I am only deceiving you with my words but not with my heart
The spring rain in Ji’an Village had been continuous for two days before finally starting to clear up. Before sunset, Jiang Huaixi and Lu Zizheng had dinner together. After dinner, Lu Zizheng cleaned up the dishes and went to the kitchen to wash them, while Jiang Huaixi stood beside her, helping her tie an apron and roll up her sleeves, occasionally chatting and teasing each other.
Just as Jiang Huaixi was about to take the clean dishes from Lu Zizheng, she faintly heard the sound of a vibrating phone in the living room. She put down the dishes, wiped her hands clean, and gave a slight smile to Lu Zizheng, saying, “Let me take a call first. When you’re done washing, come out. You’ve been staying at home for two days, don’t you want to go out for a walk?”
Lu Zizheng curved her eyebrows and smiled while washing the dishes, “Sure, okay.”
Jiang Huaixi left the kitchen and entered the living room, picking up the phone from the coffee table. She calmly answered the call and sat down on the sofa.
It was a call from Jiang Huaichuan, inquiring about Jiang Huaixi’s well-being and reporting on the situation at home and the company. Jiang Huaixi replied lightly, assuring him not to worry about her. With him taking care of things at home and the company, she felt at ease.
Upon hearing Jiang Huaixi praising himself, Jiang Huaichuan felt reassured and elated, much like a child who scored a perfect hundred on a test and was praised by his parents. He couldn’t help but become a little more relaxed and less reserved in his speech, half-jokingly inquired, “Sis, how are you and Zizheng doing? Mom and Grandma made a bet on whether you and Zizheng have progressed further in your relationship. Mom says you are patient and can’t be rushed, but Grandma says you have determination and can accomplish great things. I’m curious to know who won.”
Jiang Huaixi couldn’t help but smile, her voice carrying a hint of amusement, as she replied softly, “Well, the bet doesn’t concern me, and you don’t need to know the answer.”
On the other end of the phone, Jiang Huaichuan heard Jiang Huaixi’s slightly teasing tone and couldn’t help but feel delighted, “Sis, from the sound of your cheerful voice, I guess Grandma must have won, am I right?”
Jiang Huaixi smiled without confirming or denying it. Seeing Lu Zizheng walking out of the kitchen, she said casually, “Alright, if there’s nothing else, I’ll hang up now. I’m getting ready to go out.”
Jiang Huaichuan hesitated for a moment, and just as Jiang Huaixi was about to end the call, he hurriedly called out, “Wait, sis!”
Jiang Huaixi furrowed her brows slightly at his hesitant behavior, slowing down her motion of hanging up the call, and asked, “Yes, is there something else?”
Jiang Huaichuan stammered for a moment before saying, “Does Zizheng’s phone no longer work?”
Jiang Huaixi replied, “Yes, after Auntie had an accident, Zizheng’s phone ran out of credit, and later, with everything being busy and chaotic, she didn’t get around to topping up. When we arrived here, Zizheng said it was of no use, so she didn’t bother to pay for it and kept it switched off.”
Jiang Huaichuan let out a sigh and said, “No wonder. Sis, lately, Lian Xuan from Fengshang has been constantly looking for her, asking about your whereabouts, trying to find your personal phone number. It seems like she’s looking for Zizheng urgently. Should I tell her?”
Jiang Huaixi was taken aback and furrowed her brows even more.
Lu Zizheng came out of the kitchen and walked into the living room, standing not far away with a smile, waiting for Jiang Huaixi to join her in going out. Jiang Huaixi squinted her eyes, raised her left hand, and made a gesture with her index and middle fingers crossed, indicating that Zizheng should go ahead and put on her shoes while she finished up. Understanding the signal, Lu Zizheng went towards the entrance.
Jiang Huaixi asked Jiang Huaichuan, “Previously, there were rumors that she and Zhou Zhong’an were going to get engaged after the Lunar New Year. What’s the situation now?”
Jiang Huaichuan pondered for a moment and replied, “I heard she called off the engagement. There’s some family trouble going on.”
Jiang Huaixi’s heart sank a little, and her brows furrowed even tighter. After a pause, she told Jiang Huaichuan, “Don’t tell her anything for now. Wait for me, I’ll ask Zizheng about it.”
Jiang Huaichuan complied, obediently saying, “Alright, I understand.”
After ending the call, Jiang Huaixi bent down to put on her shoes at the entrance. Lu Zizheng had already finished putting on her shoes and stood by the door, gazing tenderly at Jiang Huaixi. She considerately asked, “It seems like it’s getting windy in the evening. Do you want to change into a jacket?”
Jiang Huaixi straightened up after putting on her shoes, gave a gentle smile, and took Lu Zizheng’s hand, leading her outside. With a light and teasing tone, she remarked, “Zizheng, it seems like you’ve quickly adapted to the role of Mrs. Jiang, huh?”
