. Which was fair. Truth was hardly worth his attention.

Truth realized he was moving. It was hard to tell how fast or in what direction, lost in the whirling infinite of beings impossibly grander than himself. But something in him was being called. Pulled. Or was he the one pulling himself toward that unknown place?

It felt like falling, though, of course, he did no such thing. In the infinite void, there was nowhere to fall to. Still, it felt like falling, moving without control towards whatever passed for down and whatever doom awaited you at the bottom. He felt like he should be staring at everything. Memorizing as much as he could. Fixing the natures and truths of these beings in his mind. Each was a fountain of wisdom. Of arcane knowledge. If only he could see them clearly! If only he had the slightest foundation to build upon!

Truth suddenly understood why so many went mad seeking visions of Heaven. Or the heavens. It was all wisdom. It was all holy. And infernal. And everything in between. Everything was perfectly true if you could understand what you were seeing. And everything would deceive the unwise and unwary. He understood now! The wisdom of the heavens could only be revealed to the deserving, for only by personal revelation could the truth of Heaven be understood! Yes, it all made perfect sense!

A hand, rough and calloused, grabbed his head like a melon and smashed him into the dirt.

Truth looked around. The heavenly glory had vanished, though it was still night. He was not where he was before. This... smelled marshy. Hot, humid. Dry soil, but marsh nearby. A small woodfire, a man in coarse woolen clothes. Long hair, roughly covering part of a handsome face. A... somewhat familiar face.

Brutal, angular lines carved high cheekbones and a wide jaw. Deep-set eyes, shaded over by long hair. Undeniably handsome in a rough, primal way. Corded with lean muscle. This was a manual laborer. And he resembled the parts of Truth that the worms had given him. Not exactly the same, but you would be forgiven for thinking them related.

“A smart little clay doll would have stayed on its little ball of mud until it was completely fired. The weather out here will wear you into nothing.” The man spoke conversationally, poking something in the fire.

“But then, you aren’t quite right, are you? Hard for you to stay put. Come, let me take a look at you.” Truth pushed himself up off the ground and walked over. The thought of arguing simply didn’t occur. Couldn’t occur. The man, this place, took all his attention.

Strong, rough hands took his chin and tilted his face around. He was examined but not really able to examine the man back. The rough man was tan. Somewhere between rubbed bronze and faded leather. Someone who worked out in the sun all day. The rough man stank- body odor and manure.

“What happened here?” The man started chuckling. “I’m not even mad. That’s hilarious. Life’s done you dirty, huh, kid?”

Truth wanted to explain that he had no idea what the honorable senior was talking about but would absolutely love to tell him anything he wanted to know. Unfortunately, some part of him recognized a rhetorical question when it heard it. The man waved Tuth towards a patch of dirt next to the fire.

But what had he just seen? What was that? Was that... really God?

Hey, System. Did you see what I just saw?

No. Nor can I understand your memories of it. What I just experienced... I don’t know what I just experienced. I need to think.

I guess we can let the Worms drive the magic resistance cultivation.

Can we? Super. Shut up. Leave me alone. This is. Not right. I... shut up. Leave me alone.

He looked over at Etenesh and Jember. Of the three of them, Jember was doing the best. He looked rocked but not lost. There was a definite glimmer to him, fading, but there. He had brought something back on from his journey. Etenesh was weeping.

Etenesh kneeled in the dirt, palms pressed to her eyes, and wept. She sobbed, the sound despairing. She had lost something, Truth knew. Something precious. She was no longer the same woman who came up the mountain. His heart hurt.

He knew he should embrace her. He didn’t dare. Then Jember gave him a look and nodded toward his cousin.

Truth crawled over to her. He couldn’t stand. Not just yet. “Etenesh. May I hug you?” He asked. Awkward, hesitating. Not sure where to look or put his hands. Etenesh didn’t respond. Her palms were still pressed to her eyes. Eventually, she nodded. Gently, as though she were made of spun glass, Truth wrapped his arms around her.

She was very warm. She was shaking with pain. He didn’t know how to comfort her. He didn’t know what to say. He just held her silently. Kneeling with her in the dirt. Until she came back to herself.

He... had the horrible feeling he didn’t give good hugs. He just didn’t know how to. He had hugged the sibs before, but not often.

“I am ruined.” She murmured. “But I am not alone in that. We are all ruined. The whole world. Ruined.” Her hands were still pressed over her eyes. “There is no hope. No salvation.”

Truth let go of her shoulders and gently grasped her wrists. For a moment, he thought he smelled tobacco. “Maybe we are. Maybe everything is pointless. Maybe nothing really matters. But so what?” He tried to put a smile in his voice and didn’t really succeed. “If we are all screwed, shouldn’t we make the best of what we’ve got? Eat good food. Pet good dogs. Maybe find someone willing to touch you. That last one might be a stretch, for me at least.”

That got her snorting. Then she broke down crying again. Truth felt awful. “I’m sorry. I’m not good at comforting people. Once upon a time, my brother asked me why I kept pushing. Kept trying. When everything was hopeless and everyone was against us. He threatened to kick my ass if I said, “Keep the faith.” That got another wracking sob from Etenesh.

“I didn’t have an answer for him, but I think I do for you. I can’t stand the thought that I’m helpless and things are hopeless. So I’m going to act like they aren’t. I’m going to take every sensible chance. I will do my very best. And I won’t be a good sport about it if I fail.”The initial instance of this chapter being available happened at N0v3l.Bin.