ONE HUNDRED EIGHTEEN: Unfolding

ONE HUNDRED EIGHTEEN: Unfolding

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By the time Alden finished cleaning up after himself, he was the last student left in the gym except for Maricel, who was talking animatedly to Fragment about what shed seen the other Ground Shapers doing at Earthbox.

He headed toward the locker room, wondering how he was going to haul his exhausted body to North of North and if the recovery sauna was going to be powerful enough to save him. The sound of his own name made his hand pause just before he pushed on the door.

He nudged it open a crack instead of shoving straight through.

like hes special or something. Its just catching balls.

Winston.

I only caught a glimpse, said Kon. But Waker throws so that you can barely see the things coming before theyre on top of you. Catching them might not be impossible, but its not like it would be easy.

And the balls were throwing themselves back! It was great! Instructor Klein was mad because I kept looking over there instead of at him.

And thats Jeffy. I hereby forgive you for making my plaid shirt smell like cheap body spray, Jeffy.

Dont you want the instructors to help you when youre figuring something new out with your powers? Haoyu said cooly. This is a school. Theyre teachers. They teach. Its not that confusing.

Im going to buy more copper appliances for the apartment. L1tLagoon witnessed the first publication of this chapter on Ñøv€l--B1n.

Its not something new, Winston retorted. Its catch. Hes just a B, and BignLittleSnake was so focused on him toward the end of our session it wasnt even as hard to dodge as usual!

It was new, idiot, Lexi snapped. If you actually paid attention to other peoples abilities instead of getting jealous over stupid

Alden threw the door open and hurried in before Lexi could get himself into trouble. He pretended not to notice the hush that fell over everyone. The running showers were the only sound in the room.

Alden smiled blithely around at them all and texted Haoyu. [Make Lexi come with us to use the sauna today.]

Haoyu gave him a surprised look.

[Youre good at making him do things,] Alden said. [Ill pay for the guest pass and the reservation.]

******

You cant keep saying, I guess well invite Kon instead, when you want me to agree to things, Lexi complained as they walked beside the busy street that ran between the edge of campus and North of North. I know what youre doing!

Its not like Im lying when I say it, said Haoyu. Kon and I get along. I really might have invited him instead.

Why do you keep asking me to come here anyway?

For your health and happiness. But today I insisted because Alden wanted you to come, too.

Lexi looked back. Alden was several steps behind them. Why are you making me come to your grossly fancy potion sniffing facility with you? Anddo you need one of us to carry your bag or something?

No. Im fine. I think I just pulled a muscle. Everywhere.

Lexi rolled his eyes, and reached over to take his duffel from him.

Thanks. You A-ranks are so handy. And North of North isnt grossly fancy. Its a very good amount of fancy. Right, Haoyu?

Exactly.

A few minutes later, when they stepped into the gym, the girl who often guarded the lobby presented Lexi with a velvet gift bag full of swag in honor of his first visit.

The smoothies and frozen yogurt are free, said Haoyu.

The showers are big enough for ten people.

Spirit waxing might be real.

Are you two trying to sell me a membership or what?

In Aldens opinion, the place was more than worth the price of the membership that evening.

What was that? he wondered while he stood under warm water in the rainfall shower. He remembered the feeling of his fingers, and his skill, wrapping around tennis balls he probably shouldnt have been able to catch. How was I doing it? What was it that happened?

He didnt know. It was frustrating not to know but exciting to think that Bearer had something like that to show him.

When he arrived at the sauna, there was nobody inside except for Lexi and Haoyu. Usually, there would be a few other people taking advantage of the potion-infused steam, but if you hung around for long enough youd hit a patch or two when everyone else was gone. Aldens roommates were sitting on the bottom bench, their hands moving through the air as they worked with their interfaces.

Lexi glanced at Alden, eyes lingering on the left side of his chest for a moment.

Its not real, Haoyu whispered loudly as Alden sat down beside him. He got it because he wanted to look more mature than the rest of us.

