Chapter 21 Hatred

So did I want to help her with her work again? "Is it really okay if I trouble you with my care, though, ma'am?" I needn't mention it, she said. As she also said, just by looking around us I could see all of the work she had, in abundance, which meant I wouldn't just be taken care of if I decided to stay with her, but rather take care of myself. Honestly, at that. She said this place was even denser in work compared to the place at the marketplace. I could only agree with her. It couldn't even compare, to be honest.

"Thank you. Really. You're kind to me."

"Awfully mature, for a child! And, no," she smiled. "I'm the one thanking you. Come on in, now. Make yourself comfortable."

This inn was so huge and crowded it almost reminded me of my place of birth. The restaurant. In both places, wooden tables and people were scattered all around. In the restaurant though, it'd been quieter, neat, and organized. In her inn, things weren't nearly as structured. This place was more vivid and vigorous, to say the least. I kind of liked it.

After having exchanged these brief words with her, the kind ma'am guided me to a lone table, in one corner of the tavern. Huh? I thought. What's she doing? Indicating me to wait up a bit, she scurried away and went back to me. Before I even waited, she brought me enticing and alluring dishes.

"Wait—"

She urged me to eat first. It was fine. I'd only start to work tomorrow. Or was she to throw an apron at me and demand I start to work right this instant when there are already so many customers to serve? To be quite honest, she said I'd only be a bother if I started without proper training. "What's more… I shall only accept a strong working force here," she patted my head. "So you grow strong first. You got one night. Ha-ha-ha."

After she insisted so much, and as her words made much sense, I was just a "good boy," as the woman put it, and accepted her kindness. Again. Conveniently, I just chowed the food down. And time went by.

After a while, a beautiful lady joined me at my table. One of the kind ma'am's daughters. She only took some time to talk to me and make friends as she wanted to put it because there wasn't so much work at present. It was really getting late now. Customers were scarcer.

"So what's your name again?"

"Kiddo."

"I mean your real name, you ding-dong."

Between two Munchs, I replied. "It's—It is Kiddo. Your mother calls me that. Which means it has to be."

"Fufufu. Aren't you a funny little guy, you."

A name, huh? A name was something you were called with. Hers was Eunelle for example. And mine… was probably Kiddo. Perhaps.

"Eunelle."

"Mmm, yes?"

"I don't have a name," I told her. I only ever called people by their distinct traits. Like her mother, for instance, she wasn't whatever she called her, she was Kind Ma'am. The same went for her, she wasn't Eunelle, she was Food Lady. Having explained to her that much, she burst out laughing at my calling her a food lady, not really knowing how she should feel about her nickname. "Oh, so those are nicknames, I understand."

"Yes, nicknames. Your nickname would be Kiddo, according to your own logic. Right, Kiddo? Fu-fu. And, eh, Kind Ma'am, huh. You're correct. Mom is kind." From our chatting about names or nicknames, the conversation became one of business. We talked about work. And my job, too. She spoke of many things. First off, she was glad I accepted their offer. Also, she filled me in a little about things I'd be doing tomorrow. And after a while, we—or she alone, for she almost managed to get a conversation going all by herself, began to ask me more personal questions again. She was quite the charming lady, so I enjoyed my time with her. Somehow though, she talked too much. Her appraisal of me was that I was a quirky an eerily mature kid full of creativity, she said, adding "with a bright future" and a thumbs-up.

"Now it gets me wondering!"

"What does the food lady want, now?"

"H-Hey! That's mean. I was just curious about… what would a little guy like you, no older than— Oh! I can't believe I didn't ask! What's your age, little one?" Tired of saying I didn't know, as I was in fact one-day-old, I thought of an age for myself and gave it to her. I was eleven. "What's a kid your age, no older than eleven, yes, going to do outside the village past sundown?"

I said I wanted to go and see monsters. That wasn't a lie, and I figured such a comment coming from a kid wouldn't get me in prison for being found out as a monster or anything. "Phew~ Aren't you the bold type, now~ It's okay to be afraid, though. You didn't go out after all. The monsters are too scary even for a big food lady like me, you see."

I shook my head and said no.

"No? What is it then?"

"The monster, Eunelle, why is everyone this eager to… capture it and kill it, in the end?"

"Isn't that because the monster's a big villain?"

I put both my fork and knife down. I kind of wanted to ask what if it didn't want to be a villain, but I couldn't bring myself to ask that question. Part of me believed everyone was a bit of a villain, and that was only natural. It was inherent to life and being an individual. If you're not a villain, then you're a liar.

"You Eunelle, and Kind Ma'am too, oh, and your younger sister—if it were only you guys, would you still want to capture it and kill it, the monster?"

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"Of course we would! What'd you think? Because we're women, we'd let 'it' go away? No thank you. I'll show you one day," she theatrically held her fists to me, and mimicked a master of combat, "how I'll fight the 'monster'!"

To her comment, my fist was clenched, my eyes dropped down, and I frowned. "Th-That makes sense… But still… why?"

"What's that? Mumbling to yourself like this. I can't hear you."

"Ha-ha," I smiled a smile that didn't reach my eyes, "it's nothing."

"Then I shall get going."

"Okay."

As the girl stood up and went away, I was alone with my thoughts. Am I the only one being selfish when I say I want to live…? I'm certainly not. People are selfish. Everyone is. It's kind of like the villain thing. If you're not selfish, then you're a liar. The simple attribute of being an individual, in that sense, forces people to be selfish. But the monkeys who attack me do not comprehend. That's why they're so intent on making me disappear, fighting their crusade against me. I want to live. I want to survive. And yes, I'm being selfish. Yes, I'm being a villain. But at least, I'm not a hypocrite.

Frustrated at Eunelle's words, some tears gathered in the corner of my eyes. Those were only crocodile tears, however. So don't pity me. In any case, when I asked the food lady about what if the monster didn't want to be a villain, that didn't really apply to me. I was fully satisfied to be what I was.

But anyway! This place surprisingly started to become full of life again. And me? I was full of life, too. I ate a lot. So now, I was done here. With strength, I lifted my body up, "Aaah! Full of energy!" I stretched my body. And only after I cleaned up all the dishes I left at my table, obviously because I ain't a dirty boy, I would move upstairs. Eunelle told me I'd have a room up there, so that's where I'd sleep. I sure went a long way, by the way.