CH 5.12

‘Oh, my God.’

I feel as if I’ve become a satellite that can’t escape its orbit.

I blinked and looked at him, but his face as he looked at the guests was nonchalant. As if our hands weren’t interlocked under this cloth.

I’m the only one who doesn’t know how to accept this. My heart is pounding.

‘Oh really… what should I do?”

I have never felt so giddy liking someone so much.

To be honest, Lacius was my first.

But is it okay for my heart to beat like this even though I know the future?

I got lost in a mixture of guilt and excitement.

I have a calm and bright smile on my face, but my heart was nothing like that.

‘There are about six months until the original heroine appears.’

The innocent lady who had lived in her hometown in the countryside not even knowing she was aristocratic. Then her grandfather, who raised her, dies, and the story unfolds as she finds an old letter in the storage room.

A letter from her biological father. Coming into the capital with that was the start. And it’s the Royal Princess’ birthday party where she’ll first appear.

Lacius will fall in love with the original heroine, who never harassed him or became interested in him.

He’s holding my hand now, but when the time comes, he’ll naturally go to her.

Because in the original work, they fell in love like fate and attracted each other like magnets.

‘My heart aches.’

Lacius gazed at me with inquisitive eyes, perhaps because my hand lost strength without knowing it.

Then, without anyone noticing, he held my hand tighter.

“Are you tired?”

“No, that’s not it.”

“You looked tired. If you have difficulty walking in your high heels, I will carry you.

Lacius asked earnestly. When I saw the blue-grey eyes that contain only me, my heart skipped a beat. A louder beat, which covered a little of the guilt I felt, resonated through me. 

To the extent that I think I should listen to it.

* * *

After the engagement ceremony, I naturally thought I was going back to the Schweiden house immediately.

But Princess Dioles wasn’t planning on letting me go.

“Where are you going? Why don’t we have a glass of wine together first?

“uh… wine?”

“You’d have to drink to celebrate.”

Her eyes were too intense to resist.

Somehow, I was taken away, feeling that I should go if she told me to go. I found myself seated in an elegant inner garden.

“Isn’t it pretty?”

“It’s really pretty.”

The ivy and morning glory that wind through the pillars are harmonious. A small peach tree, which seemed to hang fruits soon, blossomed a beautiful cluster of flowers, and a brilliant crescent moon hung at the end of its branch. 

However, the princess shook her head briefly.

“No, not the flowers. I am talking about you, who are in this landscape.”

Oh, so you’re asking me about my beauty?

Of course, I’m pretty, but it’s kinda embarrassing to admit it myself. Between the small bushes which do not reach the knees, oil lamps are placed to illuminate their environment. Even though it was inside the imperial palace, grass bugs were chirping as if they were in an elegant forest.

Without responding, I turned towards the bushes filled with flowers.

“It’s night, so the flowers are asleep. Even that made the place more mysterious and beautiful. No one’s ever been in here other than Peridot and Ziontin.”

The princess explained as she put the bottle of wine against her chin.

It’s a little uncomfortable having to drink something that I haven’t brought with me. However, this does not mean that I can refuse something that the princess personally offers by saying, ‘It could be poisoned!

I nudged Lacius in the thigh.

It meant that he should at least smell it before drinking it. 

“When I was a child, I often played hide-and-seek here with Lacius.”

“Lacius as a child?”

“Are you interested?”

The princess smiled happily with her blue eyes, sparkling.

Lacius quietly poured wine into the three glasses.

A liquid with a strong fruity scent was poured into a clear glass, and I took a sip of the glass given to me.

‘Sweet?!’

I was a little reluctant to try because I was afraid it would be bitter, but it wasn’t.

It’s sweet, but it wasn’t the kind of sweetness that comes from pouring sugar into it. It tastes the same as the one I had earlier. Earlier, I thought it was sweet because I was in a good mood, but it seemed like it was originally sweet.

“Lacius was my playmate. Even when I was a kid, I preferred to play with boys, so father made me play with Lacius”

“I can’t imagine it. Little Lacius playing hide-and-seek.”

“I have always been the tagger. Lacius hide from me.”

Ah, I’m starting to picture it.

The princess drank the wine in one gulp, immediately emptying the glass.

Then she handed her glass to Lacius.

“Lacius hated people, since then. Lacius was very unique, he was the first person who dared to hate me.”

“It’s not hate, but rather dislike.”

“That’s the same thing.”

“It is somewhat different. However, anyone would run away if the seven-year-old princess chased after them with a wooden sword.”

Lacius answered calmly as he poured the wine into the glass.

Somehow, I fell in love with the conversation between the two and fell into the illusion that their childhood was playing out in front of my eyes.

The princess, who must have been arrogant in her childhood, like now, pursues the boy with a wooden sword. The boy must have climbed a branch with a nonchalant face. The current Lacius has long hair, but it must have been short when he was a boy. I was kind of curious about that too.

‘But isn’t this a big deal?’

I saw someone write that being curious about someone’s childhood is the start of love.

What was he like as a kid before he became what he is now?

You can see the future together, but the past is the past, so you can only listen to it.

‘Ah, but I can’t be with him in the future either. ‘

Perhaps because the wine has already made me tipsy, I suddenly have negative thoughts. I laughed and relaxed.