Haoyu, dont tell him the truth. I want everyone to think Im a serious Avowed.

Sorry, said Haoyu. Its very, very real. He killed some people for a wizard, and the tattoo makes it so he can never reveal the locations of the bodies.

Thats right, said Alden. Im a dangerous Rabbit.

Lexi looked at him. You might be.

You do know Im kidding about the murder, right?

I know that. But what was with your reaction time in class today? Lexi asked. You were moving completely differently than you were a couple of weeks ago.

Haoyu groaned. Lexi, you cant even relax and joke around with us for a second?

Silence fell, then Lexi cleared his throat. Knock knock.

Alden stared at him.

Haoyus eyes lit. Whos there?

Alexei, Lexi muttered. He looked like he already regretted doing this.

Alexei who? Haoyu asked.

A lexicon is a kind of dictionary. Do you want to buy one?

Haoyus grin was huge. Alden thought he was probably wearing a similar expression.

You have your own family knock knock joke! he exclaimed.

And he was brave enough to deliver it, too.

Lexi. Kon. Its perfect, Haoyu said.

Lexis face was way too red for the amount of time theyd been in the sauna.My dad made it up when we were little. He thinks its hilarious. Can I ask you about gym now?

I was going to answer you anyway. Alden shifted, trying to get comfortable.

The two of them were watching him expectantly.

This is hard. The parts of it I do think I understand would make me sound crazy. Oh, I could feel my goals aligning with my affixation better than usual. I suspect I was establishing my authority over reality more properly, and that was making the skill more effective in a number of ways that I cant quite grasp justwaitstop running away! Come back, you guys! I dont want new roommates!

I dont think I shouldve been catching some of those, he said instead. Most of those. When it comes to Big Snakes faster pitches, I dont usually have time to think, Left ankle. Right hip. Shoulder. Its more like Yikes! Motion! Duck!

He arched his back, trying to stretch it out. Also, I was very focused onmy mindset. So I wasnt paying great attention to details. He was throwing them at least as fast as usual, right?

Haoyu and Lexi exchanged a look.

I was busy trying to beat Instructor Klein, Lexi said. But

It was getting noteworthy toward the end of class, Haoyu told him. Not the speed of the individual pitches; he was throwing at what looked like his normal top speed for you.

Alden nodded. Snake threw harder at some people than others, depending on what they were doing with their powers and how suited they were to playing high-speed dodgeball to begin with.

But he was throwing a much larger number of pitches at you. For the last half of the session, he wasnt even giving you time to return one before the next was in the air. And he was throwing more multiples your way. You would have needed to be an Avowed octopus to catch all of them.

Ive got to watch my footage.

Before you do, Lexi said, let me askyou didnt know, right? That you could catch something that was being used as a weapon against you. That was why you were so excited even with the first one?

Id never done it, Alden replied. Of course Big Snake isnt trying to hurt us for real, but its a situation where both parties know his goal is to hit us, not pass the balls to us. So it was a decent test.

A much better test than I expected.

Alden had hoped it would be a first step toward sorting out his perception of incoming enemy projectiles. Only a baby step, hed thought, since it wasnt a perfect model of an actually dangerous situation. That was all.

I ended up glimpsing something way different than Id planned. I have practiced playing catch with my skill, but it was to get the hang of preserving objects instantly, instead of halting their momentum and then preserving. It wasnt like

You couldnt always do that? Lexis face was intent. Its something you figured out through trial and error?

It actually took a lot of practice to be able to do it naturally every time.

Could you tell when you were on the right track to getting it? Haoyu asked at once.

How many times would you say you had to try? Lexi asked at the same time.

Umyou two definitely shouldnt use most of my experiences to judge your own progress. I learned a lot of what I know about my skill and my trait during a crisis. There were really unique pressures holding me back in some ways and driving me forward in others.

They both looked embarrassed, which wasnt what Alden had wanted at all.

I dont mind talking about it with you, he said hastily.

