CH 15.7

“Jiho.”

I heard his voice calling me outside. His steps got closer, and I could see Yeon Woojeong’s face in the doorway. He smiled as he found me and walked inside.

“Does it hurt?”

After placing what he was holding on top of the dresser next to the bed, he sat down next to me and took away the ice pack. 

“It’s swollen.”

A voice and eyes with a hint of laughter. I felt breathless when Yeon Woojeong’s hand touched my cheek. Although I knew this would make me look like a child, I put my head on Yeon Woojeong’s lap and hugged his waist. He touched my cheek, giggling.

“Did you take your meds?”

“Mhm.”

“What about the porridge? Do you want to eat later?”

“Mhm.”

Yeon Woojeong put back the ice pack on my cheek. But I needed Yeon Woojeong’s hand more than cold ice. As I dropped the ice pack and grabbed his hand, he laughed and put his palm on my cheek.

Is it the medicine? Or is it really because of Yeon Woojeong? The pain seemed to subside a bit.

“You know what?”

He stroked my cheek with his thumb and began to talk. I raised my eyes and looked up at him. The affectionate gaze faced me.

“There was a saying back in the day. The wisdom tooth grows with first love, and the bigger it is, the more it hurts.” (TN: Wisdom tooth in Korean is 사랑니, which literally means love tooth)

“…”

“What do we do? I’m the reason you’re in pain.”

I could tell that Yeon Woojeong was teasing me since there was laughter in his voice. But if there really was such a saying, I guessed it wasn’t wrong. I quietly blinked my eyes and then I opened my mouth.

“When I had just gotten to the youth shelter, all of a sudden my knees were really hurt. I couldn’t sleep at night because they hurt so much.”

This must be temporary, I’ll get well soon. I thought so, and when it was about a week, I suddenly felt worried. What if I get a serious illness? What if I’m dying like this… I went to the hospital with a few small bills that I had with me since I left home. 

“I was told it was growing pains. That I would get taller. I was short when I was young.”

I was asked if I wanted to get medicine prescriptions, but I just left because I didn’t think I had enough money to buy the medicine. The pain in my legs felt even more torturous because I didn’t know when it would end. 

“I simply wished that I wouldn’t get tall.”

I wondered why I had to go through pain to grow, thinking that it might be better to just cut off my legs.

The pain diminished over time, and I really grew taller by the day. But I couldn’t forget the new kind of pain I felt alone in an unfamiliar place.

“And now…”

I blinked, blankly, and finally let out the words that had been stuck in my throat. 

“I think it’s fine even if the pain doesn’t end.”

The smile faded from Yeon Woojeong’s face. His thumb didn’t stop moving and kept caressing my cheek. The warmth he transmitted drowned out the pain. After a long period of silence, Yeon Woojeong asked.

“Do you think I’m right?”

I didn’t answer him. Yeon Woojeong heaved out a light sigh and kissed my eye.

“I will never catch up with you for the rest of my life.”

“What do you mean?”

“You’re born lovely.”

He whispered. He was the only one who thought of me in that way.

“You’re so puffy.”

Yeon Woojeong lowered his head. His lips landed all over my cheeks.

My feelings won’t end even if this pain completely disappears. Am I suffering from Yeon Woojeong then? Anything was fine. I liked him for his unending. 

“I wish I were sick instead of you.”

I shook my head as I heard the muttering. That should never happen. I would rather be sick than see Yeon Woojeong get sick. 

As I lay dazedly in Yeon Woojeong’s arms, I let out a whine from time to time. And every time, Yeon Woojeong would kiss my cheek.

“Would you still look like this if you hadn’t lost your baby fat?”

“How do I look now?”

“You’re cute and too lovely to look at.”

Normally, I would have cringed and dismissed it, but since I was sick, it wasn’t bad to hear it. I rubbed my cheek against his palm. Yeon Woojeong carefully patted me on my ears with his fingers.

Yeon Woojeong continued to talk to me. He only showered me with loving words, talking in a pleasant tone. My eyelids turned heavy as I listened to him. His voice stopped not long after I closed my eyes.

The room was quiet, but the stillness didn’t make the pain worse. I breathed quietly in Yeon Woojeong’s arms. The pain slowly melted away.

***

“It’s 23,600 won.”

Even after I told her the amount, the woman did nothing and just stared at me. Sometimes, there were indeed some people stealing glances, but it had been a long time since I met someone who looked at me so openly like this.

“It’s 23,600 won.”

I spoke again, more sternly, but the woman still looked to have no intention to pay. This level of rudeness was rather light, so I just stayed quiet, and she suddenly opened her mouth.

“Are you a college student?”

“No.”

“A high school student?”

“No.”

“A middle school student?”

“I’m just a twenty-year-old.”

There was no other customer, so I couldn’t just tell her to quickly pay for it. The woman laughed at me as she took out a business card. I accepted it, and it had CEO written on it.

“I’m a clothing store owner. I’m doing it both online and offline, and if you look it up, it’s pretty big. And the sales are good.”

It was a place I had never heard of. I had no interest in clothes, so that was natural.

“I’m wondering if you have no intention to be a model. You’ve done it, right?”

“No.”

“Really? You just need to wear some clothes and get your pictures taken. Sometimes you get to go out to Europe and take pictures, and the pay is quite good, so check out the site and let me know if you’re interested.”

I put her business card in my pants pocket, and she finally handed out her card. After taking payment, I returned it with a receipt.

“Check out the site once even if you’re not interested. You don’t have social media?”

“Yes.”

“What a bummer. I can give you sponsorship if you do it and have a lot of followers.”

I wasn’t even a celebrity, so I couldn’t understand what she meant by sponsorship. As I simply nodded, she looked at her watch and left.

Back when I worked in a barbecue restaurant, a drunken old man told me to be a celebrity. The drunk couldn’t have been serious, and the other employees listening were snickering and gossiping amongst themselves. That time suddenly came to mind. To me, what that woman had just said also didn’t sound serious.

It was almost time to go home. The boss came back on time as I tidied up the counter. I went straight home after my shift.

I washed, had dinner, then immediately opened my books on the table in the living room. I did have a desk in my room, but strangely, it was more comfortable here. It was also because I could be with Yeon Woojeong when he got home. Sometimes, I used my desk at dawn when I couldn’t finish my homework because I played around with Yeon Woojeong.

Yeon Woojeong said he would be a bit late today. A bit late usually meant he would be home around 9. I looked at the time and picked up my phone. Yeon Woojeong was in the prosecutor’s office. Sometimes I found it strangely satisfying to see his location. I didn’t know the reason. I just felt so.

It wasn’t that hard to study. I was a bit slow in understanding the national language, maybe because I wasn’t used to reading, but I was getting better at it, and mathematics was easy. About English, I memorized the words thoroughly so I could understand a bit, but I got a lot wrong. The rest of the subjects were mostly about memorizing, and I didn’t worry about them because I was confident in my ability to memorize.

And… I liked when Yeon Woojeong taught me. He always asked “Why do you think so” whenever I got something wrong. I told him my opinion slowly, a bit stuttering, and sometimes I told him “I thought this because of this.” Then, he would explain the solution to the correct answer seriously, and sometimes with laughter. His eyes looking down, and his clear tone and his finger gestures he did unconsciously when he was explaining. The time when he was focused on me, and I was focused on him.