Hearing this, Lu Zizheng’s cheeks blushed slightly, and she tightly interlocked her fingers with Jiang Huaixi’s, not looking away. The address “Mrs. Jiang” made her feel sweet and shy. She tried to hold back her smile and lightly retorted, “Who’s Mrs. Jiang? Clearly, I’m the ‘attacker’ here!”
Hand in hand, the two strolled along the path towards the beach, accompanied by the evening glow and the evening breeze.
Jiang Huaixi let out a sigh and playfully lamented about Lu Zizheng’s rebuttal, “Zizheng, I didn’t expect you to be so heartless, forgetting about me after putting on your clothes. It turns out my affection was in vain…”
Upon hearing Jiang Huaixi’s playful lament, Lu Zizheng couldn’t help but glance at her. Seeing a hint of lively grievance on her normally composed face, Lu Zizheng couldn’t contain her laughter. She lifted their intertwined hands and lightly patted the back of Jiang Huaixi’s hand, pretending to be serious as she scolded, “Speak properly.”
In an instant, Jiang Huaixi’s expression changed. She suppressed her smile, raised an eyebrow, and lowered her voice coldly, “Are you trying to scold me?” The atmosphere instantly turned serious.
Lu Zizheng was taken aback, biting her lip as she looked at Jiang Huaixi’s displeased and chilly demeanor. Softly, she said, “I’m sorry…” Her voice sounded both aggrieved and adorable.
With a slight snort, Jiang Huaixi squinted her eyes and said coolly, “Recognizing one’s mistakes and correcting them is of utmost importance. Don’t let it happen again.”
Lu Zizheng hung her head, biting her lip, looking pitiful and on the verge of tears, as she helplessly gazed at Jiang Huaixi.
Jiang Huaixi couldn’t hold back any longer and burst into laughter, playfully touching Lu Zizheng’s face, saying, “Zizheng, I didn’t realize before that your acting skills were this good… However, I don’t like this pitiful and aggrieved look.”
Lu Zizheng huffed softly, turned her head back, and walked side by side with Jiang Huaixi in silence for a moment. Then, she turned to Jiang Huaixi and said seriously, “I don’t like it either. If possible, I hope that from now on, the expressions I show you will always be filled with happiness.”
A hint of a smile flashed in Jiang Huaixi’s eyes as she spoke gently and firmly, “I’ll work hard together with you.”
On the beach, a group of children, around ten years old or so, were playing together, perhaps building sandcastles. They chattered and laughed, creating a lively scene. The setting sun’s glow enveloped them, creating a dreamlike and somewhat surreal atmosphere.
Jiang Huaixi held Lu Zizheng’s hand as they walked along the coastline not far from the children, enjoying the sea breeze in a relaxed manner, taking one step at a time.
Jiang Huaixi hesitated for a moment and then suddenly spoke to Lu Zizheng, “Zizheng, Huaichuan told me that Lian Xuan is urgently looking for you. Do you need to reply to her with your contact information?”
Lu Zizheng’s figure slightly paused, and she stopped walking, looking at Jiang Huaixi with a hint of surprise. Fortunately, in Jiang Huaixi’s eyes, she only saw gentleness, sincerity, and composure, without any probing or displeasure.
She turned her head, gazing at the setting sun now resting on the horizon and the vast, boundless sea shimmering with ripples. After a moment, she turned back to Jiang Huaixi with a radiant smile and said, “No need. She’s already a person from the past. There’s no need to bring up memories outside of that.”
Jiang Huaixi looked at Lu Zizheng, her eyebrows slightly curved, and responded with her gentle and faint smile, saying calmly, “Alright.”
Lu Zizheng suddenly tilted her head, chuckled lightly, and asked Jiang Huaixi, “Aren’t you going to ask what happened between me and Lian Xuan in the past? Aren’t you even a little bit jealous?”
Jiang Huaixi chuckled softly and raised Lu Zizheng’s hand, which was tightly held in hers. She said calmly, “No matter what happened in the past, the person holding your hand now is me, isn’t it? Why should I be jealous?”
She then raised an eyebrow, slightly proud, and added, “Moreover, it seems like you prefer me more. So why should I worry about being jealous, hm?”
Lu Zizheng widened her eyes slightly, incredulously said, “If we talk about who among the people I know is the most skilled in saying one thing but meaning another, that title undoubtedly belongs to you.”
Jiang Huaixi didn’t mind and joked, “But I’m only being ‘two-faced’ with you.”
As they were talking, suddenly, there was a burst of argument on the beach. Lu Zizheng and Jiang Huaixi turned around to see the group of children who were happily building sandcastles a moment ago, now engaged in a dispute. A boy had kicked over a sandcastle that belonged to a girl nearby, and he was loudly berating her, saying, “What are you all saying? So what if you’re prettier? Having six fingers is obviously better than five fingers, right? You six-finger freak!” He then turned to the other children and challenged, “If any of you think hers is better, why don’t you ask her how she grew six fingers? If you want to know, stay and keep her company.” After his outburst, he pushed the girl to the ground, stormed off angrily, and the other children followed, looking unsure and leaving one by one. There was one girl who hesitated and kept looking back at the crying girl on the ground but eventually left too. In an instant, only the weeping girl remained on the beach.