He was surprised to realize that it was closer to a truth than a lie. Maybe it was only because hed just heard them defending him when they didnt even know he was listening, but it was a relief, for a change, not to have that internal clench at the thought of possibly being asked a question about Thegund. He was sure it would be back when he was in a different mood, but for now

I played catch with Kibby all the time. She threw gravel. Small pointy rocks arent the most pleasant things to catch, but that worked out for the best because it encouraged me to grab them with the right idea in mind instead of the wrong one. At the time, whenever someone tossed something to me, I had a feeling that I needed to stop it and get a good grip on it before I preserved it.

And when feelings and intuition were all I had to go on instead of my authority sense, it made activating the skill exactly how I wanted to seem like rocket science. It was good theyd asked about this one, now that he thought about it. Instant preservation of moving objects was one of the few things hed made progress with prior to gaining more deliberate control over his affixation.

Practicing my way out of it worked. I got it right more and more often.

Soon enough, even without his expanding senses changing how he understood his magic, halting the rocks properly would have become a knack in the normal way for human Avowed, he was sure. Just one of those things you could do thoughtlessly once youd gotten the hang of it, the magical equivalent of riding a bicycle.

Now its not hard at all. I

The sound of the door opening drew his attention.

Lute Velra walked into the room wearing a towel around his waist and drinking an orange smoothie. I see, he said, wafting steam dramatically toward his nose with one hand, then slurping from his drink. So this is where the spoiled people do their homework.

Isnt it indecent for you to call someone spoiled? Lexi asked.

Lute! Haoyu said. What are you doing here?

Alden invited me. Sorry Im late. I had to make sure I tried all the free samples.

He was peering into the tiny cauldron on the pedestal at the center of the room. He didnt have his patch on, and from this angle, in all the steam, it was impossible to tell he had a false eye.

You might want to drink the smoothie fast, said Alden. Theres no food allowed in here. When other people show up, theyll glare at you.

Lute looked over to answer. Hey! You have a tattoo!

Before Alden could respond, Lute was right beside him examining it.

Does it go around the side? It looks like it goes around the side.

Alden lifted his arm.

Ooooa mysterious triangle.

Alden snorted.

Too much pressure, said Alden, fumbling his way out of the living area. Im going to my room. Maybe I can sense the soup better from in there.

Okay, he thought, after hed closed his door and pulled off the mask. Lets do this right.

He went to kneel on his learning cushion and consider everything he knew and everything he suspected.

First of all, he told himself, it wasnt a neat little trick. So dont let yourself think of it that way.

Catching things with his eyes closed was neat. And it did seem like a fun party trick. But when hed actually been doing it, his intentions had been more serious.

I started thinking of myself as The Bearer of All Burdens instead of Alden. Thats a little embarrassing now that Im not so deeply lost inside my own affixation.

But the effects of it couldnt be denied. It wasnt only that hed been letting his magic lead his hands to the tennis balls locations; hed also been so efficient about it. The more hed watched the video, the clearer it had become. In the last three or so minutes of class, he hadnt just been catching more balls, hed been going for the best ones. Hed obviously started to get a sense for which ones he could actually reach in time.

If being in that headspace had worked once, it would work again. He just had to find a way to get himself there.

He slowed his breathing and let his eyelids fall shut. I should take a look at myself. I should do it like I mean it.

He went backward in his mind, all the way to a better learning cushion in a worse place. Backward to the soft voice of an Artonan kindergarten teacher and the achingly hopeful presence of a grieving girl who kept reaching for a learning partner so that she wouldnt be alone in the chaos anymore. Back to the moment when hed first returned the friendly pat.

There was a spot where the universe made room for Alden. A spot that was him. And when he finally found himself

I have the authority to move here.

He delivered a wizardy fistbump for the first time in months. He sent it rippling out like a tiny, undirected pulse since there was no Kibby here to receive it.

I can move like this. But not all of me.

