Death Cap - Twenty-Six - Crashing the Party Before They Crash the Party

Death Cap - Twenty-Six - Crashing the Party Before They Crash the Party

Death Cap - Twenty-Six - Crashing the Party Before They Crash the Party

The plan, or at least the objective was simple.

Ratescos Union had started moving smaller things to their new headquarters already, but the big move wasnt going to happen for another two days. That was when things would be more or less official. That same day, a bunch of union big-wigs were going to pop up and have a big meetup at the new headquarters. It was, from what I understood, a sort of twice-yearly event that was pretty important.

The bullies, of course, wanted to crash it.

The way Gary told it, the last time there was a big move theyd ended up arresting two of the mid-level bosses on the way over on spurious charges and caused a disturbance. It was one of the reasons theyd put off the current move.

So, the union was willing to pay me to ensure that the bullies were too busy to even think of causing that kind of trouble.

The way he put it, they were hiring a bunch of non-union street folk to cause some trouble. Break windows, start a few brawls, and generally send a message to the cops that the union could cause lots of trouble if they actually wanted to flex.

Theyd pay a shilling for every bully taken out of action, which Gary had very carefully reminded me meant busy not dead.

Dead police were bad. It would break the tenuous non-aggression agreement the union and the city government had.

So, for distracting one officer Id get the equivalent of twenty-four-ish mushroom skewers sold. That wasnt too bad, but it didnt beat a days work. If I wanted to earn more with this mess then Id need to distract at least five, maybe six officers. More, because I was taking a day off to plot my operation.

The rules were simple:

No killingNo maiming in a permanent fashionNo destruction on a grand scale

So I couldnt just light a big factory or two on fire and call it a day. That was unfortunate, it would have been easy.

Still, I had other ways to cause chaos. Non-lethal but exceptionally chaotic methods.

I had, in my possession, two mushrooms that I thought could work wonderfully to cause some mischief.

[Bottle Pop] - Rare

A mushroom which fills with flame-proof spores, water, and methane, each within their own separate sacs within the fruiting body. On receiving a strong enough impact, the mushroom explodes, lighting itself on fire and spreading its hardened spores out around it to penetrate nearby materials. The spores are mildly poisonous. The fumes created by the explosion are mildly toxic.

And, of course.

I didnt want to talk about what happened to me while testing this one on myself.

The bullies tended to wear bright blue britches. I giggled to myself, imagining them repainted a whole new colour from within.

I decided that the test was a success and headed home for an early nights rest. Id need as much sleep as I could get for the next day.

I left home at the crack of dawn. The Union was going to start the final part of the move at around ten, which gave me a whole three hours to get so many bullies confused and busy that they wouldnt be able to even think of interfering.

Honestly, if I had it my way, Id drop one of my new toys into the bully changing room while it was still full. I bet they only had one or two toilet stalls in there.

I wasnt actually stupid enough to attack their headquarters though, which was in a much nicer part of town. Instead, I had to be a bit more conservative and cautious. If I, at age seven and a bit, had skills that allowed me to use magic and do some pretty incredible things, then an adult with bully-training and years of experience would be leagues ahead of me.

So I had to balance risk and reward.

My first thought was to set off the mushrooms while next to patrols. It was moderately safe, since I could trigger them from afar, and it would be easy to get away afterwards if I positioned myself well.

But the rewards... I'd hit what... two of them? They usually went around in pairs. It was better than any other idea I had for the moment.

Id need to find or buy a slingshot, and then Id need to practice with it.

I gathered all of my mushrooms, then placed them in a large bag before heading out. I needed a name for them too. Stink bombs? The people hit by them would certainly stink afterwards. I ran through a few names until I realized that I was spending more time on that than on actually thinking ahead. Fuck it, purple fart bombs. The plan was juvenile enough as it is, why not go all the way.

My first strike had to be my best one, which is why, after some consideration, I decided to leave the slums I lived in to visit the slightly nicer slums next to the Gutter.

The bullies almost all lived in a part of the city Id never visited. From what I understood, it was the middle-class area, and it was far safer and nicer, though it was still kind of terrible. They had tiny apartments stacked atop each other there too, but the walls were made of brick and they had proper heating and power and even water.

When the bullies did come to the worse slums, they tended to do so reluctantly. And that would be their downfall.

I grinned to myself, then pulled up a bright blue bandana to cover my lower mouth. My shirt and overalls were plain and common enough and covered in a small coat Id knit together. I also had a ratty cap on to cover my hair. I could ditch most of my outfit in a moments notice, and then my otherwise eye-catching hair could serve as a disguise. That was the idea, but I wasnt sure if it would work on people who had criminal-catching skills.

I shook my head and focused. I was nearing the Gutter, and out ahead of me, on the corner of one of the busiest streets where five roads met in a mess of traffic, was a very popular stall where the local bullies gathered to refill their tea before the morning began.

Today, theyd regret being so predictable.

***