Lu Zizheng watched the girl, observed her tearful distress, and in that instant, she felt an overwhelming empathy as if time had turned back, putting her in the girl’s shoes.
She let go of Jiang Huaixi’s hand and quickly stepped forward to help the girl up, patting the sand off her hair, and comforted her softly, “Don’t cry, don’t cry…”
The girl looked at Lu Zizheng with tear-filled eyes, and her first reaction after standing up was to hide her hands behind her back, not letting Lu Zizheng see.
Lu Zizheng touched the girl’s head, wiped her tears, and gently brought her hands back to the front. She lovingly caressed the extra finger and said softly, “You’re so adorable. In my opinion, your sixth little finger must be a gift from a fairy sister who finds you cute and lovely. Why hide it?”
The girl lowered her head and said sadly, “But they all don’t like it. They bully me because of this. They call me a monster…”
Lu Zizheng looked at the little girl and then glanced at Jiang Huaixi, who was standing next to her with a gentle gaze. Memories of the past years flooded her mind, and she sighed softly, feeling a sense of relief. She shook her head gently, touched the little girl’s face, and said, “They mock you because they are ignorant and don’t understand anything. The reason they keep using this to ridicule you is that they envy you. Only when you possess something they can’t have, they try to bully you in other ways to make themselves feel better. Don’t feel aggrieved or angry. You did nothing wrong. You should know that they are the ones who are more pitiable; you have more than they do.”
The girl seemed to understand somewhat and blinked her eyes, remaining silent for a moment. She said, “Sister, your words are similar to what my teacher told me. The teacher said that all ill intentions will eventually come back to those who harbor them. So, when others bully me, I just need to remember to be brave.” After a pause, she showed a childlike smile with teary eyes and continued, “Sister, you are as beautiful as Teacher Lin. I’m sure you can become good friends with her.” As she spoke, the girl who had left earlier and then returned approached them, holding the girl’s hand, and apologized, “Sorry, Ah Yu, I ran away just now.”
The girl smiled and replied, “It’s okay, you came back.” In just a few words, the two girls seemed to forget all the unpleasantness that had happened before and happily resumed building sandcastles together.
Jiang Huaixi smiled, looking at Lu Zizheng, and casually praised her, “Zizheng, I suddenly realized that you seem to be much braver than I imagined, than what I remember.”
Lu Zizheng reached out and hugged Jiang Huaixi’s waist from behind, resting her chin on Jiang Huaixi’s slender shoulder. She smiled tenderly and responded, “That’s because now I have you. Huaixi, with you by my side, I fear nothing, I care about nothing, and I can find solace in anything.” She paused briefly and spoke earnestly, “Huaixi, if spending all my courage from the first half of my life was meant to meet you, then I’m willing to say that I embrace it wholeheartedly.”
Jiang Huaixi’s heart warmed, she turned her head and lightly rubbed her nose against Lu Zizheng’s. After a long moment, she sighed softly, “Zizheng, I’m afraid I’m not good enough…”
This one sentence, so heartfelt and weighty, she was afraid, so afraid that Lu Zizheng might regret it, that she spoke too soon…
When Jiang Wang received a call from Xu Baihan’s younger brother, she was sitting with her legs folded in the coolness of the art studio. The lights were off, and she was gazing quietly at the portrait of the sixteen-year-old Xu Baihan…
On the other end of the phone, Xu Baihan’s younger brother’s voice sounded hesitant as he asked, “Fourth sister, is that you? It’s Baitao. Can we meet tomorrow for a meal? I have something very, very important to tell you about my sister.”
Jiang Wang remained silent for a long time, so long that Xu Baihan’s younger brother thought Jiang Wang might not answer him. Finally, he heard Jiang Wang’s faint response, “Okay.”
After hanging up the phone, Jiang Wang seemed somewhat tired. She closed her eyes and hugged the drawing board, resting her chin on top of it, as if leaning against Xu Baihan’s dense, black hair. For a long time, she didn’t move at all.
Time passed, and she finally opened her eyes, putting the drawing board down on the floor and not looking at it again. She pushed herself up, her legs already numb, and stood up, step by step, making her way towards the bathroom.
Jiang Wang stood expressionless in front of the washbasin, turning on the tap, and listened to the sound of water rushing into the basin, gradually filling it with icy-cold water. She bent down, getting closer to the basin, and little by little, she dipped her face into the freezing water, feeling the oxygen in her lungs gradually depleting, feeling the bitter and painful sensation in her nose due to the water filling it, feeling the agony of suffocation approaching…
Yet, a smile began to creep up on her face, in the water, her features twisted in pain due to the near-suffocation, but the smile was unmistakable.
“Excellent…” Jiang Wang said to herself, “Yun Bo, you must firmly, always remember this feeling of near-death. Remember, this is the outcome of loving Xu Baihan once…”