He remembered the excitement, satisfaction, and joy of that first deliberate exercise of his authority.

And the inevitable horror.

Hi, he thought at the rest of himself. Hows it going? I know youre me, too.

It was unpleasant to think of himself in his entirety, so oftentoo often, he suspectedhe divided it. He pretended that he was his free authority, and his bound was more like an attachment. A useful one he couldnt extricate himself frombut still an attachment.

Thats a big self-directed loving lie.

He sighed and let go of that lie for now.

He knew how to. Denial was a luxury that his last affixation had stripped from him in a profound way, so it wasnt like he could ever really trick himself into forgetting his true nature. It was just an uncomfortable thing to fully acknowledge in a quiet moment like this.

Accepting that I was mostly The Bearer of All Burdens, and only a little bit free, didnt feel that bad earlier when I was focused on doing my job right.

The Bearer of All Burdens could not fist bump Kibby. Ithecould not use an auriad. He would never make an ice pop or light a promise stick. The Bearers infinite futures had been severed, for the sake of single purpose.

I can bear the hell out of some burdens.

Nowwhere was Haoyu?

They were close enough to each other right now that Alden was sure he could have sensed his roommate with the part of himself that was free; hed never tried it for a host of reasons. And anyway, it was an entirely different kind of sensing than Bearer used.

There. That weight.

Judging by the direction, Haoyu was still in the kitchen.

My target has entrusted me with a mug of soup. Its true that its not the most meaningful thing Ive ever been charged with protecting, but its still been placed under my care.

Nothing happened.

Im not feeling it like I was in gym.

He wasnt falling into his role as naturally as he had earlier. Too many thoughts running through his head. Too many desires outside of his purpose. Less urgency.

Maybe if the soup was in terrible danger.

He chuckled.

Im super distractible when Im hungry, sore, and tired. What else can I do?

He remembered the way the skill had felt more alive as he aligned with it.

Just pick some feature of the skill I know how to access and give it deliberate attention. Maybe that will put me in the zone.

He focused on the targeting ability.

I dont usually think about you or work on you much. I havent bothered to conceive of you as something more interesting than a button on a machine yet. How ungrateful of me. You stayed fixed on Kibby for months without ever failing. I wanted you and needed you, but I havent been appreciating what you do.

Alden tried to think about what this part of him waswhat it truly was. He thought of it as a small fraction of his power, and that wasnt wrong. But as he explored it, he found that there was something fundamental about it.

This piece of the affixation runs through everything else Bearer is. Like wires or the roots of a tree.

He was enjoying the origami metaphor for other parts of his skill and he felt like he should keep it consistent, sopaper roots? You could twist paper into root shapes, so that wasnt the most ridiculous thing. But then there had to be an acknowledgement of what the targeting feature did. It pointed him toward his entruster. It gave him that feeling that they were significant. So significant the universe tilted toward them a little.

Also, when I target someone the feeling isnt forceful.

Now that he considered it, that was interesting. He felt pokes and pinches when other Avowed targeted him, but he didnt think he pinched back the same way with his own targeting. Maybe Kibby would be able to tell him what it felt like for sure the next time he saw her. But on his end of things, at least, it was a more receptive process.

Like Im opening myself up or holding out a hand? Should I try imagining its something with roots that opens and tracks things?

Its pretty special. It keeps me connected to my entruster over long distances.

Alden fixed his mind on his sense of Haoyu. All right, so if I wanted to acknowledge and strengthen this part of the skill then

It had never occurred to him to try targeting someone more by manipulating his bound authority. For one thing, it didnt seem necessary. His targeted person was targeted, and he could protect things they entrusted him with. It was such a basic part of the skill that it had gone overlooked.

He worked at it for a while, growing engrossed just as he had on his last night in intake when hed first started reimagining the affixation.

Eventually, as hed hoped, focusing intently on even a small part of the skill like this helped him align himself with the whole thing. By the time hed discovered a way of thinking that helped him become a little more receptive to his target and increase his awareness of Haoyus location, he felt relaxed and more at home with himself.

