A Tale of Nice Tails

A Tale of Nice Tails

A Tale of Nice Tails

Yuren Jie was not hiding, for he was not a coward.

He had merely... tactically relocated himself to a location where the bloodthirsty mistress of the forge wouldn't immediately see him. Yes, this was wise. Yuren Jie was certain that arriving at the Golden Hoarder Sect would teach him many lessons, and he was correct.

For example, he was learning the wisdom of discretion already. He was not so unwise as to not take this lesson to heart.

The medical pavilion still awaited, but it was atop a peak near the centre of the sect's great holdings. The other new disciples had taken the straight path, across bridges and over ravines, the mad cackles... polite tittering of the forge mistress behind them.

Yuren Jie had chosen a less direct path. Perhaps it would be somewhat slower, but only if he didn't move with great alacrity.

So he moved quickly... from statue to statue and from large stone to large stone, constantly on the lookout for a bloody, hungry smile from the shadows. He froze when he saw motion, but it was just a small cat who stared at him with about as much passion as one could expect from a cat. It seemed to sneer before sauntering off. He wondered if even the wildlife here was... peculiar.

After some distance was made, he felt a weight lift from his shoulders. it seemed as though he would make it in due time with no great risk to himself. This, too, was wisdom. Truly this sect was the greatest if it could impart such wisdom so easily and clearly.

"Why're you sneaking around?"

Yuren Jie started and spun to find... no one. He looked left and right, then cast his senses both upwards and down, but he felt no presence. Had the stress upon his core caused a deviation in his mind?

Turning, he started again as he discovered a woman sitting upon a statue on the path ahead of him. She was clad in strange garments, clothes that were tight against her body, and a large flowing coat like a robe cut down the front. More interesting were her ears. The ears of a cat sat atop her head, perked forwards at attention even as the woman smiled cockily.

Truly, she lacked the aura of a jade beauty, and instead felt like a cocksure, cockless, young master.

"Who are you?" he asked, his guard rising. Was this an older disciple of the sect?

The girl grinned, displaying slightly crookedy teeth. "I'm just a stray," she said. "What are you doing, sneaking around my neck of the woods?"

"This... is not a forest?" Yuren Jie said with a gesture to the area around them. This was one of the lower peaks, a flattened mount with several paths cut into its sides. There were archways here and there, and a few small garden pavilions with fantastic views of the ravines between the peaks. He could well imagine an elder cultivator sitting here and enjoying some ten billion year old ginseng.

The young woman blinked, then stared off into space. "You know, he's right, this isn't a woods, so that saying doesn't make sense."

She nodded. Then frowned.

"I guess it could be some language drift stuff," she continued to speak. He was quite certain she wasn't speaking to him, and was equally certain that she wasn't quite sane.

"I will just be on my way, then," he said.

Yuren Jie nodded along. Was this the fabled fetch-quest?

"I want you to go there, tip over her tea pots, and burn her cakes."

"Pardon?" he asked.

"Sabotage," she clarified. "Sabotage her shop. Don't kill her or anything, you know, just ruin her afternoon."

"Has this woman threatened the Golden Hoarder Sect?" he asked.

The lady quartermaster looked away, not meeting his eyes. "In a manner of speaking."

"That is not as clear of an answer as I expected," he said. Not that he minded too much. If the sect needed him to scythe through ten million innocent civilians to prove himself, then that would be a small price to pay. "Though I am curious as to her capabilities." There had to be something more here."

Stray Cat cleared her throat. "She gave my girlfriend a free sweetcake the other day."

"Pardon?"

"That's basically flirting, you know?" she said.

"You wish for me to punish a mortal because she has laid eyes upon your girl?" he asked.

"She didn't just lay eyes. Laying eyes is fine. My girl is the prettiest girl under heaven, so I can't blame either mortal or immortal for wanting to look. She gave my girl sweetcakes. That's crossing a line! Only I'm allowed to give her cake!"

Yuren Jie looked at her and took a moment to process what he was hearing. It was petty. It was petty and jealous. But it was also a task. One that would surely test his skills. "I accept, lady quartermaster," he said with a low bow of respect.

"Cool," she said. He wasn't sure what the weather had to do with anything, but he chose not to question her. "By the way, you're Yuren Jie, right?"

"Yes?"

"Oh, yeah, you're supposed to be at the medical pavilion. Like, right now. I'm pretty sure if you don't show up soon, Fairy Elaine's gonna be pissed, and between her and a live nuke, I'd rather piss off the nuke, you know what I'm saying?"

Yuren Jie glanced down the path, then bowed quickly before darting along. He couldn't afford to be late!

Once he was done with this medical examination, he would begin upon this quest. It would be one of the first steps towards gaining what he needed to defy the heavens!

***