Chapter Thirty-Nine - Where Things Go

Chapter Thirty-Nine - Where Things Go

Chapter Thirty-Nine - Where Things Go

He that is without sin among you, let him yeet the first stone.

(John 8:3)

--Excerpt from The New Youth Bible of 2044

***

Do you want me to lay out the situation for you? I asked as I helped Lucy to her feet. She paused, then stretched, and for a moment I was distracted by that little bit of belly that appeared when her shirt rode up.

You make it sound serious, she said.

It sorta is, I said. We saved that girl, and uh, now shes here. And shes a bit of an orphan.

Lucy turned and looked at me. Youre so predictable.

What? I asked.

She pulled me over, gave me an unfortunately chaste kiss, then used my shoulder as a place to rest her head while hugging me. Predictable, she muttered. You saw the girl, felt bad about it, then decided she needed saving, right?

Well, I mean, at a certain angle you could certainly paint the situation to look like that, I said.

She pinched my butt, or tried to. The armoured undersuit I was wearing made that a little hard. Hmmph, she said as she was robbed of one of her favourite past-times. Well, whatever. We should have some funds, and as long as the girl doesnt mind sleeping in the same room as the twins it should be okay.

Right, speaking of funds, I made lots of money.

Okay?

Like... multiple millions.

Lucy pulled back and looked at me. I guess thatll help.

I thought youd be more excited, I said.

Can we spend some of that on cute clothes?

I rolled my eyes. Yes Lucy, we can.

Good. The rest... I guess rent? Well need proper food too. I dont know if we can stay in this much luxury forever.

We could, I said. Id find a way, if its what Lucy wanted.

Its just a bit much, she said. But whatever, it doesnt matter. Ill find some school stuff for the kittens soon, including the new girl, and... I guess well see where things go from there?

Yeah, sure, I said. Maybe we can buy some other goodies? Or, uh, help people, somehow? Speaking of, I left Gomorrah in charge of the kittens.

Lucy was confused for a moment, then I saw understanding flash in her eyes. The nun?

The pyro nun, yeah, I said.

Cool! Lets go say hi, and make sure the kids didnt get themselves toasted.

I was actually expecting... one of two things.

Gomorrah buried under a pile of kittens, suffocating under their prying questions and being completely lost.

OR

One to ten dead kittens, and a faint odour of charred kids.

Ohh, shes even hotter when she's angry, Lucy said. Thats just so cruel.

Can either of you take anything seriously? Gomorrah asked.

Youre seriously cute, Lucy said. Im seriously contemplating inviting you to a threesome.

Gomorrahs mouth worked while blood rushed to her face. She couldnt seem to decide on whether to glare or just blush herself to death.

I laughed and bumped shoulders with Lucy. Alright, we can tease you later, I said. We do need to, uh, talk about stuff? Mostly I wanted you here because the kittens can be annoying in large doses.

What about me? Katallina asked.

Well, I wanted to see if you liked the kittens. You can still say no, you know? I asked.

She looked to the table, then carefully took the soda Lucy had given her and sipped from it before answering. I guess I could stay? I can leave if I dont like it, right?

Of course.

And I can keep Catkilller?

Lucy blinked. What?

The dog, probably hearing its name, strutted on over while leaving a fresh line of drool on the carpet. One of the kittens whined at it leaving, but the dog didnt seem to care much. It dropped its head onto Katallinas lap and drooled there for a bit.

A puppy! Lucy squealed. She teleported to the other side of the island and was soon rubbing herself against the dog, who seemed to thoroughly enjoy the sudden loud attention. Whos a good boy? Whos a good boy? Your name is Catkiller? Thats a good name, yes it is!

Its an awful name, I said.

I think its a nice name, Gomorrah said.

I huffed. Can we change his name? I asked Katallina.

The girl looked at me, wide-eyed. You cant change a dogs name, she said.

Its literally called Catkiller! Thats like... going to inspire violence with the kittens, or something.

You let me keep a laser rifle, Katallina said.

Thats different, I muttered. Im not sure anyone heard me over the cooing noises Lucy was making while petting the dumb dog.

Are you jealous of a dog?

Im the one she... you know what, Im not finishing that, I said. Taking a breath, I cleared my throat. Katallina. Welcome to the kittens, I guess. Dont shoot any of them, no matter how annoying they get, alright?

Ill do my best, she said. And, uh, thanks.

I gave her a thumbs up, then went to fetch a snack from the fridge. On returning, I placed another bottle before Gomorrah and slumped onto a stool. So, tell me more about these home defence things? I asked.

She closed her eyes. How many points do you have?

About... seven thousand and change?

The nun rubbed at her face. You... are stupid. You could have saved us a day of running around with that amount of points.

My bad?

Alright, let me teach you the principles of spending points as a samurai, because its obvious that youre not learning on your own.