My entruster is there, he thought. Now where is the thing he told me to preserve?

He stood and left the room.

Eyes still closed, he turned and walked a few steps to the end of the hall. He was careful to keep his thoughts quiet. If he took time to question it, he was sure he would lose it.

It needed to be more like an instinct for now.

He bent and his fingers closed around something, preserving it instantly. He opened his eyes.

Of course they put my soup on the floor under the polar bear head.

He carried it toward the kitchen to reheat it. All three of the other guys were in the living room.

I got it, said Alden, lifting the mug.

Haoyu and Lexi looked at him. Lute turned around in his chair to look, too.

No eyes? Haoyu asked. Or did you just get hungry?

No eyes, Alden confirmed with a grin. Then he yawned. But I am very hungry. And sleepy.

Thats a fun new power discovery, said Lute. Im going to hide things you need in awkward places. To help you train. Good luck finding the toilet paper tomorrow.

Thanks. Youre a true friend.

That took you two hours, Lexi said.

Alden checked the time. It did. Sorry. I thought I was faster than that, but I got kind of invested in the process.

He went over to the microwave.

You can have fresh soup, said Haoyu. You dont have to eat the training soup.

Im going to eat the training soup and the fresh soup if you dont mind. It smells awesome.

Take a selfie with your mug, Haoyu said. Im sending them to my mom. To prove I rock at cooking.

Will do. Alden watched his dinner rotate around on the glass plate. Heyheliotropic flowers are cool, arent they?

Huh? said Lute.

You know. Flowers that always turn to face the sun and follow it across the sky. Like daisies. Theyre a targeting flower. If you were gonna be a flower youd want to be a heliotropic one.

Theyre pretty cool, said Haoyu.

Man, you need sleep, said Lute.

Were you imagining yourself as a daisy when you were trying to target your soup cup? Lexi asked slowly.

Wait! Haoyu cried. Was that what you meant?

Not exactly.

Hed played around with imagining he had an origami targeting shape pointed at Haoyu. Not the soup. And it wasnt really a daisy; it was just a kind of unfolding feeling like a flower opening toward the sun that had gotten him the stronger sense of Haoyus location that hed wanted.

What exactly did you mean then? Lexi asked.

Mmmmmgood minestrone. Im just doing some metaphor stuff, Lexi. Trying out everything. Approaching magic from new angles. No big deal.

Is it working for you?

Sometimes. It did take me two whole hours to find my supper though. Thats forever. So maybe dont take my advice.

Alden ate every bite, then he pulled the leftovers out of the fridge and refilled the mug.

[Lute: Theres a birthday thing for Uncle Benjamin tomorrow night. Its not a huge party. Like fifty people. Im getting an invite from Aimi. Do you still want to come?]

Yuck, thought Alden. Yes.

Im going, Haoyu said.

How many more times do you think youll have to practice until you can reliably find your entrusted object? Lexi asked.

Hes got a one track mind.

You mean until Im good at it? Alden said.

I just wondered if you knew

I can reliably find it already, probably. If time isnt an issue, Im sure I could do it again. But Ill keep practicing until I get a lot faster. I want to find a way to hit that point I was at in gym today at will instead of after half an hour of having a superhero pelt me with fastballs.

How far away do you think?

Theres a distance limit on how far away my target can be from whatever theyre entrusting me with, so not that far. Haoyu could probably tell me to go find something hed left downstairs but not across campus. And he might need to have at least a general idea of where the item is himself before he can tell me to get it. We havent tested that. That would make it way less useful for finding lost objects. But this is still a good way to train myself. And maybe I can have one of you throw some stuff at me. Ill help you with whatever you want to practice, too.

Your new codename is Ball Catcher.

You can go to that party alone, Lute.

Cotton Balls?

By yourself.

This narrative has been purloined without the author's approval. Report any appearances on Amazon.

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